02-01. General. In the previous chapter I offered several definitions of PTSD as provided by the general medical community and the Department of Veterans Affairs. This chapter will help you understand those definitions by first explaining some of the reasons you react to trauma the way you do, and secondly by explaining a little about brain chemical imbalances and the meaning and dangers of “triggers“.
02-02. General. To help us understand our ongoing experience with this PTSD thing we have to go back to what took place before we went to war. In a research paper written in May 1992 entitled Veterans, Combat and Stress, about Vietnam Veterans, John Russell Smith, then a graduate student at Duke University, says “It is not the traumatic experience of war itself but the meaning that those events have for the individual which creates trauma”.
Those events we experienced in war and believe to be inhuman or insane are only so because of our learned ethics and values. Because we believed in God and country, mom and apple pie. Because we believed that serving our country was expected and that our country was doing the right thing.
We were innocent as a people and a nation and we believed we were invincible. We were proud and honorable. We were the watch-dogs of the free world. We made a good showing in WWI, WWII and a decent one in Korea. We expected to do the same in Vietnam, the Gulf war, and Iraq/Afghanistan.
02-03. Research Findings. In 1992 Dan and Lynda King of the National Center for PTSD, Boston analyzed data collected from the 1980’s “National Vietnam Veterans Readjustment Study” (NVVRS). In their article PTSD Among Vietnam Veterans: Recent Research Findings they wrote:
“As you might expect, the most important contributor to PTSD is the level of exposure to traumatic events in the war zone itself, what we call combat exposure. This is not a surprising finding, but what was particularly interesting was that the effect of combat on PTSD for the veteran was channeled through his perceptions of the experience. That is, any combat event that a veteran might have experienced in Vietnam, such as being in an ambush or a fire fight, tended to influence PTSD indirectly, through his interpretation of what happened. In addition, the level of combat exposure influenced the veteran’s sense that the overall environment of Vietnam was threatening, uncomfortable, or malevolent. We found the veteran’s perception of the ‘malevolent environment’ of Vietnam also to be a contributor to PTSD symptoms. So it appears that combat exposure, as expected, is implicated–the more combat, the more PTSD–but its influence is indirect.
We considered the possible role of prewar risk or vulnerabilities that might, in addition to his Vietnam experience, contribute to the veteran’s PTSD symptoms. A very important element was the age of the veteran when he went to Vietnam. As we all know, younger men were more likely to be of lower rank, and thus prone to directly experience the heavier combat. This indirect link of the veteran’s age through combat may not be particularly revealing, but we also documented a direct link between the veteran’s age at entry to Vietnam and his reported PTSD symptoms. This finding is suggestive of a maturation-based explanation: The younger the veteran was when he served in Vietnam, the less he was capable of “working thru” his experience and the more PTSD symptoms he felt when he returned.
Another risk factor for PTSD was the veteran’s history of exposure to traumatic events prior to entering the military. By trauma history, we mean being in a serious auto accident, being a victim of assault, being in a house fire, and other similar kinds of experiences. Prewar trauma history operated in a very interesting way to produce PTSD symptoms. Those men who were in heavy combat and had a history of prewar exposure to traumatic events reported higher levels of PTSD symptoms while those in heavy combat without a prior trauma history reported fewer symptoms. This difference in reported PTSD symptoms did not occur for veterans who were exposed to low levels of combat. So, there seems to be a kind of “piling on” effect–a prewar trauma history plus exposure to heavy combat can lead to more PTSD symptoms. Characteristics of the veteran’s family of origin also indirectly contributed to PTSD.
We found that the more troubled the veteran’s family was, the younger he was when he entered Vietnam. Also, the veteran’s family of origin characteristics were associated with his having problems with educational and legal authority. In turn, the veteran’s educational and legal problems before entering the military were related to his exposure to prewar traumatic events(the more problems, the more events), his age at entry to Vietnam(the more problems, the younger), and his exposure to combat while in Vietnam (the more problems, the more combat). So, although family of origin characteristics were not directly related to PTSD, they did seem to predict other factors that were, in turn, either directly implicated (for example, age at entry into Vietnam) or indirectly implicated (for example, pre-military educational and legal problems).”
