Chapter 3
“Anyone who limits her vision to memories of yesterday is already dead.” Lillie Langtry
Lindstrom was taking a very late dinner in the officer’s mess hall aboard the Lovelace. They had less than two months to go before the planned launch date for the deep-space mission and every officer on board had been working twelve-hour days. Other than the captain that was. Based on the frequent, round-the-clock directives from him, Nils couldn’t confirm that Matt had been sleeping at all. Needless to say, the first officer wasn’t in the best of moods; his mood wasn’t improved when the, in his estimation, annoyingly chipper Conroy Kennedy sat down beside him.
“Good evening, Commander. May I join you?”
“It seems as if you already have.”
“If you’d like me to leave, sir, I can—”
“Oh, sit down. Pay me no mind. It’s the exhaustion talking. Something you don’t seem to suffer from.”
“I’m used to it. More than once at the front we would go a week with less than ten hours sleep, total.”
“And yet you signed up for this.”
“Well, I expect things will get better when the additional staff comes aboard. Speaking of which, when will you and the captain be approving our requests?”
“It’s on our list, Kennedy, our very long list,” he said wearily. “Why?”
“You see, my friend has applied for second in command of Tactical and I’d like to get that approved before her S&R team moves to Antiliac. That far out, it could hold up—”
“Ok, I understand. I’ll see what I can do about expediting our review of those appointments. It’s mainly a formality, anyway. What’s her name by the way?”
“Lieutenant Naiche Decker.”
“Decker? Are we talking about Naomi Decker’s daughter? She wants to serve on the Lovelace?”
“Yes, sir. I talked her into it.”
“May I ask why?”
To Lindstrom’s surprise, he thought he actually saw a flash of anger spark in Kennedy’s usually calm eyes. “Commander, I know you’ve probably heard that she’s a bit…unconventional.”
“If that’s a euphemism for occasionally insubordinate, then yes, that’s some of what I’ve heard. To say the least.”
“You may know her reputation, but I know her. We served together in tactical Front for five years and she saved my life more times than I can count. She’s tough, resourceful, and dedicated. On top of all of that, she’s the finest combat pilot in the Corps. Bar none.”
“Are you thinking we’ll be involved in many dog fights out there, Lieutenant?”
“Frankly, sir, we have no idea what we’ll find out there. Which brings me to my last point about Decker. She’s just done a year with Search and Rescue. That’s another skill no one else onboard has; Deck and her dog could really come in handy.”
“I appreciate your enthusiasm and loyalty, Lieutenant, but I’m not sure she’s right for the Lovelace.”
“Well, then, sir, with all due respect, I’m not sure that I’m right for the Lovelace.”
“Meaning what?”
“Meaning, I don’t know that I want to do this without her.” They stared at each other in silence for a second while the weight of the statement hung heavy between them. Con rose from the table, tray in hand. “If you don’t mind, Commander, I’ll finish my dinner in my office.”
“Of course, Lieutenant.”
***
Because of that particular conversation, Lindstrom cornered the captain the next morning and forced him to review the Section-head appointments.
They were flying through them until they got to Kennedy’s list. “So, the next candidate is Lieutenant Naiche Decker.”
“What? You’re kidding, right? Let me see that.”
Nils made a swift swiping motion across his tablet in the direction of Ricci’s, neatly transferring the data from one tablet to the other. “Unfortunately, no, I’m not kidding. She applied for second in command of Tactical. You know her?”
“Yes,” Ricci answered without looking up. “Yes, I do.” He met Nils’ eyes. “You?”
“I know of her.”
“Yeah, who doesn’t?” Matt seemed to actually be considering the appointment, but he eventually laid his tablet down and said, “I don’t think signing her on would be advisable.”
“I agree.”
“Well, that was easy. How many more of these are there?”
“Maybe not so easy. There is a complication - Kennedy absolutely wants her on his staff. They served together in Force-1 and he apparently thinks a lot of her.”
“Too bad. I guess Kennedy’s gonna learn that we can’t always get what we want.”
“Yes, but he may not stay onboard the Lovelace without her.”
“He actually said that?”
“He most certainly did.”
“Think he means it?”
“I most certainly do.”
