“Shit!” I hit the end call button on my phone with an angry jab of my thumb. “His phone is going straight to voicemail.”
“Of course it is.” Arrow sounded bored. “He’s not an idiot.”
Rowen had definitely thought this through. He’d taken the keys to both our vehicles, leaving us stranded. I called Tash next, hoping she’d be good for a ride. Jett’s car was drivable but in need of work, and Rubi was likely studying or sleeping. When Tash didn’t answer, my irritation turned into sheer frustration.
“It would be nice if you could act like you give a shit,” I snapped. “You’re part of the reason he’s doing this. Whatever exactly he’s doing.”
Arrow regarded me with a raised brow and an eye roll. A mug of coffee clutched in hand, he watched me rush frantically around the kitchen. “Sure. But you’re the straw that broke the camel’s back.”
That stopped me in my tracks. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means that it may have started with Rowen wanting to protect me, but it was you that drove him over the edge. Once Dash made you a target, it was just a matter of time.” He gestured with his cup toward the bathroom. “Can I grab a shower before you drag me to Dash’s?”
I gaped at him in disbelief. “We do not have time for that. Is your cleanliness really a priority over your brother’s soul?”
Arrow sighed, a heavily dramatized sound for my benefit. “Of course not. But whether you want to agree with me or not, Rowen knows what he’s doing. He’s not the type to make impulsive decisions. Do you at least have a clean shirt I can borrow?”
His confidence in Rowen was admirable, and though Rowen had the freedom to make his own decisions, I had a calling that stated I couldn’t just sit back and do nothing while he handed himself over to the dark.
“Get us a ride to Dash’s house, and I’ll see what I can dig up,” I muttered, stalking into my bedroom with clenched fists. “By the way, I think you owe both Rowen and me for that shit you pulled last night. You’ve clearly lost your damn mind. I’m not sure I can even trust you.”
I hurriedly changed into jeans and a tank top. Because I wasn’t taking any chances, I slung the Midnight Star onto my back in its sheath and grabbed the smaller silver dagger that fit into my boot. I was prepared to use either on anyone who gave me a reason to. Arrow included.
“That wasn’t me, Spike,” Arrow called after me. “Come on, you know that. I’ve had demons fucking around inside my head. I can’t be blamed for that.”
I made a grimace he couldn’t see. Perhaps I couldn’t know what he’d suffered because of Dash. However, after having him threaten my life, twice, I was opting for caution.
After digging through a stack of t-shirts in the back of my closet, I found a Crimson Sin shirt that should fit. With a silent snicker to myself, I decided it would do.
“Why the hell would Dash ever make you try to kill Rowen?” I asked when I rejoined him in the kitchen. “That makes no sense. He wants Rowen alive.”
“Yeah, Dash does. But who’s to say that someone else doesn’t have plans of their own?” He caught the shirt I tossed and scowled at the logo. “Seriously?”
“Take it or leave it.” I shrugged. “I suspect Koda wants to get rid of Rowen. He was there last night. But wouldn’t he want to reunite the triad as well?”
Arrow stripped off the shirt he wore and tossed it over the back of the easy chair in the living room. His pants were slung low, giving me a glimpse of the four leaf clover boxers he wore underneath. “Who knows? Only Koda can answer that question. All I know is I’d never try to kill Rowen without some kind of demon influence.”
“But I’m fair game? Thanks, dude.” My gaze was drawn to the raven on his hip. It was a finely done piece. When he caught me looking, I turned away, embarrassed. “Did you get us a ride yet?”
A sneer crossed his face, and I anticipated a snarky remark. Instead he checked his phone and nodded. “Sam said he’ll be here in fifteen. And for the record, I’ve never wanted to kill you.”
I waited for more, an insult tacked on to the end of that statement. It never came. “Fine,” I said, grabbing my jacket. “Let’s go wait downstairs for him.”
Every moment that passed while waiting for Sam throbbed in agony. I stood in the lobby where it was warm while Arrow smoked outside. I wasn’t sure what we’d be walking into, and though I’d hoped Cinder would’ve dropped in by now, his absence was a reminder that I couldn’t rely on him for everything. It wasn’t unusual for a few days to pass without any sign of him. Angels were busy.
It took seventeen minutes for Sam to arrive. During that time I considered the many awful things that Rowen could be facing while we were stuck here. I followed Arrow to the older Jeep Grand Cherokee in front of the building, surprised when he got in the back and left the front to me.
