“. . . what the President meant in the intercepted chat. This was, uh, nothing but a routine translation problem. It has to be understood, that . . . It has to be understood that when the President referred to the Prime Minister of the Global Alliance as a ‘big shithead,’ what he was trying to convey was, uh — this is an American idiom used to praise people, by referring to the sheer fertilizing power of their thoughts. The President meant to say that the Prime Minister’s head was fertile, just full of these nutrients where ideas can grow. It really was a compliment. We should say again that any attempt to withdraw the Alliance’s diplomatic presence from American soil will be taken as a sign of ill will, and, uh, we are likely to respond with the most stringent . . .”