(Reprinted by permission of the Authors, Dan and Lynda King).
A statistic from the NVVRS not mentioned by Dan and Lynda King in their article is that 66% of Vietnam veterans exposed to high war zone stress have had diagnosable PTSD and 33% still do today.
02-04. The Erosion of Meaning. Also from John Russell Smith‘s paper Veterans, Combat and Stress we find “There have always been veterans for whom the grand rationales……have not provided meaning for their experience…..The erosion of meaning, honor and duty in the first industrialized war, WWI, gave rise to widespread malaise mistakenly named shell shock (Leed, 1979). The loss of meaning in that war gave birth to existentialism, the philosophy of meaninglessness. Even more so during Vietnam, the erosion of sanction for the war, the lack of clear purpose, the duplicitous manipulation of political leaders and the divisive debate among the American people evaporated the meaning of the soldier’s sacrifices.”
The entire article may be found on the Internet at “http://www.vbarnet.com/pages/vetfiles.htm” (This page is no longer available)..
Another unique stress for Vietnam veterans was the rapid manner in which they returned from their hostile environment. In previous wars weeks or months passed before the veteran returned home from the battlefield, due to the length of the war and transportation limitations. During this time, they were with other people who had experienced similar things. Vietnam veterans usually served one year in the “zone” and the majority went and returned by themselves (not with a unit).
After some 30 weeks of being programmed to kill (Basic, A.I.T., etc.), being surrounded by killing for 52 weeks, the Vietnam veteran was quite often taken from the “bush” in the morning and, after only 24 - 48 hours, delivered to American soil and his family (and sometimes anti-war demonstrators) with no cool down period in between. The shock was often confusing and sometimes devastating.
Along the same vane as the paper done by Dr. John Russel Smith is a book written by Jim Goodwin, Psy. D., entitled Post-Traumatic Stress Disorders of the Vietnam Veteran: Observations and Recommendations for the Psychological Treatment of the Veteran and His Family. This work is sponsored and published by the Disabled American Veterans organization and is freely reproduced and distributed by the VA. The following is taken from the chapter entitled “The Etiology of Combat-Related Post-Traumatic Stress Disorders”.
“Surprisingly, with American involvement in the Vietnam War, psychological battlefield causalities evolved in a new direction. What was expected from past war experiences – and what was prepared for – did not materialize. Battlefield psychological breakdown was at an all-time low, 12 per one thousand (Bourne, 1970). (Authors note: this was compared to 23 percent evacuations for psychiatric reasons during WW II and 6 percent in the Korean War).”
Dr. Goodwin contributes this misleading statistic to what he refers to as the “DEROS fantasy”. Soldiers “held on” because they knew that they would rotate back to the states in 1 year (except of the Marines who served 13 month tours). This was particularly difficult and “The struggle for most was an uphill battle. Those motivations that kept the combatant fighting – unit esprit de corps, small group solidarity and an ideological belief that this was the good fight (Moskos, 1975) – were not present in Vietnam. Unit espirit was effectively slashed by the DEROS system. Complete strangers, often GIs who were strangers even to specific unit’s specialty, were transferred into units whenever individual rotations were completed.”
“There were other unique aspects of group dynamics in Vietnam….As a seasoned veteran got down to his last two months in Vietnam, he was struck by a strange malady know as the “short timer’s syndrome”. He would be withdrawn from the field……His buddies would be left behind in the field without his skills, and would be left with mixed feelings of joy and guilt…Feelings of guilt about leaving one’s buddies to whatever unknown fate in Vietnam apparently proved so strong that many veterans were often too frightened to attempt to find out what happened to those left behind.”
