I grabbed the grimoire, went to the bathroom, threw some baby powder in the air and said, “Soundproof the bitch while I scratch an itch. Bend to my will.”
As the dust stirred around me, blocking sound from leaving the four walls around me, I screamed as loud as I could for about thirty seconds. After, I sat on the throne, grim in my lap. If there was ever a time that I needed guidance from this book, it was now.
“Okay, give it to me straight.” I pressed my palm against the book, unable to feel embossed symbols because my hands were made of magical glue. “I need your guidance, and I need you to be a lot clearer about how to fix my shit.”
I held my breath as I flipped the book open. Where the prior message had been, a new one appeared.
Blood of my blood, daughter of bright and fade.
Heart of my heart, there is a price to be paid.
Bone to earth, blood to fire, with every element the price is higher.
Only fools refuse to use their tools.
Overcome your fear, or you will disappear.
Goddess, help you.
Well, that was a bust. “Thanks, Grimoire.” For nothing. If I wanted to be called a fool, I’d talk to Linda. All that was missing was having a rock thrown at my head. On top of that, the book hadn’t told me a single thing I didn’t already know.
I got up and splashed water on my face, combed my hair, and prepared myself for when my brother and my other sisters arrived. If I wanted this to work, I had to project confidence. I had to be confident. I’d learned quickly that part of spellcraft was believing. I had to find a way to believe I could do this.
“I will protect the pixies. I will defeat Bogmall. I will master aero-craft.” I repeated the three sentences like a mantra. But first, I had to turn my family into my very own coven. Joy.
A soft knock startled me. “Iris, they’re here,” Keir said.
I opened the bathroom door, breaking the silence spell. “I’m ready.”
“You can do this.” He placed his hands on my shoulders. “I have faith in you.”
“That wasn’t the tune you were singing this morning.”
“This morning, I was mad at you for dying.”
“And now?”
“And now, I just want to support you however you need me. That’s my purpose. I don’t determine the outcome of your life. Your tru-craft is your journey. I’m just happily along for the ride.”
“I don’t want this to be my journey. I want it to be ours. Doing this alone would suck.”
“I am and will always be by your side. But today, I let my fear of losing you override what you needed from me.”
I peered up at him. “Did you rob a Xanax factory? You’re being awfully chill.” He’d left earlier without saying anything to me. “Where did you go today?”
He smiled. “I have an altar at the top of the mountain. I went up to ask the goddess for clarity.”
“And did she give you the answers you wanted?”
His gray eyes softened as he met my gaze. “She’s never actually spoken to me, but the meditation helped center me. I was so focused on the possibility of a future without you that I forgot what was important.”
“And what’s that?”
“It’s the here and now. The present. And I’m determined to be present with you, Iris.”
I smiled at him as some of the tension I’d been holding released. I hadn’t realized how much his anger had affected me. “Then let’s be present together.”
He kissed me. “Do you know what you need for the spell?”
“I think so. But I’m not sure I have everything I need.” It was going on six o’clock. “What we can’t get from the store, the gnomes and the pixies might be able to help with.”
I went into the living room. Dahlia, looking decidedly nervous and uncomfortable, sat on a chair with her knees pressed together. Rowan and Rose were on the sofa, and Marigold was pacing back and forth. Luanne leaned against the wall taking in the scene with the interest of a painter studying a muse. She had a slight smirk on her face that told me she was enjoying this way too much. The woman did love a little chaos. I wondered if Rose and she had gotten a chance to have a private word. From the way Rose was avoiding looking at Lu, I was guessing the answer was no.
“What’s this about, Iris?” Dahlia asked. “Rose said you needed us here right away.” Her gaze drifted to my neck and arms, and she blanched. “Is that normal? I mean, for your condition?”
Leave it to my oldest sister to try and give my wild magic a diagnosis. “Being a witch isn’t a condition,” I said. “But, no, this isn’t normal.”
Rowan got to his feet. “Let me take a look,” he said. He grasped my arm gingerly, moving it around. Flecks of dust clouded around the appendage.
“You can’t diagnose me either,” I told him. “I wish there was a physical or psychological reason this was happening to me, but there’s not. This is metaphysical, and it’s something I’m going to have to figure out.” I took my arm back.
“Then why did you call us?” Rose asked. “I mean if you don’t need us.” She sounded angry and hurt. I guess she’d had time to digest that I’d been keeping secrets from her, and she had decided she was going to be butt-hurt about it. Which was totally fair, but I needed her over it for a moment.
“Rose, I understand you feel a bit blindsided—”
“A bit? You’ve been lying to me, Iris. For months! Marigold told us what you’ve been going through, and I can’t believe you didn’t trust us enough to let us in.”
Was she hurt that I kept tru-craft a secret from her? No doubt. However, I think it hurt her more that Marigold knew before her. Great. Our baby sister was jealous.
“I’m sorry,” I told her. “Everything has been a complete mess since my tru-craft sparked. I’ve had magic and multiple magical creatures trying to kill me, and I’ve struggled to accept that this is my world now. I’m constantly worried about Michael and you all becoming collateral damage in my shitshow of a life. I thought keeping it from you would somehow keep you guys safe. Honestly, I’m still not sure if telling you was the right thing.”
