There was someone in the house.
Even in the frozen darkness of a December night Honora Blake could sense it. A thrill of instinctive caution had roused her from her sleep, but she was not afraid.
She possessed courage to match any man’s—as well as a flintlock pistol on her bedside table, and she was an excellent shot. A childhood spent in the shadow of Virginia’s Blue Ridge Mountains under her father’s tutelage had seen to that. Felling a bear at twenty paces did wonders for a girl’s confidence.
Honora lay perfectly still, ears straining to catch another tell-tale creak of uneven floorboards. Usually the tired old house of which she despaired gave her nothing but trouble, with its leaking roof and draughty doors, but tonight its groans were allies, helping her track the steps of whoever was moving about downstairs.
They weren’t even bothering to try to keep quiet, she thought with a flicker of irritation. Would they have been so brazen if she still had a husband? Did they imagine a woman on her own was too weak to challenge them?
If that’s what they’re thinking, they’re due a surprise. Whoever it is creeping around my parlour will soon wish they hadn’t.
The mournful keening of the wind outside her window covered the sound of Honora’s light step as she slipped from her bed and threw a shawl over her nightgown. Her hand was steady as she retrieved the flintlock and checked the muzzle, holding it up in the dim moonlight filtering through ill-fitting shutters.
Since her husband had vanished into thin air she’d had to fend for herself, the wretch having disappeared without a backward glance when the money he’d been counting on showed no signs of appearing.
She cursed herself daily now for allowing him to turn her head, travelling with him to England and actually thinking herself lucky to be his bride. Frank Blake was so handsome, so dazzling with his charm and wit and way of making a person feel they were the only one in the room and he’d come along just as Honora was beginning to believe nobody would ever place a ring on her finger. Ma and Pa had tried to reason with her, sensing he was not all he seemed, but Honora had loved Frank so hopelessly that their pleas only made her more determined to prove them wrong and nothing would satisfy her but crossing the churning Atlantic to become Mrs Blake.
The wedge that Honora’s stubbornness had driven between her and her parents only increased over time, that final bitter argument on the day she’d boarded the boat and sailed away from them more painful than ever now that Honora had to admit they’d been right. How could she ever face them again, knowing how poorly she had repaid their concern—with angry words and defiance, wounding the two people who loved her more than anything else in the world? How could she return to them, knowing how little she deserved the heartfelt welcome they would give her?
I can’t, that’s how—which is why I still find myself here. Thousands of miles from home, the mistress of a house crumbling all around me and a good-for-nothing husband I haven’t seen in three years. If only I’d listened, hadn’t thought I knew best, I could have saved myself this misery—a naive bride at twenty-something, now a worn-out cynic of thirty-five. And now there’s an intruder in my parlour. That’s all I need.
Steeling herself against the cruel chill of the night, she crossed the room and pressed an ear against the bedroom door. From the other side of it came the vague sounds of someone blundering in the darkness. With her full lips pressed into a tight line, Honora eased open the door, wincing at the squeak of its hinges. Whoever was below evidently didn’t hear, however, and she slid from the room without a further sound, one hand holding her shawl close to her chest and the other firmly grasping the flintlock’s wooden grip.
Careful now. Go slowly.
She crept down the landing towards the stairs and peered through the banisters. The hall below was shrouded in darkness and for the first time Honora felt a shiver of apprehension prickle up her spine. Brave or not, she was still entirely alone at Wycliff Lodge, half a mile of Somerset countryside lying between her and her nearest neighbour. Her maid, Mary, had gone back to her cottage for the night and wouldn’t return until the next day, the only help Honora could still afford and, after years of service, now more a friend than a servant—which was just as well, for nobody else seemed particularly interested in getting to know her.
Perhaps it was the colour of Honora’s skin that troubled those living nearby, a soft tawny bronze courtesy of her father’s African heritage, or the fact she’d survived alone in the crumbling old house ever since Frank abandoned her. Only her presence stopped it from falling down completely, the sole reason Frank allowed her to stay on in a property he had no intention of revisiting. Hadn’t the doctor’s wife even caught her chopping firewood once, a strange display from the equally strange young woman Mr Blake had brought home from the Americas? Whatever stopped her neighbours from coming to take tea was nothing she could change and as the years went by Honora found herself growing accustomed to solitude, her independence blooming with her fierce vow never to depend on a man again...
