“Soldier, down.” Jax was laughing, but trying hard to hide it. His damned dog was too quick. The moment Marissa stepped from her SUV, the dog had lost interest in her tires and turned to her. She held a pink box aloft over her head and squirmed under Soldier’s wet onslaught.
The shepherd seldom had this reaction to people, so Jax hadn’t been prepared. “Down, boy.” He pulled on the leash with one hand and the collar with the other.
It took some doing, but he finally managed to pry Soldier off Marissa. Until she smiled, he wasn’t sure if she would climb back in her SUV and drive off.
She bent down and patted the beast on the head. “You should invest in some doggie mints.” She scratched behind his ear, then gave a final pat atop his head. “Good guard dog you got there.”
“You got the tame version.” He pressed his hand to the small of her back as he walked her up to his door.
“I’d hate to see the other version.”
“You won’t.” Once Soldier liked someone, really liked them, there was no other side. There were only a handful of people, maybe less, to whom he reacted that way. All were Jax’s closest friends. Never once had it been one of his “dates.” Not that he and Marissa were dating. Hell, he didn’t even know what they were doing. Most times, though, he’d give anything for more of it.
Once inside the house, he unhooked Soldier’s leash and flipped on the overhead light in the living room. The dog ran in circles picking up one toy after another to show them to their new guest. Once he’d made the rounds, he came over and licked her hand one final time, then settled down on his mat beside the sofa.
“I’ve always wanted a dog,” Marissa said almost wistfully as she sat on the end of the sofa farthest from the dog.
“You’ve never had a dog?” Jax sat next to her. Not close enough to invade her space, but close enough he could touch her easily.
“I’ve never had a pet of any kind. My mom…” Her voice caught. “My mom was allergic.” She shook herself. “I didn’t come over here to discuss my, um, pets or lack thereof.”
Jax hooked the leashed on the peg beside the door. “Why did you come over? It wasn’t just to bring me cupcakes,” he said as he pulled one from the box and sat next to her on the sofa. He took a bite while he waited for Marissa to get to her reason for coming over.
Marissa wrung her hands in front of her, then released them, then wrung them again.
“Is everything okay?” He set the cupcake on the end table and settled his hand on her arm, hoping to reassure her even as his own pulsed ratcheted up a notch. “Did something…”
“No. I just wondered… Hypothetically, if someone is breaking the law, but for the right reason—”
“They’re still breaking the law.” He said it without hesitation.
“What if they’re not technically breaking the law, but doing something wrong?”
“Where are you going with this, Marissa?”
“Nowhere.” She leaned back and picked at a piece of lint on the arm of the sofa. “Just making conversation.
“You know you can talk to me, right? About anything.”
“Sure. Same goes for you.” Her gaze dropped to his mouth. “You have a little icing,” she motioned to the corner of his lips.
Jax swiped at it.
“You missed.” Marissa shifted and leaned into Jax. “Here.” She darted her tongue out and licked the corner of his mouth. “I got it for you.”
As distractions went, it was top notch. He was determined to get her back on topic. At some point. Later. He wrapped his hands around her waist and pulled her onto his lap.
Marissa leaned forward and placed her lips on his. It was as thrilling as their first kiss. He hadn’t thought it was possible time after time to get the rush, the anticipation and want all rolled into one.
He teased the seam of her lips with his tongue. It was all the nudge she needed to open to him. Marissa parted her lips and slid her tongue along his, heating whatever part of him had lagged behind from the initial touch. She leaned closer, set her hand on his face, her thumb tracing a soft path over his chin.
God, how he longed for her touch. Even when she was in his arms he wanted more. He wanted to all but devour her, but the last time they were together, it had been rushed. And even the first time, he’d taken her on the sofa in her living room. He wanted to savor Marissa.
Without warning, he stood, scooping her up in his arms.
“Jax?”
“Marissa.” He kissed the tip of her nose. He nuzzled her neck as he carried her down the hall to his bedroom.
She moaned and leaned in closer to him.
In the bedroom, he kicked the door shut. He didn’t want Soldier to wander in at an inopportune moment. No, he wanted Marissa’s undivided attention all to himself. He set her in the middle of his bed.
He’d already shed his utility belt when he’d gotten home from work, but still had on his shirt with the badge pinned to his left pocket, so he removed it and kicked off his shoes. Marissa levered herself up on her elbows and watched. When Jax set his knee on the bed next her, she shifted.
Had she changed her mind?
No, she shifted her feet to the edge and kicked off her own shoes, then turned back to him.
