Amanda met Quinn at a tapas place, where they shared a few plates and a bottle of Fairmount Ridge rosé. After, they settled on a Frieda Kahlo documentary at Cinemapolis. She teased Quinn for insisting on a box of Junior Mints, but wound up eating her fair share. Quinn’s hand found hers and they held hands until the credits rolled. They walked out, fingers still entwined. Nothing remarkable really, but hands down the best date she’d been on in over a decade.
“At the risk of sounding cheesy, I’m going to put out there that I’m not ready for this date to be over,” Quinn said.
Cheesy or not, she was one hundred percent on the same page. “Is it cheesy if I agree?”
Quinn shook her head slowly. “I’m going to go with no. Do you want to get a nightcap somewhere?”
Was Quinn being intentionally vague? And if so, was it hesitation or deference? Her instinct was to defer in return. But she liked Quinn and, for the first time in a long time, she was feeling…what? Sassy? Brazen? Whatever it was, it nudged her to take a chance. “I’d love that. The Watershed is nearby. Or we could go back to your place.”
Surprise flashed through Quinn’s eyes, but it seemed like the good kind. She ran her hand up the back of her neck, making Amanda’s fingers itch to do the same. “I do make a mean old-fashioned.”
Amanda angled her head slightly. “That’s convenient because I love an old-fashioned.”
Quinn frowned. “I’m disappointed we have two cars.”
“It’s okay. I’ll follow you.” She certainly didn’t want Quinn feeling obligated to bring her back to her car after. Whether that was after a drink or in the morning. As they walked to their cars, she stole a glance at Quinn and wondered if she was thinking the same thing. She’d find out soon enough.
Quinn texted her address, but Amanda had no trouble following her Subaru up 96 a few miles towards Trumansburg. The apartment complex Quinn pulled into was small, maybe a half dozen two-story buildings.
Quinn led her up a short walk and a flight of stairs. Inside, she flipped on a few lights. “It’s rather generic.” Quinn sounded apologetic. “It’s a temporary arrangement I’ve let become less temporary than I intended.”
“I was lucky after my divorce. Since the kids were going to be with me most of the time, I kept the house.”
“That makes sense. And it is a great house.”
She shrugged. “It is. The problem is it feels strange to think about selling it, even if I’m not sure I want to spend the rest of my life there.”
Quinn shook her head. “Not strange at all, especially once the kids are moved out. It’s the perfect time to consider your options.”
“Is it wrong to say I want only two bedrooms but twice as much kitchen?”
Quinn didn’t hesitate. “Nope.”
“Thank you. Even if you’re just saying that to be nice.”
“Home is about having the space you want and need. I’m not saying you’re going to have an easy time finding it, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have it.”
She smiled. “You have a gift for saying the right thing.”
“Can I quote you on that? My sisters are convinced I have an uncanny gift for putting my foot in my mouth.”
Her smile gave way to a snicker. “Do you?”
Quinn blew out a breath and looked at the ceiling. “I have my moments.”
“Don’t we all?” She certainly said her share of things she wished she could take back.
“We should drink to that, but I’ve invited you in and neglected to fix you a drink.”
She tipped her head. “I’m in no rush.”
“Still, I can’t have you thinking I’m a lousy host.” She gestured to the couch. “Make yourself comfortable.”
“Sure there’s nothing I can do to help?”
“I’m a terrible cook, but I can handle a cocktail. I’ll be right back.” Quinn retreated to the small galley kitchen that more than sufficed for her minimalist culinary endeavors. She pulled down a pair of highball glasses and got to work muddling the sugar and bitters with slices of orange. The methodical process calmed her as much as the promise of liquid courage did. “I forgot to ask if you prefer bourbon or rye.”
“Will you think less of me if I don’t have a preference?”
She poked her head through the doorway. “If you could see the things that pass for dinner around here, you’d know I’m the last person to judge anyone’s tastes.”
Amanda laughed. God, she had a sexy laugh. “I’ll have what you’re having.”
Quinn finished the drinks with a splash of water and a pair of oversize ice cubes. She joined Amanda on the sofa and handed her one. “Cheers.”
“Cheers.”
They sipped. They talked about progress at the bakery and some of Quinn’s other projects. She’d worried they might run out of things to talk about, but they didn’t. At some point, Amanda put her hand on Quinn’s knee. Quinn set down her glass and used the opportunity to get closer. She was totally paying attention to the conversation, but she also couldn’t tear her eyes away from Amanda’s mouth. When Amanda finished her drink and licked her bottom lip, the temptation proved too strong.
