Tansy had no idea what had caused the despair and anger visible on Sam’s face and in his eyes before he’d stomped out.
She should know.
He was one of her best friends and she’d been so focused on her own world, she’d missed something huge happening in his.
Another thing she could blame James Stephens for. She’d retreated into herself after learning he was using her. Dating her so he could steal her ideas.
What else had she missed during these past few months? She didn’t know, and she couldn’t fix anything until she did.
At least Sam was here, and she could fix what she’d messed up with him.
She’d thrown their wet clothes in the washing machine that was hooked up to the first lot of solar panels and their hiking boots were drying under a heat lamp. Tansy slipped on her snow boots and hoped that Sam had carried some other footwear in that duffle.
She didn’t see him on the deck or near the dock, so she moved around the lodge, not surprised to find him checking out her improvised scaffolding setup. In sneakers.
His body tightened as she approached and she hoped he wasn’t about to launch into another big brother lecture. One big brother was enough.
Could Sam ever see their relationship as anything else? She should make that into her new project. Once she figured out how to help him through whatever was hurting him now.
As she neared, Sam reached out and gripped the scaffolding. He gave it a shake, but nothing moved much.
Tansy slipped her arm through his and leaned into his shoulder. “See. I’m not reckless. It’s sturdy and safe.”
Sam grunted, but his body relaxed. “How long did it take you to rig this up?”
“About three days. I’m glad the basement and sheds were never cleaned out.”
“You built it from found materials?”
She hip-checked him. “Of course. New things are for the weak.”
That got her a smile along with a headshake. “New things follow codes and safety standards.”
Tansy shrugged. “This is perfectly safe, even for you. And I was able to reuse instead of adding more items for our landfills.”
Sam sighed and used his chin to point at her pulley system. “That too?”
“Yes. It was too cold for a clothesline when I started, so I took it apart. I’ll get that back together now that the roof is finished.”
Another soft grunt. “Mind if I go up?”
He enjoyed adventures as much as she did. “Not scared?”
He hip-checked her back. “Of heights? Not a chance. Of your building skills? Maybe a little.”
“Hey.”
With a smile, Sam patted her hand and released her to head up the scaffolding. She let herself enjoy the view for a moment before following him up.
She knew he would feel better knowing she’d been safe the whole time.
On the roof, Sam stood on one of the braces she’d made. Good to stand on to install the panels and to enjoy the view.
“I hope you were tied down.”
Tansy wasn’t able to stop the snort laugh.
Sam’s eyebrows shot up, and then he smirked, too. “You know what I meant.”
Were his eyes heating up? Or was he just laughing at her dirty mind?
“I rigged up a harness. I brought it down today because the panels are installed. I’m done up here.”
Sam nodded as he looked around. “It’s beautiful.”
Tansy nodded. “It sure is. The view always helps.”
His head whipped toward her. “Helps with what? What happened?”
She smiled. “I’m fine, Sam. It just helps.”
His look told her he didn’t believe her, but he didn’t push. Not while they were on the roof, anyway. Maybe she shouldn’t push either.
But she had to try something. “We’ll leave the scaffolding up for a bit. You might find it helps you, too.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Tansy sighed. “Something happened to you. Something bad. Probably related to your job. I can see it in your eyes. This little spot of peace might help.”
His eyes narrowed, but he didn’t answer. Instead, he turned back to the view.
She had a feeling that wasn’t what he was seeing.
Eventually, he shrugged and turned back to her. “Let’s head down. You have any food in this place?”
“Enough for maybe a couple of meals now that you’re here, but I’ll have to head into town soon.”
He nodded and they descended without conversation.
Once inside, she shucked her boots and put on the moccasins she’d bought from a local Abenaki artisan at a Phail craft show.
Sam wiped off his shoes but kept them on. He glanced at the coat rack, empty of their wet clothes.
“I’ve got them in the washing machine. Boots are under a heat lamp.”
He smiled. “So you do have some things hooked up to electricity?”
“Once I had a dozen panels in place, I got the washer and dryer hooked up. And the water heater. No one needs cold showers all the time.”
Oops. That sounded sexual. Not at all what she meant at the moment.
Sam hooted out a laugh and headed to the kitchen. “Let’s find food. Show me what you’ve been living on.”
He grabbed a slice of the bread she’d had earlier in the day for her sandwich.
“Not bad.”
“You can have a turn tomorrow. See if you can do any better.”
“You’re on.”
“I’ve got minestrone soup and some pasta that’s pretty good.”
He leaned against the counter. “You made it yourself, too?”
