Three Weeks Later
A pulsating pain shot through Six’s body as she slowly opened her eyes. The room was dark, and she was unaware of her surroundings. Beep, beep, beep, beep! The steady tone of the machines around her was all that could be heard. The small sound seemed so loud inside her head. Each beep made a sharp explosion go off inside her brain, causing her great pain. Her eyes darted wildly around the room as she searched for something familiar. Where am I? What happened? she thought frantically as she tried to move her body. Her lungs felt deprived for air as she struggled to breathe deeply. She wanted to sit up, she wanted to scream for help, but her body would not cooperate. No matter how hard she tried, she was unable to move. Her throat felt like it was on fire, and her heart rate increased dramatically as fear gripped her body. Beep, beep, beep, beep! The sound of the machines intensified, and she heard the sound of people rushing into her room.
“Is she all right? What’s happening to her?” Six heard Big Lou’s voice, and her eyes scanned the many faces that were surrounding her bed as she tried to locate him.
“I’m sorry, sir, you have to wait outside. You can see her once we’ve stabilized her.”
“Is she okay? Just tell me what’s happening!” she heard Big Lou demand, his voice frantic with worry.
“Free!” she cried out. His voice was the only voice that she didn’t hear. He was the one that she needed right now. Where is he?
“I need her calm. Her body is in shock,” one of the doctors instructed. Six watched as a young nurse filled a syringe with fluid and injected it into her arm.
“No! Free—I want to see Free!” Six cried in a raspy tone. Her voice was almost inaudible. Her body was weak, but she still fought against the hospital staff as she begged to see her man.
“Look at my hand and count down with me,” a doctor stated.
“Five, four, three, two…” before he even got to one Six felt her eyelids close involuntarily, taking her to a temporary sanctuary of peace.
Six opened her eyes and immediately sensed the figure who was sitting in the chair beside her bed. She couldn’t move her head to see who it was, but she could feel him watching her.
“Free,” she whispered, her voice cracking.
“Free’s not here, Six. It’s me, Big Lou,” he whispered as he stood up so that she could see him. “You had me worried for a minute, sis.”
“Where is Free? What happened to me? I feel like I can’t breathe. Why isn’t he here?” she asked.
“You don’t remember anything? You don’t remember what happened?” Big Lou asked her in bewilderment.
“No, where is he, Lou?”
Before Big Lou could respond, a middle-aged black man entered the room. He was wearing a long lab coat with blue scrubs underneath. Big Lou was grateful for the interruption. He didn’t know how to tell Six that Free was dead.
“Six Jones,” the doctor stated as he walked up to her bed. He took off his stethoscope and placed the cold metal to her chest. “You are a very lucky young woman.”
“What happened to me?” she asked the doctor. The doctor’s face immediately expressed confusion as he looked toward Big Lou.
“She doesn’t remember,” Big Lou answered the doctor’s question before he could even ask it.
“Well, Ms. Jones…” the doctor started. He was hesitant to inform her of her condition. “You were shot in the head. You are extremely lucky to be alive. That’s why you are having such a hard time moving and breathing. During the shooting, a part of your brain called the cerebellum was injured. A part of the brain stem that controls your breathing was also injured. The massive head trauma that you have sustained has caused you to become immobile.”
“I’m paralyzed?” Six whispered with tears in her eyes. She stared up toward the ceiling as she tried to process what the doctor was telling her.,
“Not exactly. The damage is not permanent. But your body has to learn how to function again. That’s why you are hooked up to the breathing machine. Your brain is not sending the correct signals to the rest of your body. You can’t breathe or move on your own yet.”
“Where is Free? I need him?” she said as her tears began to flow. She gasped for air, struggling to breathe.
“She doesn’t know?” the doctor asked as he looked toward Big Lou again.
“I can’t tell her, yo’,” Big Lou said as he gripped Six’s hand and tears began to well in his own eyes.
“Tell me what?” she asked. “Where is he? Big Lou, where is Free?”
The doctor excused himself so that he could give them some privacy.
“Six, he’s gone. He shot you, then he turned the gun on himself.”
Six didn’t respond. She stared at Big Lou as tears streamed endlessly down her face. He can’t be gone. He told me he would never leave me. Why would he do this to me? Free, I need you. Her body shuddered as she thought about the death of Free. He had been her best friend and her heart. She couldn’t find any words to describe how she felt; her heart was numb.