“Hey, guys,” Sam greeted us. “Everything ok?”
Arrow lit another cigarette and sucked in a lungful before saying, “It’s kind of one of those don’t ask don’t tell deals, Sammy.”
Not content to take such a shady response, Sam caught Arrow’s eye in the rearview mirror. “Does this have anything to do with the shit that went down at The Spirit Room last night?”
“It might. Sorry if I scared you, bud. Haven’t quite been myself lately.” Arrow slumped in his seat and puffed on his smoke, refusing to elaborate further.
Sam glanced at me and I shrugged. Seeing that he wouldn’t get anything out of either of us, he put the Jeep in gear and drove.
With every block that took us closer to the house Dash had overtaken as his own, my heart raced faster. By the time we turned into his neighborhood, my palms were sweaty, and it took great effort to breathe evenly.
“Just let us out here,” Arrow instructed. “Thanks, bro.”
“Thank you, Sam,” I added. “I appreciate this.”
He pulled the Jeep over and stopped, forcing a smile that did nothing to hide his evident worry. “No problem. Feel free to tell Jett how nice a guy I am. And be careful.”
With every step toward the demon’s house, my body tightened until I was so stiff I thought I might just shatter into thousands of pieces. When we rounded the bend and found Rowen’s black Charger on the street outside, I faltered.
“Let me handle this,” Arrow said. He grabbed my arm and dragged me back into motion. “If you go in there like a raging, pissed-off girlfriend, you’ll get us both killed. Or worse.”
I shot him a glower that was wasted on someone so disenchanted. “I’m not going in there like a pissed-off girlfriend. I’m going in there as a white lighter who’s sick of Dash’s manipulative shit.”
Arrow jerked me around to face him. The demon’s house loomed silently over us, a vengeful structure even in the late afternoon light. The sun set earlier in the winter. In less than an hour, Dash would be able to take physical form. However, I still expected him to be there. He could easily manifest by possessing one of his witches, who undoubtedly were inside.
“I can guarantee you that Dash is expecting you to come in there all worked up and emotionally charged. That shit will end you. So take a deep breath, calm the fuck down, and don’t let emotion cloud your logic.”
He marched up to the heavy iron gate and hit a button on the intercom. It crackled a few times before a female voice said, “Yes?”
“Open the fucking gate, Skylar,” Arrow snapped. “I’ll get in anyway, so you might as well let me in.”
There was a moment of silence. With a squeal of metal, the gate swung open, and we stepped onto the property. I froze, expecting the hellhounds that had accosted us the last time we came here for Rowen. I had a bad feeling this visit wouldn’t end the same way.
“They’re not out right now,” Arrow said, striding up the front step. “Which means they’re expecting us.” He banged on the door before trying the handle. It was locked.
The door swung open, and Skylar stood in the threshold with a scowl. “I was wondering when you’d show up.” Her ice-blue gaze pierced me. In one blink her eyes were red. Dash’s eyes. It was his voice that came out of her. “Spike, you shouldn’t have bothered.”
“I’ll make that decision for myself.” I drew myself up to my full height, refusing to cower before Dash.
Skylar turned away, her black ponytail swinging. Her gait was smooth but heavy. Dash didn’t have a dainty bone in his body, and it showed when he possessed a woman.
Arrow closed the door and fell into step behind the demon. I followed them both, fighting for calm breaths as I feared what we would find. Where was Rowen?
“We were just having a little chat,” Dash said, rounding the corner to the library. “I suppose you can join us, although I’m sure you’ll wish you hadn’t.”
The library was outstanding, like something right out of a movie. Floor to ceiling, books lined the walls. A quick glance revealed that most of them weren’t in English and most likely were not written by humans. A large throne-like chair sat in front of a blazing hearth. It sat at the head of a semicircle made up of a large table and several smaller chairs. Rowen sat in one of them.
Dash, in Skylar’s body, sauntered up to the throne-like chair and sat down, gesturing for us to take a seat. Arrow took a spot beside his brother. I sat as far from Dash as I could get, which meant sitting next to nobody; I was too emotional to get too close.
“You’re both right in time,” Dash said, his voice so wrong in Skylar’s grinning face. “We were just making a deal.”