“Another factor unique to the Vietnam was that the ideological basis for the war was very difficult to grasp. In World War II, the United States was very clearly threatened by a uniformed and easily recognizable foe. In Vietnam, it was quite the opposite. It appeared that the whole country was hostile to American forces. The enemy was rarely uniformed, and American troops were often forced to kill women and children combatants….It was an endless war with rarely seen foes and no ground gains, just a constant flow of troops in and out of the country. The only observable outcome was an interminable production of maimed, crippled bodies and countless corpses….The rage that such conditions generated was widespread among American troops. It manifested itself in violence and mistrust toward Vietnamese (DeFazio, 1978), toward the authorities, and toward the society that sent these men to Vietnam and then would not support them. Rather than a war with a just ideological basis, Vietnam became a private war of survival for every American individual involved.”
Dr. Goodwin goes on to explain that “The vast majority of Vietnam combat veterans I have interviewed are depressed…..Accompanying the depression is a very well developed sense of helplessness about one’s condition. Vietnam-style combat held no final resolution of conflict for anyone. Regardless of how one might respond, the overall outcome seemed to be just an endless production of casualties with no perceived goals attained. Regardless of how well one worked, sweated, bled and even died, the outcome was the same. Our GIs gained no ground: they were constantly rocketed or mortared. They found little support from their “friends and neighbors” back home, the people in whose name so many were drafted into military service. They felt helpless. They returned to the United States, trying to put together some positive resolution of this episode in their lives, but the atmosphere at home was as hopeless. They were still helpless. Why even bother anymore?”
And finally he says, “The veterans’ rage is frightening to them and to others around them….Along with the rage at authority figures from the Vietnam ear, these veterans today often feel a generalized mistrust of anyone in authority and the “system” in the present era. Many combat veterans with stress disorders have a long history of constantly changing their jobs.”
I thank Dr. Jim Goodwin, himself a Marine Corps veteran of Vietnam combat, and the Disabled American Veterans (DAV) for making this information available.
(Authors Note: This is the same thing that is taking place now in Iraq)
02-05.General - While most PTSD survivors usually come to understand what has caused their problems very few know what affects their behavior. The most amazing fact that I uncovered while writing this manual is that after all these years there is still no full understanding of how traumatic memories and emotions interact with biological and psychological triggers. While some research has been done, only a little is known about the ways brain chemicals and daily social interactions affect PTSD survivors. With so little information it has been difficult for the pharmaceutical and psychotherapeutic communities to develop a definitive therapy or course of treatment for PTSD.
(Authors Note: After 11 years of treatment and I still take 3 anti-depressants and two anti anxiety medications.)
02-06. Memories as Pictures. Some of the simplest concepts I have run across while doing research for this manual have had the most impact on my personal growth and recovery. For instance if we were able to “remember” pain, we would certainly go mad before puberty. On the other hand we also do not have the ability to remember pleasure, which would be an asset to most of us. God was good to us when he glued all of the parts together and decided how the brain would work.
Where am I going with this? Have you ever come to the realization that every thought we have creates an image? Try it….it is impossible to not “see” a memory. If we think of an orange.. we “see” an orange. While the brain registers everything we see, hear or feel, our images are not always historically correct. Much depends on our relative position in the memory causing event and whether or not the event was “memorable”. On the whole we only clearly “see”, or remember, those events that stand out as the worst or best in our lives.
These realizations gave me a better understanding of what “flashbacks” and intrusive thoughts are to trauma victims. These memories, or images, are more often than not accompanied by emotions. The combination of these memories and emotions is what affects us negatively as we attempt to function on a daily basis. What are the physiological causes and effects of these intrusive thoughts?
02-07. The brain operates on chemicals. In his Internet article Emotional Memory Management (www.zoomnet.net/~jcarver/emotmem.html) (This web page is no longer available on the internet) Dr. Joseph M. Carver writes, “Chemicals produce emotional responses in the brain and body. Just like a certain combination of flour, sugar, butter, and other foods can combine and produce a German chocolate cake, these chemicals combine in our brain to produce certain moods, reactions, and feelings.