She shrugged and moved to the refrigerator. Another item she considered essential. “It’s fun to experiment.”
Sam moved to the hydroponic garden. “This is awesome. Show me how it works.”
“Let me stoke up the stove and get the soup warming first.”
He followed her into the main room, asking questions about the stove, her garden, her cooking.
They chopped up veggies to mix with the pasta and chatted about all things superficial.
Interesting, but superficial.
Soon they were seated by the pellet stove in a couple of mismatched chairs in front of the view of the lake. The small table in front of them held their soup and pasta.
“Is everything in this lodge fifty years old or more?”
Tansy laughed. “Well, I’ve upgraded to energy-efficient appliances and have plans for a few more, but a lot of it is definitely old.”
“Do you have plans?”
“I always have plans.” Which was true. But she wasn’t sure which ones she wanted to implement. Which direction she wanted to head next.
James had taken some of the joy out of the work she’d been doing. The lodge was bringing it back, but everything had changed.
She was changed.
And she wasn’t sure how deep that change ran.
Sam poked her in the shoulder. “Where’d you go, Tans?”
She gave herself a small shake. “Nowhere. Just got lost in thought.”
“Someone hurt you, Tansy. I can tell. You’re going to tell me who it was.”
Not a question. A demand.
Her warrior.
Tansy reached over and rubbed her hand over his forearm, trying in vain to ignore the muscles and the sensations the simple act of comfort sent through her.
“I’m fine. There’s nothing to take care of. There’s no one to intimidate, but if there is, you’re the first one I’ll call.”
Sam studied her. “Promise?”
“You’ll be my first call. Promise.”
Sam sat on the edge of the bed in the room he’d chosen. Next door to Tansy on the top floor.
The security in the place was shit. Something he’d be taking care of in short order.
The woman had no defenses in place other than a few deadbolts. Didn’t believe she needed any.
As if her black belts alone were enough to keep her safe.
He’d texted Joe an update on his sister and the lodge. Tansy was keeping her brother in the loop on the repairs, but she hadn’t been as open about the isolation she’d surrounded herself with.
As a leader of his Hostage Rescue Team in the FBI, Joe Cheveyo was away more than he was home. Home had been Sacramento for most of their lives, but that was changing.
This lodge at Midnight Lake was the impetus.
And it had Sam thinking of changing as well.
Losing Hayley Armstrong was potentially a deal breaker for him. He didn’t want to face that kind of loss again.
Over his years searching for missing kids, he’d had many more successes than failures. But the failures ate away at his soul.
Tansy was taking on a new challenge.
Maybe he should do the same.
Tansy was pulled in a bazillion directions all at the same time by that beautiful brain of hers.
His wasn’t pulling him anywhere except into a constant swirl of doubt and confusion.
Washed up at thirty.
Which made him grin. Self-pity wasn’t his thing.
Time to figure out what was going to be his thing. Back to the FBI after his leave was over or on to something new? A few ideas had taken hold over the years, but were they practical?
He had the perfect person to help him figure it out sleeping right next door. Unless she was doing those ridiculous wolf naps all the time.
While she would never admit to it, the wolf naps only happened when she was completely absorbed in a project and couldn’t bear to lose time to sleep. Or when she was stressed.
The woman could sleep anywhere. Floor, car, outside. Hell, she’d probably wolf napped on the roof while installing her panels.
Sam was too edgy for sleep yet, but he’d needed a few minutes away from Tansy to regroup and text Joe.
Something was definitely wrong, even if Tansy was pretending there wasn’t. She’d always liked alone time, but this complete isolation from people was new.
Her brain was constantly moving, and she needed alone time to process her thoughts and work on her ideas. But she’d always enjoyed family time with the Riveras. Like trouncing them at any and all strategy games.
Even though he, Nico, and Joe had been a couple of years older. Even though they’d all turned out to be fairly intelligent men with degrees and who worked for the FBI.
Maybe he could lull her into confiding her secrets by playing a game.
When he exited his bedroom, he saw that Tansy’s bedroom door was open, and the room was empty. He went on a search, taking a better look at the lodge on his way down.
Sturdy building. Furnished. With stuff from the sixties or earlier, but furnished.
Hardwood floors throughout.
Lots of bathrooms.
Could be a great B&B if that was something either of the Cheveyos were into. Which they weren’t.
Tansy wouldn’t have wasted the time, energy, or money on installing solar panels if she didn’t have a plan simmering for the place. She was the least wasteful person he knew.
As he walked through the spaces and studied the layouts, he could see all kinds of potential.