“You really think he’d resign his post over this?”
“He was most insistent about needing her onboard.” Lindstrom leaned back and sighed at the inexplicable nature of Kennedy’s obsession with that particular second lieutenant. “Perhaps they’re lovers,” he suggested.
“You think?”
“Well, he’s only four years older than her but I don’t know the precise nature of her requirements there.”
“Meaning?”
“Please. Before her fame as the revenge-fueled ‘comrade killer’ she was known far and wide as ‘daddy-issues Decker’.”
“I’d never heard that, and I definitely didn’t need to hear it now.”
“Sorry, Captain. I’ll redouble my efforts to keep you in the dark about commonly known corps gossip.”
“How would you like some commonly known corps gossip about the captain of the Lovelace decking his first officer?”
Recognizing the captain’s genuine ire, Lindstrom offered a rare sincere apology but also took note of the fact that he had struck an unexpected nerve. “That still leaves us with the matter of Lieutenant Decker’s application.”
“Yep, it does. So, what’s your recommendation?”
“I recommend that the captain make this call.”
“Thanks a lot.”
“You’re the one who wanted the pretty gold braid on your wrists. Sir.”
Gold braid at the wrists and down the pant leg was the UDC captain’s insignia, and “getting the gold braid” was many officer’s driving ambition upon graduation from The Rock. Lindstrom’s uniform was decorated with silver braid, which only a first officer was entitled to wear. Due to his temperament and distaste for corps politics, he was well content to muster out having never seen the flash of gold on his uniform.
“Right,” Matt said, with a shake of his head at his first officer’s jibe about his rank. He picked up the tablet again, perusing the application with a weary sigh. Finally, he shrugged his shoulders and rolled his head, saying, “Let me sleep on this one.”
Based on Ricci’s reaction to the subject of Decker, Lindstrom was fairly convinced that he already had.
***
Two days before its scheduled launch, Lt. Decker was walking up the entrance ramp of the Lovelace. She gave it a thorough once over, admitting to herself that the command ship was extremely impressive. Previously she’d only seen them flying overhead - huge striking silver tubes, the bridge visible as a semi-circular disk on the front. They were no less imposing up close, even in land-dock. Especially since the Lovelace was now half again as large as it had been before. The new sciences labs bulged out on the port side and the new hydroponic gardens expanded the starboard side.
The faithful Blue Heeler Kayatennae was close at Decker’s heels, his nose twitching at the unfamiliar scents, his ears perking at the cacophony of sounds that signaled a ship being prepared for a long voyage. As Deck crested the top of the ramp, she was overjoyed to spot Con in the entrance bay. He was in conversation with one of the thinnest, palest men she’d ever seen. He was taller than Con, but definitely couldn’t come close to matching him in weight. From the silver braid adorning his uniform, Deck knew he had to be the first officer, Lindstrom.
She gave the greeting whistle of their old tactical Front squad and Con immediately turned towards the sound. Con jogged over to meet her and pulled Deck into a bear hug. “Hey, you made it at last!”
“Yeah, our transport from Antiliac was delayed.” She shifted the strap of the navy-blue regulation issue duffel bag off her shoulder, letting it fall onto the floor and saying emphatically, “It’s so good to see you in person again.” She and Con had briefly re-united, seven months previously, for a visit to his family Earth-side.
“It sure is.” Con bent down on one knee and greeted Kay, saying, “And this fellow, too. Think he remembers me?”
“I don’t know, he was little more than a puppy when you saw him last.” As if to prove her wrong, Kay offered his paw up to Con in a friendly greeting. “Ah, there you go. Looks like he does.”
While this exchange was taking place, Lindstrom had approached the group. Deck turned to him and saluted. “Lieutenant Decker at your service, Commander.”
He nodded in return, and said, “Welcome to the Lovelace, Decker,” but his tone was unimpressed. “Since you’re not only the very last recruit to board, but have a dog with you, I’d gathered it was you.” He looked down at Kay and asked, “So, the dog does go everywhere with you, is that right?”
Kay threw a questioning glance at Con as she responded, “Yes, sir. That’s protocol. I would have thought you’d been briefed—”
“Yes, I was but we’re just not used to having pets onboard the Lovelace.”