Just like an automobile contains various fluids (brake, window washer, transmission, oil, anti-freeze, etc.), the brain operates on chemicals known as “neurotransmitters“. While the subject is too technical for this paper, it is known that these brain chemicals called “neurotransmitters” produce various emotional conditions. Like the oil in our automobile, neurotransmitters have a normal level in the brain and can be “low” or “high” depending upon certain situations.
Some typical neurotransmitters:
a. Serotonin: Perhaps the most actively researched neurotransmitter at this time, serotonin is known to be related to depression, headaches, sleep problems, and many mental health concerns. When serotonin is low in the brain system - depression and other mental health problems are produced….Antidepressants, such as Prozac and Zoloft, work by increasing serotonin in the brain. As our Serotonin level returns to normal, our depression lifts.
b. Dopamine: Abnormally high levels of this neurotransmitter in the brain produce paranoia, excitement, hallucinations, and disordered thought (schizophrenia).
c. Norepinephrine: Related to anxiety and depression, high levels in the brain produce strong physical-anxiety manifestations such as trembling, restlessness, smothering sensations, dry mouth, palpitations, dizziness, flushes, frequent urination, and problems with concentration. A “panic attack” is actually a sudden surge of norepinephrine in the brain.
d. Endorphins: Substances produced by the body that kill pain or produce a feeling of well-being. In marathon runners, these substances are responsible for the “runner’s high”.
The levels of these chemicals or neurotransmitters in the brain create our mood. A chronic low level of serotonin, as when experiencing long-term severe stress, produces strong depression.
The low serotonin creates symptoms such as:
105 Frequent crying spells
106 Loss of concentration and attention
107 Early morning awakening (about 4:00 am)
108 Loss of physical energy
109 Increase in thinking/mind speed, pulling bad memories
110 “Garbage” thoughts about death, dying, guilt, etc.
111 Loss of sexual interest
Emotional Memory files contain instructions for the brain to use these neurotransmitter ingredients to produce the mood in the file. We note that all antianxiety, antidepressant, and antipsychotic medications focus on changing the levels of these chemicals in the brain.”
And finally Dr. Carver writes “Thoughts change brain chemistry. That sounds so simple but that’s the way it is, with our thoughts changing neurotransmitters on a daily basis. If a man walks into a room with a gun, we think “threat”, and the brain releases norepinephrine. We become tense, alert, develop sweaty palms, and our heart beats faster. If he then bites the barrel of the gun, telling us the gun is actually chocolate, the brain rapids changes its’ opinion and we relax and laugh - the jokes on us.
We feel what we think! Positive thinking works. As the above example suggests, what we think about a situation actually creates our mood.”
02-08. Discoveries - “UT Researchers Discover How Brain Chemical Affects PTSD”. In the December 11th 1997 issue of the Austin American-Statesman newspaper reporter Dick Stanley writes “There’s new hope for people with post-traumatic stress disorders from child abuse, rape, warfare and other traumas. Researchers at the University of Texas Medical Branch at Galveston report in today’s issue of the journal Nature that the disorders might be caused by excessive amounts of key chemical in the amygdala, a part of the brain that plays a critical role in mediating fear and other emotional responses in people and animals.”
The article goes on to say that “Previous research along these lines have found numerous hints that the neurotransmitter glutamate might be responsible for the learned-fear response, both for legitimate fears we need to survive and the fears associated with previous traumas.” (Authors Note: An article on the internet, printed in 2004 indicates that this is still in experimentation.)
An article on the same research was found on the Internet entitled PTSD Treatment: An Outline and Review, (users.aol.com/fedprac/11lubin.htm) (This web page is no long available on the internet) written by Hadar Lubin, MD. In short he says “Uncontrollable stress produces profound alterations in numerous neurotransmitter systems” and that “the amygdala has been implicated in the formation of re-experiencing symptoms such as flashbacks.”
