CHAPTER 3

 

Sparrow Hopkins sat in the small rotunda, gazing out into the surrounding gardens. Dappled sunlight filtered through the trees, creating patterns on the well-manicured lawns. Several gardeners were working on the nearby flower beds, and a slight breeze brought with it the rich aroma of freshly turned earth.

Sparrow looked down at the intricate embroidery in her lap. Her grandmother had first taught her this delicate art when she was a child and she’d never lost the love for it. She’d always found the practice soothing, allowing her mind to wander whilst stitching glorious works of art.

As she sewed, Sparrow thought back over the last twelve months. Being at OWL’s Haven, had given her so much joy. The warm welcome she had been shown by the community had revived her personality and for the first time in years, she felt genuinely happy.

Callie, one of the resident cats, wandered in and rubbed her sleek tortoiseshell body against Sparrow’s leg. Theoretically, she belonged to Louise and Caro, but her sociable nature had various residents trying to claim her as their own. As for Callie, she managed to share herself with everyone whilst graciously declining to belong to anyone, a feline trait that Sparrow greatly admired.

Bending down, she stroked the soft fur, smiling as Callie rolled over for a tummy rub.

“Hello there.”

Sparrow looked up to see Daphne Williams standing at the entrance.

“Hello,” she replied with delight. Noticing Daphne’s hesitation, Sparrow beckoned her in.

“I’m not intruding, am I?” Daphne asked, taking a seat on the sofa next to her.

Sparrow shook her head. “No, not at all, Callie and I are just enjoying the day.”

Callie rose and walked over to observe the willie wagtails swooping around the garden.

Daphne shook her head, watching the cat. “She hasn’t got a chance of even getting near those little fellows. They’ll drive her crazy and as soon as she gets close, they’ll fly off laughing.”

Callie’s tail flicked as the birds swooped even closer to the bougainvillea growing around the sides of the rotunda.

“Sounds like my first girlfriend.” Sparrow chuckled.

Intrigued, Daphne turned to face her, leaning back and stretching her long legs out in front of her. “Really? That sounds like a story. What happened?”

Recommencing her stitching, Sparrow smiled. “I was in my mid-twenties and had only recently accepted I was gay. I’d had a few liaisons, but was waiting to be romanced and wooed. We met at a party and at the end of the evening she made a huge song and dance about wanting to take me out. Wouldn’t take no for an answer. Honestly, I thought I was going to have to leave town. She plied me with chocolates and flowers, took me out to dinner, tried to convince me that I was the only girl for her. I’d heard rumours about her ‘love them and leave them’ history, so I resisted for as long as I could, but I was young, and she was incredibly good looking and very funny. I did so want to believe everything she told me. She was in the Navy and was stationed nearby. All very hush-hush in those days, though. Couldn’t let on that she was a lesbian. Finally one night, after a particularly romantic evening and rather too much wine, I said yes.”

Sparrow looked at Daphne, who was watching her intently.

“Well it was quite amazing for about four weeks; I fell head over heels in love with her. But then the phone calls and dinner invitations slowed and the flowers stopped altogether. The next thing I knew she was chasing some other young woman, and I was left nursing a broken heart.”

“Damn,” said Daphne softly.

Sparrow nodded. “Damn indeed. I was so cross with myself. I should have known it wasn’t a serious relationship for her, but…well, you do rather hope, don’t you?”

Bored with the birds, Callie strolled back over and leapt nimbly onto the sofa between the two women.

Daphne gave the cat a gentle scratch. “So what happened next? Did you meet someone else?”

Embroidery forgotten, Sparrow looked into the distance as she remembered. “Well, you never think you are going to recover from your first love, do you? But several years later I fell in love with the most wonderful woman, and the two of us had such a life together. We travelled the world and saw things I’ll never forget. Over twenty years together; then one day, out of the blue, she comes home and says she’s leaving. No ifs, buts or maybes. Despite me begging her, she refused to tell me why, and I never found out the reason.” Sparrow looked across and saw the shock on Daphne’s face. “She had been quite ill several months before, and I often suspected that she might have discovered she had a terminal illness and couldn’t bring herself to tell me. After she left, despite all our efforts, neither I nor any of her friends were able to find her. In the end, I just stopped looking.”

Daphne released a breath. “How the hell did you cope?”

Sparrow smiled sadly. “I nearly went crazy wondering if it was something I had done; I didn’t think I’d ever be the same again.” Taking up her embroidery once more, Sparrow continued, “Still, one thing I have learnt is that no matter how much you might not want it to, life goes on. So, after three years of feeling sorry for myself, I picked myself up, dusted myself off and decided I had better get back into life. My friends, of course, wanted me go out and try to meet other women, but it was all a bit silly. I was too old to go through all that dating routine again, and I wasn’t meeting anyone who I felt even remotely attracted to anyway, so after several failed attempts, I just stopped accepting invitations.” Sparrow grimaced as she remembered the many awkward encounters. “I spent the next fifteen years alone. Not unhappy, but…” she paused, looking directly at Daphne, “not alive, not like I feel here. It was as if I was just…going through the motions. Now, when I look back, I don’t recognise that me. She feels like someone else. Does that make sense?”

Daphne nodded thoughtfully. “Absolutely. I’ve always thought that there’s something about OWL’s that allows you to rediscover your spirit. I think it happens to all the women when they first arrive. It’s the magic of being surrounded by a community of lesbians. It’s okay to let down the guard rails of our emotions, because finally, we’re safe. No-one is going to be offended by what we do or say, no-one is going to be titillated by our affection. We are surrounded by our people, women who love women. Why wouldn’t our spirits soar?”

As they gazed at each other intently, Sparrow felt goosebumps brush her skin.

Callie stood, bumping her head against Daphne’s hand.

Blinking, Daphne stood abruptly and looked at her watch. “Heavens, I should go. I have to call in on some friends…organise a fishing trip,” she stammered.

Perplexed by the sudden change in Daphne’s demeanour, Sparrow rose too.

Daphne gazed at her shyly. “Thank you for sharing your story with me. You’re an incredibly brave woman.”

Sparrow shook her head at the compliment. “I’m just glad I’m here now,” she admitted as Daphne turned to leave.

Daphne stopped, looked back and gave Sparrow a sweet smile. “So am I.”