“Are you sure you want to—”
She captured his mouth again, answering his question. She pulled him back with her as she leaned against the pillows. Her fingers played at the hair at his nape before they slid down his back. Her fingers on his bare skin tantalized him, promised of more to come.
Jax propped himself up on one elbow, then tugged at the T-shirt tucked into the top of her jeans. When he pulled it free, he settled his hand on her flat belly, then up to her lace-covered breast. He held the weight in his hand, just let the warmth spread through him.
“Jax.” Marissa pulled her mouth free and kissed his jaw. “What is this between us?”
If he only knew. No woman had made him want so strongly. What could he say? He wasn’t in a place to tell her he loved her. Hell, it shocked him to even think the words to himself, but damned if the ache didn’t start from the depths of his bones. “What it is, is good.” He trailed kisses over her T-shirt and captured her taught nipple through the layers of clothing.
Marissa arched her back, groaned and pushed him away. She leaned up and ripped her T-shirt up over her head and removed her bra. She waggled her eyebrows at him. “Better?”
Jax released a husky laugh, then captured the pink bud in his mouth. He laved it taut, then asked her the same thing. “Better?”
Marissa did little more than moan. “Mmm-hmm.”
He then kissed his way down to the top of her jeans. He took his time with the button and the zipper, his tongue trailing along the edge. Marissa sank her hands in his hair. “Need to get rid of these.” Jax tugged on the top of her jeans and helped her shimmy them, as well as her bright blue panties, down her legs. She squirmed a little as she lay bare before him, but he soothed her with small bites and kisses up her leg, stopping to run his tongue on the back of her knee. Then he dropped feather-light kisses up the inside of her thigh. When he reached the crook of her leg he repeated the action on the other leg.
“Jax, you’re killing me.”
He chuckled. “I think you’ll survive.” He settled his mouth over her and her hips shot off the bed. Her grip tightened in his hair, and it spurred him on as he ran his tongue across her swollen nub.
He’d never before wanted to pleasure someone as much as he did Marissa. He didn’t think he was a selfish lover, but this was the first time that it was the first and foremost thing on his mind.
When he had her all but shuddering under his ministrations, he eased back, slid a finger inside and pumped into her. Then he added a second, stretching her, readying her for him as she arched farther off the bed.
“Jax…close,” Marissa panted. “Stop.”
He slowed his rhythm.
Marissa frowned down at him. “Don’t stop.”
Jax kissed the inside of her thigh and chuckled. He returned the pressure and the rhythm until a warm rush engulfed his fingers and she cried out.
While she lay exhausted, he stood, shucked the remainder of his clothes, then slowly climbed up beside her on the bed.
Marissa slowly opened her eyes. A slow smile crawled across her mouth. “Wowzers.”
Jax bit back his own smile. “Wowzers? Is that all you’ve got?”
“You—” she slapped a hand on his bare biceps “—are quite conceited there, Chief.”
Jax shot one eyebrow skyward. “When it’s the truth it’s not conceited, now is it?”
Marissa giggled and leaned up to meet him, her lips slanting across his. She wrapped her leg around his hip and guided him down atop her. “Well, let’s see if you can keep up the streak.”
Jax entered her smoothly and stayed still. He wanted to cherish her warmth as she enveloped him. God, he didn’t think he could ever get enough of this woman. She touched places in him he hadn’t thought anyone would ever have access to. Not until she’d come into his world.
There were so many obstacles he had to overcome with her. But he relished the idea of earning her trust, working through their issues until she was his.
The thought shook him a little. Mostly because he recognized the rightness of it. He pumped into her slowly at first, then with a fierceness that spoke of the burgeoning feelings rocketing through him.
She looked at him. There was trust there. She couldn’t give herself to him so freely if there wasn’t. She just wasn’t ready to take it to the next level.
He was patient.
There was also something more. Something that smoldered just behind. More than lust. Something he wasn’t quite ready to put a name to, either, but it was enough to send him tumbling over the edge into the most powerful climax he’d ever had.
His arms shook as he levered himself down to lie beside her. She didn’t hesitate to snuggle up next to him, fitting her head snuggly under his. He wrapped his arm over her waist and pulled her flush against him.
This was where he wanted her to stay, from now to forever. He wasn’t entirely sure, but just as he dozed off he thought the words may have escaped him, his plea whispered softly into her ear.