“Like hell you are.” Arrow twisted in his chair to stab Rowen with a sharp glare. “What in the fuck are you doing here, bro?”
Rowen leaned forward, propped his elbows on the table, and put a hand to his head. Brow furrowed and chest heaving, he was obviously distressed. Even though Arrow had demanded an answer, Rowen looked at me when he replied, “I’m doing what I have to do. I can’t sit back and do nothing while the two of you face constant danger. Please, try to understand.”
“Understand what?” My voice was loud in the vast room. “That you’re going to turn your back on everything you stand for and give Dash exactly what he wants? I will never understand that, Rowen.”
Dash sat back in his chair with hands together, fingers steepled, watching the exchange with obvious delight. So badly I wanted to slice the fucker’s head off again but being in Skylar’s body gave him an advantage. I couldn’t hurt him without hurting her, and no matter how shitty of a person she was, murder was not the answer here.
“I’m sorry, Spike. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. That’s why I’m here.” Misery filled Rowen’s amber gaze. He really believed this was what he had to do.
I bit my tongue to hold back the angry, wounded retort that burned in my throat. Shaking my head, I looked to Arrow to speak some sense into his brother, though that might have been hoping for too much.
“Dude,” Arrow jumped in. “Giving this fucker what he wants is stupid. You’re better than this.”
This was weird. Teaming up with Arrow of all people was strange enough, but us against Rowen felt downright bizarre. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.
“Rowen,” Dash broke in. “I believe we were in the middle of something before these two so rudely interrupted. Can we get back to our previous discussion?” Dash didn’t wait for a reply. He pushed on, knowing he had all three of us right where he wanted us. “I do believe we struck a deal.”
“No.” The table shook as Arrow slammed a fist on top of it. “No fucking deals. Rowen, you can’t do this.”
Using Skylar’s body, Dash flung Arrow off his chair with a flick of her wrist. He hit the floor hard, throwing an arm up to block the chair that crashed down on top of him.
“You were not invited here, Arrow. If you can’t behave yourself, you will be forced to leave.” Dash’s gaze swung toward the window. “The sun is setting soon. If you’re smart you’ll leave before then. I’ve reached my breaking point with you, boy.”
My palms tingled, and I thought I might have to sit on my hands to keep from throwing a fireball in Skylar’s face. Still I worried that Arrow would push Dash too far and get us all killed.
“Is that so?” Arrow got up with a sneer and righted his chair with a slam of the legs against the floor. “Well, the feeling is fuckin’ mutual.”
Rowen loudly cleared his throat, drawing all eyes to him. “Can we get on with this? I told you, Dash, I have conditions that must be met.”
I couldn’t breathe. My entire reality tumbled onto its head. Rowen was light, a genuine soul. How could he be sitting here making a deal with a demon? My chest hurt as my heart shattered.
“Yes, I know. As do I. Would you like to go first?” Skylar’s long nails clicked on the tabletop as Dash waited expectantly.
The urge to scream built inside me. Was I supposed to sit here and allow this to happen? Could I even stop it? Rowen’s free will was his own. There was nothing I could do but sit frozen, listening in growing horror.
Rowen looked my way, such pleading and anguish on his face. Had he really thought I’d stay away? Dragging his gaze from me to Dash, he said, “You leave Spike alone. Stay away from her friends, her family, and her. No exceptions. No technicalities. Arrow too. Whatever you did to him to get inside his head, it stops now. Never again. They walk out of here alive, and you never mess with either of them again.”
Dash considered this with a nod while running fingers through Skylar’s ponytail. It was creepy as hell to see her sitting there knowing she wasn’t the one peering out at us.
“I killed someone, against my will,” Arrow interjected, clenching his hands into fists. “There’s no fixing that. You owe me, Dash.”
Dash ignored Arrow, directing his comment to Rowen. “Consider it done. In exchange I want your word that you and Spike will no longer be romantically involved. I know well how women can manipulate men with sex and emotions. If we’re to work together, I need to know there will be no chance of that.”
For a moment I could hear only the sound of my own heart. My mouth turned so dry I couldn’t even swallow. He knew. Rowen friggin’ knew this was coming. Why else would he be so strange last night? And the ring… my gaze dropped to it, and all I felt was a sick sense of betrayal.
“Fine. You have my word that my relationship with Spike is over.”
