Hayley entered the living room, her arms folded and her nails digging into her skin, hoping to see Lauren standing there. But it wasn’t Lauren. She had no idea where Hayley’s parents lived. Yet Violet did.
“I heard you were back.”
“Not for long. I’m just home for Christmas.”
Violet nodded. Something had changed about her, and Hayley wasn’t sure if it was Violet or herself. Hayley had always placed Violet on a pedestal. She was the ideal, with long, silky, golden hair, a rosy complexion, and captivating blue eyes. Today she looked dull, even against the glow of the Christmas lights on the tree.
“Why are you here?”
“I came to apologize. And give you this.” Violet handed her an envelope. Violet shrugged, seeming a little self-conscious. She’d unzipped her parka when she’d arrived, and Hayley could see a bump protruding under her sweater.
“You’re pregnant. Kevin’s?”
“Of course it’s Kevin’s. We got married last month.”
“Wow.” Hayley plopped down on the couch but didn’t say anything else. Couldn’t. She was stunned, sure, but it hurt less than she’d expected. What hurt more is that it seemed everyone else was getting their shit together except her.
“Aren’t you going to open it?” Violet took a seat next to her on the couch. “I know I was a gigantic asshole. I just didn’t know what I wanted until it sort of landed in my lap. I’m sorry I hurt you in the process.”
“You’re happy with Kevin?”
“Very. And the store is doing well.” Violet turned away, staring at the lights as they cycled through the different colours. Hayley had always thought they would give someone a seizure one day. “That’s why I wanted to pay you back. I know nothing will make what I did right. And I can’t change the past, but,” she motioned to the envelope Hayley was turning over in her hand, “maybe that will help reset some of the wrongs.” Violet heaved herself up. “You don’t have to open it now.”
Hayley followed Violet to the door, locking it after she left.
“What’s in the envelope?” Hannah was sitting on the stairs behind Hayley.
“Were you listening in?”
Hannah nodded, a big grin on her face. “Yep. So what did she give you? A long, sappy letter about how much she loves Kevin?”
“Ugh. You’re the worst. You know that?”
Hayley ripped open the side of the envelope and peered inside. “Holy shit.”
“What?” Hannah pulled herself up using the banister.
“It’s a cheque for twenty thousand dollars.”
“What?” Hannah grabbed it from Hayley. “She sells cat shit. How is she making that much money? I’ve only ever seen Mrs. Clarke go in.”
“If there’s one thing I’ve learned over the last few months, it’s that people buy weird shit.”
* * *
Lauren settled into a chair across from her dad. “How’s the food?”
“Awful.”
“Of course you’d say that. It’s not takeout.” But Lauren knew her dad better than that. He might have grumbled about moving out of his apartment, but it was all bluster. She’d managed to find him an accommodation in an active living community in the west end, so he wouldn’t be so far from her. It had helped that she had come into a bit of money lately. It meant they didn’t have to wait for his apartment to sell before they could get him a spot.
It still felt surreal. On her way back to George Brown that day, her only wish had been that she’d do better than Dan. The look on his face when she’d been named the winner warmed her heart. The money and prestige were nice too, although it all felt a bit hollow without Hayley there to join in the celebrations. If it hadn’t been for her, she wouldn’t have entered. As stupid as it was, Hayley’s intention had been good.
She’d paid Aaron the money Hayley had given her, but really, Hayley shouldn’t have paid for it. Lauren had more than enough to repay her. And she owed her more than money. For the first time in her adult life she didn’t have to worry about money. The problem now for Lauren was next steps. She had no idea where to go from here. She still had an apartment that was under market value, and Aaron couldn’t kick her out even if she didn’t work at the diner anymore. But it was time to move on. Long past time. She’d been thinking about going back to school like Pete, only instead of doing a course she had no interest in, she would study baking and pastry arts.
Vic was made manager, which made sense. Ramiro had hired a replacement for Hayley, who was, in his words, a shit show. Vic said the new hire was fine, but Ramiro missed Hayley. They all did. She hadn’t been there very long, but she’d affected them all just the same.
“How are your neighbours?” Max didn’t like the loss of independence, which made this place a great fit for him. It wasn’t a home for old people, like he’d worried about. He could come and go, but he was surrounded by people his own age, and staff checked in on him daily. Best of all, in Lauren’s opinion, was the dining hall. He didn’t have to cook for himself, and they weren’t making junk food. It was all healthy.
