Persistent Perseverance

Jeanette got married to Michael, an even-tempered gentleman, as he was entering college to pursue a law degree. She never went to college because she landed a good job in the city after high school. She worked in the private sector at a financial institution, in a position that looked very promising for the development of her career.

Jeanette also saw opportunities at work for securing desperately needed loans to advance her family economically. She could borrow from the bank to purchase a house, land, car, furniture and other things. She was excited and motivated to work hard and advance her family in the best ways possible.

As she was earning a decent salary, Jeanette and Michael started a family immediately. They hired a nanny to stay at home with their young children while she worked and he pursued his studies. He chose not to reside on campus, but at home with his family, so they could be together in the evenings and on weekends.

Michael did not need to pay tuition, because the government of the day did so for all students who qualified and wished to pursue higher education then. This created an incentive given that very few young people aspired to go to college, and that many bright and eager students from poor families would have otherwise been deprived of a college education.

Michael’s other financial needs were taken care of by his soft-spoken, humble, hard-working and caring wife. She paid rent, bought food, paid utility bills, bought clothing, took care of transportation and gave him pocket money. In his spare time, Michael played his guitar, and listened to records and audio-cassettes of music he loved, often with friends.

Michael was also a member of Moral Rearmament, a movement of high school and college boys and girls all over Africa in the late sixties, involved in the awakening of the continent to perception through nationalistic songs. They travelled to Addis Ababa, the headquarters of Organization of African Unity and New York, the headquarters of United Nations to make their voices heard internationally; and dressed in bold, colourful African prints to reflect their origins and cause.

Nonetheless, Michael future in terms of job security and prosperity was unknown. As he continued with his studies, the couple had three children, and after graduating they had three more children, in total three boys and three girls.

Jeanette had a female cousin who one day during a visit with Jeanette said to her, “Jeanette I have something to tell you, but please do not get me wrong. I hate having to tell you this, but my conscience cannot sit well with me till I tell you.”

“Please do not hesitate to tell me. Feel free to speak your mind with me, as we are cousins,” Jeanette intoned.

Her cousin paused and then said, “Your husband shows signs of a trouble-maker.”

Jeanette asked, “What do you mean or know that I don’t know?”

Her cousin replied, “I see a lot of deceit and pretence in his eyes and talk.”

Stunned, Jeanette said to her, “Okay, let’s wait and see.”

After graduation, Michael worked at a large, private law firm while doing internship before starting his own firm. As his income grew, people began to see another side to Michael. He abandoned the good friends with whom he had enjoyed music over the years, and was rarely seen at home.

He eventually bought a car and with that, stopped sleeping at home except on rare occasions. The family used to go shopping together regularly, and that also stopped. Michael preferred to shop once at the end of the month, take the items to his wife’s doorstep and run off again.

Jeanette gathered courage and told him to stop shopping for the family, because he shopped with his mistress in tow, and she had a say in what Jeanette’s shopping needs were, not to mention accompanying him to deliver the purchases.

Her youngest daughter, who was very fond of her father and did not understand the goings-on, repeatedly told Jeanette that she was the cause of their father’s absence. She even asked her mother to go out, look for him and bring him home.

Through her job at the financial institution, Jeanette took loans, furnished the house adequately and bought a car. She also took on a mortgage and bought a house big enough to accommodate her and her six children comfortably. Meanwhile, the children were growing and going to school.

Michael moved on with his chaotic life that involved a slew of women. He partied with them, travelled with them, drank with them and lived with them openly. Some were divorced with or without children, while others were spinsters.

One dreadful Saturday night, he had the audacity to go to Jeanette’s house, at midnight, drunk with one of his mistresses. Everyone was asleep. He opened the door with his key and proceeded upstairs with his mistress in tow.

He entered the master bedroom and ordered Jeanette to go downstairs and sleep on the sofa in the living room, so as to make room for him and his mistress on the matrimonial bed. Jeanette objected and he began to beat her and eventually pushed her down the stairs. Their children woke up and witnessed it all.

Jeanette ran outside in her bed-time clothes, barefoot, and he followed kicking, pushing and slapping her, still with his mistress following closely. Jeanette ran into the street crying and screaming for her life, trying to make her way to her cousin’s house about five-minutes-walk away. He chased her and continued to rain blows on her as she began to swell and bleed. Neighbours had now woken up and perched themselves on their windows watching the drama unfold.

They reached her cousin’s house with Jeanette wailing and knocking desperately. Her cousin and husband opened their gate quickly and took Jeanette in. Michael tried to follow her inside after throwing the gate wide open violently, all the while verbally abusing her, but was restrained by her cousin and husband.

