Sixty-Five

‘This year, sometime, I’ll come back to you,’ Stephen had promised.

But both he and Elinor had known it wasn’t in his power to make such a promise. He couldn’t know how the war would go. He couldn’t know if he would come back at all. What his words meant was that he wanted to come back to her, and though that was what mattered, though that meant everything, she had to face it every day – all she really had was hope.

‘Ah, lassie,’ her mother said, seeing Elinor poring over the casualty lists in the paper, reading up about the latest battles, ‘now you see what love can bring. Heartache, eh?’

‘It’s better than having no love at all.’

‘Why’d you never tell me about your Stephen before, though? Why’d you keep everything secret?’

‘It was because of Dad. I thought he’d never approve and might – you know – get into a state.’

‘Aye, he might’ve done. Or he might’ve been pleased. You never could tell with your dad. Anyway, when do Corrie and me get to see this laddie of yours?’

‘As soon as he comes back.’

Their eyes met, and the words hung in the air. ‘If he comes back  . . .’

It was a great help to Elinor that Brenda now knew about her relationship with Stephen, for it meant she had someone at the Primrose who shared the anxiety she was otherwise keeping to herself. Of course, Brenda told her, she’d always known there was something between her and Stephen – hadn’t she once said so? And now that they were together again, in spirit, anyway, she couldn’t be happier for them.

‘Oh, it’s such a shame, though, just when you should be so radiantly happy, you’ve had to be parted, eh? Life’s so cruel.’

‘I do feel sort of radiant inside, though I know I don’t look it,’ Elinor murmured ruefully. ‘No, don’t say I do, I’m sure I look as though I’ve been ill.’

Only one person, in fact, had asked her if she was well, and it was Major Henderson. Stopping her in the hall one morning, he gave her a long, sympathetic look, and said he hoped she wasn’t overdoing things, she was so pale. Perhaps she was anaemic? He could arrange to give her a test.

‘No, no, I’m fine, sir, thanks all the same. Just – a bit anxious.’

‘It’s not Barry worrying you again, is it?’

She smiled and shook her head. ‘I haven’t seen Barry for weeks. No, it’s  . . . well, there’s someone in the army I care for  . . . he’s at the front.’

‘Someone you care for?’ His expression had subtly changed, from one of kindliness to one of surprise. ‘Forgive me – I had the impression there was no one.’

‘I knew him before. We had  . . . drifted apart.’

‘And now he’s in France? I’m sorry – no wonder you’re anxious. Let’s hope there’s good news soon.’

‘You think there might be?’

‘Everyone believes the Germans are tiring. So are we, of course, but we have the Americans now.’ The major shrugged and smiled. ‘Can but hope, Elinor.’

‘I live on it,’ she told him, and they went their separate ways.

There were in fact some good things to take pleasure in, mainly Stephen’s letters which were as comforting as Elinor had expected. Well written, never downhearted, often amusing, with little drawings and stories of trench life, and always gratitude for her own letters to him. She worried at first that she wasn’t as good at writing as he was, but as time went by, found she was improving and came quite to enjoy putting her thoughts on paper to him. As well as sending him his knitted mittens, of course, and small parcels of chocolate and biscuits, if she could find them.

‘It really helps, sending things,’ Brenda remarked one day in March. ‘And Tam loves goodies. Will be getting something else soon, though.’

Something about her expression made Elinor’s interest rise, and at her look, Brenda couldn’t contain herself any longer.

‘I mean news, Elinor. News that he’s going to be a father. It was that Christmas leave that did it – I’m going to have a baby in September.’

Oh, that really was good news! Wonderful news! Elinor hugged Brenda over and over again, and almost shed a tear or two, she was so happy for her.

‘But you’ll be leaving, eh? And I’ll miss you so much. Don’t leave too soon, will you? Keep well and keep going as long as possible.’

‘Hey, I’ll be wanting to put my feet up!’ Brenda laughed. ‘But I’ll stay as long as I don’t look like a house-end.’

‘You’ll be one of those neat ones, I’m telling you. Oh, but this is such lovely news.’

There was more good news a week or two later, even if not quite as personally interesting, except to Miss Ainslie, who brought it.

‘Elinor, Elinor!’ she cried, when Elinor was fetched to meet her in the hall. ‘Splendid news, my dear! Did you hear? Have you read about it in the papers?’

At Elinor’s blank face, she drew her to one side.

‘We’ve got the vote, Elinor! We’ve won the day! Women over thirty are to be given the vote – it’s been approved by parliament. Oh, I’m so happy, I can’t believe it!’

‘That’s wonderful, Miss Ainslie. I think I did read about it now you mention it. But it’s no’ for everyone, is it? I mean, don’t you have to own property, too? That rules out a lot of women.’

‘Well, it’s true, there are those qualifications, but it’s a start, isn’t it?’ Miss Ainslie’s eyes were shining. ‘After all the work women have been doing in the war, it’s no more than common justice that we should be given the vote, and I’m sure it will come to everyone eventually.’

‘You’re right, it’s a start, and I’m very happy for all the people who’ve worked for it,’ Elinor said truthfully. ‘But are you on leave just now, Miss Ainslie?’

‘Yes, but I’m not idle.’ She laughed. ‘The war news is good – we may see an end to hostilities this year. Which means, my dear, that this place will be coming back to us.’

‘Back to the club?’ Elinor asked, astonished.

‘Well, it has to come back and I’m making plans already. I don’t think I’ve a hope of getting the old staff together again – they’re all doing something else – but I am hoping you will consider an offer I’m going to make?’

‘An offer?’

‘You remember Miss Denny, my assistant manageress? Well, she’s now married to someone in the Guards and won’t be returning. Her job will be vacant and I want you to take it.’

‘Me? Assistant manageress?’ Elinor was stunned, her eyes on Miss Ainslie’s face enormous. ‘But I couldn’t do that!’

‘Of course you could! Didn’t you do that office management course? That will be very valuable for the sort of work you’d be doing, and I know you’d do it well. Now you just think about it and we’ll discuss it later. There’s no hurry; we’re not quite ready to be moving back yet!’

Leaving a bewildered Elinor staring after her, Miss Ainslie flew away, seeming so keen and energetic, it was clear her years of war work had changed her not at all.

Assistant manageress, though? At one time, Elinor knew she would have been over the moon that she could ever be considered for such a post. Now, though, the only words that were really registering with her as she turned away, were those Miss Ainslie had mentioned quite casually: ‘The war news is good – we may see an end to hostilities this year.’

Words that were an echo of others that scarcely left her mind. ‘It’ll end this year, Elinor, I promise you. This year, sometime, I’ll come back to you  . . .’

This year? It seemed too much to believe that Stephen might be proved right, that this year, the war could be over. Better not think too much about it. Better just keep on. Wait and see. Have patience. Hope.

Yes, and better get back to Private Norris. She’d been halfway through cutting his hair for him when she’d been called down. Not that he’d be wanting her to hurry back, had probably been smoking ever since she left.

Slowly, she began to climb the stairs.