Another bump, louder this time, came from downstairs and Honora swallowed a jolt of unease. Beneath the thin linen of her nightgown her heart began to jump, the pistol’s grip sliding a little as her palm grew damp with sweat. Searching through the gloom, she clamped her fingers tighter around her shawl and descended the stairs, hardly daring to breathe in the now silent night.
Have courage. Think what Ma would do.
As always, even after five years, the thought of her mother gave Honora a pang of homesickness and longing for the woman she missed more than any other. Pa might have taught her to shoot, but surely much of her natural spirit came from Cicily Jackson. It had been the stuff of scandal, a white plantation owner’s daughter wedding a freedman, and Honora’s grandfather had cut the couple off without a cent. He’d mellowed a little when his granddaughter was born and tried to make amends, but by then the damage had been done. Ma wanted no part in a family that wouldn’t welcome her husband, so blinded by their prejudice they would cast out their own flesh and blood.
She and Pa had made their way alone, opposite in so many ways and yet coming together to create Honora, who bridged the gap between them. Her mass of curling black hair and tapered chin came from her father while Ma had contributed wide-set hazel eyes, the best parts of both parents combining to make a striking face not soon forgotten. Mr and Mrs Jackson had hoped their cherished daughter would find a man deserving of her when she came to wed, their pride and joy sure to attract the very best of husbands...but instead it had been Frank Blake who came to call, damn him, his lies and false promises blinding Honora to all good sense and tearing the family apart.
She reached the hall and stood for a moment to collect herself. The parlour lay to her left, the door slightly ajar and footsteps muffled by tattered carpet just audible above the rapid beat of her heart. If it pounded any harder she feared the trespasser might hear it, the hand that clutched her shawl to her chest feeling how it railed against her ribs. On the other side of that door lurked who knew what, perhaps a thief or perhaps something altogether more frightening, and the only way to know for sure was to push it open and look inside—
The first glimmer of light took her by surprise, flaring round the edge of the door frame and faintly illuminating the chilly hall. Surely nobody could be so brazen as to break into the Lodge and then light a fire, making themselves quite at home—could they? Hardly able to believe her eyes, Honora stiffened as the light grew stronger, the only explanation one she could hardly credit.
They’ve lit the candles? They’ve come into my house in the middle of the night, made a fire and lit my good candles? The ones I have to ration to last out the winter? How dare they!
A spark of temper erupted in her chest, warming her despite the cold draught that crept beneath the front door. Whoever this person was had gone too far in their arrogance and, with anger masking the fear of moments before, Honora gathered her courage and burst into the room.
‘You can stay exactly where you are!’
Honora held the pistol so firmly her knuckles stood out beneath the skin, aiming the muzzle squarely at the strange man kneeling before her fireplace. He started at her sudden appearance and made as if to stand, evidently reconsidering when she waved the flintlock threateningly.
‘One more step and it might be your last. You’ll tell me who you are and what you mean by skulking around here at this hour.’
The intruder settled slowly back down again on his haunches, never taking his eyes from Honora’s rigid face. His own features were difficult to read, although in the light of the dancing flames he didn’t look the least bit afraid, instead a decided jaw and straight chestnut brows set in an expression of complete composure. Honora might as well have been holding a bouquet of flowers for all his lack of concern and she felt a gleam of irritation that he was so unmoved. Did he think she was to be trifled with? That because he was handsome she would hesitate to run him off? She had to admit that particular fact, sour though it tasted.
The stranger’s dark eyes shone like deep pools in the firelight and his hair, scattered with sparse grey at the temples, was interestingly disordered. It was impossible to tell how tall he was as he crouched on the ground, but he looked around her age, perhaps a few years off forty, with a lean physique beneath expensive clothes that a much younger man would have been proud of. If Honora had seen him five years previously, she couldn’t deny he was the kind of man she might have slid a smile, but that was before Frank had taught her the error of her ways, and now she glared at the trespasser so coldly it was a wonder he didn’t turn to ice.
‘Well?’
