JIMMY DEE CAME BACK to the house every night for a week after they took Miss Fitch to the hospital. He couldn’t remember to stay away. Every night he came, forgetful and full of anticipation to hear her music, and every night he was surprised to find the windows black, the house shut up and empty.
Jimmy Dee had seen the ambulance come for Miss Fitch. He had heard the sirens and watched the police cars slide, pale and fishlike, up to the curb. From a hiding place across the road, he had watched the flashing lights, and he had seen them bring Miss Fitch out of the house on a little wheeled bed. She was tucked in as neatly as a baby. A bottle hung down over her head.
Right after that, Jimmy Dee had run away, going through back yards to the downtown streets. He knew as well as anybody where they had taken Miss Fitch. But, during the days, he simply forgot. As he wandered the town’s frigid alleys or huddled in the nooks between buildings, the knowledge would pass out of his head. Then back he would come the next night all ready to watch and listen. It was winter, but he was used to being out in the cold.
Jimmy Dee first discovered the music on a rambling journey through town one night. He wasn’t looking for anything in particular, unless it was a more comfortable corner to spend the night in. He heard the music, stopped and listened for a while and went away. But he was back again a few nights later, and again the night after that.
Eventually, his route took a pattern. His approach to the house never varied. Unsteadily he made his way along an overgrown hedge on the south side of Miss Fitch’s yard. When he came to the open space of the frozen garden out back, he scuttled across, as best a big, bony man with too much drink in him could scuttle. He always went to the same clump of bushes. They were laurels, long and thin as he was. There was a fork in one branch that he had gotten used to leaning on. He could stay there without moving for a long time. It was one of the world’s safe places. Even by day, it was unlikely that anyone, any neighbor for instance, would pick him out from that clump.
In the weeks before Miss Fitch had gone away, he had come sometimes in the late afternoons, too impatient to wait for cover of dark. No one had ever seen him. He came to listen to the music and to watch the wonderful woman who made it. He could see her clearly through the windows, bright and quick as a butterfly when she moved. She wore strange swooping dresses that fanned out like wings from her arms as she turned. She wasn’t young, but she walked, he noticed, the way a movie star might, passing and repassing the windows with her arms floated out and her head thrown back. Her hair was tied up in a miraculous puff on top. It fell down at the back and blew out over her forehead. One of the movements she made most often was an elaborate sweep with her hand that pushed the loose strands up and away from her eyes. She was, by far, the most exotic thing Jimmy Dee had ever seen.
But it was her music that had made him stay, leaning on the branch for hours in the cold. Now that she was gone, it was the music he missed most of all. She was a violin teacher. During the day, students came and went from the front of her house. Inside her living room they stood with instruments clamped against their chins while Miss Fitch drifted about them waving her hands. (He didn’t call her Miss Fitch, didn’t know that name. She was just lady, or woman, or beautiful.) Sometimes she played her own violin with her students. That was nice. The faint harmonies made Jimmy Dee’s spine tingle, and if he had a bottle in his pocket then, he would take it out for a little drink to celebrate.
Most beautiful of all, though, was when Miss Fitch played by herself, later, after the students had gone home and she had made a quick supper in the kitchen. He had gotten to know her ways during those winter weeks of watching. She played to herself nearly every night after dinner. Jimmy Dee depended on it. He came if he could walk, if he wasn’t so drunk that he forgot all about it.
Occasionally, she didn’t play. She had visitors instead. A man came to dinner and stayed late. Weeks later, there was another, and later, another. Jimmy Dee learned that there was no music to be had on such nights. When a visitor came, he went quietly away knowing not to hope.
But sometimes, sometimes Miss Fitch sat alone in her living room and didn’t play. For no reason that he could see, she read a book instead, or lay, motionless, on her dark couch. Then Jimmy Dee, standing out in the bushes, slowly froze with misery and frustration. He wanted to run to her back door and pound on it. “Come on, lady. I’m here! Play!” he would have yelled. He wanted to go inside and shake her into action.
He came mostly at night. The traffic noises from the town died down in the evening, so he could hear better. Then, the sound of Miss Fitch’s violin came out through the windows and flew into Jimmy Dee like a warm beam of light. It fixed him to the fork in the branch. When Miss Fitch played alone, at night, Jimmy Dee stopped snuffling and he forgot to drink out of his bottle. Happiness swelled in him. It pushed back the cold, the dark, the rushing town all around and made a place for him, a little room that was his own. No one could say to Jimmy Dee while Miss Fitch played: “Get along there now!” No one could tell him to move on or get out. The music was his, all his. It was like something he’d found on the street, something special that had been dropped, left behind for him to snatch up and pocket before anyone else could recognize its value. Jimmy Dee hid himself while he listened in the same way that he would have hidden a pack of cigarettes he had found in the gutter, or a glove abandoned on a park bench. Where there was value there was danger that someone would snatch back.
But in the week since Miss Fitch had gone to the hospital, Jimmy Dee felt a new kind of danger. He felt it as soon as he saw, surprised all over again, the dark house. Suddenly he became more secretive about approaching it. Where before he had scuttled, he now slid, bent almost double, with sly, furtive movements. He paused often to look around, kept closer to the bushes, and though he arrived, out of habit, at the same forked branch, there was no safety there anymore.
Jimmy Dee knew, when he saw the house shut up that way, that they were looking for him. He did not want to remember why they were looking for him. He thought only: the music is gone; it is not safe here anymore. If some hand had reached out of the dark and grabbed him at that moment, if some voice had asked, “And where were you, Jimmy Dee, on the night of February 28, the night Miss Fitch sat all by herself in the room and wouldn’t play and wouldn’t play and still wouldn’t play? Now answer! Where were you?” Jimmy Dee would have shrieked:
“No, I didn’t! I ain’t done nothing. She fell is all. I didn’t mean to. I didn’t want to. No! Leave me alone! I didn’t!”
Night after night, Jimmy Dee slunk away from the dark house and, avoiding the street lights, crept back to the downtown streets to hide, and drink and forget all over again.