part0039

Probably the damn dog again, he thought as he tried to force his mind into a more alert state. Opening his eyes, he saw a blurry outline just a few inches from his face.

Sam tried to roll over and go back to sleep, but discovered that he couldn’t, as Gordon had apparently decided to drape a paw over him and the dog was too heavy to move. He shrugged to himself and was about to go back to sleep when his mind finally caught up.

Forcing his eyes open once more, Sam rubbed at them a few times to clear up his vision. Emma’s face came into view, just inches from his, and Sam felt his heart leap up into his throat.

It was then that he noticed that the dog foot he’d thought had been draped over him, was a human one. Emma was curled into his side, with one arm draped over his chest, and one of her legs pulled up onto him.

Sam let out a low groan and thought about waking her, but when he checked his clock and saw that it was only five in the morning, he quickly changed his mind.

Besides, what did he care if a hot girl wanted to cozy up to him, even if she was a little weird?

So, closing his eyes once more, Sam allowed himself to drift back into sleep.

He awoke a few hours later when a ray of sunlight hit him directly in the face.

“Fucking sun, go away,” he groaned, draping an arm across his eyes and trying to block it out.

“Aww, you’re so cute when you’re all grumpy.”

Sam nearly jumped out of his skin when Emma’s voice sounded just inches away from his ear. It was so close, in fact, that he could feel her breath tickling over him as she spoke.

“I know that you seem to have no boundaries,” Sam said, still keeping his arm over his eyes. “But I feel like this is getting to be a little too much.”

He heard Emma laugh, then felt her swat him lightly in the chest.

“You say that, but your little friend doesn’t seem to mind my company.”

Sam sat bolt upright, hands flying to cover himself as Emma laughed. It took him a few seconds to realize that he had not, as Emma had implied, been pitching a tent. He glared at her, but she just continued laughing unashamedly.

“You do know what sexual harassment is, right?” he asked sullenly.

“I do, and if I thought you minded my attention in the least, I’d leave you alone.”

Sam rolled his eyes and turned away from her as he got his knees under him. His back felt sore and his body was completely cramped up from a night spent sleeping on the ground. Arching his back, Sam heard a few satisfying cracks, then got his feet under him and moved to rise. It was only then that he remembered who was standing behind him, and by then, it was too late. Even as Sam was breathing a sigh of resignation, he felt the hard slap on his behind. To his credit, he just ignored it, straightening to his full height and turning to face Emma, who had an innocent look on her face.

Shaking his head, Sam held a hand out to help her up, which Emma graciously took and used to haul herself to her feet. Emma dusted herself off, then walked over to the stream running by the camp to wash her face and fix her hair.

Sam looked around then, noting the absence of his canine companion. Looking up into the trees, he noticed that Baron Von Tweet was missing as well.

“Do you know where Gordon and Barry went?” he asked, approaching the stream and bending down to wash his own face and get a drink.

“Yeah,” she said, wetting her hands and running them slowly through her silky black hair. “I sent them both to scout out the city and see if they can get eyes on our targets. As far as I can see, we have three at the moment: Sirus, Aoife, and the elf.”

Sam noted that Emma had avoided saying Milly’s name, which he was quite grateful for. He really hadn’t known her long, but he’d been convinced that she’d genuinely liked him. From past experience, he knew that it would take a least a few days for him to get over her.

“Sounds about right,” Sam nodded. “But that’s where the challenge is. We know Aoife is level 8. What we don’t know are the levels of the other two. Not to mention that we’ll probably need to take out a bunch of their cronies if we want to get to them.”

“Yeah. That’s gonna be fun,” Emma said, rising from her crouch and smoothing her hair back. “But we have another problem, and one that we need to address before we go on a crusade to kill all those con artists.”

“And what would that be?” Sam asked, rising as well, and brushing the dirt off his pants.

“We need to get you some decent gear.”

Sam nodded sadly, remembering the set of Mage King gear he’d had in his bag before it’d been stolen. That just served to make him angry again, and he rubbed at his temples as a headache threatened to make an appearance. Then, he remembered the glowing blue outlines that had showed up on the gnome’s corpse the previous night.

Turning to look across the clearing, he could see that the body was still there. If he squinted, he could still make out those blue outlines, despite the bright sunlight. He hadn’t really had the heart to loot the gnome last night, but now the pain that the angry little man’s words had caused had somewhat dulled. They weren’t completely gone, but it was manageable. He was about to head over and loot the gnome’s corpse, when he belatedly remembered to check the day’s rule.

“What’s wrong?” Emma asked, looking concerned.

“I have two rules, instead of one!”

Sam stared at her, wide-eyed, but she just shrugged.

“Some days you get more than one rule. Barry explained it to me the first time it happened.”

