An Idle Thought

I’m never going to sleep

with Martin Amis

or anyone famous.

At twenty-one I scotched

my chance to be

one of the seductresses

of the century,

a vamp on the rise through the ranks

of literary Gods and military men,

who wouldn’t stop at the President:

she’d take the Pentagon by storm

in halter dress and rhinestone extras,

letting fly the breasts that shatter

crystal—then dump him, too,

and break his power-broker heart.

Such women are a breed apart.

I’m the type

who likes to cook—no,

really likes it; does the bills;

buys towels and ties;

closes her eyes during kisses:

a true first wife.

The seductress when she’s fifty

nobody misses, but a first wife

always knows she’s first,

and the second (if he leaves me

when he’s forty-five) won’t forget me

either. The mention of my name,

the sight of our son—his and mine—

will make her tense; despite

perfected bod, highlighted hair

and hip career, she’ll always fear

that way back there

he loved me more

and better simply

for being first.

But ho:

the fantasy’s unfair to him,

who picked me young and never tried

another. The only woman he’s ever left

was his mother.