‘I beg your pardon, ma’am.’ The man inclined his head in a gesture that Honora might have found apologetic if she’d been in a more forgiving mood. ‘I didn’t know you were here. When I saw the state of the place I thought for certain any inhabitants must have shut it up and moved on. I’ve travelled a long way and thought I’d pass the night here before continuing my search for the mistress in the morning.’
His gaze flickered towards the dingy curtains and a spreading patch of damp that left an ugly stain on the ceiling, and Honora felt herself prickle with sudden shame. It wasn’t out of any sort of kindness that Frank had allowed her to carry on living at Wycliff. In fact, quite the opposite. He just didn’t care. His complete indifference to her was present in every faded tapestry and broken pane as if he had forgotten she even existed, his apathy the only reason Honora hadn’t been thrown out like a pan of ash. Frank had better things to do, other places to live, and Honora doubted he ever spent as much as a moment considering the comfort of the unwanted wife he had left behind.
‘Of course I still live here. But who sent you? And you’ve yet to tell me your name.’
She redoubled her grip on the pistol, bringing her other hand up to cover the first. Even with the muzzle still pointed firmly in his direction the handsome man seemed quite at ease in a way that some part of her could have admired—a dangerous thought she dismissed without hesitation.
Don’t be ridiculous. As if arrogance and a half-decent face make the slightest bit of difference to this absurd situation.
‘My name is Lord Lovell, Mrs Blake. You are Mrs Honora Blake, I presume?’
At Honora’s curt nod he began to rise carefully to his feet, holding a steadying hand out towards her when she stiffened. ‘It’s on account of your husband that I visit you. We met at a card party about eighteen months ago, although it was only very recently I learned he was married.’
A swift punch of shock knocked some of the wind from Honora’s sails and she leaned back against the door frame, still holding the flintlock, but with suddenly less focus. The mention caught her entirely off guard, so unexpected she only half noticed her mysterious guest take a cautious step forward.
Frank had sent him?
He hadn’t bothered to contact her in three years, she thought now with one eye making sure the intruder—Lord Lovell? How fine Frank’s taste in friends has become!—didn’t come any closer. Ever since she’d answered Ma’s strained letter those three years previously Frank had been a ghost, disappearing as soon as he learned she had rejected the inheritance her grandfather had left her at his passing. She wanted nothing to do with that money, made on his tobacco plantations by the toil and suffering of slaves. Honora would rather be poor as a church mouse than accept wealth tainted by such cruelty, but Frank had disagreed. He’d been waiting for it to come to her and then to him by law—and when it didn’t there was nothing to keep him by his wife’s side, only the prospect of a hefty inheritance making it worth his while to stay in a marriage to a woman he had fooled into loving him with no hope of return.
Honora gritted her teeth, her jaw hardening in distaste. Of course Frank and this lord were friends. They were quite similar in a way, she saw now. Both so self-assured and comely enough to catch any woman’s eye. No doubt the man in front of her was just as good for nothing as her husband and she felt a sharp stab of dislike lance through her at the thought.
The last thing I want is a friend of Frank’s spending another moment in this house. Like attracts like, after all—no man of honour would pursue an acquaintance with my husband, no matter how high and mighty he might be.
‘If you expect me to be impressed by your title, I’m afraid you’ll be disappointed. Peer or not, you can’t go about breaking into other people’s homes, even if you do know the owner.’
Lord Lovell shrugged with the perfect confidence of a man accustomed to doing exactly as he liked, when he liked. ‘The garden door only needed the slightest persuasion. I said in the darkness this house looked uninhabited. You’ll have to forgive my mistake. I’m not sure it’s one I could be blamed for making.’
Fresh annoyance coursed through Honora. It was true Wycliff Lodge had seen better days, its decline starting long before Frank brought his heiress bride to England to be its mistress. By the time he left her Honora could do nothing to halt its sorry sinking, the once fine rooms growing dreary and cracks appearing in the outside walls. Only by renting out the handful of fields around the Lodge could she keep the wolf from the door, able to afford essentials but little else.
