Thursday
February 8
It’s almost one in the morning, and I’m lying in bed beside Chace. He hasn’t left my side since I was grabbed. I think he feels guilty, as if it was his fault.
He’s been asleep for an hour, and I can’t take my eyes off his face. He’s the only thing holding me together right now. I don’t want to think too much about what happened or what Jake’s note could mean. So I focus on Chace’s features: the way his dark lashes create a shadow on his cheeks in the dim moonlight, how his lips pout slightly as he sleeps.
My hand itches to reach out and touch his hair. It looks so soft. I thought I was going to faint when he insisted on staying the night with me. I think he’s worried that Jake will come for me.
I am too.
When we headed to bed, Chace wasted no time stripping down to his boxers. Thankfully, his back was to me, because I was openly gawking. I excused myself and went to the bathroom to change into my pajamas. The nice silk ones, obviously.
His muscular arm is over my stomach and has been for about ten minutes. It’s maddeningly intimate—and the only reason I’m not obsessing about Jake.
Instead I’m lying here, wide awake, obsessing about Chace.
I need help.
He shifts onto his side, and he’s suddenly very close. I hold my breath.
Oh my God, wake up and kiss me!
Biting my lip, I close my eyes tightly. This is torture. Pure, beautiful torture.
“Lylah?” he whispers my name.
I must look like totally insane with my eyes squeezed shut, chewing on my lip. When I open my eyes, Chace is gazing at me.
“You good?” he asks, his voice deep from sleep.
“Fine. Just having a hard time falling asleep.” I can still feel Jake’s breath on my shoulder right before his teeth bit into my skin. They did swab it for evidence, but now we have to wait for the results.
“You’re overthinking.” It isn’t a question. He knows I am. It’s a relief he thinks it’s about Jake though.
He tugs me into his arms and holds me tight against his chest. His very, very naked chest. “Sleep, Lylah,” he murmurs against my forehead.
His toned chest is hard under my palm. I’m not getting rest anytime soon. I can feel Chace’s heart thumping fast and loud. Mine feels the same way.
After a while, his body relaxes. He must have drifted off. His breathing lulls me, and I succumb shortly after.
• • •
Last night, being held by Chace was exactly what I needed, but this morning, it’s like it never happened. I’m in the kitchen with Detective Lina, and Chace is still sleeping in my bed. It’s early, and I’m freaking out about going to class today.
“Do you think I should leave town? If I’m the one who hurt him, maybe he’ll stop channeling his hate to everyone in my life.”
With a sympathetic smile, Detective Lina rests her arms on the table. “You may be the focus of his rage and obsession, but you’re not the only one he is targeting.”
“But do you think he would leave my friends alone and try to find me instead?”
“I think he’s more likely to get angry and lash out, maybe start spree killing. If I thought you leaving would help the case, I would have suggested it by now. You said you prefer to keep busy, so go to class as normal, but at no point will you be alone.”
With a nod, I get up. I focus on something I can control—my rumbling stomach.
Once I’ve eaten and dressed, I head out with two cops in tow. Jake grabbing me yesterday has left me on edge, jumping at shadows. He’s unlikely to try anything while I have protection with me.
I hope.
It’s still as cold as the South Pole, but the sunshine makes it more bearable. Campus is up ahead; I can see the brick library from here.
“Lylah?”
Tensing at the sound of my name, I turn my head to the side. I’m poised to run, adrenaline coursing through my veins. But it’s not Jake.
“Zak.” My shoulders relax. “How are you?” I ask, stepping closer to him.
He raises his eyebrow.
“Dad and Sarah are waiting for me, but can we meet later?”
His question catches me off guard. I didn’t expect him to want to meet up. Does he know what happened last night?
I hesitate, then say, “Sure. When and where?”
“The Bar? We’ll be able to talk, but it’s not so quiet that we’ll be overheard. Say…at nine?”
“You know I’ll have a cop with me, right?” If he wants to talk without anyone around he’s going to have to find someone else because I can’t do that.
“Of course. I wouldn’t want you walking around with no protection, Lylah.”
“Okay. Well, then, I’ll see you there.”
Zak nods and without another word, walks away. He doesn’t look back.
I carry on to the library and spend an hour making notes. Well, I sit at a table for an hour. Ten minutes is dedicated to studying, and the rest of the time, I try to ignore people’s stares while wondering what Zak wants to talk about and glancing from door to door in case Jake came in, making sure the cops shadowing me are alert and also watching the door.
But Jake wouldn’t come here. Too out in the open.
Eventually, I shove my things back in my bag and throw it over my shoulder. The undercover cops are right there with me, rising to their feet and following me like a dogs.
We walk home in silence. These cops aren’t that talkative, but that could be because they’re concentrating on the task at hand. I would find it distracting if someone was constantly talking to me while I was working, so I don’t try to engage in small talk.
We get home in minutes because I’m walking so fast.
One cop follows me inside, while the other joins the detail in a car outside our house.