Another chemical imbalance, not brain related, can be caused by the Adrenal Glands. Dr. Aphrodite Matsakis, PhD, in her book I Can’t Get Over It says (New Harbinger Publications, 1996) “…if you were in an emergency state for too long, your adrenals might be damaged due to the overuse, and thus do not respond properly. The adrenal glands were not made to handle prolonged stress.” I have not seen any other research on this topic so I do not know how plausible it is, but I know my adrenal gland was working like hell in Vietnam.
And finally I found an interesting article in the May 31, 1999 issue of U. S. News and World Report entitled “A snapshot of depression” by Joannie M. Schrof, which says“…A study conducted at the University of Texas Health Science Center in San Antonio used brain imaging techniques (authors note: I believe they are referring to a cat scan type of picture) to reveal a lack of communications between regions of the brain where cognitive tasks like planning and paying attention are performed (the neocortex) (authors note: this is what is referred to as the “new” part of the brain) and regions where emotions are processed (the limbic system) (authors note: the limbic is what is considered the “old” part of the brain, the edge, border, or fringe part). When one region revs up and requires more blood, the other region shuts down, using less. In normal brains, that feedback loop is flexible. In depressed individuals, the loop runs wild, so the cortex becomes stuck in a dysfunctional state and the limbic system in a hyperactive one”. The study was conducted by Helen Mayberg, currently serving as chair of neuropsychiatry at the University of Toronto.
02-09. Effects of Every Day Living. As we watch TV, drive to work, walk in the mall or just celebrate a holiday we often experience strong feelings, sometimes even “flashbacks”, without being aware of what is happening to us. Psychiatrists call these events “triggers“. These triggers are not always negative and not always caused by traumatic events. When we see a tiger on a billboard we might get a mental image of an Exxon Gas station or Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes, depending on our point of reference. These are commercially created “triggers”.
On the other hand we might hear a noise, smell an odor, experience an anniversary date or see a particular picture related to a long past traumatic event and be overcome with negative emotions or act out or shut down or leave or try to commit suicide. If we have buried the event or events deep enough we will not even know why we are experiencing those feelings.
Most veterans live with these triggers on a daily basis with no particular mental consequence. For survivors of PTSD, triggers overwhelm their natural mental defenses which shield them from their traumatic past experiences. Understanding this is often the first step to recovery. If you have experienced being triggered and not yet sought medical assistance, do so now. This is not something you can handle on your own. If you have not yet reached the stage where you feel you need medical help you might try one or more of the following when these triggers occur:
a. Remove yourself from the trigger.
b. Pound on a pillow.
c. Talk to yourself (“I am safe. I am not in Vietnam”) or yell out loud.
d. Perform a vigorous physical activity (this is VERY good).
e. Listen to soothing music.
02-10. Memory and Concentration. There is a fine line between “memory problems” and having “difficulty concentrating”. Normally we hear from the medical community that depression causes “memory problems”. “Difficulty concentrating” is usually listed separately. Having suffered from depression (I still have bouts as I write this manual) I believe depression causes “difficulty concentrating” which in turn causes what we perceive as “loss of memory”. Most, if not all of my “forgetfulness” stems from not being able to concentrate on what I am doing and perhaps a week later I find that I have “forgotten” something that I should have done. The “memory problems” are the result of this lack of concentration the previous week.
While in treatment at my local Veterans Clinic I have witnessed several veterans with PTSD actually becoming depressed because they think they are losing their minds (memory problems). This often causes them to become even more depressed (very close to suicide).
02-11. Another effect of Trauma is Anger. A common thread amongst the veterans I have spoken with seems to be anger. Nothing in my personal research indicates a medical reason for anger. I remember hearing as a teenager that “anger was a wasted emotion”. The American Heritage Dictionary defines anger as, “A feeling of extreme hostility, indignation, or expiration; rage; rath”. In a combat situation anger can save your live. So why are you angry now?
