Kayla had the weirdest dream. She’d been drinking blood from Ryder and had actually enjoyed it. Her body stirred with desire as she opened her eyes. It was dark, and she had a mattress under her.
Odd.
Hadn’t she last been in the back seat of the SUV? Had they reached their destination? She started to sit up when strong arms circled her and pulled her back.
“You need to rest.”
Ryder. She would know his scent anywhere. For some reason he smelled really, really good. Not that he hadn’t before, but damn she wanted to lick him like a popsicle.
“Where are we?” Her vision adjusted, and she took in the small room with new eyes. A dresser with a flat screen on top sat across from them. Ryder was stretched out next to her, but this was definitely not her room or even his. This one was different.
“A small motel outside the city,” he said.
“Why did we stop here?” Again, she tried to sit up, but he stopped her.
“You needed to rest. Everyone required a break after the fight with the rogues.”
Ah, now it was coming back to her. Gunfire and bullets flying everywhere, and then searing pain in her stomach. She’d been shot? Her hand flew to where the wound should have been but there was nothing there.
“I was shot. Right?”
“Yes.” He’d rolled to his side and propped himself on his elbow. How was it she could make him out as if there were a light on in the room? Something was different.
“But…” She looked down and lifted her shirt enough to see her stomach. “There’s nothing there.”
His gaze dropped to her naked torso and heat drove a spike into her. “You’ve healed.”
“Vague much?” She noticed a burning sensation on the back of her right wrist, so she rubbed it. “What happened to my… Oh my God! Why do I have a tattoo just like yours on my wrist?”
Ryder bolted upright. “Let me see!” He grabbed her wrist and turned it over. “Son of a bitch.”
A feeling of unease came over her. “What did you do?” The marking nearly matched the one Ryder had, minus the figure eight, the symbol of immortality.
“Gave you my blood.”
Her brain tried to process the information, but couldn’t wrap around it. “I don’t get what you mean.”
Ryder looked at her as if she were daft. “I bit my wrist, opened your mouth and… Well, I’d say I forced you to drink but you did so freely.”
She wanted to hurl. It hadn’t been a dream then.
“How could you? That’s gross!” Realization struck her over the head with a hammer. “Oh you bastard! Am I like you now?”
“I have no idea, but that is not how I normally sire vampires so I highly doubt it. I only know you were close to dying, and Logan suggested I give you my blood.” He swung his legs over the side of the bed and strode away. Suddenly the curtains were pulled open.
“Who’s Logan?” She shielded her eyes until they adjusted.
“Lucifer’s son.”
“What?” She pinched the bridge of her nose to subdue the headache that was threatening. “I can’t believe you would listen to… Wait, how did this Logan end up giving you life-saving suggestions?” Apparently, she had missed quiet a bit while out cold.
Ryder launched into a story about the Angel of Death showing up with Logan to collect all the demons they could find. He filled in all the empty gaps of how the rogue came to be and some bullshit about fate. She looked at her wrist and rubbed her thumb over the black lines that formed a heart. Maybe if she rubbed hard enough, it would go away.
“How did you sire the others?” She realized she had no idea how Ryder created his vampire clan.
“Ace was the first. I drank from him until his heart was one beat away from stopping, then I fed him my blood. He recovered in a few days.” He stared out the window. “My second one had to be locked in a cell for a month before he was able to fight his blood lust. I quickly learned the stronger the male, the better and faster they acclimated.” He looked back at her. “How do you feel?”
She glared at him. “Betrayed.”
He scowled. “Alive might be a good place to start.”
“You could have let me die.” She didn’t really mean it since it would be breaking the vow she had made to her father. Kayla was also a fighter, but she needed to lash out and Ryder was close at hand.
The hard lines on his face softened. “That wasn’t an option. You have no idea what it was like to feel you dying.”
“Y-you could feel it?” she whispered.