Chace and Sienna are the only ones home. I find Chace in the living room. He’s sitting on the sofa starting at the TV. The TV is off.
“Chace?”
He looks up and smiles. “You’re back.”
“Looks like it.” I sit down next to him. “You’re watching a blank screen. Anything you want to talk about?”
Chuckling, he shakes his head. “Did you get much done?”
“Nope. We’re still the talk of the campus. I’m considering handing out Polaroids so people don’t have to stare. But I did run into Zak. I’m meeting him at The Bar tonight.”
Chace’s face falls. “You’re going out with Zak?”
“No, not like that. He asked me to meet him at The Bar. I think he’s having a real tough time.”
“Why did he ask you and not someone else?”
I frown at his question. “Because I’m the only one who doesn’t treat him like his brother’s actions are his fault. You’re hardly understanding, any of you. And I imagine his dad and sister are still really emotional about Jake.”
The last time I spoke to Zak may have ended in a public argument, but none of my anger or frustration was aimed at him. His sister is the one who had gotten to me.
“So they should be. He’s ruined people’s lives—he’s taken people’s lives.”
“Chace, stop. That has nothing to do with Zak, and he is in pain too. Why are you being like this?”
“Like what?”
“Argumentative.”
“I’m not. Go out with whomever you like, Lylah. I don’t care!” He stomps off, his footsteps thudding away from me.
What just happened?
Chace doesn’t usually say one thing and mean another, but the way he said that was not at all convincing.
I bite my lip. Oh my God! He’s jealous! Suddenly I don’t really mind that he’s stormed off.
Is it wrong to find that adorable?
“Why’re you smiling like a fool?” Sienna asks, walking into the room and looking back in the direction where Chace ran off.
“No reason. I need to take a shower before I go out later!” I practically skip upstairs like I’m tipsy already.
• • •
When I get to The Bar, Zak is already there, sitting at a table along the wall. After last night, I don’t really want to be out, but I do want to talk to Zak. He has a right to know what’s going on. And a right to know that I don’t blame him for what his brother has done. Detective Alexander is with me tonight, and I won’t be straying far from his side.
Zak smiles when he sees me.
I sit down. “Hey.”
“How are you, Lylah?”
“That’s a loaded question.”
He winces. “Sorry.”
“Has anyone been by to talk to you about…recent events?” I ask him, wondering if he already knows what happened to me.
Shaking his head, he scoots forward on his seat. “What’s he done?”
“You believe it’s Jake now?” I ask, my voice unable to hide my surprise.
Zak’s eyes drop. “I don’t want to, but…I have doubts about him. Things don’t add up. The profile for the killer—being strong and having medical knowledge or training—it all points toward my brother.”
I give him a sympathetic smile. That can’t be easy for him.
I recount what happened, and Zak’s mouth falls open. He slumps. His eyes briefly dart to the cop behind me, like he’s unsure if he should talk in front of him. Detective Alexander’s not going anywhere, so he’s going to have to learn to relax around him.
He doesn’t move and doesn’t talk as I ramble on and on about what happened, going over parts more than once, for a solid twenty minutes.
Clearing his throat when I stop talking, he asks, “Were you hurt? God, I have so many questions. I don’t really know where to start.”
“Yeah, that’s how I feel most of the time. It’s like Jake hates us all. I know he left college, but I didn’t think he had that kind of animosity.”
“My dad and I have been going through each moment we spent with Jake since he moved back home,” Zak started. “I can’t help thinking we’ve missed something big. A clue to his grand plan or hint to where he could be. I don’t know. I’m driving myself up the wall trying to remember our conversations. Maybe if I’d read between the lines… But nothing sticks out.”
“There might not have been any clues, Zak. These aren’t exactly the sort of plans you share.”
“No, I know. I’m just trying to do something useful, you know?”
“We feel pretty useless. Do you still plan to stay in town until he’s found?”
Zak nods and sits back in his seat. “I can’t go home yet. Besides, the cops have turned our house upside down and none of us are ready to deal with that.”
“Do you and Sarah both live with your dad still?”
Chuckling, he shakes his head. “No, I’m the only loser here.”
My eyes widen. “I wasn’t insinuating that you’re a loser.”
“I’m kidding. I was renting a place, but the landlord wanted to sell, so I’m back home until I find another apartment.”
“What was Jake’s plan after he dropped out?” I ask, moving the subject back to the information I wanted to find out. “He only told us that college wasn’t for him, and he was going home to consider his options.”
“I don’t think he had a plan. It was obvious that he regretted leaving. All he ever wanted to do was practice medicine, so I wasn’t buying his change-of-heart bullshit. But he wouldn’t admit that something else changed his mind.”
“That something being me?”
“I don’t know. We assumed he wasn’t doing as well as he’d hoped and maybe needed some time off. He was going to live at home and get a job for a while. Jake didn’t have money. Hell, he had a student loan. That’s what I don’t get. How is he affording to live? Where is he staying? How does he know how to kill the streetlights on campus? How does someone who went to school to learn to save lives start taking them instead?”
