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Chapter Eight

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Emerson

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HE’S LIKE A FREAKING celebrity or something. I stand off to the side of the room as the crowd swarms around Colt. My chest aches and my lungs tighten. He hates the attention, but it’s part of being the best shooting guard at FU in the last ten years. The reason for them winning the championship. So, he sucks it up, shakes some hands, laughs at some terrible jokes, flirts with the fluffle-heads, all while keeping me in his sights.

I’m still on edge after the ice-cream shoppe incident, but I try to push those thoughts and feelings aside. They have me riled up and unsettled. I’m not sure how to deal with them. Can’t deny I felt some spark of longing, a craving for something. Imagining Colt kissing me there sends tingles through my body. It might help me overcome my fear of the opposite sex.

It’s not too different than my idea of getting Colt to shove his tongue down my throat. Except he’d be putting his tongue somewhere else. I clench my thighs and swallow.

It’s crazy. I’m being crazy.

Friends don’t kiss friends. He told me so himself. By that token, friends sure as hell don’t go down on each other.

Colt moves through the crowd, angling his body so he can see me. It’s no secret I hate these parties, more so when he gets dragged away from me, because I worry for him, and me. I’m wary of everyone around us. One eye on me the entire time, he keeps his arm slung over a ball, securing it to his hip. I attempt to bring my breathing under control. He’s a few feet away, not far. He’s calm, and I’m okay hiding in the corner, rubbing at the pain in my chest.

If he can’t keep me close, then the ball becomes his comfort. No one would dare knock the ball out of his hands. Me on the other hand, I’m easy to shove aside, to push out the way to get closer to the man. To Colton James. I’m expendable, replaceable. I’m no one to everyone, but he’s everything to me.

I’m not sure when the panic attacks started, sometime after we came to FU. I’d had them before, growing up, but it wasn’t until we came here that they intensified, became stronger, harder, more gripping. I tried to play them off as nothing, but Colt knew. He’d witnessed them many times, saw how they drained me. How they suck all my energy, all my motivation.

He’s the only one who can bring me out of an attack.

He narrows his gaze on me, his eyes dropping from my face to the hand pressed in the center of my chest. I drop my fists to my sides and flash him a smile. Reassuring both him and me it’s nothing serious. I’m okay without him by my side for ten minutes.

Codependency is a real bitch.

The crease between his brows smooths out and he lifts his chin, a half-smile on his face as he acknowledges I’m okay.

Rome saunters over then and throws his arm around Colt’s shoulder, whispering something in his ear. Colt stiffens, his gaze locking on mine, his jaw tense. Rome follows his line of sight and perks up when his eyes catch mine. I try to slink back further into the shadows, but I hit a wall.

A lean wall. It’s warm, firm, yet soft. Hot breath floats across the back of my neck and I shiver.

“Hey.” The voice is low, a whisper in my ear but I recognize the husky tone.

Austin.

I step forward and turn side-on to face him, preferring him in my sight than lurking behind me.

“Hey.” I smile and feign innocence, still edging farther away. Colt wasn’t supposed to tell me about this bet with Rome. “Having a good night?”

It’s a friendly question, right? It’s not leading, not hinting at anything more. There’s no hidden meaning behind those words. Austin can’t read anything into them.

“I am now you’re here.” He leans against the wall beside me, propping himself up on his elbow and blocking my view of the party, of Colt. His jeans hug his muscular thighs, and his plain white t-shirt rides up, exposing his tanned defined abs.

I refrain from rolling my eyes. These are the moves everyone says Austin is famous for? My panties aren’t melting, and they sure as hell aren’t falling at my feet in a wet mess.

I lift my gaze and stare up into his eyes, his smile. It’s cute, the slight gap in his teeth, the dimple on his left cheek—my chastity belt springs another padlock, ensuring no one is getting in there. A good thing too with how my traitorous body reacted to Colt’s touch earlier.

Six months.

Piece of cake. These moves do nothing for me. The flirty smiles and cheesy words, while enthralling, mean nothing. To hold my interest for longer than a fleeting glance, a guy has to have substance, challenge me, make me laugh, talk to me, respect me. Earn. My. Trust.

Trust doesn’t come free.

I don’t hand it to everyone I meet. It’s too fragile, too important, too easy to lose, to break, to take for granted.

“Does that work?” I ask, raising an eyebrow.

“What?” He reaches out and pinches a tendril of my red hair between his fingers and twirls it.

“Stupid lines like that? ‘I am now you’re here. Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Are you tired because you’ve been running through my mind all day?’” I mimic his voice and he throws his head back and laughs.

The sound is deep, throaty, and free.

“Honestly?”

I nod.

“I’ve never used them.”

“I don’t believe you.” I search his eyes, looking for any hint of a lie but I find none. Hmm. Maybe he’s telling the truth. It’s not wise to believe everything you hear, particularly gossip.

“It’s true.” He glances over his shoulder, and Rome hollers at him. Cheering him on, encouraging him to make a move.

I lean to the side so I can glance around Austin’s giant frame and get a glimpse of Colt. There’s a girl standing in front him, sipping on a fruity cocktail, touching his arm, pressing against him, but his eyes are on me, searching mine for reassurance, so I give him a small nod.

He relaxes for half a second and then turns a murderous gaze to Austin. Colt’s body stiffens and his jaw tightens. The message is clear even if Austin is facing me and not Colt. “Back off.”

I might regret it later, but Austin isn’t intimidating me or pressuring me or doing anything to scare me off. Yet.

“Sorry about him,” Austin says, jerking his thumb over his shoulder at Rome.

