TO MY GOD IN HIS SICKNESS

        A boy is as old as the stars

        that will not answer

        as old as the last snows

        that blacken his hands

        though he wakes at 3

        and goes to the window

        where the crooked fence is blessed

        and the long Packard

        and the bicycle wheel

        though he walk the streets

        warm in the halo of his breath

        and is blessed over and over

        he will waken in the slow dawn

        he will call his uncles out

        from the sad bars of Irish statesmen

        all the old secret reds

        who pledge in the park

        and raise drinks

        and remember Spain

        Though he honor the tree

        the sierra of snow

        the stream that died years ago

        though he honor his breakfast

        the water in his glass

        the bear in his belly

        though he honor all crawling

        and winged things

        the man in his glory

        the woman in her salt

        though he savor the cup of filth

        though he savor Lake Erie

        savor the rain burning down

        on Gary, Detroit, Wheeling

        though my grandmother argues

        the first cause of night

        and the kitchen cantor mumbles his names

        still the grave will sleep

        I came this way before

        my road ran by your house

        crowded with elbows of mist

        and pots banging to be filled

        my coat was the colors of rain

        and six gray sparrows sang

        on the branches of my grave

  2.   A rabbit snared in a fence of pain

        screams and screams

        I waken, a child again

        and answer

        I answer my father

        hauling his stone up the last few breaths

        I answer Moses bumbling before you

        the cat circling three times

        before she stretches out and yawns

        the mole gagged on fresh leaves

        In Folsom, Jaroubi, alone before dawn

        remembers the long legs of a boy

        his own once and now his son’s

        Billy Ray holds my hand to his heart

        in the black and white still photograph

        of the exercise yard

        in the long shadows of the rifle towers

        we say goodbye forever

        Later, at dusk the hills

        across the dry riverbed

        hold the last light

        long after it’s gone

        and glow like breath

        I wake

        and it’s not a dream

        I see the long coast of the continent

        writhing in sleep

        this America we thought we dreamed

        falling away flake by flake

        into the sea

        and the sea blackening and burning

        I see a man curled up, the size of an egg

        I see a woman hidden in a carburetor

        a child reduced to one word

        crushed under an airmail stamp

        or a cigarette

        Can the hands rebuild the rocks

        can the tongue make air or water

        can the blood flow back

        into the twigs of the child

        can the clouds take back their deaths

  3.   First light of morning

        it is the world again

        the domed hills across the gorge

        take the air slowly

        the day will be hot and long

        Jimmy Ray, Gordon, Jaroubi

        all the prisoners have been awake

        for hours remembering

        I walk through the dense brush

        down to the river

        that descended all night from snow

        small stones worn away

        old words, lost truths

        ground to their essential nonsense

        I lift you in my hand

        and inhale, the odor of light

        out of darkness, substance out of air

        of blood before it reddens and runs

        When I first knew you

        I was a friend to the ox and walked

        with Absalom and raised my hand

        against my hand

        and died for want of you

        and turned to stone and air and water

        the answer to my father’s tears