The images I’d conjured of an actual prison cell were nothing like what I found Mack in. The cot bed and plain chair gave it more of a mental hospital feeling than a jail. The restroom was down the hall. According to the guard, that was the only time Mack would leave his holding cell. The door was shut, but through the rectangular glass window, I got a clear view of Mack as we approached.
My stomach clenched. With his spiky hair turned into a shaggy mess and no glasses, I hardly recognized him. He leaned against the wall, where the headboard would’ve been if the bed had a frame. He didn’t notice us until Blake opened the door, glancing first at Blake and then me.
His eyes widened and he jumped to his feet, running his hands up and down his face before putting his glasses back on. In that moment, I had to resist the urge to make a spectacle of myself. I wanted to hurl myself past Blake and throw my arms around Mack. Everything about this felt wrong. His eyes widened even further as I drew close.
“What are you doing here?” he asked. I tried to ignore the frown he shot at Blake. “I told you I didn’t want her to come here.”
Blake shrugged. “I don’t think anyone can tell Sam what to do. She wanted to see you.” To my surprise, Blake gave my shoulder a squeeze. “Hey, I’ll be right outside the door when you’re done, okay?”
“Okay, thanks,” I said, surprised he seemed to know what I needed right then. I turned to Mack as the door clicked behind Blake. We were alone. Maybe now he’ll stop frowning.
Instead, Mack sat back down on his bed, his face contorting into a grimace. It was so unlike the Mack I knew.
“Hey, I’ve come all this way to see you and this is how you treat me?” I asked, trying to make light of the situation.
As soon as I sat down next to him, I could feel him tense. I reached over and touched his shoulder. “Mack, hey, it’s me here. What’s wrong?”
He grunted. “What’s wrong? You shouldn’t be here. I don’t deserve you coming to see me. I don’t deserve Blake letting you.” “Well, Blake doesn’t get to say what I do or don’t do,” I said, annoyed Mack was under the impression he did. I ignored the fact he’d refused to let me see Jaxon. That’s different…
“Of course I’m going to come see you. You’re being ridiculous staying in here in the first place. No one’s keeping you here.”
“That doesn’t matter, Sammy.”
I let the name slide. Mack had been calling me that for so long, I wondered if he even noticed the difference anymore.
“I need to serve my time. I committed crimes. Against the islands, against Tonbo and Blake, and most importantly, against you.” His voice softened a bit with the last statement. He cleared his throat. “I will do whatever Tonbo decides.”
“But he already decided that you’re free to go. The door’s not even locked.”
He glanced away from me and shook his head.
“Mack.” I squeezed his shoulder. “It’s time to come home. I mean, what do your parents think? Don’t they miss you?”
“They think Tonbo’s training me for something,” he answered, his shoulder’s slumping. “That’s what Tonbo told them when they called him to find out where I went.”
“Oh. Well, that’s good.”
“No, it’s not. No one should be doing me favors. I’m the monster. Remember, Samantha?”
Back to Samantha again. “No, you’re not. I am. I’m Sammy, and Sammy’s me. In some freaky way, I’m my own monster. So stop moping around here. I need you,” I blurted.
Mack glanced over at me.
I hesitated, and then let it all out. “It’s not the same without you back home… I need my best friend back. My parents have me going to this creepy psychologist, trying to figure out Sammy, but you know her better than anyone else does. You’re the one I should be talking to, not some doctor. I’m scared to death of her coming back. I don’t know how to do this alone; I need your help.”
I hadn’t realized how much I needed Mack in my life until that exact moment. My words were a revelation. Mack’s eyebrows lifted, the scowl disappearing.
“I’m so sorry, Sammy-er-Samantha,” he stammered.
“It’s okay, Mack. I’m used to you calling me Sammy. I’m good with it, really.”
“No, I shouldn’t call you that.” He sighed. “You deserve better, Samantha. I guess I thought staying here was the best thing for you. I mean, I’m just a reminder of all the horrible things in your life.”
“That’s not true, Mack. Sure, I don’t like to think about what happened, but Sammy could still be in my life right now. That doesn’t change if you disappear on me.”
“I guess I didn’t think about that.” He gazed back at me. “I just want to do whatever helps you.”
“Then come home,” I said, nudging his shoulder with mine.
He gave me half a smile. “Will that help, Sam…” He flushed before finishing, “—ster?”
I cocked an eyebrow at him. “Samster? That’s what you’re going to call me now?”
It made me happy to see Mack’s face split into a real smile this time. “What? It’s like hamster but with—”
“No way. I’d rather you call me Sammy.”
“Hamsters are cute,” he said, pretending to argue.
“Hamsters bite,” I reminded him.
“True, but I’m pretty sure Sammy didn’t add hamster DNA to your blend, so I’m not worried.”
I slugged his shoulder, glad to have an excuse to laugh at the crud in my life.
He pulled my hand free from his shoulder. “Geez, your blend sure makes you punch hard, though.”
“Oh whatever,” I said, realizing he had yet to let go of my hand. I knew I wasn’t in love with Mack, but there was a part of me that still longed for his closeness. Was it proof that Sammy was still in there somewhere? Or just the fact that Mack had been my first and only true friend for many, many years? Knowing Blake waited outside the door, I stood up and used our clasped hands to pull Mack to his feet.
“Alright, no more excuses. You’re coming back with us.”
Mack let my fingers go. “Like I said, the only reason I am is to help you.”
“Fine. Sounds good to me.” We made our way across the room, but before we opened the door, I glanced over at him. “You know, you’re going to have to forgive yourself one day.”
He didn’t look at me, and I could sense he wanted to argue with me that it would never happen. I slipped my hand back into his. He shot a glance at me.
“I’ve forgiven you, Mack. We managed to be best friends with Sammy stuck in the middle of us before. Maybe we can again.”
He rubbed the back of his neck with his free hand. “Sammy underestimated you—always thinking you were the one who needed saving. I think she had it backward.”
I stared after Mack as he opened the door. Although the slump was gone from his shoulders, his stride still wasn’t the confident one I knew. That was because there was one more person to face. Blake.
I couldn’t help but think about what he’d said. Was I really stronger than Sammy had given me credit for? In the caves with Jaxon, I’d felt something claw at me, wanting to take over. It was the closest thing I had to knowing what Sammy felt like. That feeling had stuck with me ever since. I hadn’t let her win that day. Did that make Sammy angry? Or did it make her go away forever?
My internal struggle was interrupted by Blake sizing Mack up and saying, “If there’s anything you should tell me, anything you haven’t already, do it now, Mack.”
Mack didn’t hesitate. “There’s nothing, I swear.”
“Alright,” Blake said, capping Mack’s shoulder with his hand. “Let’s get out of here and get some food. I’m starving.”
I stared as the guys fell easily back into teasing one another, with Blake telling Mack he looked like a skinny girl with long hair. As I followed, I wondered if it could really be that simple with guys. I shrugged it off on the way back to Tonbo’s office. Blake’s seeming ease with Mack was a huge relief. Maybe things can get back to normal. Well, as normal as things get for me.