I shrug. It’s not like I haven’t been around the team at these sorts of parties before. Rome’s the instigator.

“There is a reason I came over here though, and it wasn’t to give you cheesy pickup lines.”

“Oh yeah?” I say, trying to keep calm but also planning my escape route should he crank up the douche-meter.

“To tell you, I heard about the bet between Rome and Colt.”

My mouth drops open. “And?”

“And, Rome can get fucked.”

“What?” I gasp, not expecting that response.

“He’s a dick, and I wanted to tell you I’m not trying to get in your pants. Not now. Not next week and sure as hell not in the next six months.”

My face falls, and my stomach is heavy. I swallow, but my throat is dry, and it hurts. His admission shouldn’t disappoint me, but it does. It’s stupid because I don’t want to sleep with him, but hearing him admitting he doesn’t want to sleep with me either, hurts a girl’s self-esteem.

He must catch the hurt on my face or something because he reaches for my arm. “No, shit. Sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. Damn it. I’m sorry, Emerson. Can I start again?” he rambles, scrambling to make it right.

I’m not sure I want to listen to anything more he has to say but I give him the benefit of the doubt and nod.

“I mean, Rome’s a dick. He shouldn’t have made the bet with Colt, and I’m pissed with Colt, too, for making a bet about his best friend.” Austin smiles at me, and I kind of like it. He’s pissed at Colt for using me to make some money. I should be angrier with Colt than I am, too, but I’m not because we need the money. I don’t tell Austin that though, because it’s none of his business. “I came over to say that I won’t try anything because I’m hung up on someone else.”

I smile in relief.

“Rome knows it, too, and he’s being a...”

“Dick,” I offer when he trails off.

Austin laughs. “Yeah, he’s trying to force my hand. Get me to make a move I’m not ready to make yet. Does that make sense?”

“Perfect sense.”

Austin is crushing on someone. He has real feelings; they’re strong and likely too deep for most of this crowd to comprehend. He’s in love with someone but he won’t admit it yet.

“Can I ask you something?” I’m curious to learn more about the girl who has Austin St. Clair tied up in knots. Why, if he’s renowned for being a smooth talker and ladies’ man, he doesn’t unleash his charm on her?

“Sure.” He shrugs.

“Why don’t you want to make a move? What’s holding you back?”

“Because she doesn’t know I exist.”

“You’re in love with her,” I say, and he nods in response though I wasn’t asking.

“Always have been.” He clears his throat.

“Always?”

“When I say she doesn’t know I exist, I mean in a way other than a friend. We grew up together, but she’s not into basketball, or parties or anything. She doesn’t fit in with this crowd. She’s smart though. Like, super smart. Her head is always in a book, she’s always studying or reading. She’s shy and keeps to herself. I don’t want to tell her I want more because I’d rather have her as my friend than scare her off and lose her forever.”

Oh, my heart. It flutters hard in my ribcage and I swoon a little. But damn, I hope one day I find someone that loves me like that.

“Why is Rome so set on pushing you into something you’re not ready for?”

“He likes to stir shit, cause trouble. He’s a rich little prick who gets entertainment from other people’s suffering. He was probably hoping this bet would cause a rift between you and Colt, too.”

“Why?”

“Why not? Other people’s misery is the perfect entertainment.”

What a jerk.

I don’t know much about Rome, but from what I do know, this doesn’t surprise me at all.

“Wanna mess with him a little?” I say before my brain can process my thoughts.

“What?” Austin chews the corner of his lip.

“Rome deserves a little of his own medicine,” I muse, glancing around Austin again and over at Rome and Colt.

I’m not impressed Colt put me in this position, but I’m willing to forgive him if the cash he wins saves his dad some money. But he’s always pulling stupid stunts and I let him get away with it each time because it’s who he is. Now though, he’s dragged Austin into it, and I kind of want to mess with them a bit.

Austin’s brown eyes sparkle, and he brushes a lock of black hair out of his face. “What did you have in mind?”

“I don’t know yet. Make Rome think he will win, and Colt think he will lose. He thinks you have no chance with me.”

Austin arches one eyebrow. “Really?”

“You don’t, no offense. But that’s why he took the bet. He knew it was a sure thing. So screwing with him will be hard, and I doubt he’ll believe it, but it’s worth a shot.”

“But Rome?”

I grin up at Austin. “We knock him down a peg or two. Make him believe he will win and rip it away from him at the last moment.”

Austin grins. “You’re evil. I like it.”

I peer over at Rome and Colt and bite back a smile. Rome is standing tall, proud, his chest puffed out full of confidence that he will win. Colt’s glare is hard, as though he’s imagining a thousand ways to kill Austin.

He’ll do everything he can to ensure I don’t sleep with Austin and lose him two thousand dollars. He should know me better than that though. Like I’d risk that much money. Not when I owe his dad everything.

“Now, ask me for my phone number and watch all hell break loose.” I chew on my bottom lip, wondering if I’m making the right decision, but before I can change my mind, Austin does as I say and pulls out his phone.

This is probably the worst idea in the world. How can I be sure if Austin is trustworthy? What if this is all part of his master plan to get me into bed? But then, I think about the way he spoke about her, the girl he’s loved his entire life and I know he’s being truthful with me.

“Can I have your number?” he asks, shifting to the side so he can hand me his phone, ensuring both Colt and Rome see.

“Sure.” I take his phone from his hand and type in my number before calling myself so I have his number. Then I hand him back his phone.

“So, what now?” He tucks his hands into his pockets and rocks on his heels.

“Wait for it.” I tap my hand on his chest, knowing what’s coming next.