The actors are running scenes onstage as I climb to the catwalk and take my official place behind the spot. I slide the iris lever, pull the motorcycle grips that control focus. I flip gels in and out, getting a feel for the light again.
I’m the spot op, I think.
And all it cost me was a half hour to put gas in Derek’s car.
It’s a small trade-off. Help Derek, and he helps you.
It seemed like such an awful thing before, but now that I’ve done it, it feels easy, even natural.
But then I think of Grace and Mindy, other techies who have been in Derek’s good graces. I think about what happened to them afterwards.
I’m different. That’s what I tell myself.
For one thing, I’m not a girl.
For another, I’m careful. Super careful.
Which means I’m going to be okay.
I pop the color boomerang and look through the gels that Derek has selected. The colors are rudimentary. Red, Blue, Green, Yellow.
Green makes you look like a monster. Red is passion. Yellow is day. Blue is night. All the color clichés.
Summer is not a cliché. She’s special. She needs a special light. I think about her hair, her skin tone. All the ways light could bring out the qualities I see in her.
I’ve got some sheets of gel nearby, nothing on Derek’s plan, just colors I like. I pull my utility knife and slice out a circle of pale amber. I hold it in front of my eyes, look at the stage through it.
I slide out Derek’s red gel and replace it with the amber.
It feels like I’m helping him. I’m on his team now, so I’m doing something to make the team better.
“Could we try the spot there?” Derek says in the house below.
“In the middle of the scene?” Mr. Apple says.
Derek lowers his voice so the actors can’t hear. But I’m above him, so I hear it all.
“The scene is a little boring,” he says to Mr. Apple. “This might spice it up.”
“You have a point,” Mr. Apple says. “We need as much spice as possible.”
Derek signals to Ignacio, Ignacio to Benno.
I hear Ignacio’s voice on headset. “Let’s get the spot up,” he says. “It’s all you, Z.”
“Will do,” I say.
I flip on the power supply, feel a thrill as the fan whirs to life inside the metal casing. I bend over, using the sight to aim where the beam will appear.
“Spot ready,” I say.
“Actors, stand by for spot,” Ignacio says. He’s being extra careful because of what happened to Miranda.
“Spot go,” Ignacio says.
I hold down the red button, wait for the spark to catch and fire across the gap. It takes less than a second for light to shoot from the end of the barrel.
Summer’s face is enveloped in a soft glow as if lit by candlelight. The effect is subtle to the audience, obvious to me. The wide, flat picture onstage now has dimension and intimacy.
Summer looks at Wesley with love in her eyes.
SUMMER
And I have found Demetrius like a jewel,
Mine own, and not mine own.
Only in my mind, she’s not talking to Wesley. She’s talking to me. I’m onstage with her, the two of us standing together in the light. She reaches for me…
WESLEY
Are you sure
That we are awake?
Wesley puts his arms around Summer. That snaps me back to reality.
I’m nowhere near the stage, nowhere near Summer.
I’m not the one who gets the girl; I’m the one who lights her.
So that’s what I do.
I pull the lever to slide a gel into the spot. Not just any gel. The amber one. The special color I chose.
A subtle rose hue blooms on Summer’s cheeks. Now she is even more beautiful in Wesley’s arms.
“Stop!” Derek shouts. “What’s going on up there?”
“I’m having a great time,” Wesley says, squeezing Summer hard against him.
Johanna’s fist clenches, ready to punch him.
“I mean up there,” Derek says, pointing to my spot.
I don’t say anything.
Derek races over to the tech table and grabs the headset out of Ignacio’s hands.
“What is that color, Z?”
“I was trying something,” I say.
“Oh, you were trying something,” he says. “Thank you so much for your input, but it won’t be needed.”
“I thought you might like it.”
“I like my light plot,” Derek says. “I’d appreciate if you would do your job and accomplish it for me.”
“I like this light,” Mr. Apple says.
Derek holds his hand over the mic.
“You mean you like the spot,” Derek says to him.
“I mean the color of the spot,” Mr. Apple says.
Derek holds his hand over his ear like he’s listening to something on the headset. Which is strange, because I’m not saying anything.
“Oh, that’s right,” Derek says like he’s speaking to me. “I did make that change. Thanks for reminding me, Z.”
He turns to Mr. Apple.
“Glad you like it,” Derek says. “That’s the new Act Four color.”
Mr. Apple raises one eyebrow.
“Excellent choice,” he says.
“Indeed,” Derek says. He hands the headset back to Ignacio.
“Well done then,” Mr. Apple says.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Reach says in my ear.