The next day, Friday, was one of those unusually hot, gorgeous, sunny afternoons in London when the city’s workforce pray their boss will let them leave work a bit earlier than usual. Luckily for the production team of The Bradley Mackintosh Show, their boss wasn’t around to enforce, allow or veto anything. So the majority of the office had decamped to the pub by four. Their early arrival at The Boaters by the river in Hammersmith meant they’d nabbed some outside tables and the weekend was getting off to a great start.
‘On days like this,’ Isy said thoughtfully, looking so relaxed that unless you’d spotted her mouth moving you’d be forgiven for thinking she was asleep … or dead, ‘you can understand why London’s got so much going for it in terms of culture.’
‘What are you on about?’ said Natasha, pulling down the straps on her vest top as she basked in the afternoon rays, face turned to the sun.
‘Well,’ said Isy, ‘if it was hot like this all the time, then nobody would ever feel like doing anything, you know? Whereas when it’s cold and raining you can’t avoid thinking, can you? Your brain doesn’t melt and you can be arsed. I mean, right now, I feel like a hot, lazy, fat sloth, who wants to sleep in a tree and drink beer.’
‘Do sloths drink beer?’ asked Luke, managing to ignore the fact it was baking hot by continuing to dress the same way he did all year round, in black jeans, a white shirt, a mod-style, single-breasted grey jacket and a black trilby. Thankfully he wore this trademark combination completely unselfconsciously so looked good, as opposed to like he was trying too hard.
‘Dunno,’ said Isy, closing her eyes and drifting off into a sun-induced stupor. ‘But I’m a sloth for sure and I love beer.’ Then, in an action that somewhat startled the rest of the group, she flung herself forward, her plan being to rest her head on the small, round aluminium table that they were all crowded around outside the pub. ‘Fuck,’ she said as head and table made contact, instantly hurling herself back again while clutching her head and pissing herself laughing, all at the same time. ‘Flipping table’s boiling. I’ve burnt my forehead.’
‘Doofus,’ said Luke, lighting a cigarette before offering the packet around.
Vanessa and Paul accepted one immediately, but Kerry hesitated. ‘God, I’d love one to wash down this spritzer, but I’ve been so good …’
‘Oh, don’t,’ beseeched Jessica quietly. She was perched next to Kerry and up until now had been happy just to sit and listen to the group’s banter. ‘You’ll regret it later if you do, you really will.’
Natasha sneaked a look at Vanessa, but Vanessa – who genuinely liked the new girl – refused to be drawn in.
‘If you’re a sloth then, Isy, what sort of animal am I?’ asked Luke, dragging deeply from his cigarette.
‘Koala,’ she answered like a shot, while rubbing her forehead. ‘Natasha’s a wolf, Vanessa’s a lizard and Paul’s a bear, a grizzly one.’
‘Freak,’ said Paul good-naturedly. ‘Hang on, what about Kerry?’
‘Dog,’ said Luke. Kerry kicked him hard under the table.
‘She’s not a dog,’ said Isy indignantly, as if Luke had just uttered the most nonsensical thing she’d ever heard in her life. ‘She’s a woolly mammoth.’
‘Give me strength,’ said Kerry, not really perturbed at all. The sun had zapped any real strength of feeling about anything.
Meanwhile, Paul was in a great mood. Yesterday’s show had gone brilliantly and had managed to run completely smoothly without Mike’s presence. He knew it was wrong to take such a delight in this but he couldn’t help his feelings towards the man. When you’d worked as hard as he had to get to where he was in life, it was somewhat galling to work for someone who, as far as Paul was concerned, had had less of a helping hand up, and more of an arm and a leg.
He supped his cold pint, considering whether or not to cash in on his great mood and ask Natasha for a date. She’d been her usual self this week, a bundle of increasingly mixed messages, but unless he put himself on the line he’d never find out for sure if she regretted ending things between them. She was complicated, but then, wasn’t everybody? He knew his best friend and flatmate Luke would disapprove, but Natasha was gorgeous and, as far as he was concerned, unfinished business. What was the worst that could happen? She could say no … actually, that would be pretty dreadful now he came to think about it.
He looked across the table. Kerry and Luke were deep in conversation so the new girl had been left to her own devices. Yesterday she’d turned out to be a bit of a revelation, so unfazed was she by the celebs. At the time he hadn’t known whether her direct approach with Kate Templeton was incredibly brave or incredibly stupid, but it had worked out, so he guessed she’d played it just right. Jessica was very pretty too. Not quite as pretty as Natasha and yet there was something about her he was drawn to. He probably shouldn’t have been so quick to dismiss her as a Californian airhead. She definitely had things to say for herself.
‘All right?’ he said now, and quite sweetly she blushed. They should ease off her a bit. He knew she was intimidated by him and Luke so it wasn’t really fair to tease her so much. ‘So did you enjoy yesterday? You looked like you did.’
