CHAPTER 4

Amanda got barely a wink of sleep all night. One minute she was convinced she’d made the only decision that had any merit, but the next, the absurdity of considering such a monumental undertaking assaulted her. She couldn’t even pray. Despite numerous attempts, the words refused to come out right. It seemed folly to expect the Lord to bless their venture, when the wagon master himself pointed out how lacking she and Sarah were in many of the basic and necessary travel skills.

Heaven only knew exactly what they might encounter ahead. Swollen rivers, swift and deep from spring rains, trouble with the wagon, possible injuries to herself or Sarah. And what about wild animals that freely roamed the open country? Or Indians? Amanda’s stomach knotted just imagining the two of them alone in the wilderness, no one knowing or caring where they were. But on the other hand, she reminded herself, the Bible did say that God was all-knowing, so nothing would take Him by surprise. The Almighty, in His omnipotent wisdom, had surely known that Pa would pass on to his eternal reward and leave them to fend for themselves. The Lord must have a place for them out west. He would be with them. He would take away all their fears. Grasping that conviction, she closed her heavy eyelids and finally dozed off.

A pair of distant gunshots echoed a few hours later, awakening Amanda with a start. Sarah, next to her in bed, was still breathing in the slow, regular pattern of deep slumber. Amanda, her head aching from the lack of sleep, raised the coverlet and slid out of bed, then padded to the window.

The first pale streaks of dawn were beginning to stain the dark sky in the east. Turning her head in the opposite direction, Amanda spotted the golden lantern glow rising from the conglomeration of wagons amassed in the rocky-outcropped meadow near the spring on the edge of town. Everyone had anxiously awaited those signal shots over several unbearably long weeks. She could imagine the people milling about, hitching teams, readying their wagons. What suppressed excitement there must be, what cheerful chatter, bright hope, and sheer happiness. Last-minute preparations before setting out for a new life.

She heaved a sigh. What she would give to be part of that exhilarated throng about to depart for Oregon.

Brisk morning air ruffled over Amanda’s bare arms, and she shivered. Hugging herself, she retreated to the warm sanctuary of the bed while her plan reaffirmed itself. No telling how long it would take that whole wagon train along with the vast herd of cattle and livestock to depart Independence. But once a sufficient span of time passed to allow the emigrants to put some distance between themselves and the town, she and Sarah would leave, too.

That settled, Amanda again relaxed, and her eyes fluttered closed.

“Mandy?”

Sarah’s voice seemed fuzzy and far away, but the gentle hand shaking Amanda’s shoulder felt very real. She raised her lashes. How could it be this bright already? Only a minute ago it was still dark.

“We’ll miss breakfast if we don’t hurry.”

She bolted upright, noting that her sister was fully dressed. “Oh! I must have overslept! Sorry.”

“I left water in the basin for you.”

“Thanks.” Amanda rose and dashed across the room to wash up. The cool liquid she splashed on her face felt refreshing, and she was surprisingly rested after that last unexpected snatch of sleep. After blotting her hands and face on a towel, she shimmied out of her night shift and into her chemise, then reached for the sturdy burgundy calico dress laid out the evening before.

Sarah moved up behind her and helped with the buttons. “Are we, you know… still going?”

Amanda peered over her shoulder. Her sister’s brow bore uncharacteristic lines of worry. “Of course. Why wouldn’t we?”

“I just wanted to make sure.”

“But we’d best not let anyone know. If we so much as let a single word slip, good-intentioned people are sure to stop us. We’ll bide our time, wait until we can leave unnoticed.”

“Right.” Finished with the buttons, Sarah nibbled her bottom lip with unconcealed excitement. “I’ve packed our things.”

“Splendid!” Amanda smiled and sat down to pull on her stockings, then jammed her feet into her hightop shoes and used the buttonhook to fasten them. After some quick strokes with the brush she tied her long hair at the nape of her neck with a black velvet ribbon and stood up. “Do I look presentable?”

Sarah nodded.

“Well, what are we waiting for?” Sputtering into a giggle, she hugged her younger sibling. Arm in arm, they headed downstairs to the dining room, reaching it even as a handful of other patrons were taking their leave.

Mrs. Clark, the middle-aged widow who provided hearty meals at the Bradford Hotel, greeted them as they entered the now-empty room. Her apple-dumpling cheeks rounded with her smile. “We wondered where you two were this morning,” she said pleasantly, a hand on her wide hip.

“Everything smells luscious,” Amanda said, averting her attention from the gray-haired cook to the long table. She resisted the impulse to offer an explanation for their tardiness.

“You missed all the goin’s on,” the older woman announced. “The train pulled out first thing this morning.”

“Oh, really?” Feigning nonchalance, Amanda exchanged a cursory glance with Sarah. “It certainly seems like a perfect day to begin a journey.”

“Yep, that it does. Pity you two couldn’t be among them. Well, set yourselves down in one of them clean spots, and I’ll bring you some flapjacks and eggs right quick.”

The remainder of the morning seemed interminable to Amanda and Sarah as they peered constantly out the window, checking the immense, distant trace of dust stirred up by wagons and cattle. Finally they gathered their belongings and stole down to the livery to tuck their bags unobtrusively into the wagon.

