Politicians aren’t getting much respect these days—but then, it sounds like they don’t deserve much, either.
“Wherever I have gone in this country, I have found Americans.”
—Alf Landon (R-KS)
“We shall reach greater and greater platitudes of achievement.”
—Richard J. Daley (D), mayor of Chicago
“I hope I stand for anti-bigotry, anti-Semitism, anti-racism.”
—George H. W. Bush
“This is the worst disaster in California since I was elected.”
—Gov. Pat Brown (D-CA), discussing a flood
“Mr. Nixon was the thirty-seventh president of the United States. He had been preceded by thirty-six others.”
—Gerald Ford
“If God had wanted us to use the metric system, Jesus would have had ten apostles.”
—Jesse Helms (R-NC)
“This legislation has far-reaching ramifistations.”
—Gib Lewis (D-TX)
“I didn’t intend for this to take on a political tone. I’m just here for the drugs.”
—Nancy Reagan, asked a political question during a “Just Say No” rally
“I am not a chauvinist, obviously.…I believe in women’s rights for every woman but my own.”
—Harold Washington (D), mayor of Chicago, 1984–87
“Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, ‘Thank God, I’m still alive.’ But, of course, those who died—their lives will never be the same again.”
—Barbara Boxer (D-CA)
“The state of California has no business subsidizing intellectual curiosity.”
—Gov. Ronald Reagan, (R-CA), responding to student protests on college campuses
“Politics would be a helluva good business if it weren’t for the goddamned people.”
—Richard Nixon
Southclaw: Most parrots are left-handed.