He looked down at his own marking. “Whatever this connection is between us, it was ripping me up inside. I would have done anything to save you. I can’t let you go, Kayla. Not now, not ever.”
The hard-nosed Ryder had a soft spot for her? His words were more than a man who wanted to take her to his bed. They held something else, and it scared her even more. “What happens now? And why do you suppose mine is only a heart?”
He lowered himself into a chair by the door. “I have no idea. Ashley seems to think we should allow fate to run its course. It’s how the strong will survive. As far as the missing part of your mark, maybe our bond isn’t complete but only started. There must be another step to the process.”
She could well guess what the next step was. “So, our freedom to choose who we want to be with has been taken away from us?” Tears stung her eyes. She would not crumble. Would not allow this new world to break her.
“I’m sorry, Kayla. I never wanted to tie you to me like this.” He scrubbed a hand through his hair. “I swear, I will control my urges for you. I’ll even find another way to feed so you don’t have to do it.”
She hated the thought of him with another woman even if it was for his nourishment. Sex? She wanted it so damn bad that her mood was foul. However, she wasn’t ready to be completely bonded to Ryder. There was a lot to consider and a shitload of questions. “We promised each other there would be no one else. Tell me about your urges.” Did they match her own?
He leaned forward. “I want to taste every inch of you, Kayla. I want your desire on my tongue while your body shudders in orgasm.”
She fought a shiver while cursing herself for asking. “And?”
“I want to slip between your silky thighs and rub my erection into your folds, making you beg for me to enter you.”
God, he was going to be the end of her. She barely hung on by a thread.
Kayla’s desire filled the room and nearly snuffed out Ryder’s last breath. He didn’t care. Was too caught up in her and the release she needed.
“You suffer. Take off your jeans.” He was surprised when she didn’t balk but did as he asked. Evidence of her arousal soaked through the red silk of her panties.
“No sex though.”
He knew she had come to the same realization as he. If they consummated this relationship, it would complete their bonding. “I promise I’ll stay fully clothed. Now, take off your panties. I want to see your pink flesh.”
Again, she followed his directive. Even laid back on the bed and spread her thighs for him to gain a magnificent view.
Fuck! This was going to take more willpower than he might have.
“Show me how you like to be touched, love.”
When her fingers glided through her folds, he hissed and gripped the arms of the chair to keep from rising and going to her. He was desperate to taste her but knew if he did that would be the end of his willpower.
“Imagine it’s me touching you. My tongue working along your sensitive flesh. Licking every inch of you.”
She moaned as she inserted two fingers inside her sex and worked them in and out.
“That’s it, come for me. I want to hear what you sound like when you let go.”
Her breathing quickened as she worked her fingers faster. “Ryder.” Seconds later she arched her back, her body quivering from the orgasm that took hold of her.
Ryder gripped the arms of his chair so hard they cracked under the pressure. He scarcely believed she had called his name in the throes of her passion. So desperate he was to take her––knowing she would not stop him––he leaped to his feet and slipped out the door. Kayla was vulnerable right now and taking advantage of that would only serve to wedge distance between them. She would grow to despise him for taking all of her choices away. Fate may have decided to bring them together, but he had furthered that bond by giving her his blood. However, there was one thing he could do, and that was to give her the choice to be with him or not. He would cut off his hands before he’d touch her without her consent.
He took in a sharp breath and willed the erection that pressed painfully against his zipper to deflate. Jaden walked by and thankfully jerked him back to the tasks at hand.
“Keep guard on this room and when Kayla emerges have her ride on the bus with the others.” Leaving her with Jaden went against every instinct he possessed, but it had to be done. Luckily, they had found an abandoned school bus and were able to replace one of their trucks, which had taken some damage in the cross-fire back in the city.
“You riding in the bus?” Jaden asked, surprised.