‘Yeah, it was really great, thanks,’ replied Jessica, pleased to have been asked. She meant what she’d said too. Being a part of yesterday’s organized chaos had been a real buzz.
‘I must say, your approach on how to treat celebrities surprised me, though to your credit I’d say you helped prevent a three-act opera unfolding there. I think being spoken to so logically was quite the novelty for Kate Templeton.’
‘I know,’ agreed Jessica. ‘It’s kinda sad when you think about it, because she seems pretty down to earth.’
‘I still say you were lucky,’ said Kerry, butting in. ‘Like I said before, if that had been someone less reasonable you could have ended up with egg on your face.’
‘Sure,’ agreed Jessica, ‘but Kate’s awesome so I don’t know why anyone would be intimidated by her.’
Natasha narrowed her eyes. ‘And I don’t know why you wouldn’t be.’
‘I know what you mean, Tash,’ said Kerry thoughtfully.
Jessica looked away. She’d have to be careful. For her to continue being a ‘normal’ girl, an experiment she felt like she was finally starting to get to grips with, even to enjoy, it was essential her identity remained a secret. She could only imagine the fuss the truth would cause and she was enjoying being taken at face value for a change.
‘Who did you sound like when you said “awesome”?’ mused Vanessa in her strong Scouse accent.
Jessica frowned. She desperately wanted to decipher what Vanessa had just said, but it was no good – her accent was just too pronounced. All she could make out was a load of ‘k’s and other guttural sounds emanating from the back of her throat. She may as well have been speaking Urdu.
‘I beg your pardon?’ she asked hesitantly. Asking Vanessa to repeat everything was starting to get embarrassing.
‘I said, who do you sound like when you say “awesome”?’ repeated Vanessa slowly.
Jessica started to sweat. ‘Sorry?’
‘WHO DO YOU SOUND LIKE WHEN YOU SAY “AWESOME”?’
No. Still no clue, but she couldn’t face asking her to repeat it again so took a gamble. ‘Er, yeah, I guess,’ she tried hopefully. To her horror, Vanessa looked perplexed. Paul chuckled.
‘She sounds like Britney Spears or someone,’ Kerry suggested helpfully. ‘That’s who you sound like when you say “awesome”.’
‘Oh, right,’ Jessica said, wondering if that was a good thing or a bad thing, and whether she would ever be able to understand the nuances of her workmates’ banter. Still, at least she’d figured out that their constant bickering wasn’t meant in an aggressive way.
She looked at Paul. She had yet to have a conversation with him where she didn’t feel like she was being assessed, but he was certainly charismatic and very clever. In fact, she found herself gravitating towards him more and more. There was something about him that … fascinated her and when he smiled his eyes crinkled up in such a sexy way. In fact, she’d found herself constantly striving to say something he found interesting or entertaining for one of these smiles alone. She could certainly tell why so many of the girls in the office liked him. Vanessa blatantly had a soft spot for him and she suspected Natasha had him on her radar too, though it was hard to know for sure. Still, Jessica had already decided there was no point fancying him herself. He would be far too much like hard work. Plus there would be no point, given that a fling with him could never amount to more than a holiday romance. Though she would love to know if his legs looked as strong as they appeared through his jeans and when he’d leaned over to get something yesterday she’d caught a glimpse of an eye-wateringly flat, muscular stomach.
Jessica gave herself a little shake, blaming the sunshine for making her mind and indeed her libido run away with itself, refusing to consider that she’d never had the same problem at home in LA, where it was sunny every single day …
‘I’m going to get another round,’ said Paul, standing up. ‘Let me buy you a pint, Jessica. Watching you drink fizzy water makes me nervous. It doesn’t seem right on a day like this.’
She laughed. ‘Thanks, but remember I said I don’t drink beer.’
‘You’ve said lots of things,’ he replied. ‘Most of them nuts, but it’s been five whole days now, so it’s high time you got to grips with our culture, which means drinking beer.’
‘I’d rather not,’ she said, feeling bullied. ‘I’m going for a run in a minute so I’ll stick to water, thanks.’
‘You’re going for a run now?’ exclaimed Isy, her jaw slack with amazement.
‘Yeah, actually I’m going to run home, because I couldn’t go for one yesterday, it being show day.’
‘Wow,’ said Isy loudly, looking as deeply impressed as if Jessica had just told her she’d won gold at the Olympics or climbed Everest in her lunch break.
Luke half choked on a mouthful of lager. ‘You’re bloody priceless, Bender. You’re going to run home? To Hampstead?’
‘Um, well, actually just into town to … meet my aunt,’ Jessica improvised, not that she saw what was so funny about her running anywhere. She just didn’t want them to find out that home, until tomorrow, was still a hotel. She looked down at her trainers, suddenly feeling very tired. It was exhausting having to have your wits about you the whole while. It was time to go. She needed to pack up her stuff to take to Pam’s tomorrow and she wanted to phone Dulcie too, who seemed to have disappeared off the radar the last couple of days.