Rowen’s words wounded me, hitting me hard in the place deep down where I’d harbored my fears and mistrust. Too many times I’d been hurt. After shying away from commitment for so long, he had softened me, and I’d dared to let him in. And this was where that risk had led me.
Dash turned to me, Skylar’s face expressionless. “Don’t look so crushed, my dear. It will be better for you both in the long run. I never would have given up on having him. This way, you get to live. Consider yourself lucky.”
“Fuck. You.” Teeth clenched, palms burning, I gripped the arms of my chair so hard my fingers ached. To Rowen, I said, “How can you do this to me, to us?”
Rowen sat rigid in his seat. He seemed to be having a hard time meeting my eyes. His gaze kept dropping to his lap. “I’m doing this for you, Spike. I love you too much to watch him destroy you because of me. I’m so sorry. Please try to see it from my side.”
I shook. My hands trembled and my lower lip quivered. Never had I felt so exposed. My greatest personal weakness lay exposed, on display for the demon I hated most to gloat over. “We’re supposed to be a team. You and me against the world. And especially him. You’ve betrayed everything I thought I knew about us. I can’t believe this. I trusted you.” Even my voice sounded weak and pathetic, like the life had been sucked out of me.
“Angel girl is right, Rowen,” Arrow said, sliding a suspicious glance his brother’s way. “You’re not this guy. What the hell are you doing?”
The moment went dead quiet as the two brothers stared at one another. Rowen visibly fought to stay calm and still. This wasn’t easy for him, but though I found a semblance of comfort in that, it wasn’t enough.
“I’m saving you both,” he said softly. “I’m sorry, but I have to do this.”
“No, you fucking don’t,” Arrow hissed angrily.
His protest fell on deaf ears. Rowen had made up his mind, and he wouldn’t be swayed.
I wanted to fight for him. To beg and plead and promise. But seeing the determined set to his jaw and the trembling hands he tried to hide, I knew it would only make this hurt so much worse than it already did. In Rowen’s mind, this was him laying down his life for those he loved. I just wished he didn’t have to break my heart to do it.
Because I couldn’t stand to look at Skylar’s smirking face a moment longer, I got up and headed for the door. Silent tears streamed down my face. I hadn’t even felt them coming.
“Arrow, you’re out.” Dash’s voice followed me. “Out of my coven and out of this house. You should probably leave now.”
As I stepped from the room, there was a loud scrape as Arrow shoved his chair back. “You think you’ve won, Dash, but I promise I’ll find a way to fuck you over. Good job, Rowen. You’re the asshole brother now. How does that feel?” Arrow’s long, heavy strides helped him catch up with me before I reached the front door. “We don’t have to leave, you know. We can stay and fight.”
Without pausing I flung open the door and stepped from the warm house into the frozen winter outside. “What’s the point? He’s made his choice.”
I let a curtain of black tresses fall to hide my face so he wouldn’t see my tears. They continued to spill down my face, and I wondered how long it would take them to freeze.
“Come on, Spike. Where’s your fire?” Arrow nudged me, trying to stoke my spirit.
“Rowen just put it out. I went in there armed, ready for a fight. In ten minutes everything changed. I don’t even know how to feel right now.” I kept walking, down the front step and through the open gate. I couldn’t think straight, and I knew if I stayed and listened to Arrow I might very well end up dead.
“Hey, Spike.” When I didn’t stop or reply, Arrow grabbed my arm and jerked me to a halt. He took in the sight of my tear-stained face and whatever he’d been about to say died on his lips. “I’m sorry he did that to you, especially in front of Dash. But you know he loves you.”
I shook my head and sucked in a frigid breath. “All I know is that he didn’t give us a chance. Instead of trusting that we could face Dash together, he abandoned me.”
Pulling away, I kept walking. It was going to be a long, cold walk home. I’d have to call a cab.
Arrow matched my hurried pace. Despite the lung-crushing chill, he lit up a cigarette. “I’ll call Sam to come back. I’m not letting you walk the streets alone like this.”
After making a call to Sam, Arrow grew quiet. Smoking cigarette after cigarette he walked beside me in heavy silence. For a guy who could be such a class A jackass, he had his moments when I thought he might be human inside after all.
One foot in front of the other. That was all I could focus on. Every step felt like agony. The wind bit at my cheeks, icing my nose. I didn’t care. I could no longer feel.