chapter 37

THE BIG PINK CLOUD

I am set at the Dragon. I am full of something to say. I put my head down and start.

Okay. Today I am thinking about light. Shafts of light. Because I got reminded about something. Something Benny Kilmartin said. A story he told. About that kind of weather when the clouds are dark. But then the sun puts stripes of itself down. Down from some holes in the clouds. Umm. It’s like. Beams. Sunbeams. Coming through. Yeah. So Benny said those are pathways. For people who die. The sunbeams are a way to get to heaven. So then I wonder if dead people have to lie below the shaft of light to get up there. Or do they climb. Like a ladder. So like maybe that is why a dead man would lie in a shaft. Like in the Caves of Lascaux. Dead man with a bird head. He could be waiting for the light to take him to heaven. And maybe Calvin will know that for sure. From his tablet.

I stop a minute. I think this: My story is mixed. Some things are past things. Some are right now. It happens because one thing makes me think of the other. I guess that’s okay. Better than being stuck.

I talk again:

So there was the lieutenant again. Just the other day. At the crumbledown. Asking the questions. It is getting harder now. Months going by. Like my brain is not hanging on so tight to the way it all was. Sequence. So umm I wonder what if I went back to that part again. And what I mean is the last part. When I ran in for supper. Trouble is that is the part gets the lieutenant upset. From that first time I tried to tell him. Way back. There was the thing that made Benny laugh. So hard. And what it was is how I skipped the ladder. I jumped down from the tree fort. Like too much of a jump. The kind of jump makes your arms go in a circle. Because you took too much air. And you need to do some flying right about then. Only. You are no bird. So then something in you knows you better roll. When you land. Roll your body. Roll out of trouble. That is how it was. I did that. Went rolling something wicked. My heels went right over my head. Two times. But I got right up on my feet. Standing again. Had apple blossom petals stuck all over me. Head to toe. And then I turned around. Saw Benny. Leaning out. Watching me. And he hollered to me. Mason. Are you all right? And I hollered, Yeah, I’m okay. And then Benny well he laughed. Enormous. And that laugh came out of his mouth in a huge pink cloud. Color of raspberries. Big puff in the orchard. And that is not the first time I saw some pink all around Benny Kilmartin. But it was the hugest. Hugest. Because pink is the color of laughing. Of joy. Of a friend.

I stop talking. Grind my forehead into my potato fists. This is going pretty okay. I should keep at it. I tell the Dragon more:

Umm. So. Trouble is. That is the part the lieutenant did not like. The pink. He does not think that is a true thing. Made him mad. At me. So I don’t tell that part to him anymore. Umm. Yeah. I skip about the pink cloud that came out of Benny’s mouth. And too bad. Because that was the most amazing of all the pink I have seen.

So umm. A few times now the lieutenant asked me. All big and loud. Why did you jump, Mason? And the answer is because I was not smart. The jump was too far. Tried to say that to him. Tried to say what I hollered to Benny before I left. Which was: Don’t try it. But the lieutenant was talking over my words. He said, Wasn’t it because you knew something was wrong with that ladder? Isn’t that why you jumped? Then he wanted to know did I throw away a handsaw. That one I had. From my birthday. He wanted to know did I toss that somewhere. In the orchard. In a ditch. And well I was thinking why would I do that? I said I did not toss it. But might be I did lose it. Somehow. And then he said I bet you did. And that was another time when Uncle Drum said we talked enough. And then the lieutenant asked me if I wanted to know why Benny fell? And I said yes. I figured he knew the puzzle. But umm he said something else. He said there was a weak rung on that ladder. And it broke. And he says I probably knew that. But I didn’t. I was pretty sure I built that ladder right. Apple ladder. Pretty tall one. Eight steps. Two nails in each side of those. I bought the wood and nails brand-new. At Bishell’s Hardware. And I got on it when it was done. Before Benny. To check it. Because I am way bigger. So if it would hold me it would hold Benny. Easy. So. Umm. Maybe I would have known when something went wrong with that rung. But I was not much for using the ladder. Because I am pretty good at climbing trees and dropping myself down from the branches. The ladder was for Benny. So. Umm. Well. And then the lieutenant asked me that same thing again. How did you decide you needed to jump down? Instead of climbing down on that ladder. Mason. How? I said I didn’t need to jump. I just did. And then I said the same thing as before. Again. I said it was not smart. Jumping down like I did. That part of the tree is too high. I said nobody should try that. I tell the lieutenant that part every time. But he still keeps coming back to ask.