Marissa lay in the warm cocoon Jax created for her with his own body. He’d asked her to stay, but to be honest she wasn’t sure if he meant for the night or forever. Either way, she couldn’t. He could love her. She was almost sure of it. He would take care of her. But she’d been alone for so long, taken care of herself by herself for so long she wasn’t sure she could open enough to him.
But as she snuggled closer to him, any thoughts that she might be falling in love with him were quickly whisked away. There was no might. She was full-blown, head-over-heels for the man. And it seemed mutual. A man couldn’t make love to a woman like that, holding nothing back, giving and giving without a little bit of love.
What she worried about, though, was would it be enough? Was love enough to overlook the differences that seemed miniscule in the throes of fantastic lovemaking, but Grand Canyon–huge in the light of day?
She must have dozed off. When she woke, she shifted and found a blanket covering her and Jax. Pale moonlight streamed in through the parted slats of the blinds at the windows. She shifted and looked around to get her bearings. Her head now lay on his left arm. His right arm was thrown over his eyes. It was half past three according to the clock on his nightstand.
Should she cuddle back up to Jax and sleep with more comfort and safety than she had in who knows how long, or get up and leave before she did something stupid like profess her love for the man?
As cowardly as it was, she opted for sneaking out—though she preferred to notch it up as consideration. She didn’t want to wake him. His workweek had been hellish. He needed his sleep. Plus, he’d had a busy evening. Delight washed through her body. Oh, how he’d been busy.
Marissa eased off the bed, careful not to jostle Jax. Once on her feet, she hunted around in the dark for her clothes. She found her jeans—though no panties—at the foot of the bed. She slipped into her jeans commando. It was all she could do not to get all self-conscious and cover her breast as she hunted for her bra and shirt. Finally after what seemed like an interminable about of time, she found both wadded up by his bedroom door.
She finished getting dressed and walked to the side of the bed to retrieve her shoes. She almost slipped back into the bed when she looked down at the gorgeous sleeping man. She’d seen him naked the night before, but she’d hardly been in a position to ogle and appreciate. Marissa shook herself. She needed to get home. The last thing she wanted to do was take the walk of shame first thing in the morning in front of a teenager. She snatched up her sneakers, then hurried out of the bedroom before she talked herself out of leaving. In the living room she sat on the sofa to slip on her shoes and came nose-to-snout with Soldier. She bit back a solid yelp. She’d all but forgotten about the large dog. But he hadn’t forgotten about her. He pushed in closer to her until he was breathing on her neck.
“Get back, boy.” She pushed against him but he didn’t budge. She rubbed the top of his head and behind his ear, which only made him move in closer. Giving up on her shoes, Marissa used both hands and petted him, rubbed him and all but hugged him. “You are a cutie, aren’t you?” She bent her head close to his and hugged the shepherd to her.
When he was finally satisfied with her petting, he backed away and settled himself back onto his bed.
Marissa moaned before she could help herself. She even liked the man’s damned dog.
She tied her shoes and scooped up her purse. She gave one final glance back toward the bedroom. She needed to leave. She was so confused, she didn’t think her self-preservation could take staying there with Jax one moment longer. She made sure his front door locked as she snuck out.
She cut her lights before she even pulled into her driveway. Once in the house, she found her note right where she’d left it. She tore it up and tucked it down deep in the trash chiding herself every step of the way. She was being completely silly. She was a grown woman who had the right to do whatever the hell she wanted, with whomever she wanted. She didn’t have to answer to anyone.
The little speech didn’t stop her from tiptoeing up the stairs to her bedroom, though. Once in there, she didn’t even bother to undress, just lay atop her comforter sans her shoes and rehashed the night. For hours, despite being bone-weary—and damned good sex—tired she couldn’t do anything more than lie there and think. Think about Jax lying naked as she left. Jax plunging into her. Hell, even Jax holding her tenderly afterward, all of it left her more keyed up than when she’d driven over to his house in the middle of the night. She had it bad.
As dawn crept from behind her curtains, her gritty eyes fluttered slightly, finally ready to give up, but now she didn’t have time. She had to get up and get to the shop. She had the order for the bridal shower to work on, not to mention a birthday-party order she’d taken nearly a month earlier that was due the same day.
She rolled out of bed and peeled off her day-before clothes. She nearly gasped aloud when she remembered she’d left her panties behind. Memories of her night with Jax surfaced and threatened to slow her but she shoved them aside and hurried to the shower. When she was toweling off, something caught her attention in the mirror. She leaned in closely to focus on the reddish-brown blemish on her neck.