Quinn meant to kiss her lightly. But Amanda’s lips were impossibly soft and she tasted of bourbon and orange. It took every ounce of restraint to pull back and search Amanda’s eyes. What she saw in them—arousal and longing and maybe a trace of challenge—sent her pulse racing. The pounding in her chest had nothing on the throb between her legs. “I’m not sure one kiss should test the limits of my self-control.”
“I think you should worry less about your self-control and more about kissing me again.”
Short of taking off her clothes, there wasn’t a single thing sexier Amanda could have done. The encouragement was exactly what she needed, even as it threatened to short-circuit her brain. She took the glass from Amanda’s hand and set it on the coffee table. And kissed her again.
The slow slide of lips became urgent. A tease of tongues became a fervent exploration. Amanda opened for her, welcomed her in. Quinn wanted to steep herself in Amanda, her taste, her textures.
She didn’t recall doing it, but they somehow slid down on the sofa. Amanda’s hands roamed over her, restless and seeking. Quinn braced herself with one arm, allowing her free hand to creep under the hem of Amanda’s shirt.
It was fun. It was playful. It was really fucking hot.
When Amanda’s fingernails scratched lightly down the skin of her back, she realized how close they were to having sex right there on the couch. She eased away and ran a hand through her hair. “It seems silly to be confessing this, but I feel a bit like a teenager right now.”
“It’s not silly. It’s cute.” Amanda sat up and ran a hand through her own disheveled locks. “You know what would make you feel a lot less like a teenager?”
Quinn sat back and tried to slow her skittering pulse. It was a good thing Amanda couldn’t see the hormones and adrenaline coursing through her. If she could, chances were good she’d never take her seriously again. “What’s that?”
“Asking me to stay the night.”
Her heart went from racing to stopped dead in about two seconds flat. A thousand questions flashed through her mind. Was Amanda serious? Was staying over code for having sex? Was her mouth hanging open and, if so, did it make her look like a complete idiot? None of those were the one Amanda had put out there. Even if everything about this had her tied in knots and practically tripping over herself, she knew enough to ask the question Amanda had essentially requested. “Do you need to go?”
Amanda shook her head.
“I’d love it if you didn’t.”
“I would, too.”
Technically, that could have settled the matter, but she owed it to Amanda, to herself, to make the invitation clear. “Will you stay the night?”
Amanda smiled, and for all her boldness only a moment before, blushed. She nodded.
“Would you, um, like another drink?”
She shook her head.
Even as a ball of anticipation lodged in her chest, she knew it was her turn to take the lead. “Would you like to move to the bedroom instead of making out on the couch like a pair of horny teenagers?”
“That sounds like a fantastic idea.”
That, too, should have settled it. But she couldn’t shake the cloud of nerves that felt almost as big as her desire. “I don’t mean to ruin the moment, but…”
When she didn’t finish, Amanda looked into her eyes. “What is it? Talk to me.”
She frowned. “It’s just, well, it’s been a while.”
Amanda’s worried look turned quizzical. “A while since what?”
Oh, God. Maybe she shouldn’t have said anything. Floundering would be better than talking about it. “Since I…you know.”
“Had sex?”
Yep. Definitely would have been better if she hadn’t said anything. “Yes.”
“But haven’t you been dating constantly for the last year?”
Quinn closed her eyes. “Dating. Fix-ups. Not relationships.”
“Oh.” Amanda let the word drag out. Understanding, yes, but Quinn couldn’t tell if there was sympathy or judgment or something else there with it.
“I don’t know. I wasn’t ready, I guess? Or there was no spark? Or maybe both?” Stop rambling. It’s only getting worse.
“But you feel a spark with me?”
Air rushed out of Quinn’s lungs. “Have I not made that obvious?”
Amanda’s eyes danced. “I’d say you have. And do you want to be here, with me, right now?”
“I do.” She couldn’t remember the last time she’d wanted something so badly.
“Okay. See, that wasn’t so hard.”
Ha.
“Do you want to take me to bed?”
“If you’re not completely turned off by how badly I’m fumbling this, yes.”
Amanda’s smile was slow. In it, desire and invitation and reassurance. “Then that’s what I think you should do.”
Was it as simple as that? Obviously, it was. It could be. Should be. She was just so fucking out of practice. “Okay.”
She took Amanda’s hand and stood. The bedroom wasn’t far, so she held on for the short distance. She’d left the lamp in the corner on, just in case. It cast a soft glow over the room. A compromise really, since candles felt presumptuous.
