WHILE THE JIGSAW JUNGLE is a work of fiction, it was, like my other books, inspired by actual events. In August 2012, my husband of thirteen years acknowledged he was gay. He moved out a month later and our divorce was finalized in December 2013.
As embarrassed and traumatized as I was when this happened, I quickly realized I was not the only one to go through this experience. According to the Straight Spouse Network (SSN), an organization dedicated to supporting heterosexual spouses and partners of LGBTQ people, there are up to 2 million mixed-orientation couples. In 2017, the SSN averaged 173 support requests a month, coming from all fifty states. There’s even a hit series on Netflix, Grace and Frankie, that has Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin going through a similar predicament.
When a family changes, the task of creating a cohesive narrative of our lives—no matter what our sexual orientation—is difficult for everyone, but it seems especially hard on preteens/teens, who are just beginning to grapple with their own romantic feelings and sexuality. I wanted to write this book for them, for those kids who were caught up in a similar situation, so they might not feel so alone. As I wrote, I realized I was continuing a theme that shows up in all my books: that prejudice does not only hurt those being discriminated against. The fight to end injustice is important, not only because it is the right thing to do, but because it benefits us all.
As to my own story, six years later my kids are happy, healthy, do well in school, have friends, are sweet, kind, and loads of fun. In other words, they’re absolutely fine. In many ways, we were lucky—my ex never abandoned us; he was (and remains) a caring, loving, and involved father; our social and financial support systems remained strong. Our family doesn’t look like I imagined it would, the transition wasn’t easy or without pain, but the journey to honesty in our family was definitely worth it.
Here’s to a world where we can all be who we are!
Kristin Levine
Alexandria, Virginia
February 2018
RESOURCES:
STRAIGHT SPOUSE NETWORK: WWW.STRAIGHTSPOUSE.ORG
PFLAG: WWW.PFLAG.ORG