“A hickey.” Marissa slapped her hand to her mouth. After thirty-four years she’d gotten her first-ever hickey. From the captain of her high school football team—now the chief of the Oak Hollow police department—no less. A giggle threatened to burble up to the surface and she snorted through her closed fingers.
She hurried out to her dresser and grabbed one of her Sweets by Marissa tees. She pulled it on over her head, then sagged with a sigh of relief. The clothing covered up the love bite. She finished dressing and went to the kitchen to find Hill already at the table. He sat with a bowl of cereal in front of him.
“Oh hey,” he said around a mouthful of marshmallow cereal. He swallowed and waved to the table. “I, uh, I helped myself.” He sounded apologetic.
“Good. I’m glad you did.” Marissa tucked the tag of his shirt in as she walked to the fridge to hunt for something. But unless Jax was inside it, she didn’t think she’d find anything suitable. She banished the wayward thought from her mind. “Hill, I know that you don’t trust easily and you have no reason to believe me.” She closed the fridge and turned to the teen. “I want to help you. I am helping you. You are welcome to anything I can give you. If a roof over your head and food is the least I can do, please accept it and don’t get all weirded out. ’Kay?”
A sad smile tipped the corner of his mouth. “If my dad met you, he’d call you a bleeding heart. Then try to con you out of anything he could get.” Hill shook his head. “Some people are born to be parents, like you and my mom, and some should be sterilized the moment they can conceive.”
Marissa couldn’t help herself—she leaned over Hill and kissed the top of his head. “Every parent should have a kid like you.” She patted his shoulder when he nodded and then dug back into the marshmallow cereal.
“Sorry, no more mushy. How are you feeling this morning?” She grabbed the box and pulled out a handful of the cereal.
“Fine.” He glanced at the pristine white bandage covering his lower left arm. He lifted the bowl and drained the last dregs of milk before standing and moving to the sink. “I can do a little work before school to make up for yesterday.”
“If you feel up to it.” She dusted the crumbs from her hand. “I should be ready to go in ten minutes.”
Hill nodded and rinsed out his bowl.
As Marissa hurried back to her room to finish her hair she all but kicked herself for not letting Hill come back to her house sooner. He needed a bed, not a sofa, to sleep on. He needed breakfast. And routine.
They rode in silence to the shop. As she pulled up to the back door a thought popped into her head. “Do you know how to drive?”
He looked down. “No.”
“Would you like me to teach you?”
Hill paused in unbuckling his seat belt. “Why?”
“You need to learn how. Everyone should know how to drive.”
“Why would you do that for me?” He shook his head and got out of the SUV.
He broke her heart. At what point would he stop getting up after being beaten down? So far, Hill had showed remarkable resilience, but could there be a point when he would just lie down and let the world roll right over him? God, she hoped not. And she was determined to do all she could to make sure it didn’t happen.
Hill helped her set up before he had to head off for school. They fell into the rhythm they’d established since he started working for him. He got the huge bins of flour prepped for the morning baking while she get the two large coffee makers going. Then Hill went into the freezer and did a quick inventory. The morning work went smoothly and efficiently. She couldn’t quite remember how she’d managed before he’d been there. It surely had been lonelier.
Just before he took off for school, she tried once again to talk him into one more day at home to rest, but he’d hear none of it.
Hill left just before the store opened. Marissa had taken a few moments after he’d gone to get on her computer and look up what it would take for her to become Hill’s guardian. Legally. That was assuming he’d even want her to.
But whether it was her frazzled brain or just lack of knowledge on what to do, she’d had a hell of a time finding out anything. After nearly an hour of Google searches, she made a mental note to get in touch with a lawyer and maybe get it straightened out that way.
After she’d shut down her computer, though, nothing had gone smoothly. She’d burned the first batch of cupcakes, not paying attention to setting the timer—something she hadn’t done in years. Then she’d burned her hand when the oven mitt slipped and she caught her wrist on the oven rack. Now she was sporting a new burn, sleep-deprived and a tad more than grouchy.
She was about to give up and call it a day when the bell over her door jingled. Her sister Marlie, all decked out in a fuchsia form-fitting suit and cream lacy shirt strolled to the counter. “Hey ya. You look like—”
“Don’t you dare say it.” She must be eons behind on her beauty sleep. Every person she’d come across recently told her how terrible she looked.
“Sorry.” Marlie wrinkled her nose. “Burn something?”
“Some cupcakes this morning.” She hadn’t told her sister—or anyone in her family—about the fire outside the shop. “Whatchya doing here?”
“I came to go over the schedule with you.”