“Quinn?”
The way Amanda said her name sent a tingle up her spine. “Yes?”
“If you’re not ready, or at any point change your mind, it’s okay. I get that it’s a big deal because I’ve been there myself. Recently, as a matter of fact.”
Amanda was giving her an out, one she could take and maybe not blow any chance they might have at a next time. The funny thing was, she didn’t want an out. Or rather, the funny thing was Amanda’s offering it confirmed an out wasn’t what she wanted. “I won’t change my mind.”
“Still, I want you to know you can and I—”
Rather than letting Amanda finish, Quinn pulled her into a kiss. It started gentle but took on all the heat and urgency that had been pumping through her veins a moment before. The desire that had been clanging around inside her for weeks. “I want you. I haven’t stopped thinking about you since we met.”
“You don’t have to say—”
Once again, Quinn silenced her with a kiss. “Let me show you.”
Amanda’s mouth under hers tethered her to the moment and quieted the voices, the questions, in her mind. Not questions about whether she wanted this, but the ones that needled her about being so out of practice. Amanda’s hand slid up her back, her nails scratched lightly at the back of Quinn’s neck. Again, just the encouragement she needed.
She threaded her fingers into Amanda’s hair and used the gentle grip to angle Amanda’s head. She took the kiss deeper, exploring Amanda’s mouth with her tongue. Amanda let out this tiny moan, like she knew it was exactly the sort of sound that would drive Quinn crazy. It gave her the confidence to slip her hands under the hem of Amanda’s shirt, ease it up and over her head.
The result—Amanda standing in front of her in a lacy bra and with messy hair—was the sexiest thing she’d seen in as long as she could remember. Now being nervous didn’t matter. All that mattered was this moment and making Amanda feel half as good as she made Quinn feel, even before having sex.
She trailed a line of kisses down Amanda’s neck, across her collar bone, and down to the edge of her bra. She traced the lace with her tongue, letting her hands creep up to cup Amanda’s breasts from underneath. She grazed her thumbs over Amanda’s nipples. The way they hardened under her touch made her throat go dry.
“So beautiful.”
She could sense Amanda’s head shake and looked up. Amanda held her gaze for only a second before looking away.
“Surely, you don’t think otherwise.” She wanted to see the rest of Amanda, touch her everywhere. Show her exactly how beautiful she was. She tugged at the bow holding Amanda’s skirt in place and stepped back to watch the fabric slither to the floor. Amanda’s panties, a soft green lace, matched her bra. “Not beautiful. Stunning.”
Amanda crossed her arms over her stomach. “You’re going to make me bashful.”
The moment of vulnerability took her by surprise. She wrapped her fingers around Amanda’s wrists and gently pulled her arms away from her body. “Stunning.”
Before Amanda could protest, Quinn kissed her again. And again after that. Or maybe, technically, she didn’t stop kissing her. Still gripping Amanda’s wrists, she walked slowly toward the bed. Amanda followed her lead wordlessly. She didn’t know exactly what she expected Amanda to be like in bed, but tractable wasn’t it. The surprise was as much a turn-on as the idea of being in charge. “Do you want to tell me what you want, what you like?”
Amanda bit her lip and shook her head without breaking eye contact.
“Are you being shy or do you like someone else running the show?”
An extra gleam appeared in her eyes as she nodded.
Just when she thought it impossible to be turned on any more. “Yes? To both?”
Another nod. “I don’t have to be, if—”
Quinn pressed a finger to her lips. “I want you to be exactly what you want to be. You just have to tell me if something isn’t good, okay?”
This time she smiled. “Okay.”
Even though it was their first time, she trusted Amanda to be honest. And being able to do things her way, at her pace, gave her confidence. She eased Amanda onto the bed and joined her. She continued kissing her, taking breaks here and there to explore her neck, the line of her shoulder, the swell of her breasts peeking over the top of her bra. Amanda sighed and made more of those perfect little noises.
Amanda’s hands roamed, tugging the hem of Quinn’s shirt and fussing over the buttons. “Why are you wearing so many clothes?”
She chuckled and eased just far enough away to shed her shirt.
“More.” Amanda pointed to her belt. “Here, I’ll help.”
“For being compliant, you sure can be bossy.”
Amanda laughed. Like, really laughed. But instead of killing the mood, it gave it a playful edge. Since she had a tendency toward the reverent, the lightness was a welcome addition. Amanda pulled at her belt, then her pants. She slid Amanda’s panties down her legs, then backtracked to dispense with her bra.