“Kayatennae is not a pet, Commander. He’s a corpsman, third class and a member of your crew now.”
“I’m honored,” Lindstrom responded dryly, clearly indicating he was anything but.
Con picked her bag up and offered, “Come on, Deck. I’ll show you around.”
“Not quite yet, Lieutenant. Decker needs to get her physical but first—”
“Oh, I don’t need that, sir.” She pulled her hand-held out of her pocket, continuing, “I have a waiver from S&R Medical. They just saw me a week ago and—”
“I don’t really care what S&R Medical did or said or waived. Lovelace protocol requires a physical for every new recruit and it will be followed. Understood?”
“I was merely trying to save Medical some unnecessary work—”
“Are you arguing with me, Lieutenant?”
Deck took a deep breath and answered evenly, “It seems that I am, sir, though that was certainly not my intent.”
“Good. Report to Med-Bay, immediately after you meet with Captain Ricci.”
Con broke into the exchange, asking with surprise, “The captain wants to see her? Now?”
“Yes, he was very clear on the subject. I was about to explain that when Lieutenant Decker attempted to establish her own on-boarding procedures.” He turned back to Decker. “Captain Ricci requested to speak with you in his office immediately upon your arrival.”
Deck gave a little shake of her head to let a visibly worried Con know that this was no big deal while she muttered, “Of course he did.”
“I’ll escort the lieutenant to the captain’s office. You may take her bag and her dog, err, the corpsman to her quarters, Kennedy.”
“Commander, canine corps protocol states—”
“All right Decker, bring him along. I don’t think the captain will be happy about this.”
“I’m very sorry to hear that, sir,” answered Decker, letting him know that she was just as gifted as he was at indicating the opposite meaning of what had just been said.
A couple of minutes later they were on the command level of the ship, which encompassed the offices and quarters of both the captain and first officer, as well as those of third in command, Chief Engineer Carla Ramsey. As they approached the captain’s office, Lindstrom looked at the necklace Decker wore and said, “Lovelace rules don’t permit visible jewelry while on duty.” Decker knew that once she was in the captain’s presence, she would be considered to be on duty but failed to see why her necklace would present a problem. She was about to tell Lindstrom that, when he added, “Unless, I suppose…it’s a tribal thing?”
“A tribal thing?” Decker asked with amused surprise.
“Yes, your mother wore one, didn’t she?”
“She wore this one. This is hers.”
“Oh, I didn’t know anything was recovered from the wreck—” He caught himself, suddenly seeming to understand the insensitive nature of his statement.
“Very little was recovered, but this was.”
“That’s something, I suppose,” Lindstrom offered awkwardly. He straightened up to his full height and said, in a much more confident tone, “I didn’t know your mother well, but we were in the same class at The Rock and I followed her career with great interest. Extraordinary woman.”
“Thank you, sir. Yes, she was.”
“Her death was an immense loss to Uniterrae in general and the UDC in particular.”
“Yes, a loss to Uniterrae and the UDC,” Decker echoed sardonically. “Exactly.” She sighed and changed the subject back to the forbidden necklace. “I always wear it under my jacket when I’m on duty.” She swiftly zipped up her jacket so the offending item was out of sight. “See? All better.”
They stopped in front of a smoked-quartz door and Lindstrom waved his hand in front of the lighted panel in the jamb. A chime sounded, and a deep voice said, “Enter.”
Decker followed Lindstrom into the large airy office to find Ricci sitting behind a massive wooden desk. It took some effort, but she managed to refrain from looking around at the personal effects displayed on the walls and kept her eyes trained on Ricci. He hadn’t changed substantially in the six years since she’d seen last him in person. He rose from the desk, she saluted, and when the captain nodded in response, assumed parade rest; Kay stood at attention beside her.
“Captain, here’s Lieutenant Decker, as you requested.”
“Yes, thanks, Lindstrom.”
“I’m sorry about the dog, Captain, but it seems that it’s standard protocol. He accompanies her everywh—”
“Yes, I understand. Not a problem.” He looked at the first officer expectantly, but Lindstrom didn’t budge. Since he seemed immune to the hint, Ricci added, “You’re dismissed, Commander.”