“But Marigold was allowed to know.”
“Marigold was in the wrong place at the right time.” I crossed the living room and sat down on the far side of the couch. “If it’s any consolation, she didn’t take it well.”
“When your sister turns her hands into flamethrowers, it’s a little unsettling,” Marigold said in her defense.
“The point is, I had planned to tell all of you after I told Michael.”
“Michael knows.” Rose’s eyes were big as saucers.
“Yes, because he’s my kid, so this can affect him. He needs to be more prepared than I was.” Holy emotional blackmail. Rose was really sticking it to me. “He needed to know,” I implored her. “Can you just let it go? I love you, and I need your help, but if you can’t get on board, then I’ll have to find someone else to take your place.”
Dahlia stood up. “We all agreed we’d support Iris.”
Rose sniffled, then nodded. “I’m in,” she said grudgingly.
Rowan said, “Me too.”
Marigold nodded as well. “I was the one who called all of you, so you know where I stand.”
“Great, with you four, along with Keir and Luanne, I have the six I need to make this spell work.”
“And what spell are we making work?” Dahlia asked. I was beginning to think my sister was actually getting into the idea that I could be a real witch.
“I need to cast a spell to protect a troupe of pixies.” Bob came into the living room and rubbed his face against my leg. I picked him up. Even with numb arms, holding Bob soothed me. “I’ll need the six of you to act as compass points, lending me your strength while I craft the silence barrier.”
“You know that every time you say pixies, it sounds ridiculous,” Rowan said. “It makes it harder to buy into all this magical mumbo-jumbo.”
Luanne snorted a laugh. “Then maybe you should meet them.”
“They’re real,” Marigold said emphatically. “They’re cute but aggressive.”
That sounded about right. “You guys give me a minute to talk to Linda, then come out to the garden.” I needed Linda to know that none of this was possible without her, even if she couldn’t be part of my coven. I loved and trusted her as much as I did my siblings.
Keir walked with me to the door. “Give me a signal. I’ll bring your family out.”
I pressed my forehead to his. “Thanks.”
Linda and Morlan were out by the bench, and Fair Konig was standing next to them. The donsy of gnomes had made the garden almost good as new, and the pixie troupe had finished mending the fence. I whistled. “You guys do good work together.”
“We are at peace,” Linda said. “Your burden is my burden. I am sorry for threatening to leave you.”
“Nope,” I told her. “No need to apologize. Childhood trauma can really mess with your head. We’re all okay then?”
Fair Konig fluttered his wings. “We are once again friends to the Lupesabeinfeltchner donsy, and we look forward to many years of kinship.”
“Excellent.” I rubbed my hands together. “Linda, you know I love you, right?”
“Stupid, Kleinkind,” she muttered as her cheeks turned red, but I could tell she was pleased. “Don’t try to butter me up, as they say. Just come out with it.”
“You can’t be a part of the spell that I have to cast. I need my brother and sisters, and if they are in the mix….”
She raised a hand. “I understand.”
I gave her a smile. “You’ll always be a part of my coven, though. You’re my family, Linda. Just like everyone in that house.”
I saw Zev out by the gate, patrolling the perimeter. He gave me a quick wave. He wasn’t family yet, but he had definitely moved into the friend category. “I do need some help, though. I don’t have the ingredients I need, and I think you guys might be able to find them for me.”
“I will do what I can,” Linda said stoically.
“I need amber. It’s an air stone. From what I’ve read, it has amplifying properties, and it’s good for protection and clarification.”
Linda turned to her husband. “Our donsy can find the amber. How much do you need?”
“I’d like at least seven good chunks of it. A big one is fine as long as it can be broken up.”
“I will get you what you need,” she said. “Anything else?”
“The rest I need the pixies’ help for.”
She and Morlan dove into the grass and disappeared.
Great, one ingredient down. I turned my attention back to the pixie king. “I also need mint for protection and luck.” Because we were going to need all the luck we could get. “I can get that on a grocery run. And finally, I will use a fine powder. Something that will easily hang in the air. This is where you and your troupe can help out. Whatever dust I use, can you and your troupe keep it stirred up once the spell begins? When the powder stops circulating, the spell will end.”
“Yes, we will take shifts agitating the dust to keep the spell active.” His wings hummed with excitement. “Mica powder,” Fair Konig said. “It has strong air properties, and it’s extremely lightweight.”
“Awesome. Do you know where I can find some?”
“I don’t,” he said. “But it’s a common mineral, shiny and flaky. It just needs to be ground into a fine powder.”
I gave him a quick smile. “No worries. I’ll figure it out. My family is going to be acting as my coven for this spell. Can I bring them out to meet you and your troupe?”
“Yes, of course.” He bowed deeply. “It would be my honor.”
“Great.” I turned to the window and signaled to Keir to send out the siblings.
It seemed my haphazard plan was coming together haphazardly. I looked at my hands. One translucent, the other like clay, and I tried to force the doubt from my mind.
As I walked back to the house, I repeated my mantra. “I will protect the pixies. I will defeat Bogmall. I will master aero-craft.”
I had to. The only other options were failure and death.