Pressing her body to Amanda’s, skin to skin, seemed to calm the fire in her and stoke it at the same time. As she pulled Amanda’s taut nipple into her mouth, she forgot about how long it had been or how nervous she’d felt when they started. All that remained was this gorgeous woman and a mountain of shared need.
She trailed her fingers along Amanda’s ribs, across the softness of her stomach that she’d tried to hide, and over the tops of her thighs. Amanda shifted, opened for her, in silent invitation. Well, not entirely silent. Without words, she gave Quinn every encouragement she could have asked for. And Quinn couldn’t resist.
Quinn slid over her, thinking to start slowly, give them both a chance to get used to the new intimacy. But Amanda was so wet, so slick and soft, she couldn’t hold her hand still. Up and down, small circles. The feel of Amanda under her was hypnotic.
And the sounds. Those sweet, sexy, pleading sounds. Did Amanda know how much they drove her crazy?
Amanda’s nails grazed Quinn’s back lightly as her hands roamed. Like the noises, it sent her senses haywire. It made her want to touch and taste everywhere at once. It made her ache to be inside Amanda, connected to her in the most intimate way possible.
As though reading her thoughts, Amanda opened her eyes and looked into Quinn’s. “More.”
That one word made Quinn’s breath hitch. It ratcheted up her own desire but made her want to give Amanda everything. She eased a finger into her and everything else—the sounds, the sensations, the wants—blurred. Every cell of her being focused on that connection, that perfect feeling so unlike anything else.
“More.” Part command, part plea, Amanda’s request just about made Quinn come undone.
She added a second finger. Amanda’s hips arched to meet her. Amanda’s body took her in, molded around her fingers like they were made for each other. They moved together in perfect rhythm, like they’d done this a thousand times before. It was, in short, perfection. Why had she been nervous, again?
Amanda arched and held; she convulsed around Quinn’s fingers. Heat poured from her, dripping over Quinn’s hand. She had been wrong before. This, this exact moment, was perfection.
She kissed Amanda’s forehead, her cheeks, her eyelids. When Amanda’s trembling finally stopped, Quinn kissed her mouth. Amanda continued to shudder, and each tremble sent a ripple of pleasure through her. She wouldn’t have said Amanda was the woman she’d been waiting for, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that it had been worth the wait.
She settled herself next to Amanda, overwhelmingly content. Her own desire, while not sated, became more of a simmer than a rolling boil. A strange sensation, but one she would happily revel in the rest of the night.
Before she could say so, Amanda squirmed away and rolled over. Quinn frowned. “Hey. Where are you going?”
“Don’t think you’re going to get away with being one-sided.” Amanda slinked down Quinn’s body.
“I don’t want you to feel—”
She finished neither the sentence nor the thought. Without any hesitation or buildup or anything else, Amanda’s mouth closed around her. Quinn bucked, the sheer intensity of it lifting her off the bed.
Amanda softened her movements, but she didn’t stop. Quinn’s body responded, following her lead and settling into a hypnotic rhythm. Quinn fisted her hands in the sheets, grasping for purchase against the torrent of sensation. It was as though Amanda knew her body, knew what to do and exactly how to do it.
The orgasm cascaded over her like rain, effortless but leaving her drenched. Amanda let out a contented hum and she came again, the second orgasm spilling into the first.
As her body continued to quake, Amanda crawled up the bed, kissing a line all the way up her torso to her mouth. Quinn blinked a few times, trying to get her eyes to focus. She wanted to say something of significance, but when she opened her mouth, all that came out was, “Wow.”
Amanda smiled. “I was thinking the same thing.”
“You’re amazing. And I’m pretty sure it isn’t just because I haven’t had sex in a really long time.”
She smirked. “Maybe a little of both.”
“No, no. I remember how it goes and that was spectacular.”
“I guess I can’t argue since I agree.”
Something about the comment made her chuckle. “Good.”
They stayed like that for a long while—Amanda stroking between her breasts and her fingers sliding lazily through Amanda’s hair. “Are you good? Do you need anything?”
Amanda patted her chest and offered her a sleepy smile. “So good. Thanks for inviting me over.”
She reached over and shut off the light. Amanda settled right back against her. If more than half her brain cells had been working, it might have freaked her out how perfectly they fit together. But at this point, she could barely keep her eyes open and couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt this content. “If you need something in the night, wake me up, okay?”
Another pat. “I won’t, but okay.”
Before she could argue, Amanda’s breathing evened out with the transition to sleep. Quinn, for all her tendencies to think and wonder and worry, wasn’t far behind.