While Lindstrom exited the office, Decker tucked away for later contemplation the information that he was a nosy son-of-a-bitch and had apparently been given no explanation as to why Ricci had wanted to see her.
She and the captain stared silently at each other for a few long seconds before Ricci said, “At ease, Lieutenant.” Decker relaxed her stance but was hardly at ease. She gave Kay the signal to sit at her feet as the captain explained, “I thought it best that we get some things cleared up right from the start. Starting with your intentions.”
He looked at her expectantly, obviously awaiting a response, but Decker was slightly bewildered. “My intentions, Captain?”
Her answered seemed to irk him. “Yes,” he enunciated clearly. “Your intentions. I was quite surprised that you requested this post.”
The light was beginning to dawn for her, but Decker couldn’t refrain from giving the smallest snort of amusement. “I was equally surprised when you approved it.”
“Well, that’s a very snappy comeback but it doesn’t answer my question.”
She raised an eyebrow and protested, “I didn’t hear a question, sir.”
Deck wasn’t absolutely sure whether she’d meant to provoke him, but she clearly had. The captain took one step forward and retorted, “See, that? Right there?” He shook his head, emphasizing his next statement. “Not gonna fly on my ship. If you think I’m going to put up with even the slightest bit of insolence from you, think again.”
She felt that was an unwarranted over-reaction and really wanted to tell him so. “Request permission to speak freely, sir?”
“De—” Ricci’s eyes narrowed as he finished, “—nied.” He let out a puff of exasperation and said in a much more even tone, “Now, since you’re obtuse – or pretending to be – I will ask plainly, why did you request assignment to the Lovelace?”
Decker’s hackles had risen to meet Ricci’s, but she realized he had the upper hand and she had no one to blame but herself. She was glad Kay had witnessed many a confrontation between her and superior officers and could observe the rising tensions between these two humans calmly. She took a deep breath before answering, “Because Conroy Kennedy asked me to, and I’d do just about anything for him.” She really hoped he’d gotten the message that she considered serving under him to be the ultimate sacrifice.
“I see.” He turned on his heel and paced the room, turning back to ask, “Are you and Kennedy romantically involved?”
Of all the many times Naiche had been tempted to tell a superior officer to go fuck himself, she felt this one would have been the most deserved. But once again, she managed to avoid uttering the career-ending phrase and instead answered, “Frankly, Captain, that’s none of your business.”
“Want to try that again, Lieutenant?” Ricci demanded sharply.
Belatedly Decker remembered that one of the rules of a command ship was the two top officers’ right to inquire into such matters. “My mistake, sir, I stand corrected. It is your business. For the record, no, Con and I are just friends. Good friends.” She would never understand why she felt it necessary to add, “And I don’t have many friends in the Corps.”
“That’s not how I hear it.”
Decker’s immediate thought was that Ricci had now topped his previous efforts in the “Deserves a Fuck You” sweepstakes. She took a second to push her anger below the surface before pointedly asking, “Was that a question, Captain?”
“No, I actually have no interest in discussing your colorful reputation. What I am interested in, is your assurance that you can serve on this ship, like any other corps officer, without regard to our….” Ricci paused as if measuring his words carefully. “…past…” he hesitated again before concluding with a jerk of his head, “…that is to say, our relationship.”
Biting off every word, Decker answered, “Captain Ricci, I can serve on this ship, under your command, just like any other corps officer, because the only relationship I want with you is one of captain and lieutenant.”
“Good. Just what I wanted to hear,” he answered in an unexpectedly satisfied tone. Decker was still weighing a response when he cut off that option by saying firmly, “Dismissed.”
She gave Kay the signal to follow her and gladly exited the office. She waited until she was well out of earshot before turning back and hissing at the closed door, “Jackass!” Feeling immense relief, Decker looked down at Kay and said, “Let’s go find Med-Bay before we have that other jackass up my butt about violating his precious on-boarding procedures!”