I offer a few personal thoughts based on my having served in Vietnam. See if your feelings are not similar:
I am angry because our harsh experiences in Vietnam and the deaths of over 58,000 of our friends and fellow soldiers were a wasteful part of a political game. Three different presidents, Kennedy, Johnson and then Nixon refused to pull out of Vietnam because they each wanted to avoid the legacy of being the first U.S. president to lose a war. Probably before, and definitely after, the Tet debacle of 1968 many government officials and advisors came to the realization that we would NEVER win the war and yet 40,000 (the majority of those killed) American soldiers died in Vietnam after Tet of 1968 and before the United States finally withdrew.
I am angry at not having been able to do more for my buddies in Vietnam. Not having saved the life of a certain buddy in Vietnam. Having killed in Vietnam. Angry because I am alive, and many of my friends are dead.
Having said that, consider the following, which I found on the Kaiser Permanente “Your Health” Internet website:
“Chill out and live longer - Angry men tend to be buried sooner. Researchers believe that anger causes the release of stress hormones into the blood-stream. That may be why, in a study by the Harvard School of Public Health, men with the highest anger scores on a personality test were much more likely to develop heart disease. About three times as likely, in fact.
The study, of 1,300 men age 40-90, also found that angrier men tended to drink and smoke more.” (www.kpnw.org/~pfh/fpfh97-hbits.html) (This web page is no longer on the internet)
I am aware of the fact that just thinking about not being angry will not make the anger go away. The VA usually has stress reduction classes and anger control programs. Join one. I did, and it helped.
The life committed to nothing larger than itself is a meager life indeed. Human beings require context of meaning and hope. We used to have ample context, and when we encountered failure, we could pause and take our rest in that setting – our spiritual furniture – and revive our sense of who we were. I call the larger setting the commons. It consists of the belief in the nation, in God, and one’s family, or in a purpose that transcends our lives.
In the past quarter-century, events occurred that so weakened our commitment to larger entities as to leave us almost naked before the ordinary assaults of life. As has often been observed, the assassinations, the Vietnam War, and Watergate combined to destroy for many the idea that our nation was the means through which we could accomplish lofty goals. Those of you who grew up in the early 1960s probably sensed this, as I did, on November 22, 1963 (John Kennedy shot), as we watched our vision of the future wiped out. We lost hope that our society could cure human ills. It’s a commonplace, perhaps, but an accurate observation, that many in my generation shifted their commitment, out of fear and out of despair, from careers in public service to careers in which we could at least make ourselves happy.
This shift from the public good to private goods was reinforced by the assassinations of Martin Luther King, Jr., Malcomb X, and Robert Kennedy. The Vietnam War taught those a bit younger the same lesson. The futility and cruelty of a decade of war eroded youth’s commitment to patriotism and America. And for those who missed the lesson of Vietnam, Watergate was hard to ignore.
So commitment to the nation lost its ability to provide us with hope. The erosion of commitment, in turn, caused people to look inward for satisfaction, to focus upon their own lives. While political events were nullifying the old idea of the nation, social trends were nullifying God and the family, as scholars have noted. Religion or the family might have replaced the nation as a source of hope and purpose, keeping us from turning inward. But, by unfortunate coincidence, the erosion of belief in the nation coincided with breakdown of the family and a decline of belief in God.
A high divorce rate, increased mobility, and twenty years of low birthrate are the culprits in the erosion of family. Because of frequent divorce, the family is no longer the abiding institution it once was, a sanctuary that would always be there unchanged when we needed balm on our wounds. Easy mobility – the ability to pick up and move great distances – tends to shatter family cohesion. Finally, having no siblings or just one – which is the case in so many American families – isolates a person. The extra attention that results when parents are centered on just on or two children, although satisfying to the kids in the short run (it actually ups their mean IQ about half a point), in the long run gives them the illusion that their pleasures and pains are rather more momentous than they are.
So put together the lack of belief that your relationship to God Matters, the breakdown of your belief in the benevolent power of your country, and the breakdown of the family. Where can one now turn for identity, for purpose, and for hope? When we need spiritual furniture, we look around and see that all the comfortable leather sofas and stuffed chairs have been removed and all that’s left to sit on is a small, frail folding chair: the self. And the maximal self, stripped of the buffering of any commitment to what is larger in life, is a setup for depression.
