Unsettled in Matrimony

Joash and Rhoda were a married couple and great at sports. Joash was an athlete while Rhoda played netball, a game similar to basketball. They loved sports so much that they became part-time coaches to young and upcoming men and women, though they pursued careers unrelated to sports.

They could have made a living at sports, but they were involved purely for the love of it.

As they aged, they became officials in the organizations that governed their respective sports.

They were well known locally and regionally because they traversed provinces and regions as participants in various competitions, initially as players and later as officials. They therefore bore the name of their country in high esteem.

The two actually met through sports, came from the same province, spoke the same vernacular and also attended the same church. They were a very happy couple and the envy of many who paid attention to their sports-related success.

They both worked in the city where they bought a house in a middle-income area. They also owned a farm in one of the most productive rural areas in their country, which they visited when on vacation. They stayed at their farmhouse when they went, and had a caretaker live on-site with his family. Sugarcane and corn were grown commercially at the farm, and poultry and cattle were reared.

Despite their happiness and enchanted life, they had one setback. They could not have children. They were married for over twenty years without having had any, though they wanted some. Meanwhile, Joash had male friends that were taunting him to try “elsewhere”.

Joash, being weak in this regard, acquiesced to peer pressure, and tried “elsewhere” without Rhoda’s knowledge or consent. His mistress conceived and gave birth to his first child, and later to a second child, that made her like an unofficial, secret, second wife. She was a lady from another province, who spoke a different vernacular and belonged to a different religion. Rhoda found out about everything just before the birth of the second child, and was not partial to her husband’s mistress or their children.

She made it clear to the mistress that she and her children were not welcome in her domain and life. However, she and Joash continued their life together as husband and wife, undeterred.

Nevertheless, one day a sudden and drastic change occurred. After work, Joash attended a brief sports meeting, then went out for a quick drink with a friend, after which he intended to go home. While out drinking, Joash collapsed and later died on the way to hospital. Rhoda was called on phone immediately, and she rushed to the hospital to find his body still warm, but lifeless.

His body was taken to the morgue immediately, and Rhoda returned home alone, distressed and pondering the future. She then formulated secret plans alone, keen especially to exclude Joash’s mistress.

The death occurred on an early Monday night, and by the following morning, the news had travelled far via telephone. In fact, some, including his brothers and sisters from the countryside, began travelling to the city on Tuesday, to participate in the burial arrangements, alongside other relatives and friends in the city.

On Tuesday evening, there was a meeting at Rhoda’s house to discuss burial arrangements. Those travelling from Joash’s ancestral home arrived in time to participate. Rhoda never told anyone of her secret plans, however, and Joash’s mistress did not dare attend the meeting.

The group met again on Wednesday evening at Rhoda’s house, to finalize plans for removing the body from the morgue, for the funeral service in church on Thursday. The body would then be taken to the couple’s house and remain there overnight, ready to be transported to their farm on Friday, and buried over the weekend. Rhoda still told nobody of her secret plans. The meeting ended and they all dispersed, ready to do as they had planned on Thursday.

Though Joash’s mistress did not attend the meetings, she knew of the plans made and intended to go to the church service, and travel with her and Joash’s children to the farm for his burial.

After the final meeting on Wednesday, Rhoda brought her secret plans to fruition. Previously, she had organized for Joash’s body to be cremated on Wednesday night, which it was, and the ashes were put in an urn for her to collect! As his wife, she was also already on record as the sole beneficiary to his assets.

On Thursday morning, several close relatives and friends went to the morgue to collect the body and take it to church, where crowds were waiting for the funeral service to begin. There was of course no body at the morgue and upon inquiry, the attendant described what had happened. They realized that Rhoda had fooled them entirely!

They proceeded to the church and broke the news. The crowd could not believe what they heard regarding Rhoda’s scheme, and she was nowhere to be found. Nevertheless, the service went on as scheduled, after some delay.

Furthermore, those going to the burial the following day decided to symbolically bury something at the farm. They therefore travelled to the farm, and buried a banana stem in the coffin they had already purchased.

Rhoda thus denied Joash’s mistress the chance to identify herself as part of the family. His mistress wept saying Joash had conveyed to her his desire to be buried at the farm, but there was nothing she could do about it anymore.

Rhoda went back to her house in the city after briefly going into hiding at her close friends’ place. The urn with Joash’ ashes rested thereafter in her house.