When Decker and Kay entered Med-Bay, they found Commander Lindstrom lounging against the reception desk talking to a short, plump woman with a mass of curly dark hair pulled back into a ponytail. She was wearing the unmistakable white uniform of UDC Medical. The contrast between the two officers couldn’t have been greater and Deck took a moment to drink it in before approaching the pair. After Decker greeted them respectfully, the doctor introduced herself as Dr. Rita Clemente, chief medical officer, and said she would be conducting Decker’s physical.
Lindstrom pulled himself up to his impressive height and said, “Lieutenant, I am most gratified to see that you and your canine shadow did manage to find the way here.”
“I certainly hope you didn’t actually feel the need to check up on me, sir.”
“Let’s just say that your attitude didn’t fill me with confidence.”
“Commander, I assure you, I would never disobey a direct order on my first day.” When Lindstrom continued to frown down at her, Deck added, “I usually wait at least two weeks before I start that.”
“What a coincidence, two weeks is at least how long you’ll spend in the brig if you ever disobey an order of mine.”
“Now, Nils,” Clemente admonished, “I think the lieutenant was making a small joke.”
“Do you have some sort of instrumentation that allows you to see something that small, Doctor?” While Decker was briefly pondering if it was too late to go back to S&R, Lindstrom turned to her and asked, “How did things go with the captain?”
She saw a chance to get her own back by blocking the first officer’s attempt to satisfy his curiosity. “I’m sure Captain Ricci will fill you in, sir.”
“I asked you a question, Lieutenant Decker.”
“Well then, it went just great,” she replied with mock enthusiasm.
“Really?”
“Yep, I’m still a crew member!”
“For now,” Lindstrom drawled as he turned to leave.
Naiche looked towards the door the commander had just exited. “Wow, he’s just a singular ray of sunshine, isn’t he?”
“Give him a chance,” the doctor said. “He’ll grow on you.”
“I don’t know. Back home we had a saying about guys like him.”
“What’s that?”
“He seems like a half a shot of strong whiskey and a piece of ass would kill him.”
“I can personally vouch that neither thing is true,” Clemente answered dryly. She paused briefly before explaining, “He’s my boyfriend.”
“Ah, sorry, Doc. No offense.”
“Why would anyone take offense at that?” she asked, while shooting Decker a quelling look. Then Clemente held out a patient gown and pointed at an exam room. “Strip. Everything off but your underwear; then put this on. I’ll be right in.” Deck told Kay to wait for her by the door and went to undress.
***
Clemente entered the room to find Decker sitting on the exam table, swinging her legs and looking around with an expression Rita couldn’t quite name. She told VICI to open up a new patient file and arranged her instruments in neat order while musing about Decker. It was certainly evident why Nils and the brash lieutenant hadn’t hit it off, but Rita wondered how she’d already run up against Ricci. The captain could be notoriously hot-tempered and emotional, but he was generally an easy-going man, who often disregarded any procedures or regulations he considered cumbersome.
Clemente had just begun the physical when she stopped to examine an odd scar on Decker’s left thigh, closely. “What happened here?”
“Oh, I was pulling some survivors out of a crash when some jagged metal caught me there. By the time we got everyone back to base, Medical was swamped so I just stitched it up myself.”
“Stitched it up? What does that mean?”
Decker made a sewing motion with her hand and said, “You know…closed the wound with stitches.”
“What?! With a needle and thread? Like they did a thousand years ago?”
Deck nodded, and said, “Actually a sterile needle and filament; I always have them in my pack. Don’t worry, S&R Medical looked it over last week. There’s no infection or anything. They wanted to heal the scar, but I told them not to bother, it’ll eventually fade.”
Clemente couldn’t get past the use of so archaic a technique, asking, “Where in the world did you learn to do that?”
“My grandfather. He was a doctor. Not like you, though. He practiced traditional medicine and that’s what he taught me. Our band of Chiricahua is quite spread out and he traveled far to see patients. I always went along with him and became like his assistant or nurse, I guess you would say.”
“What else do you know how to do?”
“Oh…lots of things you guys don’t do anymore: help set bones, insert IVs, take vital signs manually….”
“Huh. I’ll be damned. Didn’t you think about joining Medical when you came to the UDC?”
“I did, actually. It just didn’t take.” Decker swallowed hard and added, “Turns out I’m just not cut out for N’daa medicine.”
“N’daa medicine? What’s that mean?”
