CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

DECEMBER 26th

MONDAY, 1:45PM

KELSI

 

A Greyhound bus pass and a backpack, is all I’m taking with me. It’s all I need. I packed three bottles of water, four snickers bars, a pack of condoms, six wife beaters, eight boxers, twenty grand in cash, two framed pictures of my moms and a pistol. Destination? New York City. I don’t look at it like I’m running away from home because home died when my moms was killed.

I an’t say I know exactly where I’m going but I know what I’m gonna do. I have enough information to find who I’m looking for, or to get ‘em pissed enough to come looking for me. I don’t give a fuck how it goes down just as long as we get it over with. The way I look at it, I ain’t got shit to loose. If I die I’ll be with my mo, but if I live, they’ll have to kill me because I won’t rest until I hunt down his ass along with anybody he fucking cares about.

For two months I’ve been dealing with my mother’s death only to realize I ain’t dealing. Getting up in the morning, still expecting her to come out and say “Good Morning K-man,” even though I asked her not to call me that. What I wouldn’t give to hear her call me K-man now. What I wouldn’t give to hear some advice.

You ain’t felt alone until you walked this earth without your mother. See at any time your pops could get mad, walk out and you’d never see his ass again. See mothafuckas expect them to roll out because that’s what they do. People base their love on whether or not support checks come on time or not. I guess if that be the case, I can say mines ain’t fuck with me at all, but your moms ain’t got no option to roll or to not support your ass, she gotta do it. At least mine didn’t. It was me and her against the world. I could do anything with her by my side.

Some people may think I’m fucked up but I don’t give a damn. Murder is a way of life and I rest easy knowing that one day, I’m gonna die too. Good! Take my life! I want to see my moms. It’s the cycle of things. How you gonna live on this earth if mothafuckas don’t move over and die? It’s gotta happen but before I die, I’m gonna take out every mothafucka who ever made my mother cry, pops included.

And that night, that night was like a fucking nightmare. When Kenosha slid by to pick me up from the Point, I ain’t have no idea of what was in store for me. That nigga completely demolished our apartment. Ripped shit up. Broke shit. Took shit. It was fucked up and worst of all, my mother wasn’t there, not even her body or no signs of it.

I called the one person my mother trusted, Skully. He told me that Jarvis probably had something to do with it because of that Nick dude drumming up shit. He figured word probably got back to them New York niggas that moms had moved to Maryland and they sent their hounds. I believed him. I believed it was all Jarvis’s fault, because even if he ain’t kill my mother with his bare hands, he was still responsible for all the shit he put her through. He set my moms up, left her hanging and shot her twice but she still ain’t die! Somebody should’ve told that nigga that a true soldier lives forever!

Shit, she even took the fall for all my murders. She wrote a note and had someone mail it if she ever came up missing. In it she confessed to the murder of Charles, Delonte and even what she referred to as the “Murder at Haines Point.” It worked out perfectly because a few days later, Lakeisha’s lifeless body washed up at the Point and the rental car I used was still parked in the same spot. I always wondered how she knew not to include Lorenzo’s name on the confession. I knew the murder at Haines Point was supposed to be for Lorenzo but instead it ended up being for Lakeisha.

Maybe it was the same instinct that told her to tell Shelly to look out for me so that bum ass Lorenzo couldn’t do it. Or maybe it was because she didn’t see it done and wanted to be sure first. I don’t know what her reasons were, but she looked out for me, and her confessions allowed me the freedom to avenge her death! I know I sound like a super hero, but I don’t give a fuck. She kept me free so I can free her and because of it, they don’t know the time or the hour I’m coming, but I will be there.

Since I ain’t never see her body, I held onto the hope that maybe she wasn’t dead, but on Christmas Day, I was delivered a package I’d never forget. I was sitting in the living room with Lorenzo, Shelly and Lorenzo Jr. They were opening gifts but I wasn’t in the mood. The doorbell rang and it was a FedEx delivery person with a package for me. When I sat and opened it, it rocked me. My mom’s heart was in a box with a note saying, “Nobody has heart when they’re dead.”

I couldn’t cry. I had shit to do and tears would blur my vision. It was obvious they wanted beef by disgracing my mother’s name so I decided to bring it. I was staying with Shelly so rolling out was too easy. I told her I had some things to take care of and when I’m done, I’d be back and if I’m not, don’t come looking for me.

The next thing I did was call Skully. He told me he understood what I had to do and why I had to do it. He even told me a few places to look for Jarvis and Kyope. Real helpful right? I know. A little too helpful for me. When I thought about all the things he did for us I remembered what she used to tell me, “Nothing is as what it seems.” The more I thought about it, the more I had a feeling she was right. I’m not sure if Skully is down for me, but I do know that only time will tell.

The next thing I heard was like music to my ears, “Ladies and Gentlemen, Welcome to New York City.”