Chapter 19

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When I woke up to a blue sky in the middle of monsoon season, I thought somebody up there finally had taken pity on me. It was the day of Xander’s birthday party, and he’d insisted on renting a bounce house just like the one at the Skull Kings barbeque. The guys had set it up in the backyard just beyond the shade of my patio, where the sun shone brightly down on what promised to be a rain-free day.

Aspen breezed into the kitchen as I finished cutting my tortilla and spinach pinwheels. “Kids are starting to arrive already. Where’s Xander at?”

I checked my watch. “He went out with Logan to pick up the cake. They should be back soon.”

I walked to the front door to greet the kids and their parents. A pair of moms took off their sunglasses to ogle the Harleys crowding my driveway.

“Hey, Leslie! Kerry! How are you ladies doing?” I called.

Kerry put on a twitchy smile while Leslie’s face remained stoicly frozen. “I guess we do have the right house,” I heard Kerry mutter from the corner of her mouth.

“There’s popcorn and video games inside if you guys are interested,” Aspen said to their sons. They rushed past me, leaving their moms standing outside with Xander’s presents in their hands.

“You’re welcome to stay, too. There’s plenty of food to go around.”

Just then, Eddie dragged my grill out from the side of the house and left it standing on my front porch. He cursed to himself as he spent the next three minutes trying to coax it on.

“Thank you, but we have to go run some errands,” Leslie said stiffly, eyeing the patches on Eddie’s jacket. One of them was a flaming skull wearing a dagger-pierced crown, the club insignia. Logan also had it tattooed on his back. It was absolutely menacing.

I accepted their gifts. “Maybe next time, then.”

As I watched them clamber back into their minivans, I felt a presence approaching me from behind. I turned to find Shayna standing in the hallway, posing with one hand on her hip and a beer in the other.

“Gossip-mongers,” she quipped, shaking her head. “They come with the territory.”

“What territory?”

“Of being an old lady. You’ll see what I mean.” She winked.

Back inside, I let Heather and Yasmin help me set up the snack table. Liam and Farrah were busy erecting a miniature golf course around the house.

“Christ!” Eddie shrieked from the front yard. A muffled boom followed.

* * *

Eleven of the twenty kids from Xander’s class showed up. Logan moderated the activities, looking adorable in a soft blue polo and worn jeans. Burgers were eaten, sodas were drunk, and it was finally time for birthday cake.

I insisted on putting the candles in the cake myself and left everyone in the backyard. I needed the time alone to collect myself.

He’s turning nine, I thought as I poked the waxy spirals into the icing. And he’ll be ten next year, then eleven, then twelve...

A movement in the doorway caught my eye. I glanced up. “Lisbeth? When did you get here?”

Lisbeth smiled a dimply smile. “A little while ago. Need help?” She held out a lighter.

I waved her forward and leaned on the counter as she lit the candles. “You got a haircut. I like it.”

“Thanks,” she said. “How have you been? How are you and Logan?”

“We’re great. He’s got a nice cushy office job in downtown Phoenix, so he won’t be seeing any action for a while. We’re taking Xander to the mountains this weekend to go camping, before it gets too cold.”

“That’s real great, Carmen. I’m glad for you.”

I studied her face, the way the edges of her jaw seemed to glow from the candle’s jumping flames. “How about you, Lizzie?”

Her eyes snapped up to meet mine. “I actually came to say goodbye.”

I rose slowly, lifting my elbows off of the counter. “What do you mean?”

“I quit my job at the Sudsy Lady and I bought a bus ticket. I’m leaving tomorrow.”

When Lisbeth pulled her hand back, I caught a glimpse of that familiar compass tattoo. Like her wandering spirit, it would always be a part of her, almost impossible to erase. I imagined a faceless Anna forever linked to Lisbeth through that compass. We’d never even found out what had happened to her.

Xander was nine, which meant Lisbeth would be turning twenty soon. She certainly wasn’t a girl anymore, no matter how much we all insisted on it.

I placed my hand over hers. “Did you tell Liam?”

“Not yet. But I will.”

I smiled. “Good luck then, Lizzie.”

After a quick embrace, I hurried to rush the cake out the door. We sang happy birthday in the shaded patio. For once in my life, I didn’t make a wish as Xander blew out his candles. Everything I needed was right here, holding my hand.

Logan kissed my earlobe. “Thanks for putting this together.”

“Thanks for helping,” I said.

We sneaked a kiss while the kids were busy watching Shayna cut the cake. Eddie, red-faced from drinking, pulled out his harmonica and played a catchy tune as the old ladies doled out cake slices. Logan accepted one for us to share and pinched off a chunk with his fingers. He tried to feed me like he did at the clubhouse.

When I moved in to eat it out of his hand, he smashed it into my nose. I gaped in disbelief as frosting dripped onto my feet.

“Oh,” I whispered. “It’s on.”

I shrieked like Tarzan as I tore through herds of children, a slice of cake ready to go in my fist. I aimed it at Logan’s head. He ducked, and it exploded onto Liam’s shoulder. In retaliation, Liam smashed his cake onto Logan’s head.

Taking their cue from the adults, the kids started slinging cake as well. The old ladies exchanged helpless looks and joined in. Soon, my yard started looking like it had been snowing cake outside.

I caught sight of Lisbeth pulling Liam into the house and felt a tiny ping inside of my chest.

“You okay?” Logan asked, appearing at my elbow.

“Yeah,” I said, recovering quickly. I reassured him with a kiss, putting Lisbeth out of my mind. She was an adult now. She could handle herself. “I’m just going to go inside and clean myself off.”

“Wait.” Logan caught my wrist and lifted it to his mouth. He sucked a dime-sized smudge of frosting off of my skin.

My eyes widened. “Logan, the kids—”

“We have more than enough eyes watching them,” Logan said, tilting his head toward the door. “But you might need a little help getting all this cake off of your body.”

I closed my eyes and sighed. “Ten minutes.”

Logan smirked and wrapped his hand around the back of my neck. He pushed his cheek against mine and licked some stray cake off of my jaw. “Ten minutes should be plenty.”