The two of them heaved down the heavy chest containing their father’s woodworking equipment and lugged it to Cavanaugh’s Mercantile. Amanda had to bite her tongue at the pathetic sum the storekeeper offered for the finely crafted tools, but there was no recourse but to accept. She and Sarah ignored his questions as they casually perused the bolts of material he had on hand and chose several different kinds they thought would prove most useful for their new enterprise.

In midafternoon, on the pretense of wanting to get current with all their affairs, Amanda settled their hotel bill, and the girls checked their room one last time to be sure they hadn’t forgotten anything. No doubt they’d miss the comfort of that big four-poster soon enough, Amanda surmised. But she eagerly anticipated some solitude after the constant racket of this rowdy frontier town.

“There’s no sign of dust above the trail now,” Sarah Jane mused, closing the window. “Do you think it’s time?”

Amanda subdued the butterflies fluttering about in her stomach and gave a solemn nod. “It’s now or never. But first we must say good-bye to Pa. It’s only right.”

With the emigrant train gone from Independence, the diminished noise level outside seemed all the more apparent in the stillness of the grassy knoll just beyond the simple white church on the far edge of the settlement. Amanda and Sarah treaded softly over the spongy ground.

A soft, fresh breeze whispered among the scattered wooden crosses bearing the names and life years of the dear departed. It gently billowed the girls’ skirts as they stood gazing down at the forlorn rectangle of mounded earth beneath which Pa lay awaiting the heavenly trumpet call.

Amanda felt a lump forming in her throat, but swallowed hard and sank to her knees to place a bouquet of wildflowers on the grave. It took every ounce of strength she could muster to force a smile. “Pa, Sarah and I’ve come to say good-bye now,” she said, her voice wavering slightly. She drew a deep breath. “We’re setting off for Oregon, just like you planned, so this will be the last time we can visit you. Tell Mama… we send our love. Farewell.”

Beside her, Sarah Jane sniffed and brushed tears from her cheeks. “We’ll keep you and Ma in our hearts… until we’re all together again. We—we love you. Good-bye… for now.” After a few moments of silence they met each other’s eyes and stood. “We’ll have an early supper, then head over to the livery and watch for Mr. Plummer to go have his,” Amanda announced.

The blacksmith was busy shoeing one of a pair of workhorses when they peeked around the edge of the doorway after their meal. But finally he exited his shop and walked over to Martha’s Eatery. The door of the restaurant closed behind him.

“That is it.” Amanda led the way around back of the livery, where they sneaked inside. Ever grateful that Pa had made her practice hitching up the mules and driving them, she located the required equipment belonging to them and followed her father’s instructions to the letter. Then she went to Mr. Plummer’s makeshift desk and left a packet containing sufficient funds to cover the expenses incurred from boarding and feeding the animals, along with a short note of thanks for his kindness.

Everything finally in readiness, they climbed aboard. Amanda released the brake, clucked her tongue, and slapped the traces against the backs of the mules. The heavy wagon lurched into motion, its huge wheels crunching over the gravelly dirt.

Without Pa, the cumbersome vehicle felt huge. Immense. And the mules seemed less than enthusiastic about having to work after weeks of being penned up and lazy. But Amanda gritted her teeth and held on, steering them around the sheltering grove of trees behind the livery and then guiding them in an arc that would soon intersect the trail to Oregon Territory.

Sarah leaned to peer around the arched canvas top at the busy river port they were leaving behind. “I don’t think anyone even noticed us drive off. Oh, this is so exciting, Mandy! We’re actually doing it… heading west, just like Pa dreamed. I can’t wait to start writing about it in my journal. I’m going to put down every single thing that happens along the way!” Gripping the edge of the hard wooden seat, she filled her lungs and smiled, staring into the distance.

A person would have to be blind to miss the sparkle in the younger girl’s wondrous blue eyes, Amanda conceded. If it weren’t for the sobering knowledge that she herself was now in control of both their destinies, she might have shared some of her sibling’s lilting optimism. But right now her hands were full. Returning her attention to the long trail stretching beyond the horizon, she put her full concentration on the hard job ahead.

The road west, impossible to miss, already bore deep ruts from vast hoards of wagons that had made the journey in previous years. Amanda filled her gaze with the absolutely breathtaking landscape all around them. Groves of budding trees dotted the gently rolling ground, itself a wondrous carpet of long, silky grasses. Myriad flowers speckled the spring green in a rainbow of glorious hues. Surely in such a delightful season of new life, nothing could spoil their adventure. To make certain, Amanda lofted yet another fervent prayer heavenward, beseeching the Lord to bless and protect them on the journey.

“I wonder when we’ll reach Oregon,” Sarah mused.

“Papa expected it to take months. But according to that guidebook he purchased back home, it’s a fairly pleasant drive, even if it is rather long.”

“Why would Mr. Holloway try to scare us off, then?”

At the mention of the wagon master’s name, Amanda tightened her lips, forcing aside an exaggerated mental picture of his obnoxious smirk and insinuating eyes. “He’s just a pompous beast, is all. But he isn’t going to stop us now, Sissy. And neither is anybody else. We are on our way west!”

And Seth Holloway will never even know it.