But no evidence of Tansy’s experiments. No projects half-finished or otherwise.
Maybe she was using the sawmill for those.
Even as he thought it, he discarded the idea. The mill was closer to civilization and potential interruptions. Tansy worked best in her forts.
Blanket forts and pillow forts in her old room had always separated her projects. She’d commandeered the area beneath the dining room table more than once.
Curiosity had him poking his nose into every room and discarding them as her personal labs.
A quick tour of the main level living spaces showed nothing either.
The basement stairs were off the kitchen, so he headed that way, not surprised to find lights on.
Not wanting to scare Tansy, he thumped down the stairs, giving her lots of notice of his arrival.
“There’s no lake to fall in down here. You don’t have to do a hippo walk.”
“Hippo walk? That’s insulting.”
Her laugh reached him from the bottom, and he continued down normally.
“Just something I was thinking about earlier. Can’t sleep?”
“It’s only ten o’clock. Where are you?”
The basement was packed with the detritus of the past hundred years.
From what he could see, the space was divided by tall shelves, all packed with crates and boxes and piles of stuff.
No way could this be her fort, either. Way too much stuff to get in the way.
“Four aisles to the right.”
Sam wove his way around barrels and boxes until he found the fourth aisle. Tansy stood on her tiptoes with a flashlight aiming at the shelf above her head.
“What are you looking for?”
She sent him a wry grin, and he laughed.
“You lost your phone again?”
Tansy nodded. “I think I had it last down here.”
“When was that?”
She dropped to her feet. “Yesterday. Maybe.”
No wonder Joe was after Sam for updates. She was the worst with her phone.
Sam sighed and checked out the shelf she’d been trying to see. No phone. “What were you doing down here? What were you looking at?”
Tansy turned her face away from him. “Just checking out what was down here.”
Plausible. Almost believable. Except for the fact that she always turned away when she didn’t want to lie.
“Tansy.”
Her head dropped slightly as she puffed out a breath. “I was trying to decide how to answer a couple of emails.”
“From?”
She turned to check out the nearby shelves. He searched the ones she couldn’t reach.
“The Department of Defense wants me to make some things for them.”
That wasn’t surprising. “You going to do it?”
She shrugged. “Depends. I sent them back some conditions. We’ll see if they agree.”
“What conditions?”
That earned him a grin. “A guarantee of consequences if any of my creations get turned into weapons or used for anything other than their original purposes.”
He laughed. “Smart girl. What else?”
“What do you mean?”
He kept in the sigh. “You said emails. Plural.”
“Just some stuff from back in Sacramento.”
Which she obviously didn’t want to talk about. He’d try a different tack.
“I take it that’s connected to why you decided to move to this property you’ve had for over a year.”
Tansy shrugged and moved around to the next aisle. This one looked to be filled with tools and buckets of screws and nails, bits and pieces of wood.
He picked up a chisel set probably passed down to her grandfather. “Looks like you come by your reuse-it philosophy from your grandfather’s side.”
Tansy smiled. “Koko was definitely a big influence. I remember him talking about how to listen to the planet, how the spirit of the planet was there, waiting for us to listen.”
“And you’ve heard it ever since.”
Her smile lit up the space. “He was a great man. A great teacher.”
“You miss him.”
She nodded and ran her fingers over the shelves. “I do. We video chatted all the time. He wanted Joe and I to live with him after, well, after.”
After her parents had been killed.
“He and the Riveras talked and decided we’d stay in California. Stick with the same school and friends we had. But he was still involved in all the decisions.”
“I remember. He was always telling those corny jokes.”
Tansy laughed. “Why did the bike fall over?”
Sam waggled his eyebrows. “It was two tired.” He pointed his finger at her. “Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil?”
“Because it’s pointless.”
They wandered to the next aisle, swapping bad jokes they remembered.
Tansy stopped when she reached a box of old hunting clothes. Camouflage shirts and bright orange vests.
Her face changed. Tightened.
He knew she was against hunting. She didn’t eat meat under any circumstances. But this was something else.
Something in the box was triggering her.
“What is it?”
Tansy blinked, and her face was back to neutral. Except he could see past the façade.
“I was looking in this area yesterday. My phone must be here.”
They both looked down, and she spotted it sticking out from the bottom shelf. Where she’d obviously dropped it.
Because of something in the box? Or because of something associated with it?
Tansy snatched up her phone and headed to the stairs, demeanor cheerful. And fake.
Sam looked through the box quickly. He found nothing but musty old camouflage.
Now he had to figure out what it meant.