‘Well, if you’re still here in the winter, let’s see if you’re quite so keen to get your running shoes on then, shall we?’ said Vanessa.
‘Do you think you will be?’ asked Paul, suddenly curious to know.
‘What’s that?’ asked Jessica, who was still trying to work out what Vanessa had just said.
‘Here in the winter.’
‘I hope so,’ replied Jessica politely. ‘I like London, it’s a nice break from –’
‘Sunshine?’ said Luke.
‘Beaches?’ suggested Julian from the next table.
‘Beautiful people?’ offered Vanessa.
‘What do you actually do in LA anyway?’ asked Natasha, who was still busy sun-worshipping, though the sun was just about to disappear behind a cloud. ‘Who do you live with?’
‘My dad and my stepmom,’ Jessica replied, gathering up her backpack and wriggling into it. Definitely time to go.
‘So where’s your mum?’
‘She left when I was three.’
Natasha didn’t react but it was obviously an uncomfortable moment and everyone knew she’d be feeling bad for asking one question too many.
Paul felt a sudden rush of sympathy for Jessica and empathy too. Maybe they weren’t so different after all. He watched her now as she bent down to make sure her laces were tied properly on her trainers. Then she took a hair band from the pocket of her denim shorts and tied her fine blonde hair back.
‘What are you up to this weekend? Are you going to be all right?’ Kerry asked, genuinely concerned. She got the sense that Jessica didn’t do much with her spare time, apart from hang out with her aunt.
‘Not sure yet,’ replied Jessica, who was actually looking forward to a couple of peaceful days to digest everything. ‘I’ll probably water Mike’s garden at some point and, you know, bits and pieces.’
Kerry, who couldn’t comprehend anybody having anything less than a hectic social life, felt a pang of something approaching pity. ‘OK, well, I’m off to a spa this weekend but next week some of us are going clubbing so you should come. Don’t feel you have to or anything, it’s just that seeing as you said you liked music so much …’
‘Do you?’ said Paul, who was a music nut.
‘That sounds great,’ said Jessica, deliberately pretending not to hear Paul. The last thing she felt like right now was being grilled on her musical tastes. ‘It would be great to check out an English club.’
‘I can’t believe you’ve only just mentioned that you’re going to a spa,’ interrupted Vanessa enviously. ‘You’re such a cow, Kerry, I’d bloody love to go to one of those.’
‘Me too,’ said Isy, draining the last of her Bacardi Breezer. ‘I’d have my claws cut and my paws rubbed.’
‘Yeah, well, I am looking forward to a bit of pampering,’ said Kerry, who having worked with Isy so long was oblivious to her strange turn of phrase, ‘but I’m going for a family friend’s hen night. To be honest, I’m slightly dreading all the wedding chatter,’ she finished rather tellingly. Kerry was only thirty-four, but Jessica could sense she felt ready to meet Mr Right.
‘What’s everybody else up to?’
‘Sleeping,’ said Isy.
‘Clubbing,’ said Luke.
‘This and that,’ said Natasha, stealing a glance at Paul in a way that made Jessica feel inappropriately bothered. ‘What about you, Pauly? You going home to see Mummy?’
Paul didn’t rise to the bait. He had his reasons for going home to his mum’s house in Staines as often as he did, but they weren’t ones he felt particularly comfortable talking about. Even when he’d been going out with Natasha he hadn’t opened up to her much about his life. Luke was the only person at work he trusted completely, and trust was something Paul valued greatly.
Kerry looked at Jessica, who was hovering, backpack firmly on, clearly waiting for a gap in the conversation to say goodbye. ‘OK, hon – well, have a good one and don’t worry too much about Mike’s bloody garden, will you? I’ll see you on Monday at ten and thank you so much for all your hard work. It’s been brilliant having you here this week.’
Jessica swelled with pride. ‘See you then,’ she said before giving a little wave and setting off at a fairly energetic pace down the path.
Everybody stared after her, fascinated by what was largely considered to be fairly dubious behaviour. Why would anybody in their right mind want to run anywhere on a day like this, especially when there was cold lager to be drunk?
‘Run, Forrest!’ yelled Luke suddenly at the top of his voice, ‘Run!’, which made everyone giggle like mad, including Jessica. Now a large speck in the distance, she turned round briefly to wave over her shoulder again.
As they all watched her disappear down the path, Natasha was the first to speak. ‘Do you think she’ll go round the corner and get the bus? I bet she does.’
‘I bet she doesn’t’ said Isy, who was still looking completely awestruck. ‘She’s amazing. If she was an animal, she’d be a gazelle.’
‘A gazelle with slightly thick ankles,’ retorted Natasha nastily, and at that moment Paul wondered if he really did still want to take Natasha out.