It was the day before her wedding. And that was surely a sentence to send a flutter of nerves through any bride. Even one who wasn’t going to actually get married.
Yet the man she’d decided to walk down the aisle towards, loved her.
She’d chosen the uncertainty of a relationship with Ben over the certainty of marriage with Duncan.
Stupid decision? Very possibly.
‘Molly?’
She snapped out of her head and turned her attention back to Rachel, who was showing her and Ben the proposed setting for their wedding. The ballroom.
‘What do you think? We can make an arch of the red roses you chose, which would look great against this backdrop.’ Rachel waved towards the gold-framed paintings and deep red walls.
It looked like the perfect venue … for someone else’s wedding. ‘Umm, can’t we do it outside?’ The day might not be destined for happy ever after, but Molly figured it might end up being the only wedding she’d ever have.
Rachel looked at Ben, who gave one of his characteristic shrugs. ‘Whatever Molly wants.’
‘This is our wedding,’ she reminded him. It was one thing letting her choose, another being so detached he didn’t seem to care.
‘But it’s not.’ He slotted his hands into his jeans’ pockets. ‘It’s us putting on a show in front of the cameras.’
She tried to remind herself he was being practical. ‘I’m still going to be wearing a bridal dress. I’ll be walking down the aisle to whatever music we finally agree on, holding a bouquet of red roses which I chose so it wouldn’t clash with my hair. My parents will be here, and my best friends. We’re going to eat cake and drink champagne, even though we won’t be cutting the cake as man and wife.’ Damn it, why were eyes starting to prick, her voice to sound shaky?
‘Hey.’ He strode over to her, eyes full of concern as he tilted her chin so she had to look at him. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘Nothing.’ She sniffed.
The corner of his mouth lifted in a wry smile. ‘Use your words, Molly.’
‘Funny.’ Out of the corner of her eyes she could see Rachel and the camera crew watching them. Filming them. God, this was embarrassing. ‘I know I’m being stupid,’ she whispered. ‘I know I should see this like you do, one final thing to endure before you get to escape, but … but I’m actually sad this is all coming to an end. And I’m sad I’m about to have a wedding without any of the joy.’
A deep furrow bisected his beautiful eyes. ‘It doesn’t have to be joyless. It can be a … a celebration of our month here.’ He kissed away a tear that had slid down her cheek. ‘I bet there aren’t many people who thought you and I would make it this far after our first meeting.’
‘Me included,’ she mumbled. If only the word wedding wasn’t so aligned with marriage, wasn’t so aligned with where she’d wanted to end up.
‘All the time in the world,’ Ben’s softly spoken words nudged her out of her head.
‘Sorry?’
His thumb caressed the curve of her cheek, eyes warm and understanding on hers. ‘That’s the song I think you should walk down the aisle to. A reminder that there’s a life waiting for us outside these four walls. A life where we can make plans, do what we want to do. All at a pace of our own choosing.’ He planted a soft kiss on her lips. ‘A life where I spend every day making sure you know how much I love you.’
But it’s not enough to marry me.
She swallowed the words. He’d explained his reasons and she’d accepted them. If she was choosing Ben, she was choosing a relationship without a safety net.
Rachel cleared her throat and Molly felt a deep sigh rumble through Ben. ‘We know you’re still there,’ he said dryly.
‘Good. Would you like to share with the viewers what you’ve been discussing?’ She turned to Molly. ‘You looked quite upset there.’
‘I’m a bit overwhelmed this is all coming to an end,’ Molly admitted, keeping to part of the truth. ‘I’ve had such a fabulous time on the show, and I don’t want to leave.’
‘And is that how you feel, Ben?’ Rachel asked, with a glint in her eyes.
He gave his sister a long-suffering look. ‘No, Rachel. It isn’t how I feel. I’m looking forward to not being followed around by you guys.’
She rolled her eyes and waved the cameras away before turning back to her brother. ‘As unbelievable as this may sound, I’m looking forward to not following you around, too.’ She pointed towards the door. ‘Why don’t we head outside and you can tell us where you’d like your wedding to take place.’