Lauren hadn’t realized how stressed she was about her dad being on his own until she’d moved him in here. She didn’t have to worry about him the same way. People were looking after him.
“My neighbours? What about them? They’re old.”
“Dad, you’re old. Hate to say it, but it’s true.” She picked up a pamphlet that had been shoved under his door. “They do euchre nights, and there’s a bowling alley. There’s tonnes to do, and you don’t have to even leave the place. They also have a library right here.”
“Okay, okay.” He waved his hand at her to stop. “I already live here. You don’t have to give me the pitch.”
“Just don’t sit here all alone, okay? Hey, look. They have trivia tonight in the bar. It would be a good opportunity to see who all the idiots are.”
He frowned at her, but the gleam in his eyes told her he thought it might not be a bad idea.
Lauren stood. “Why don’t we go grab something for lunch? We can check out all the single ladies.”
“Speaking of ladies,” he said as they made their way down the hall to the dining room. “Where’s the lady who makes all that delicious food?”
Lauren took his arm and continued walking. “Home for Christmas, I imagine.”
“She wasn’t there to watch you win?”
That had been the one down moment of her win. Pete had shown up to cheer her on, and everyone at the diner was waiting to see how it had gone. But the one person she’d wanted to be there was absent.
“I had to fire her from the diner.” They entered the dining hall, which was only half full at one in the afternoon. Lauren imagined most of the residents ate earlier than this.
“I could see how that might put a wrench in things. Did you apologize?”
“Dad, I didn’t have a choice. There was good reason to fire her. While I wouldn’t have if it was my call, it wasn’t. Aaron wanted her fired. I was just doing my job.”
“A job you no longer have.”
“Someone else would’ve done it.”
Max shrugged and walked past Lauren into the hall. He took a seat at an empty table, and Lauren had a sad premonition of the remaining days of his life, always sitting on the outside looking in. She joined him at the table, vowing she wouldn’t let that happen to her.
And the first step in making that happen was to make decisions that made her happy.
* * *
Christmas at the Cavellos’ was the usual chaos. It was the one time of year Hayley loved being home. She loved the noise as her aunts descended on her mother’s kitchen and the inevitable bickering over whose stuffing recipe they were using. She loved the delicious smells that wafted throughout the house, the glow of Christmas lights as her family sat down to play a cutthroat tournament of Uno, and the arguments over whose team was better—the Leafs or the Canadiens. Her Uncle Mitch always won as soon as he brought Stanley Cups into it, citing that half the people in the house hadn’t been born during the last win for the Leafs. Her family was everything to her, but it didn’t mean she had to live near them to be happy.
Hannah went into labour on Christmas Eve. She hadn’t been due until the second of January, but the kid decided to come early. Adalyn Isabel Mathews was born at seven fifteen Christmas morning while three generations of family paced in the waiting room.
When Derek came out to announce that it was a girl, everyone surged, trying to be the first one to see her. They spent the morning and afternoon in shifts. Christmas dinner was moved to Hannah and Derek’s place so Hannah wouldn’t have to get off the couch to celebrate with everyone.
Hayley sat back, watching the chaos, enjoying her family, though she loved that she could leave. She could have them in small doses. She got to enjoy the great things of a small town—that her family was all together and that it was quaint and picturesque. But she needed a different kind of chaos to be happy.
With the money Violet had given her, she could move back to the city and have a little cushion before she found another job. At least this time, she had a better idea of what she was looking for.
* * *
The class was small. Only seven people filled the stations in front of Lauren. She’d chosen one of the smaller private colleges because she liked the intimacy of smaller class sizes. Her breath caught the moment she saw the bright-purple hair in front.
She hadn’t talked to Hayley since the night she left. At first, she was giving her space, and then it seemed too much time had passed. Hayley hadn’t gotten in touch with her so Lauren assumed she wasn’t interested, but a day didn’t go by that she didn’t think about her—wonder what she was doing, imagine what it would be like to bump into her some time, what she would say. Now that Hayley sat in front of her, she couldn’t take her eyes off her, let alone concentrate on what their instructor was saying. It was a good thing it was the first class and they weren’t being evaluated on their technique.
After class, Lauren knelt to grab her things from where she’d stuffed them in her station, and when she stood, Hayley was already gone. Swallowing all her anxiety, Lauren rushed out of the room. She saw a flash of purple turn the corner and followed. It didn’t matter that she had another class in five minutes. Lauren wasn’t letting this opportunity pass her by.