Ma and Pa would have sent money had she asked, but Honora never would. It would humble her to dust to admit how wrong she’d been about Frank, her stilted and infrequent letters home to Virginia skating over the details of a life she was now ashamed to own. The estrangement between her and her parents was an open wound that hurt her every day, but there was no way of healing it now without the miracle of turning back time.
‘That’s very well, but it doesn’t explain why you’re here. So, go on. Tell me.’ She knew her voice was hard, but she couldn’t seem to soften it. Between this aggravating stranger and memories of Frank her chest felt clamped in a vice and cold anger flowed through her like a stream. Hadn’t she been imposed upon enough by men who thought charm a fit substitute for morals? Frank hadn’t even bothered to come to see her himself, instead sending this man to scare her in the night and then insult her home. Surely Lord Lovell deserved no politeness, tainted by his association with one who had ruined Honora’s life.
‘What does my fool of a husband want so badly he dispatched you to seek me out? Is it money? He’s finally gambled away all of his and now he demands mine? I would hope not, for he knows full well I have none.’
Her unwanted visitor hesitated, for the first time looking unsure, and Honora could have found a grim smile that she had finally discomforted him. No doubt he was more used to women simpering and throwing him admiring glances, his title and admittedly engaging face finding favour wherever he went.
Well, not here and not from me. If Frank sent him, thinking I’d fall prey to his charms, he’ll be most put out to find me entirely immune—
Lord Lovell took another step towards her and Honora pulled back, all of a sudden wary at the new seriousness in his face. His brow was creased soberly and his already deep voice lowered when he replied, his words reaching Honora’s ears and yet hardly making any sense at all.
‘He’d have no need of money, ma’am. I’m sorry to tell you—your husband is dead.’
Isaac watched her fold slowly down on to a threadbare sofa near the door, all the bluster of seconds previous bleeding out, and he hardened his heart against a distant pang of sympathy. The pistol fell from her fingers to land with a soft thud on the floor, but she didn’t seem to notice, her now empty hand coming up to cover her mouth.
‘Frank? Dead?’
She stared up at him as though half suspecting he was lying, eyes wide and lips parted likewise with disbelief. In her anger she’d been impressive, but now in shock she looked almost vulnerable—although neither state one Isaac had any intention of admiring, under these circumstances or any other.
So. I’ve done as I determined I would and that’s as far as it goes.
A murmur of guilt nagged at him and he turned his face away, determined as ever not to consider it. He had no reason to feel that way and yet still it whispered to him as it had ever since that fateful night one week ago, its voice only intensified by the sight of Frank’s striking widow mere feet away from where he stood.
Damn you, Blake. Only revealing the fact you were wed as you lay dying? Leaving me the burden of locating and telling your wife? Perhaps you thought I’d show pity to a married man, but you left me with no choice but to act after what you did to Charlotte, whether you pleaded to be spared or not.
The wife in question sat quite still, sleep-tousled black curls shining in the dancing light of the fire that threw undulating shadows across her amber skin. She was far more attractive than he had expected and briefly Isaac wondered how Frank could have neglected such a unique beauty. His first glimpse of her had been unexpected to say the least. What kind of woman came flying into a room in her nightgown waving a pistol around? She’d been like a Valkyrie swooping down to challenge him, hardly seeming to feel any fear at all. Perhaps it was no wonder Frank had fled from her, that face beguiling but fire lurking behind its angelic façade. He hadn’t been a brave man, Isaac thought with a flit of contempt—probably his wife had been too much for him to handle, leading his attention to stray where it never should have...
The thought of poor Charlotte’s tear-stained face made his insides twist and he bit down on a growl as he recalled that terrible night. His young ward was so naive, far too sweet and guileless to have been exposed to a man like Frank Blake...but hadn’t Isaac believed Blake to be a friend to him, someone who could be depended on not to treat Charlotte as Isaac had to admit he himself had once treated other women?
Perhaps his conduct hadn’t been quite as bad as Frank’s, but the fact their friendship had begun with a chance meeting over a rowdy game of cards in some shadowy den, the wine flowing thick and fast and more than one pretty girl catching Lord Lovell’s approving eye, didn’t reflect well on either man. He couldn’t deny Frank had made him laugh with his quick wit and willingness to up the stakes of every game, sometimes playing until the sun rose, and that he’d been pleased to find a friend with whom it seemed he had so much in common...until the truth came out and with it a sense of shame for his rakish actions that Isaac had never felt before.
