Talk Gertie to Me
By Lois Winston
“You’re listening to WBAT-Big Apple Talk Radio. I’m Gertie, and this is Gertie Gets Even. Go ahead, caller. You’re on the air.”
“Hi, Gertie.”
“How can I help you?”
“All the guys I meet turn out to be snakes or skunks. What should I do?”
“And you live where, caller?”
“New Jersey.”
“Ah! Well, that explains everything. As I see it, you’ve got two choices. You can either call an exterminator or move across the Hudson. We don’t have any snakes or skunks here. Just two-timing rats. Next caller. Go ahead. You’re on the air.”