His mistress had been taking in the scene with a wry smile on her face all the way. About half an hour later, after hurling more insults at Jeanette, and trying to gain physical access to her inside the house, he decided to leave.

“You can have them both,” he said insultingly to Jeanette’s cousin’s husband, referring to the two women.

Her cousin’s husband remained non-confrontational throughout the ordeal, to avoid escalating the situation.

Before leaving, Michael yelled out to his wife, “Come very early tomorrow, take your clothes and go away for good. I do not want you in my life anymore. I can take care of my children alone.”

Jeanette was in a lot of pain. She had bruises and welts all over. She could not walk straight and was crying uncontrollably. From time to time she asked herself, “What did I do to deserve all this? What changed and why? How am I going to walk around tomorrow with the neighbours whispering about me?”

At one point, her cousin said to her, “Jeanette, do you now recall what I told you many years back about this man? Over the years since graduating from law school, he has given you hell, and you have come to me crying and complaining from time to time. I am telling you the worst is still to come. I do not see an end to all this.”

Her cousin gave her a warm sponge bath, applied ointment on her wounds, gave her painkillers and a cup of warm milky cocoa, and put her to bed at about two in the morning. She whimpered for some time before falling asleep until six in the morning. She woke up feeling very sore and was given more painkillers.

Later on Sunday morning, Jeanette’s three youngest children came to her cousin’s house to have breakfast and see their mother. She could not go home to pick up her clothes until she was sure Michael had left. At about eleven in the morning, when she got word that he had left her, cousin went with her to get her clothing.

They then went to Jeanette’s father’s house on the other side of the city, where Jeanette was to stay for some time. She was afraid that Michael would go back to her cousin’s place to assault her again. She left the children alone with the housekeeper as their father had demanded, and sought medical attention.

Jeanette was too unwell to go to work on Monday morning, so she called her manager to report that she was sick. Michael also called her office to talk to her and when he found out she was away because of ill health, he told her boss she was lying and that she was instead enjoying the company of another man.

When Jeanette was well enough to go back to work after a week, her boss saw the bruises, bumps and marks on her face, neck, arms and legs and the doctor’s report. He was speechless and too embarrassed as a man to comment, not to mention his knowing Jeanette to be a very soft-spoken and gentle person, who did not deserve such treatment.

She stayed at her father’s house for three months then decided to go back to living with her children. However, depression threatened to take over her life.

She would, therefore, rush to her cousin’s house at odd times when she needed someone to talk to earnestly. This relieved her mind and calmed her nerves, preventing her from going berserk. Her cousin always gave her the attentive ear she needed. However, due to desperation, she sometimes, got involved with dubious prayer groups. When she eventually thought she was on her way to better health, more drama started.

Michael sent their firstborn son to college overseas with the promise of paying his educational and living expenses. He never fulfilled his promise, therefore not only did their son have to drop out of school, but he also had no means to purchase a plane ticket to fly home with. In addition, their son was too upset to let his mother know what he was going through, whereas his letters to his father remained unanswered.

Jeanette got wind of his predicament from his fellow students, who had gone back home on vacation. She brought him back home a year later after much financial struggle. Michael did not want to hear about or discuss the matter with anybody.

Moreover, Michael in his escapades had not been paying his credit card debts. In addition, he had been stealing his clients’ money, which amounted to hundreds of thousands of dollars that had been entrusted to him for safekeeping until their cases were settled.

One evening, Jeanette went home from work and found that auctioneers had gone to her house in the early afternoon, and carried all the furniture she had bought. The auctioneers had already laid claim to his office furniture and car, as well as the family’s rental house elsewhere.

Because Jeanette was in the dark about Michael’s financial troubles, she called the auctioneers the next morning and found out that he had not paid debts of over $500,000. She then told them that the furniture was purchased by her and they asked her to bring the receipts and loan agreements the same day to prove that. She went with the proof and they returned her furniture the same day with an apology.

Michael was eventually arrested because of the outstanding debts, and eventually imprisoned for three years. While in prison, none of his mistresses visited him. Jeanette alone and their children went to see him.

At the end of his sentence, she took him home to their children. After recuperating from prison life for a few months, he began to seek employment again. However, nobody would hire him, because he was no longer allowed to practice law, based on his tarnished record.

He later got sick and was found to be HIV-positive, a status he acquired before or while in prison. Because anti-retroviral drugs were not commonly available, he died soon after. Jeanette did the honourable thing and gave him a decent burial. She never ever brought charges against him for assault.