87.

STAY PLAYFUL

As I reflect on the qualities of my family that keep us close to one another and on those memories that I hold dearest to my heart, up near the top of the list is that all of us are very playful together. Over the years, I’ve noticed a similar playfulness in many other families that seem truly grateful and happy to be together.

Being playful is a joyful quality. It keeps you laughing and smiling. It reminds you to not take yourself, or the other members of your family, too seriously. Being playful keeps you lighthearted and relaxed. It allows you to keep your heart open to those around you and to bounce back from setbacks. It removes much of the defensiveness that tends to occur in families and allows you to kid around with one another when appropriate. It also helps you stay connected when a heart-to-heart talk is in order.

It always seems so sad to me when I see people who have lost their sense of playfulness. They seem so serious, always on the verge of being upset and treating virtually everything as an emergency. Overly serious people often have a frown or look of disapproval on their faces and seldom experience the joy of simple things. Needless to say, people who aren’t playful are constantly sweating the small stuff.

Being playful can mean anything from the ability to truly laugh at yourself to being open to new things. It can mean rolling around on the floor and roughhousing with your children or playing silly games with your spouse or tickling each other in the middle of the night. What you do isn’t so important as the fact that you lighten up.

If you feel you’ve lost your sense of playfulness, don’t worry—it’s easy to get back. Start by smiling. Go ahead, give it a try. Then start to observe others who are playful. And rather than dismissing their behavior as light-minded, think of it as lighthearted. Being playful is innocent. It doesn’t hurt anyone; in fact, it’s a healing and refreshing attitude. As you observe others who are genuinely playful, notice how happy they are and how they bring out the best in others.

If you’d like to be more playful, you don’t have to change your essential personality. Rather, take baby steps. Anything you can do to become a little less serious will be well received by virtually everyone you come in contact with. In fact, it can be the difference between someone’s really enjoying your company and someone’s keeping his or her distance. In addition, and perhaps most important, you’ll find yourself becoming more philosophical and easygoing. The daily hassles we all must face won’t seem like such a big deal and you will stop sweating the small stuff.