She closed her eyes, and images of Free entered her mind. The entire scene instantly came back to her as she played it back in her head. She could hear the blast from the gun in her ears. She could feel his pain as he asked her repeatedly, Do you love this nigga? Do you love this nigga? Six saw the spark from the barrel of the gun as Free pulled the trigger. “Oh my God! Big Lou! Oh God! He can’t be gone. I can’t do this without him. I need him,” she cried. Tears of despair stained her cheeks as she lay helplessly in the hospital bed. “How did this happen? Where is he? Big Lou—”
“He’s gone, Six…he’s gone,” Big Lou said as he held her hand.
“I just want to be alone,” she stated as she closed her eyes.
Big Lou nodded slowly. “All right. I’ll be right outside if you need me.”
“Big Lou…when is his funeral?” Six asked before he stepped out.
“You’ve been in a coma for the past three weeks. The funeral was two weeks ago.” He waited for her to reply, but when she didn’t, he walked out of the room.
She couldn’t stop the tears from escaping from her eyes. She was deeply hurt by Free’s death. Her soul ached unbearably as she tried to imagine her life without him in it. How did we get here? How did I let this happen? Six stared at the ceiling and gripped her bedsheets as she thought about her tragic lost.
She heard the door open, but she closed her eyes to avoid being bothered. “I just want to be left alone,” she said.
“I want to leave you alone, ma, but there’s something about you that keeps calling me back.”
Six’s eyes shot open in disbelief when she heard his voice. “Britain?” she stated with a quiver as she looked at him as if he might disappear before her eyes.
“Yeah, it’s me…shh, just relax. You don’t have to say anything. I’m here,” he replied as he grabbed an ice cube out of the bucket on the nightstand and placed it to her chapped lips.
Six stared into his eyes. Nothing about him had changed. It had been over a year since she had last seen him. The last time they had interacted she had crossed him, but there was no larceny in his heart. His gaze was still as loving and gentle toward her as it had always been.
“Why are you here?” she whispered.
“Because I love you,” he answered. “Money can be replaced, Six—you cannot. I’m just upset that it had to come to this for me to realize that. I should have never let you walk out my door. I would have kept you safe.”
Six didn’t know how to respond to him. He was so forgiving…. Any woman would be lucky to call herself his lady, but Six belonged to Free. Britain was just a beautiful distraction and a horrible mistake. She had stolen his heart without giving hers to him in return.
“I’m sorry,” she stated.
“I once told you that no matter what happened between us I would make sure you were straight. I didn’t do that, Six. I broke my word to you. I won’t do it again. I know you loved Free, but he’s the reason you’re sitting in this bed hanging onto your life. Let me take care of you. Let me keep my word this time around,” he stated.
Six gave him a weak smile, but they were interrupted when a nurse walked into the room.
“I’m sorry, sir, but visiting hours are over,” she stated.
Britain leaned over and kissed Six’s cheek. “I’m coming back for you,” he whispered. “Get some rest. I’ll be here in the morning. I love you.”
“I love you too,” she whispered back.
When Britain walked out of the room Six cried as her life’s circumstances haunted her. Now was her chance to move on with Britain, but in her heart, she knew that she could never let go of Free. Yes, it was true that she did love Britain, but her feelings for Free were so much deeper than love. They were soul mates, and even though Free was no longer living, Six could still feel his energy. She was in love with Free. She was linked to him in a way that didn’t allow her to invest herself into anyone else.
Six heard the hum of the machines that surrounded her, keeping her alive, then she pictured Free’s face. Britain could be a lovely substitute, but Free was the one who she belonged to…who she belonged with.
“If you die, I die,” she whispered, remembering something that she had told him a long time ago to show her loyalty. Six inhaled deeply as she thought of what she was about to do. She used all of her will to lift her arm. It trembled rapidly as pain shot through her body, but Six didn’t stop until her hand was wrapped around the oxygen tube that was inserted into her nose. She remembered the doctor’s words.
Your body has to learn how to function again. That’s why you are hooked up to the breathing machine. Your brain is not sending the correct signals to the rest of your body. You can’t breathe or move on your own.
“Aghh!” Six whimpered as she tugged at the oxygen tube, yanking it from her nose.
Six’s body immediately went into convulsions as she struggled to inhale. She knew that she was committing suicide and the temporary pain she was feeling would soon disappear. She jerked violently and the monitors beeped like crazy as the hospital staff hurried into her room. They were too late, however. Six felt her soul drifting away as the convulsions died down.
I love you, Free. I’m on my way to you, she thought.
The heart monitor flat lined indicating that Six was no longer alive. The doctor shook his head as he looked at the room clock.
“Time of death…eleven twenty-eight P.M.”
Notes