Sam blew out a breath, allowing his temper to fade away. It wouldn’t do him any good to become all wound up over something he couldn’t control. He wasn’t in the mood of stew anyway. He was so sick of the stuff, that the mere sight of it would be enough to make him gag. The other rule would be much harder to keep, because he knew there would likely be some fighting, but he hoped that since he was going to be fighting with a team, things would work out for him.

Turning his attention back to the task at hand, Sam walked over to the gnome’s corpse and began rummaging around in his pockets. After a thorough search, he had collected several new items, all of which, he was quite pleased to have.

Sam was excited about the upgraded skill, and even more so about the items. He was quick to put on the rings and pendant, then pull the sash around his waist and tie it off. Picking up the orb, he mentally equipped it, then placed it in his pocket. It wasn’t exactly a comfortable fit, but it did its job. He shifted the ball around a bit, until the bulge wasn’t as visible. Turning back to Emma, he grinned, motioning to all his new gear.

Emma’s eyes roamed over him and she flashed him a grin as well.

“Is that an Orb in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?”

Sam rolled his eyes, but laughed all the same. He’d finally gotten some gear that he could use, even if he had looted it off a corpse, and now felt a lot less vulnerable than he had before.

“So, I’m about to make some lovely stew,” Emma said, digging into her bag and coming out with two stew rations. “Would you can to join me on a date? I promise I won’t bite,” she said, with a wink.

“Much as I’m tempted by the culinary masterwork that is instant stew, the rules won’t allow it,” Sam said, for once actually glad for one of those damned rules.

“Oh well. More for me then,” she replied, dropping one of the packets back into her bag.

As Emma began preparing herself breakfast, Sam decided that it had been a while since he’d checked his full status. So, sitting down with his back to a tree, Sam opened it.

Sam sighed as he closed his status. His Intelligence and Wisdom had almost recovered from the loss of his items, but his Luck was still crap. His Strength was still pitiful and his Agility was almost as bad, but the rest of his attributes weren’t too horrible.

The smell of cooking stew wafted over to him then, and he turned his attention to Emma, who was digging a wooden spoon into the small, steaming packet. His stomach growled lightly, betraying his hunger. Sam gritted his teeth in annoyance, suddenly feeling a lot less grateful to the Overlord. Emma, as though sensing his eyes on her, looked up from her meal and waggled her eyes brows suggestively at him. When he ignored her, she began making loud moaning sounds with each bite she took, praising the stew’s flavor and making very graphic and sexual innuendos the entire time.

Sam was nearing the end of his patience, when there was a loud squawking from overhead and Baron Von Tweet came plummeting out of the sky. A moment later, Gordon came bounding into the clearing, panting heavily and glaring up at the bird.

“Ha! I win, Poochy!”

“I would hardly call it a race, seeing as you merely avoided all of the obstacles,” Gordon replied in an indignant voice.

“Them’s the brakes, dog. Now sit!”

Gordon, fur bristling in anger, just glared at the bird but didn’t otherwise move to obey his commands.

“A deal’s a deal. Don’t go flaking out on it!” Barry screeched, flying in a circle above Gordon’s head.

“Okay, stop!” Sam yelled, already losing his patience with the two animals. “Will someone please tell me what’s going on here?”

“I would be happy to…” Gordon began, but Barry cut him off immediately.

“This mutt and I made a deal. We race back to the clearing and the winner gets to order the loser around for a day. But now that Scruffy lost, he’s trying to flake on the deal!”

“Gordon, is that true?” Sam asked, rubbing at his temples.

“That is preposterous! I would never agree to such an agreement with that foul-beaked fiend!”

Gordon stared between Sam and Barry for a few seconds, before lowering his head and letting out a low whine.

“You know that lying is wrong, don’t you?” Sam asked, feeling very weird to be the one lecturing, instead of being lectured to.

“Good. Now you have an agreement with the bird. Never back out once you’ve made a promise.”

Gordon nodded sullenly and Baron Von Tweet let out a victory screech.

“Woo-hoo! You heard the man! On your knees, bitch!” the bird yelled, walking over and thrusting his pelvis out.

“Oh, Barry,” Emma called out, getting everyone’s attention.

Turning, Sam felt his heart skip a beat. Emma was smiling at the bird, much in the way a cat would smile at a mouse.

“You might have won that race, but I hope you don’t plan on doing anything… extreme. It would make me very… upset.”

Sam felt a shiver run down his spine, as a black aura seemed to flow out from Emma and wash over all of them. Sam didn’t think birds could sweat, but Baron Von Tweet came as close to sweating as was birdly possible. He quickly nodded his head, then took off, heading to perch in the trees above.

“Holy crap, Emma. You’re fucking scary!” Sam exclaimed.

“Really?” Emma asked, her expression back to normal, and her usual playful smile back in place. “Well, how about you strip for me and we can have some fun?”