DI Bradley had left the room to call the details in to his team that I’d given him.
‘What do you think’ll happen now?’ I asked Cliona as if she had the answers to everything.
She handed me a fresh tissue. The one in my shaking hand had already started to disintegrate from my tears.
‘I imagine they’ll want to speak to him as soon as possible, especially if there’s any chance at all that he may be responsible. They’ll want to try to find that poor woman who’s missing.’
‘I can’t imagine he would be responsible. He’s a good man. He’s always been a good man. I’d have known, surely, if he was capable of something like that …?’
‘You must try not to get yourself too upset,’ Cliona said, a worried look on her face. ‘Let’s wait until the police have spoken to him. Get all the information. It’s not wise to jump to conclusions. I know this is horribly distressing for you, but you’re still very vulnerable. I can speak to one of the nurses or the doctor to see if they’ll give you a sedative, maybe.’
I shook my head. I didn’t want a sedative. I didn’t want to be taken away from all this only to have it swoop back in again when I woke, like a fresh cut. I thought of that woman. Clare Taylor. How she’d looked at me. Resigned to the fact that she was dying. I saw the light go out in her eyes. Could someone I’d treated as if he were one of my own really have left a human being in that state – butchered, carved up and left to die?
I shook my head, sniffed. Tried to compose myself.
‘No. I need to know what’s happening,’ I said, even though I was weak and tired and really wishing that right now the light would go out in my own eyes. I’d had enough.
I’d lost too many people to tragedy. Seen too much hurt. In the theatres when I was nursing. On the farm. Losing my husband. Losing my children. Now, I could lose Michael and my grandchildren. If this was karma paying me back, she was a cruel mistress.
If only I’d known in the past, when things had seemed so bright, how it would all turn out …
I closed my eyes. Remembered the two little people playing in the yard, laughing together. Teasing each other mercilessly but with great affection. I remembered watching them through the window, the smell of my home baking making my tummy rumble. The feeling of my husband behind me, his arms slinking around my waist, him kissing the back of my neck and then joining me in watching our children play.
‘This is the life,’ he’d said.
I’d never felt as content in my life as I did in that moment. I felt untouchable – how wrong had I been?
DI Bradley came back into the room. I was scared of what he’d say to me.
‘We’ve gone to your son-in-law’s house and he’s not there. Nor is he at work. Can you think of anywhere else he might be?’
‘What time is it?’ I asked.
‘Just before three,’ Cliona said.
‘The school,’ I told him, my stomach sinking. ‘He’ll be picking the children up from school. St Patrick’s.’
‘And his car? Can you describe it? Do you know the vehicle registration? Don’t worry if you can’t, we can check with the DVLA. This might just be quicker.’
My thoughts were all so jumbled. My brain hadn’t knitted all my memories back into place yet. But I knew his car was silver. A Toyota. I couldn’t give any more details than that.
‘Thank you,’ DI Bradley said, putting his phone back to his ear and passing the information on to his colleagues.
He hung up and stood awkwardly at the end of my bed.
‘I’m so very sorry, Elizabeth,’ he said.
All I could do was nod.
‘The children?’ I asked.
‘My team will be as discreet as possible,’ he said. ‘They’re aware that he’s picking the children up and that other children will be present. They’ll have informed the school and have liaison officers in place. The children will be looked after, so try not to worry. I know that sounds impossible.’
‘Thank you,’ I said.
‘Elizabeth, I have to ask, have you had any reason at all to suspect Michael before now? Have you witnessed any behaviour that might have indicated a violent nature? His relationship with your daughter?’
I shook my head. No matter how I ran it through my head, I couldn’t say that until a few minutes ago I’d ever considered him capable of hurting anyone. He was as gentle as Laura had been. But did everyone have their limit? Did everyone have a breaking point in the right circumstances? Were we all capable of horrendous crimes if pushed far enough?
‘And he’s the only person you can think of who’d have had access to your home, to your photographs? Who would have known the intimate details of how Laura died and about the flowers. Someone who’d have known about her classmates.’
‘I think so,’ I muttered, becoming aware of Cliona shifting awkwardly in her seat.
‘Elizabeth …’ she began, but we were interrupted by the ringing of DI Bradley’s phone.
He answered it, his eyes on me as he spoke.
‘Right, well that’s enough for an arrest in itself. Oh … okay. Good. Good. Get him booked in and I’ll be there as soon as I can. Any mention or sign of her? No? Okay. Right. See you soon.’
I felt as if the air had been pulled from my lungs and I gripped Cliona’s hand tightly.
‘Michael O’Neill’s in police custody now, Elizabeth. And I’m sorry to have to tell you, my team have uncovered some evidence that appears to link him directly to Rachel Walker.’
I didn’t think my heart could break any more. Oh, Michael, I thought, what have you done?