Charlotte was barely sixteen, damn it, scarcely more than a girl, and by who knew what coaxing Frank had got her with child, then had the gall when confronted to deny it was his. She hadn’t even known what was happening when she began to show, hiding her condition beneath loose-fitting gowns and fearing she was grievously ill until finally seeking Isaac’s help. What other choice had Isaac had when he discovered the truth but to chase the blackguard down, Frank running for his life but his weak heart close to bursting with every step? Only when he keeled over on the frosty lawn of Lovell’s estate, Marlow Manor, did he seem to realise his time had come, with his last breath pleading his married state as though Isaac might show him mercy on account of whatever wretched woman he’d wed.
But he deserved none. It’s only as a kind of penance for my own sins that I came to find this Mrs Blake, in some way to make amends for how I behaved before Charlotte was dishonoured by a man who held a mirror up to my own dealings. I see now how actions have consequences I should have considered. For Charlotte’s sake from now on I shall strive to do better.
He glanced at Honora, once again trying to take her measure. He’d been anticipating more of a scene and had steeled himself to weather whatever storm of weeping Mrs Blake might rage over his head. Surely most women would have fallen to pieces, he thought as he observed her narrowly, but no such emotion seemed forthcoming, her long lashes bone-dry and, now the first sharp shock had passed, her face settling into determined composure.
Very carefully he moved a little closer, expensive boots scuffing worn carpet. She glanced up at him, a swift suspicious thing that did nothing to dim the pretty hazel of her eyes, and not for the first time Isaac felt an unwelcome glimmer of appreciation for the elegant tilt of her chin.
Attractive. Unusually so. But enough to overcome all good sense? For a moment Isaac’s thoughts swerved in the direction of his late father and gave the answer he already knew without a shadow of a doubt.
Absolutely not.
If the previous Lord Lovell had taught his son anything it was the danger of getting too attached, a lesson Isaac had learned well—or too well, given how lightly he had always treated women, now to his lasting shame. Father had married again after the untimely passing of Isaac’s mother in childbed, when she had traded her life for that of her wailing son. The new marriage hadn’t been a joyful one and as he had grown it pained Isaac to see two lives so ruined by their ill-advised binding together, his childhood marred by shouting and sulks, arguments and bitter tears on both sides. As far as he could tell marriage was a recipe for disaster—sooner or later the arrangement would sour to indifference or rage, leaving behind sorrow that could have been avoided with the absence of a ring.
A wife would only tie him down, an unwanted responsibility likely to make him miserable in the end—he enjoyed female attention on his own terms, and there had never been any shortage of that. Only for the begetting of legal heirs was there much of a case for matrimony, but the knowledge he had caused his own mother’s death haunted Isaac like an unescapable spectre and always gave him pause whenever the dull matter of progeny crossed his mind. It was better to spare some poor creature the pain and danger of childbirth, he’d resolved years before—something he wished now he might guard Charlotte against, the idea of her sharing the fate of his mother making his blood run cold.
She was the only person in his life he truly cherished, after all, the only family he had left. The orphaned daughter of his late cousin, Charlotte had come to live with him as a sad child of just nine years old and he had grown to love her as if she were his own daughter, making her his sole heir and hiding from her the less admirable side of his character. Just as, he realised now with hideous hindsight, he should have concealed his choice of friends. The poor motherless girl would become a mother herself soon enough, with no idea how to go about it and nobody to guide her, and Isaac had nobody to blame but himself for allowing that to happen—apart, of course, from Frank Blake, whose name he had forbidden Charlotte from ever uttering again in his hearing or out and certainly never beneath the roof of Marlow Manor.
So, no. Honora’s loveliness would not be allowed to interest him and was certainly not enhanced by her connection to Frank. Association with such a character did nothing to prompt fondness, Frank’s conduct towards Charlotte souring any sympathy Isaac might have had for the wife left behind.
Still. Perhaps I ought to offer some consolation, no matter if I feel the world has suffered no great loss. It’s what she’ll be expecting, I suppose.
