I wrapped my large fuzzy robe around my body and slid my feet inside my slippers. I couldn't have wiped the smile from my face if I'd wanted too. I don't know when the hell it happened and I'd damn sure tried to prevent it but I was in love with my husband. Without a doubt. All I wanted to do this weekend is take care of him. I wanted to pamper him so that when I was gone I'd be as deeply embedded in his mind as he was in mine. I looked on the kitchen counter and saw a piece of paper. I was happy to see it was the grocery checklist I'd submitted when we'd set up our weekend visit. During each conjugal visit prisoners had two choices,they could have meals sent down from the prison kitchen, a guest meal would be sent for an additional fee. There was also a choice to for a hefty fee of course, submit a grocery list so that you could prepare the meals yourself. Without a doubt I had chose that option. Besides I knew without asking Terrence would want a break from the lousy prison food he'd been eating. During our short time together, I already knew Terrence kept plenty of money on his books so that he could buy food and snacks offered in the commissary. Terrence provided me with more than enough money to take care of anything we needed. So I'd paid two hundred and fifty dollars for our weekend groceries. During our phone calls I'd pried his favorite foods out of him so I'd know what to put on the list. Tamera had even given me the recipe for her baked ziti and Italian sausage recipe which apparently was one of his favorite dishes. I'd even given the recipe a practice run at home just to make sure I didn't mess it up. I wasn't a bad cook but a lot of my meals were eaten out due to being so busy studying,sewing, working and sleeping. Lucky for me Tamera loved to cook or I'd never have a home cooked meal.
I finished up in the kitchen, damn it's already eleven. Two hours already gone from my time with my husband.
Terrence walked into the kitchen, “ You need any help?”
I turned and was speechless. I'd imagined him a million times dressed in actual clothes and I already knew he was fine but DAMN! All I'd brought him were jeans,t-shirts and sweat pants. I couldn't imagine him needing anything more than that during the weekend. After all it wasn't as if we'd be leaving the trailer to do anything but those small changes made a world of difference in how Terrence looked. He smelled delicious and his chocolate skin glistened. His entire demeanor seemed to have changed. Lord have mercy this nigga know he's fine as hell.
Terrence laughed at the expression on my face.
“ Oh don't get it twisted baby. Your husband is fine. Don't let the orange jumpsuit fool you.”
I recovered quickly, “ You ain't cute.” I said rolling my eyes and turning my back to him. Shit I had to catch my damn breath!
“And don't you play. Your wife is fine too shit...,”
“ I know she is or she wouldn't be my wife. What do I look like giving up my money and my name to some ugly ass friend of my sisters? Nah,it wouldn't have gone down like that baby.” Terrence said smiling.
“ How is Tamera?” Terrence asked sitting down at the table.
“ She's good. We're coming together next weekend to see you.”
“Okay, I miss her. I'm still mad you told her.”
“ Don't start Terrence. Tamera is like a sister to me. How would it look for me to lie to her? Tamera was cool about it. She hasn't even really asked about what's going on between us actually. I know she misses you too. Umm,Terrence I think she's in touch with your mom...,”
“ I don't want to talk about my mom Dana.”
“ Terrence she's your mom. At some point you need to talk to her don't you think? Besides, how many times over the last few months have you told me one of the main things you wanted between us was honesty,trust and communication? But the first real issue that comes up you wanna cut me off? That's not right. I tell you everything. Even when I don't want to you get it out of me.” I said crossing my arms.
“ Sit down Dana. Look I know how it may sound being that she is my mother and believe me, I don't blame anyone for the position I'm in or the things I've done. I had to grow up at an early age to do the things my mom acted liked she couldn't do. The only way I'm going to be willing to get on speaking terms with my mom is for her to get her shit together and to not need me. Trust me when I say, as a son I've paid my dues and I'm not doing it anymore.
The only reason she's probably in touch with Tamera so much right now is because she knows Tamera has access to some of my money and she needs some. Period. I told her when I was going through all my court shit to start preparing to take care of herself. That was an entire year before I got locked up Dana.”
I could see pain and frustration all over his face just discussing the matter with me.
“I don't mind telling you Dana because regardless of our situation you are my wife. I want...no I need someone I can trust. Someone I can lean on too you know? I ain't never had anyone I can lean on. I've been taking care of people since I was 15. I'm ready to be selfish. I want my needs met for a change. You're not the only one who's getting something out of our marriage. I put away a nice amount of money while I was out there on those streets. Plus I already got some shit poppin' for when I get out. Am I proud of what I did to get it? No. At the same time I'm not necessarily ashamed of it either. It is, what it is as far as I'm concerned but with that being said. I made it,it's mine and when I get out I have more than enough for us to start our life together. I've been thinking a lot about what direction I want to go when I get out. None of those things include having anyone,family or not riding on my coat-tails. Do you know what I mean? And Dana,you already broke my trust once before we got married and telling Tamera about us. Please don't do it again. I wont forgive you the next time.” Terrence said. He really hoped Dana knew he was dead ass serious about that shit too. Terrence was letting it slide since technically it was before they exchanged vows.
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