Delilah sat at her vanity at The Pony with a blush brush in her hand just staring at her reflection. She had to be the biggest coward on the planet. How could she have been so scared to let Caleb walk away?
It had terrified her to leave Mississippi, but she did it because it had been the only way she was going to survive her teenage years. It had unsettled her to come to Los Angeles because back then she’d had vague thoughts about being the next Hollywood star. Yet that abstract dream had faded quickly under reality and the need for money. For seven years she’d created this world that had revolved around one single direction…to get her GED, because if she got that then everything would be great. It would be peachy.
It would be normal.
She took a deep breath and laid down the brush. She looked over herself with a critical eye. She wore a blue wig that managed to barely cover the tips of her naked breasts. Around her hips were the barely there G-string panties that hid just enough to keep the law off the management’s back. Glitter dusted her skin so she could glow under the spotlights. In a few minutes she was due onstage to shimmy and shake for her paycheck, and it suddenly dawned on her that when she got her GED nothing was really going to change.
She’d still need to make money, so she’d still be dancing, shaking her ta-tas in the faces of men reeking of stale beer and cigarettes. Did she think that once she proved she was worth a high school diploma that the world would stop spinning, the trumpets would blare, and thousands of balloons would pour from the heavens in triumph?
Somehow, she didn’t see that happening.
So what did she see happening?
She saw herself in the exact same place in front of the exact same mirror, holding the same brush and wearing the same wig. She’d still have this, and she’d still be all alone.
When she’d met Caleb, she had never thought about being lonely. She’d existed in this bubble of work and study with her eye on the goal. She’d taught herself from the ground up and she was proud of how far she’d gotten. But what was the next step? What was the next dream?
Event planning always interested her but the thought of online courses, apprenticing and starting up a business overwhelmed her, not to mention the hobnobbing, schmoozing and kissing ass all for the opportunity of a contact. Public relations weren’t her strong suit.
So where did that leave her?
It left her in Los Angeles while Caleb flew back to Alaska. He’d been right. You could fall in love in a week, but she’d let all her insecurities drag her back down to what was safe. If she stayed here in L.A., then she stayed with her comfort zone. And she’d be miserable because she was too scared to take a chance.
She glanced up at the clock on the wall. It was almost nine, almost time for Caleb’s plane to take off. Her heart stopped. If she let him get on that plane, then everything around her would be meaningless without him. She pulled out her phone and then cursed when she realized the battery had died.
She tossed it back into her bag and stood, pulling the damn blue wig off her head. She ran to her locker and opened it, taking out her clothes. Modesty had no place in an exotic dancer’s world so she shucked the uncomfortable scrap laughingly called panties and began dressing in her real clothes.
“What ‘cha doing, Del?” Suzy, one of the other girls, asked from her vanity.
Delilah glanced at her and met the girl’s gaze in the mirror. “I’m out of here.”
“Now? You go on in, like, three minutes!”
“I guess you’ll have to take front pole, Suzy.”
The other dancer’s eyes widened. “Seriously? Like, totally seriously?”
Delilah smiled. “Yeah. I’m done dancing.”
Then suddenly, the music abruptly stopped playing. Delilah half focused on it until she heard Caleb’s voice reverberate through the dance hall.
“‘To know for an hour, you were mine completely. Mine in body and soul, my own. I would bear unending tortures sweetly, with not a murmur and not a moan. A lighter sin or a lesser error might change through hope or fear divine. But there is no fear, and hell has no terror to change or alter a love like mine.’”
“What the hell is that?” Suzy asked.
“It’s Ella Wheeler Wilcox,” Delilah whispered.
She ran. Leaving the dressing room, she hurried from the backstage area to the front. She looked toward the DJ booth, squinting against the harsh light blinding her. Ignoring all the confused patrons, she hurried from the platform, racing to Caleb. He met her halfway, scooping her up into his arms, hugging her tight. There, surrounded by everything she hated, all the men who stuffed money into her g-string, she wound her arms around Caleb so tightly she didn’t want to let go.
“I’m so sorry, Caleb!” she said anxiously. “You were right. People do fall in love in a week because I’ve been sitting here thinking and I realized that I’ve been so scared about leaving the haven I’ve built that I pushed you away and I don’t want you to go, Caleb. I love you.”
“Wow, talk about a run on sentence,” he murmured, pulling back to cup her face. “It was a beautiful run on sentence.”
“You didn’t get on the plane.”
“And you’re not dancing.”
She shook her head. “I had already quit. Like, five seconds ago. I realized that just because I’m taking a frickin’ GED test won’t change things. But loving you will.”
“I’ll have to retest here in California but transferring to a park here shouldn’t be too--”
“What?” she asked. “What do you mean transferring?”
“I can’t live without you, Delilah,” he explained. “You’re my world now.”
She gripped his hands. “And I don’t want you to give up yours. Especially since I don’t really have a life in L.A.”
“Delilah--”
“Shh,” she said, covering his mouth with her finger. “I want to go with you. At least until we figure out what our next move is. And we will figure it out together, right Caleb?”
He took her hand in his. “Always, my love. But, before we go home to Alaska, you’ll be taking that GED test.”
“It’s no longer necessary,” she said.
“Of course, it is,” he said. “You’ve worked too damn hard, and I would never take away your dreams, your aspirations.”
“That’s just it,” she told him. “I don’t know what my next dreams are.”
He smiled at her. “Then we’ll figure them out. Together.”
She kissed him again, and the audience around them began clapping. Embarrassed, she pulled back to look around.
“Oh, god.”
“Come on,” Caleb said, smiling. “Let’s get out of here.”
Suzy rushed over to hand over her purse, and Delilah hugged her.
“Good luck,” Suzy said. “He’s a handsome fellow.”
Delilah smiled. “He sure is. I’m so very lucky.”
Caleb twined their fingers together, and they left that world behind.