“No.” He walked away before he changed his mind. Kayla would need distance from him so she didn’t feel pressured. It was the least he could do for her after locking them together. Maybe the markings would eventually fade, and she would be free to choose the man she wanted to claim as her own. A stabbing pain in his heart indicated he hated the idea, but he would do anything to make her happy. Damn the fates that had caused this female to get under his skin and apparently into his heart.
Kayla’s orgasm had been unlike any she’d ever experienced. It had definitely been a long time of pent-up frustration. Taking carnal pleasure was at the bottom of the priority list when so many other things were going on. She had expected Ryder to strip and join her in bed. Was desperate for him to touch her and take away the ache deep inside her. Instead, she had heard the soft click of the door, and when she’d sat up, he was gone.
“He left?”
She quickly gathered her underwear and jeans, pulling them on. Walking to the bathroom, she found a bottle of water and splashed some on her face. As she toweled off, she stared at her reflection. There were no visible differences, but there was something altered inside her. The rumble of voices reached her from outside the door, but she couldn’t make out the words. Ryder was likely speaking with one of his men. She tried not to allow hurt to overtake her. If he didn’t want her, then she should be thankful. He’d done her a favor by leaving because if he’d stayed she would have begged him to take her. Kayla begged for nothing, especially if it came from the vampire who had placed the mark on her wrist. She glanced down at it and studied the black lines. Ran her finger over the swirls of the heart. It was a beautiful mark, yet she found herself disappointed that it was missing a critical piece. She closed her eyes and searched for a link to Ryder. His presence blanketed her as if he stood right behind her, yet she wasn’t able to reach his mind. Instead she encountered a brick wall. He’d shut himself off to her. Another indication he didn’t want her any more than she wanted him.
Opening her eyes, she looked back at herself. “Except I do want him.” She would be an absolute fool not to at least admit it to herself. Whatever this connection was between them, it filled every pore of her body. Made her ache with a desire only he could sate. Kayla knew he experienced it too because she had sensed his desire for her. Yet it wasn’t only physical. There was a sense of friendship as well. Kayla knew she could tell Ryder anything, and he would understand her. The sensation left her both full and empty. As if she had gained something but at the same time lost it, and it was unsettling.
Why did he leave? Because you told him no sex. What about his needs, you dimwit?
Right, she was being impractical. Tossing the towel, she exited the bathroom. No matter what was on the other side of the door, she would face it head-on. If what Ryder had said was true, and she had almost died? Then she was grateful to him for saving her and in exchange would cherish the gift of life. She had survived the Red Death and now a bullet. Apparently, she had a purpose. What it was, Kayla would have to figure out as she went. Flinging open the door, she was greeted by a pink morning sky and Jaden.
“Glad to see you alive.” Had he actually grinned? The vampire didn’t smile much. He glanced at her arm. The one that held her mark but didn’t comment on it.
“If you’re ready, Ryder wants to get going.”
“As ready as I can be.” Maybe that was the reason Ryder had left her. It made sense that they needed to get back on the road. It was only about a four-hour drive from the city so they couldn’t be that far away. It stood to reason they should get there and secure the site right away. After what happened back in the city, it was evident they needed to be some place safer. Hopefully, this Site R was it.
Kayla followed Jaden, and when he stopped at a school bus, she was confused. “When did we procure this?”
“While you were out. We lost a truck in the fight and another broke down. This has more room.”
She eyed the people on board, staring out the windows at her. “Ryder is riding on a bus?” She had a difficult time picturing that.
“No, he’s riding in the SUV, but he ordered you on the bus with the others.”
She hoped the shock and disappointment didn’t show on her face. “I see.” Without another word, she climbed the three steps and found a vacant seat. Tara was nowhere to be seen. Likely she was with Gordy in the SUV. So why had Ryder separated himself from Kayla?
Because he doesn’t want you.
He had been forced to make a sacrifice and give his blood to save her life. In the end, he hadn’t wanted to be with her any more than she had wanted him. Words he had uttered to her earlier now felt meaningless.
Then why does it feel like my heart just shattered into a million pieces?