‘I’m very sorry to bring you such news. Do you want a glass of something to ease the shock?’
He caught the minute shake of Honora’s head, although whether it was to refuse his sympathy or the drink he couldn’t tell. She still held herself warily, mistrust clear in her every movement and her whole air entirely opposite to that of most ladies he met. Usually they warmed to him at once, his face and effortless charm drawing them in—although admittedly he wouldn’t often meet one for the first time in the middle of the night after walking uninvited into her house, then proceed to declare the death of her husband.
‘You needn’t attempt to remain stoic on my account, ma’am. I would not intrude upon your grief.’
The fact she hadn’t cried yet was...disquieting. She merely sat, hands folded neatly in her lap, and the green shawl draped around her shoulders shielding the slim lines of her figure from his reluctant gaze. If she had seemed the type to appreciate it he might have taken her hand and pressed her slender fingers, an action that usually prompted delighted flutters from its object. Instead Isaac swallowed down his unease as she slowly turned her head towards him, high cheekbones catching the light to throw her mouth into shadow.
‘You mistake me. It isn’t stoicism that renders me so quiet. I simply have no tears left to fall. My husband drained that particular river many years before and I ceased crying for him long ago.’
Isaac blinked, caught entirely off guard by her coldness. She was like a woman of fire and ice by turns. Her anger when she first leapt into the room might have burned another man and now her coolness was disconcerting, a contrast that confused him no end. Which was the real Honora Blake? And why was he suddenly, dangerously, struck by the desire to figure out the answer to that question?
‘How did it happen? I’d like to know that at least.’
Honora fixed him with a stare so direct Isaac almost looked away. It was no surprise she asked surely the most obvious of questions. She had the right to know, part of him insisted, but another held back.
Wouldn’t telling Honora exactly what had happened that night pour fresh disgrace down upon Charlotte’s already bowed head? She was beside herself with shame so deep it was agony for Isaac to witness, both for her pregnancy and for believing Frank’s lies that he had loved her, even still without knowing he had a wife tucked away in the south. If Isaac confessed he had chased Frank to his death, Honora would want to know why and nothing could persuade him to expose his ward to her contempt. Charlotte had already hidden herself away for her confinement and the baby would need to be explained somehow. For the sake of her precarious reputation the fewer people who knew the whole truth the better. Honora owed him no allegiance and there was nothing to stop her from spreading the tale far and wide should she wish, out of spite or who knew what other reason she might conjure.
‘It was his heart. He was calling on me at my home in Northamptonshire, Marlow Manor, and I’m afraid last week it gave out completely. There was nothing to be done.’
‘And the funeral?’
‘Small but proper. Only myself in attendance.’
The black curls gleamed again as she nodded, apparently lost in thought. What was running through her mind Isaac couldn’t say, although Honora showed no sign of suspicion and he felt an absurd flare of relief she didn’t question him further. Discussing the night Frank had died was something he would rather avoid and it felt something of a reprieve when she rose slowly to her feet and regarded him closely.
‘I still can’t say I’m delighted at your method of introduction, but I suppose I appreciate you coming to tell me in person.’
She glanced towards one curtained window where feeble daylight had yet to struggle through. It was difficult to know what time it was, but the shadows beneath her eyes suggested she slept poorly anyway and for the first time a spark of pity surfaced. Honora must have had a difficult time since her husband left and doubtless before that, too—but that was none of his concern. Whatever befell Frank’s discomfiting, unfriendly widow was none of his business, no matter how beguiling her countenance.
‘There’s a spare bedchamber upstairs, first room on the left. As you’re here you may as well make use of it. You’ll be more comfortable in there than in my parlour.’
He offered a short bow of thanks and she accepted it with a wordless dip of her chin before turning away, retrieving the pistol from the floor as she went. She moved with such purpose and dignity the idea of feeling sorry for her seemed suddenly misplaced, until she paused at the door and looked back, the tired resignation in her face sending a jolt through Isaac he didn’t understand.
‘Goodnight, Lord Lovell. I hope you sleep well—and don’t forget to extinguish those candles. I need them to last until spring.’
Copyright © 2020 by Joanna Johnson