“No idea.” I shake my head solemnly.
We sit with our own thoughts for a few minutes before I break the silence.
“We should get a drink. After last night, I could really use one.”
“Vodka soda, right?”
I grin. “Ah, you remembered.”
“Hard to forget when you almost threw up on my feet after a night of drinking them.”
Cringing, I watch Zak get up and go to the bar. It must have been the last time Zak visited before Jake dropped out. I had one too many—rather, six too many—and threw up on the walk home. It was horrific, and I was so embarrassed. I’ve never allowed myself to get that drunk again.
I turn to look at Detective Alexander. He’s nearby at the bar, sitting on a stool, drinking a Coke. His gaze is mostly on me, but he’s also watching the crowd. His job must suck. I’d be bored stiff sitting there for an hour doing nothing.
Zak returns a few minutes later. It’s ten, so most of the students have moved on to the clubs. I definitely prefer The Bar when it’s quieter.
“Thanks.” I take my drink and sip. “A double?”
“My brother pulled you down an alley. I figured I owed you a double.”
“You owe me nothing, but thank you. Are you still working for that motorcycle shop?”
“Yeah, still selling cool bikes to uncool men embracing their midlife crises.”
“Ah, in a few years time, I’ll send my brother your way. He’s definitely headed for an early midlife crisis.” It wouldn’t surprise me actually; Riley’s had to be a proper grown-up far too early in his life. At the tender age of twenty-one, he inherited a teenager.
I take another sip. God, I needed this drink.
Zak laughs. “Definitely send him my way. You should come too. I’ll take you for a ride on the back of my bike.”
“I’m pretty sure I’d be awful on the back of a bike. Seriously, if you were to lean I’d probably go the other way.”
“Yeah, that’s not good.”
“But I would love to see the lake by your home. It looks gorgeous in the photos Jake used to show me.”
“That’d be great. I probably wouldn’t tell Sarah though.”
“Does she still think Jake is innocent?”
“The evidence has been stacking up, so as much as we hate to admit it, we all believe you. Jake has done a great job of concealing his true feelings. He was reapplying for college and planned to go north to finish his degree. I found the brochures at our holiday home when I had to let the police in to search it. I thought he’d lost everything, but he was rebuilding.”
I frown. “He was?”
Zak nods. “Yeah. Maybe he thought he could pick up his life after… I don’t know. Getting inside his head is after recent events is, frankly, impossible.”
Jake was supposed to have lost everything. That was the reason he wanted us dead. The anniversary of my rejection the trigger. Someone who’s lost it all and only wants revenge doesn’t plan their future. At least I don’t think they would. Now, nothing makes sense.
But Zak is probably right. Jake was likely using starting over as a cover.
I spend another thirty minutes with Zak before heading home.
• • •
The house is super quiet when I let myself in. Detective Alexander left me at the door after making sure I got inside safely. It’s now up to the cops outside on patrol to protect us.
“Where is everyone?” I ask Charlotte as I plop down on the sofa. She’s curled up watching TV.
“Gone out.”
My eyes widen. “Are they all together?”
Charlotte shakes her head. “Nope. Sienna’s with other friends, Isaac’s with some girl at a bar, and Chace met up with…some guys? I can’t remember who. Detective Lina was not amused that we’ve all gone in different directions tonight and they’ve had to send out extra cops to accompany everyone.”
I’m not surprised that Chace has gone out, and I’m not bothered that he’s out with friends—particularly since he seemed jealous of the time I was spending with Zak.
“Well, she wants us to carry on like normal,” I said. As if that’s possible. We can all keep getting out of bed and leaving the house, but nothing is normal.
“That’s exactly what Chace said. How was your night?” she asks.
“It was fine.”
“Really? Was it not weird being out with Zak?”
I shrug and sink back into the cushions. “Why would it be? He wants Jake caught too. Imagine what it would be like to have a killer in your family. I feel bad for him.”
“So that’s the reason you went out tonight?”
“Not the only reason. Zak is cool. We all used to get along before Jake turned psycho.”
“I wish I could still see Zak in the same light, but I can’t. I used to think he was okay. He always made sure to ask how I was and how school was going when he visited. It was awkward being around him and his family at the police station. I don’t know what to say.”
“He’s still the same person. You can talk about anything with him, except accusing him of doing something wrong. He’s no more guilty in this than any of us.”
“Yeah, I’ll probably just avoid him until this is over and he goes back home.”
Laughing, I nod. “That’ll work too. What have you been doing then?”
“TV. I don’t have a social life, remember?”
“That’s because you spend your evenings in front of the TV!”
Charlotte is about to reply when there’s a loud knock on the front door. We both startle.
“Girls, it’s Detective Alexander. We need to come in.”
We?
I get up, and Charlotte lunges for my hand. “He said we! Who’s with him?”
“We won’t know if we sit here!”
I peer through the window, then open the door.
“Zak!”
Zak is leaning on the detective. His head is bleeding. I gasp. “Oh my God, what happened?”
“It was Jake,” Zak rasps.