‘Does it really matter?’
Yes, Molly wanted to scream at Ben, it matters to me. She knew it was the sentimental side of her, rubbing up against the practical side of him, but to hear him treat their day as such a chore, was hurtful.
‘Talking now as your sister and not the associate producer,’ Rachel said to Ben as they walked towards the French doors. ‘Have you spoken to our parents about coming to the wedding?’
He shook his head, his expression hardening. ‘I didn’t see the point.’
Molly’s heart sunk even further. Hadn’t he just said they should treat it as a celebration? Certainly, she wanted her parents there. She wanted them to meet him.
‘Well, it’s your decision, so fine,’ Rachel answered, glancing over at her brother as they walked past the swimming pool and down the steps onto the main lawn. ‘Who are you going to invite then?’
Ben stared straight ahead. ‘I’ve only invited Jack and Sam.’
Rachel pursed her lips. ‘Doesn’t sound like much of a wedding list.’
Ben halted and turned to face his sister. ‘It isn’t much of a wedding. Sorry to put a pin in your happy ending bubble but we won’t be saying “I do”. I respect that you love the show you work on, but putting couples through a sham of a wedding so you can provide viewers with some will they, won’t they drama under the banner of entertainment? It fucking stinks.’
His eyelids slammed shut and he heaved in a breath, only opening them again once he’d let it all out.
Tension pinged through the air following his outburst, and Molly didn’t know where to look. Ben had been tearing a strip off his sister, yet it felt like he’d been ripping into her, too. ‘Umm, anywhere outside is fine for our wedding, our sham wedding,’ she corrected, tears stinging her eyes again. ‘I’ve just realised I promised to meet the girls to … err … try on our dresses.’
She heard Ben curse under his breath before saying her name, but she needed time away from him. Ignoring his plaintive look, she hurried inside.
And slapped straight into a wall of muscle.
‘Whoa, where are you running off to?’
Duncan put his hands on her arms to steady her.
‘Nowhere.’
He scanned her face, his brow furrowing. ‘You look upset, babe. What has that bastard said now?’
‘I’m fine.’
‘Yeah, that’s a lie. You think I can’t tell if you’re upset after dating you for over a year?’ He sighed. ‘Look, I’m glad I bumped in to you. I know you turned my offer of marriage down, but it’s not too late to rethink it.’
Molly didn’t want to hear this. She’d made her decision, and yet … there was something about the way Duncan was looking at her now, all soft and caring, that reminded her she had been happy with him. Until Ben had come along. ‘You can’t mean that,’ she whispered.
‘Why not? We were good together. No dramas, just you and me, rubbing along happily.’ He smiled. ‘You can rely on me to look after you, babe. I’ll give you the security you need.’
It was what she’d always longed for, yet something about the way he said it, grated on her. He meant well, but needing someone to look after her, like she was weak, like she couldn’t look after herself? Was that how he saw her? How Ben saw her?
No. She remembered the discussions they’d had about her starting her own upcycling business. The way he’d looked at her with such confidence. The fete was your success, not mine. You’re more than capable of doing it again, on a larger scale.
Ben saw the woman she wanted to be. Duncan only saw the struggling, heartbroken woman she’d been when he’d first met her. ‘And Jasmine? Isn’t she expecting you to marry her?’
He shrugged. ‘I like her, sure, but I want to marry you.’
‘You can’t keep saying that. You’re confusing me.’
‘I’ve got to keep saying it, babe. By tomorrow, it will be too late.’ He reached for her hand. ‘Look, I get it, everything’s too much right now. Why don’t you come with me. I’ve got just the thing to take your mind off things.’
‘Does it involve alcohol?’ She really, really needed a drink.
Duncan studied her for a moment, then nodded. ‘I guess I can deviate off my schedule for once.’ He laughed. ‘Come on, let’s go and get smashed.’
It was probably a terrible idea, but it was also exactly what she needed.