Either growing individualism alone or a declining commons alone would increase vulnerability to depression. That the two have coincided in America’s recent history is, in my analysis, why we now have an epidemic of depression. The mechanism through which it works is leaned helplessness……….when individuals face failures they cannot control, they become helpless.
“Learned Optimism, How to change your mind and your life”, by Martin E.P. Seligman, Ph.D., Pocket Books, New York, 1990.
02-12. Personal Experiences. I have PTSD. Thirty years worth of “triggers” finally brought me to my knees. Many things that affect us - growing older, the loss of parents and friends - seem at first to be normal events, unfortunate, but not unexpected. However, upon reflection all of these events turned out to be triggers in one form or another, and they will happen to all of us.
Most people pass through these events after a certain amount of anxiety and grief, however veterans not only suffer the emotional stress of theses events but also relive the stress and emotional scars from past trauma.
Many veterans wonder why it took so long for them to manifest PTSD. One opinion, which I share, is espoused by Dr. C.B. Scrignar in his book on PTSD states, “In the experience of the author, Delayed Onset is actually a term used to describe delayed diagnosis of PTSD. The delay, therefore, is not in the onset but in the recognition and treatment of a preexisting PTSD……..Vietnam-era veterans have frequently received the diagnosis of Delayed Onset of PTSD; however, the real delay was in the acceptance by the U. S. government of the traumatic effects of war upon combat soldiers. Undeniably, if veterans, especially wounded combat soldiers, had been examined prior to discharge, a significant number would have been diagnosed with PTSD.”
When I had my first bout with depression I though I was going crazy or getting Alzheimer’s. I just happened to be working at a VA Hospital and had a very supportive supervisor and fellow workers. I would do things one day and have no idea the next what I had done or where I had put things. This got very spooky. I remember when I went over to the Mental Health ward to get help the first thing they asked me was what day this was and who the president was.
SITREP - WW II Era (1941):
The Lincoln Continental is introduced by the Ford Motor Company; the “Sad Sack” is originated by George Baker; the book Darkness at Noon is written by Arthur Koestler; the movies “Citizen Cane” and “The Maltese Falcon” are released; the songs “White Cliffs of Dover” and “Deep in the Heart of Texas” are released; the New York Yankees win the World Series by defeating the Brooklyn Dodgers 4 games to 1.
WW II Era (1942):
Napalm developed by Harvard chemist Louis F. Feiser; The Women’s Auxiliary Army Corps (WAAC) established by act of Congress May 14; The Waves (Women Accepted for Voluntary Emergency Service) authorized by act of congress July 30; The books The Moon Is Down by John Steinbeck and Breakfast With the Nikolides by Rumer Godden are published; The movies “Casablanca” with Humphrey Bogart, “Gentleman Jim” with Errol Flyn and “The Male Animal” with Henry Fonda are released; the songs “Don’t Get Around Much Anymore” and “A String of Pearls” are released; the St. Louis Cardinals win the World Series by defeating the New York Yankees 4 games to 1.
Deep within the recesses of my mortal soul lies a room where secrets they be kept,
there are visions and pieces of time, in this place where the devil himself has slept.
When moments of despair over me do wash and horrific images crowd my mind,
I know the door to this room has fractured and unpleasant thoughts I do find.
This room is a dark and loathsome place, kept best under lock and key,
it’s intended for the storage of unwanted specters, never to be let free.
There are times when I slip in to mentally fondle some thought, long ago stored in shame,
the Deceiver whispering in the recesses, at my doorstep laying the blame.
Skeletons line the walls where paint has chipped, then fallen, and dark nasties do reside,
old crates brim with horrid stories, dusty shelves are full and demons do confide.
Through our life love we might receive, happiness at times even offers a sweet tomorrow,
knowing we must go on, smiling in pain, laughing at death, there will always be, The Room of Sorrow.
By I. S. Parrish