“White man’s medicine.”
Clemente, whose family still resided on the South American continent, paused her exam and glared at Decker. “Lieutenant, did you just call me white?”
Decker seemed unfazed by her faux pas, explaining airily, “Oh not white per se. More like…not-Apache.”
“There’s a specific word meaning ‘not-Apache’?”
“Well, the direct translation is stranger, or enemy.” Decker shrugged. “All the same thing.”
“Do you ever think about what comes out of your mouth? Before you blurt it out, that is.”
Decker admitted without a shred of shame, “Rarely.”
Rita took a step back and put her hands on her hips. “Then it’s high time you start, Lieutenant Decker. There’s a hundred of us on a relatively small ship, setting off on a long, dangerous journey. You’re a UDC officer – start acting like one.”
At last, Decker seemed suitably admonished. She answered with surprising sincerity, “Yes, sir.” She swallowed and offered the phrase they’d all been taught at The Rock, “I will do better.”
Other than Clemente’s verbal notes for the patient record, and her observations about her patient’s robust health, the next ten minutes of the exam were conducted in a silence that started to get on Rita’s nerves. Finally, she said, “Hmm, seems like I may have over-estimated you.”
“Doctor?”
“I thought you were the type that bounces back from a dressing down pretty quickly.”
Decker snorted with amusement as she assured her, “Oh, I do. It becomes second nature after the first hundred or so.”
“Then why the silent treatment?”
She shrugged her shoulders, explaining, “It’s not that. I know it probably comes off like I talk a lot, but when I have nothing to say, I say nothing.”
“Is that a fact?”
“Yes, small talk is such an N’d—” Decker stopped herself mid-word, evidently not wanting to repeat her recent mistake.
“N’daa thing?” Clemente finished. “Do the Apache really divide the entire world so neatly into Apache and not-Apache?”
“Yeah, we kinda’ do. More so since the Big Split I think.”
“The what?”
“You know, when most of the world went one way and we went another – and reclaimed our ancient ways. Though to be fair, it’s not so much an Apache thing as it is a Chiricahua thing.”
“I’m not sure I understand the difference.”
“Okay, let me see if I can explain it. It’s like if I said to you, ‘Wow, Lovelace senior officers actually care how junior officers feel about them’, and you answered, ‘To be fair, that’s not so much a Lovelace thing as a Medical thing.’”
Clemente was well aware that Decker’s amusing analogy neatly contained both a compliment for her and a slam at Lindstrom and probably Ricci too, yet she couldn’t help but laugh. It was certainly true what they said, Naiche was nothing like her gentle, tactful mother, so Rita wondered why the young woman still seemed so familiar. She supposed that it was because, other than having a much taller, more muscular build, she was the very image of Naomi.
That notion was fresh in her mind when a few minutes later she met Decker coming out of the exam room, now back in uniform; Rita’s eyes were drawn to the necklace she wore, visible over her half-zipped jacket. The doctor nodded at it, asking, “That’s your mother’s locket isn’t it?”
“Yes.” Deck’s surprise was evident. “How did you even know it was a locket?”
“I knew your mother. Well, I met her,” Rita amended. “I was stationed at UDC HQ for a while when she was there. She rarely came into Med-Bay, but the couple of times she did, she’d invariably start talking about you and show everyone holos of you on her locket.”
“Oh,” was all Deck could manage at first. “I never knew she did that.”
“It was apparent that she loved talking about you. I’m sorry you didn’t get more time together; it must have been terribly hard for you when she died.”
“It was. It still is.” Decker squinted at her before continuing, “Thank you for acknowledging that.”
“What?”
“The personal nature of the loss. So many in the UDC go on and on about what a blow it was for the corps and even for Uniterrae but forget….” Decker stopped, shaking her head, and biting her lip, unable or unwilling to finish the thought.
“That’s awful. I can’t believe people do that.”
“Oh, believe it.”
The pointed nature of Decker’s response gave Rita the sinking feeling that she might need to have another discussion with her boyfriend about his people skills. “Anyone I know?”
“You’d be surprised.” She called to Kay who’d been napping near the door during the exam and left Med-Bay with a jaunty wave. “See you around, Doc.”