MARK DIDN’T have a lot to pack, but filling his suitcases was bittersweet. In one way he was glad to be leaving his cramped accommodation, not that he’d spent that much time there during the last month, but in another, it meant he would be leaving Basel—and he didn’t know how long it would be before he returned for good.
Steffen handed him the last pile of clothes to be packed. “I know you wished Kaz could be more definite, but I believe she is trying her best.”
“Yeah, well, a vague job offer, if they can sort out the paperwork and agree on a timeline with Reading to release me, wasn’t the ringing endorsement I was hoping for.”
“We talked about this.”
Mark sighed. He should have been happy that Kaz was willing to fight for him, but until he had a signed contract and concrete plans, he wouldn’t count his chickens. “I know. If they can’t sort something within three months, then I’ll start looking elsewhere in earnest. I just wish I knew. I hate all this uncertainty.”
“I do too. We need to be patient.”
He slammed shut his suitcase. “I hate the idea that tonight I will be back in the UK, on my own, when all I want is to be here with you.”
Mark let Steffen pull him to his feet and into his arms. They’d spent the morning in bed, making as much of their final day as they could, and he had left the last of his packing as long as possible, but he couldn’t put it off any further, and he would need to leave for the airport soon. He melted into Steffen’s arms. A month ago, he’d been positive he’d be leaving morose and brokenhearted because there would be no way Steffen could return his feelings. Now he was upset and angry because he was having to leave the man who loved him back.
“Remember that I feel the same. That this is finite. We will be together. In two weeks, you will be back here, and I have already booked my flight for two weeks after that.” Steffen gently kissed him, a whisper of lips that spoke of promises. “Now we know Kaz is trying, I will also speak to people. It will not hurt to let your management know I would consider them making a timely, right decision regarding you a personal favor to me.”
“No, Steffen, I don’t think you should do that. Things are moving in the right direction, and I don’t want people to think I have this job because of you.”
“Mark, no one will think that. It will become obvious sooner than later that we are together—people will realize why you chose to return to Basel.”
He supposed Steffen had a point. Mark wouldn’t ask him to support him financially, but maybe this was different. Perhaps he was naïve enough to believe this wasn’t how things worked, but he shouldn’t be too proud to let Steffen oil the gears a little.
“Just don’t overdo it. There’s one thing people knowing we’re together, there’s another them thinking I’m your boy toy.”
Steffen snorted. “Please, you are all of four years younger than me. If I were to get a boy toy, I would get one in his early twenties—you are far too old for that.”
“It’s this sort of sweet-talking I’m going to miss the most. I’m not sure why I am bothering.”
“Because I am great in bed and love you enough to put up with your strange English mannerisms.”
“Oi!”
“I will need to come up with an incentive scheme to improve your German and train you to speak properly.”
Fuck, he was going to miss this man. Not just the physical aspects of sex and being cuddled, but the way their personalities clicked and their humor dovetailed. Life wasn’t fair, but at least he was still in the game. It might need to be a longer session, but they’d get there, and they would win.
“I need to get going,” Mark said, not wanting to go.
Steffen took the lift down with Mark’s bags to load up the car he had borrowed as Mark did one final sweep of the room and dropped his key back with reception. It might not have been the best place he’d ever stayed, but he would have fond memories of the little room and Steffen’s moaning about his circumstances, the ridiculous man having no idea what living in poor conditions really meant.
Apart from the occasional taxi, Mark had barely traveled by car in Basel, and like the last time Steffen had driven him somewhere, he almost got in the wrong side, automatically going to the left as a passenger would for a British car. He grumbled under his breath and got in the right side. He tried to shake off his black mood, but despite Steffen doing his best to console him, Mark lapsed into a silent sulk.
“Mark, please, we are both unhappy at this, but we have only a little time before I put you on a flight.”
Steffen was right, and Mark knew he was being a selfish arse. “I’m sorry. Look, tell me what you’re doing this week. You must have something planned, you usually do.”
“I always have appointments and invitations. Mostly I refuse them. But I think I will need to be entertained this week, and although I can easily fill more hours with work, it will not benefit either of us. I will attend Amelia’s gallery opening for one of her pet painters and see a friend who is celebrating a new job.”
Mark was glad to hear it. He already thought Steffen worked too much, and he didn’t like the idea that both of them would be moping. He’d look up a couple of mates in Reading, see his family, but he knew initially he’d want to do little more than sulk. Hardly the most adult approach, and he knew he would get it in the neck from his sister. “You’re not to have too much fun without me.”
Steffen chuckled as he pulled into a car parking space, choosing one as close to the terminal building as possible. “Do not worry, I will behave myself. You should be more concerned that my mother wants to arrange a big family dinner during one of your visits.”
“At least she likes me,” he said.
“Small mercies. If she had not, I would not have heard the last of it.”
“Mums are the same the world over. My sister opened her big mouth, so now my mum is hassling me for information about you by email.” Mark knew it was only a matter of time before he told all, but for now he wanted to be a bit selfish about Steffen. He didn’t want to share him yet, but would have to at least tell them his plans. “I daresay I’ll let her know you’re not so bad.”
“I will not hide you from the rest of the family for long. You will have to meet my father and siblings, but not on your next visit, as I doubt I will let you out of bed for the duration. But you will not escape the dinner.”
“I’m sure you can find a way to put it off a little longer.”
“You have met my mother. If you believe I am capable of misdirecting her, you overestimate my talents.”
The drive to the airport had been too short for his liking, and Mark couldn’t sit here any longer. He needed to drop his bags and then get through security in order not to miss his flight. “You don’t need to come in.”
“If you think I will drop you here and leave, you are mistaken.”
“The parking will cost a fortune.”
Steffen unbuckled his seat belt. “I think I can cover it. Come on.”
Mark was glad Steffen had insisted. He’d made the offer, but he hadn’t wanted Steffen to leave him and drive off without a backward glance. “If you insist.”
The bag drop area for British Airways was busy, but he’d seen worse at other airports. At least his company had thought to book him a business-class seat, meaning he’d have no issue with his luggage, and he intended to hit the free booze as hard as the cabin crew would let him.
Bags dropped, they walked in silence to the escalator that led to security, but stopped at the bottom. Steffen pulled him close. “Call me when you land.”
Mark kissed him hard, trying to convey in one kiss his love and regret that he had to leave. “I love you.”
“And me you. It is not forever, and I will see you soon, even though it will feel like an age. We will get through this. Tag für Tag. Day by day.”
They shared another kiss, and Mark stepped away. “See you soon.”
With a quick final kiss, he pulled his rucksack onto his shoulder and rode the escalator, leaving Steffen behind. Steffen was right, it wasn’t forever, and Mark would do everything in his power to get back to Basel and Steffen as soon as physically possible.