steven
After everyone stepped out of class, I helped Sierra pull her clothes back on and gave her privacy to gather her belongings. I needed to find my damn sister because we had a big fucking problem.
I caught a glimpse of her freshly dyed purple-brown hair across the bar and stormed toward her, grinding my teeth. She flirted with Frank Freddrick, a regular at the club, and one of his few wives.
“Oh, look who it is,” Michelle said, smiling at me. “How was class?”
“Fucking great,” I said, snatching her elbow and pulling her to the side of the room.
On our way, she downed her drink and set it on a table, where someone was bound to knock over the glass.
“What the fuck did you tell Sierra?”
Michelle played dumb and twirled her finger around a strand of her hair. “Oh, nothing.”
“Diamond necklace? Collar? Does that jog your memory?”
Someone had told Sierra about collars, and I would’ve bet that it was Michelle. It had to be.
“I just asked her if the diamond necklace you make her wear during your class is a collar,” she said, placing a hand on her chest. “I don’t think the poor thing even knew what it meant. Did she ask you about it?”
I gritted my teeth. “It’s not a collar.”
“Mmhmm.”
“It’s not.”
“And you two aren’t a couple then?” she asked. “You wouldn’t mind if she explored a bit more with other doms who might want to collar her? Because if not, I saw Frank staring her down when she walked in with you earlier.”
My head snapped to Frank, who stood at the bar, watching Sierra at the door. I balled my hands into fists and gritted my teeth. While Frank respected boundaries, there was no fucking way that I would let him near her. Not a fucking chance.
“Exactly what I thought,” Michelle said.
After turning back toward Michelle, I pressed my lips together. “I’ve already told you a million fucking times, Michelle. The answer is not going to change anytime soon. I’m not ready for that commitment.”
“You already bought her a diamond necklace,” Michelle said. “I know what it’s worth is like pocket change to you, but you’ve never done that. I want you to be happy, Steven, for once in your life. Stop being scared.”
I stared at her and ripped off some skin on my inner cheek. “I’m not scared.”
I was fucking terrified.
What if Sierra decided that I wasn’t worth it anymore and walked out of my life, like every other woman had? They were all gone, and I didn’t want Sierra to be another one on the list. I didn’t want to—I couldn’t—lose anyone else.
Michelle looked me up and down, then let out a breath. “It’s okay to be nervous.”
“You don’t understand,” I said, staring at the ground. “It’s hard.”
Michelle frowned. “I bet it’d be harder without her.”
Sierra stood by the classroom door, glancing around Radiant. When we made eye contact, she smiled softly, and my chest tightened. I didn’t want to be hurt again. I wanted to ignore all the pain, all the emotions that I had ever felt.
And just fuck.
I dropped my gaze as the thought drifted through my mind. It was a lie.
A damn lie that I had been drilling into my head since forever.
“Maybe you should invite her to Christmas dinner,” Michelle offered.
“I can’t do that.”
“Why not?”
“Because …” I started, attempting to find a reason why I shouldn’t invite Sierra to Christmas dinner.
She didn’t have a family to celebrate with either. Had she been spending all these holidays alone?
“Invite her!” Michelle said, walking back to her friends and tossing a smirk over her shoulder at me. “Or I will.”
Once she settled back into a conversation with Frank, I dropped my gaze and clenched my jaw. I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t fucking do this. Sierra was mine, but I was … scared to tell her the real reason for the necklace, the real reason I had crawled into the tub with her, the real reason I liked her being around.
“Steven,” Sierra said, grabbing on to my elbow from behind, “are you staying here?”
I swallowed my nerves, straightened myself out, then grabbed her hand. “Of course not. I still need to clean and feed you.”
“Are you sure?” she asked. “You look distraught. Did something happen?”
After wiping the stress off my face, I shook my head and guided her toward the exit near my car. “Don’t worry about it, love. I’m going to run a bath for us while Thornton makes us dinner. I’m going to take care of you tonight, like I always do.”