“Schedule?”
“For Callie’s bridal shower. And wedding.”
Marissa stared goggle-eyed at her sister for a long moment. “Come again?”
“You agreed to help me.”
“With preparations. I came to the meeting and I am baking over six dozen cupcakes on short notice.” The oven dinged as if to prove her point. She’d been baking nonstop to get the quantity she needed for the shop, Callie’s wedding and the birthday party. Several times she’d cursed the missed opportunity to get the extra oven she’d been tempted to buy. But the back of the shop had limited space as it was. The extra appliance would have more than likely required a renovation to enlarge the back. That meant code-compliance meetings and more money than she was willing to shell out.
Marlie followed Marissa to the back. “You agreed to help. I didn’t specify what that meant.” She stuck out her lip in a pout as she had when they were young. It held just about as much weight.
Marissa stuck out her tongue in response. Then on a sigh she asked, “What do you need me to do?” It was futile not to give in to Marlie. She always had and always would.
Marlie went over the Saturday festivities, of course to be held at the country club.
“Are you sure Bunny will let me back in? The last time I was there with her she turned a few shades of green.” She pulled the cupcakes from the oven and set them on the cooling rack. She waved to the coffee maker to see if her sister was interested.
Marlie shook her head. “If Callie doesn’t mind, Bunny will keep her mouth shut. They have some weird power struggle going on right now.”
“Who’s winning?” The sisters walked back to the front of the store.
Marlie pulled another sheet of paper from her leather folder. “I’d say Callie, but I would never underestimate Bunny.” She shrugged. “So, for the wedding. It’s a week from Saturday. Do you have a dress?” Marlie glanced down at the sheet.
Marissa rolled her eyes. “I have at least one.” She leaned on the counter across from her sister and screwed up her face with a little bit of resentment that her sister didn’t think she could dress appropriately.
Marlie looked up a little confused. “No, sorry. Do you have a baby-blue dress? That’s what color the reception hall will be draped with. And we have to match—to blend in as unseen as possible. That was one thing that Bunny insisted on. Put her foot down and apparently threatened to pull funding for the whole shebang otherwise.”
“Funding? A wedding needs funding?”
Marlie gave a quick snort. “You don’t want to see the budget. You could open another shop. Or two, for what this is costing.” Marlie slid a sheet of paper across the counter. “Here’s a timeline for you. I really do appreciate you helping me with all this. With the Carlisle/Johnson wedding on my resume, I’ll be able to book bigger weddings.” Her eyes sparkled. Marlie had always loved planning parties. When she’d been engaged, she’d taken care of all the wedding planning.
Unfortunately her fiancé had died in a horrific car accident only three days before the ceremony. Marissa has worried about her sister, but she’d pulled through, though she hadn’t found—or tried to find—another man, but she’d managed to get on with her life.
“And Saturday, please wear something dressy and preferably pastel. It’s not formal, but you know how things go at the country club.” She tucked her leather folder into her briefcase. “Any questions?”
“How’d I let you talk me into this?”
“Because you love me and I’m your favorite sister.”
“You’re my only sister, brat.” Marissa walked around the counter and gave her twin a big bear hug. “I do love you.” She was once again reminded that despite the worries she and Marlie had had growing up, they’d had it a million times easier than Hill had. And even when there were bad times, she’d had Marlie to lean on.
“I love you, too.” Marlie gave her a quick squeeze. “What brought this on?”
Marissa needed to tell one of the Llewellyns what was going on in her life. She’d never kept a secret this big from her family. She opened her mouth to tell her sister, when the cell at her hip rang.
Marlie held up a slim finger. “This is Marlie.” She listened for a moment. “What do you mean the flowers are all wilted?” She dug through her bag and found a small red organizer. She tucked the phone at the crook of her neck as she pawed through the small book. “They didn’t have back-up generators? Gaw.” She found the page she was looking for and stuck her thumb in to hold the spot. She glanced over at her sister. “I have to handle this. You’ll call me if you need anything?” She didn’t wait for an answer, but turned and headed back out of the shop talking a mile a minute, making plans.
Marissa’s shoulders sagged. She made a mental note to call her dad after work. It’d been far too long since they’d had one of their heart-to-hearts. She could unload about Hill and if she was particularly brave she might even tell him about Jax.
Jax. She rubbed her hand over her face. What would he think when he woke to find her gone in the morning? If it had happened to her, she’d be hurt, angry. She’d run the gamut of “Why aren’t I enough to make you stay the night?”