In the three months since she’d won Bake or Die, Lauren had worked hard at putting herself out there. She refused to live on the sidelines anymore.
Hayley crossed Dundas, entering Trinity Bellwoods from the north path. Lauren dodged a Foodora courier and dashed into the park after Hayley. She caught up to her as she knelt petting a bulldog, who was doing his best to lick her face off.
“Aren’t you adorable. Oh yes, you are.” Hayley tilted her head back to stop the pooch from licking her mouth. “You must smell all the pastry I’ve been elbow deep in, huh?” And then her head turned to Lauren, who stood off to the side of the path watching her. Her attention diverted, Hayley fell over onto the path. Now with more access, the bulldog climbed up her torso, attacking her face with a new vigour. Hayley laughed. “Enough.” She pushed him away as the dog’s owner pulled him free.
Lauren helped Hayley up off the ground. She was covered in muddy paw prints and dirt. “Where did you come from?” Hayley asked.
It took Lauren a moment to find her voice. It felt so good to be standing in front of Hayley. “How are you?”
Hayley brushed at the mud, her cheeks pinked. She shrugged. “I’m working at a restaurant downtown. Ramiro knows the chef.”
Lauren picked a dead leaf out of Hayley’s hair and began ripping it to shreds. “Did Ramiro tell you about this class?”
“The pastry class? Yeah. He said my crusts need work so I should get a little help.” Hayley looked behind her. “How did you know I was in a pastry class?”
“I think Ramiro’s been playing matchmaker. I’m enrolled in the pastry-arts course.”
A smile lit up Hayley’s face. “Congrats, by the way. Ramiro told me you’d won. I wish I could’ve been there to see Hipster Dan’s face.”
“It was priceless. Something I’ll cherish for the rest of my life.”
They began walking down the path toward the diner. “Good. The asshole deserved to be handed his ass.”
“Well, it was better than that. He’s been disqualified from ever entering again because apparently he stole his idea from someone else.”
Hayley’s surprise was feigned. “No kidding.”
“And this time they had proof.”
Spring was just starting to make itself known. There were more and more mild days. All the snow had melted, although they probably had one more storm in their future. The end of March and early April usually featured at least one. The overcast sky belied the balmy weather they were having.
Lauren loved this time of year, when everything came back to life. With the hibernation over, the park filled with dogs and squirrels. The birds sang louder, and the sidewalks and streets were free of slush.
They meandered along the path, not sure where they were heading or caring.
“I’ve been meaning to say something for a long time.” Lauren pulled Hayley over to one of the benches off the path. “I should’ve said it, but I was too scared.”
Hayley took a seat on the bench next to Lauren, her azure eyes bright. She pulled out a bag of trail mix and offered some to Lauren, who shook her head. She was too nervous to eat.
“I shouldn’t have fired you.”
“No. That was exactly what you should’ve done. I stole money.” Hayley picked out a raisin and threw it on the ground. “Is that what you wanted to say?”
Lauren shook her head. “The biggest regret I’ve had in the last—hell, probably ever—was letting you walk out of my life without saying I love you.”
A white squirrel jumped up onto the end of the bench, a raisin between its paws. Hayley stared at it, frozen in shock and warmth and excitement. The squirrel swished its tail a few times, then hopped off the bench in search of more food. Hayley returned her attention to the beautiful woman sitting across from her. If anything, she looked better than Hayley remembered. Her dark bangs hung above her soft brown eyes, catching the light in such a way that they almost appeared golden. Her red lips seemed more so next to her pale skin.
Hayley didn’t doubt that she’d made a huge mistake leaving. She’d run from Casper Falls and the whole humiliating mess with Violet, but she was done with that. She leaned into Lauren for the softest of kisses. “My biggest regret is leaving you without telling you how much I love you.”
Lauren smiled. “You can’t have the same regret.”
“No? How about this? My biggest regret will be you not accepting my dinner invitation.”
Lauren grasped Hayley’s cheeks and pulled her close. “We wouldn’t want to make any more regrets, would we?” When they kissed this time, the park and everyone in it fell away. Hayley’s grip had loosened, and her bag of trail mix fell to the ground.
The white squirrel, who had been biding its time off to the side, scurried up and began shoving nuts into its mouth as fast as it could. Above, two women sat oblivious to everything in the world except each other.