Jane wasn’t looking forward to dinner with Abigail and Marcy. Not if it was going to be anything like dinner with the twins. Marcy was closer to Matt’s age, so Jane was certain that she was going to be the more suited between the two of them.
Sadie hadn’t mentioned the two women for the entire day, not even when they were cooking for them. It was as though she was deliberately and completely trying to put them out of her mind.
For dinner, Sadie had chosen to make cabbage rolls and bologna sausage. Everything was made from scratch. For starters they’d have a traditional and hearty chicken corn soup with fresh-baked buttermilk biscuits. Dessert was to be shoo fly pies.
It was good to learn from such an experienced cook, the recipes passed down from Sadie’s own great grandmother. If nothing else, Jane was learning some new recipes while she was here, as well as some interesting variations for old ones.
It wasn’t long before Jane’s mind traveled to a familiar negative place. What good were recipes if there was no one to cook for? No Matt to cook for, more precisely.
Jane set the table for four, trying to convince herself that the dinner mightn’t be that bad. At least she might find out why Matt was interested in someone as young as Abigail. Perhaps she had a startling personality to go along with her youthful good looks.
“That's them,” Sadie said in an excited voice—the first excitement Jane had heard today—as she removed her work apron.
Sadie hurried from the kitchen while Jane stood straightening the last fork on the set table and hoping the night wouldn't be too awful. While she was listening to the voices coming in the front door, she realized she’d already made up her mind. Out of the two, she'd assumed Marcy was most suitable simply based on age. That wasn't fair, she decided. She would clear her mind of biases due to age and do her best to give each woman an equal chance.
When she saw the sausages were sizzling too much on the stove, she turned off the gas, took the pan off the burner, and then headed out to greet the girls.
They each met her with a smile and a kiss on the cheek.
“Are we ready for dinner now, Jane?” asked Sadie as if Jane had done all the cooking.
“We are, if everyone would like to take their seats.”
“We’re a little late, and I'm sorry,” Abigail told them as they headed into the dining room just off from the kitchen.
“That was my fault,” said Marcy. “I'm always late, but I'm trying to improve.”
Sadie smiled kindly. “We all have our faults. All we can do is try to better ourselves.”
Although Sadie was being kind, Jane couldn't stop herself from taking a very different approach. Marcy was tardy. She knew that Matt was a very organized man. Would he cope well with a wife who was often late? Probably not.
When the two guests were seated, Jane and Sadie brought the food from the kitchen and placed it in the center of the table.
“Oh my, this looks good,” Abigail said.
“It certainly does.”
“Denke. It was a joint effort, but all Sadie’s recipes.”
Sadie smiled at Jane and then they closed their eyes and each said their silent prayer of thanks for the food.
Abigail opened her eyes.
Marcy giggled. “Denke, for cooking us a lovely meal.”
“You haven’t tasted it yet,” said Sadie as Jane passed the bowls of food around.
“I hear you're a very good cook, Abigail,” said Sadie.
Abigail giggled. “Where did you hear that from? My mudder, I guess.”
“That's right.
“Mamm thinks I'm good at everything. I’m just average.”
“Your mudder told me you got first prize at the shul open-exhibition day for your cooking. And again at the fair last year.”
A smile beamed on Abigail’s face. “That was for cherry pie. Anyway, you're embarrassing me.”
Marcy looked at Jane, “When was the last time you saw Matt, not counting this visit?”
“I haven't seen him for quite a few years. Since I left here, I guess. We’ve kept in touch through our letters.”
“He often talks about you.” Abigail seemed to hint at more than her words alone conveyed.
“Does he?” Jane’s eyebrows rose. She wanted to hear more. Why would Matt have mentioned her to Abigail?
“He talks about you all the time.”
“I didn't know.”
“Do you talk about him also?” Abigail fluttered her lashes innocently, but Jane knew the question itself wasn’t quite so innocent.
“To be honest, I don't think I do. That's probably because no one at my community knows him. So there probably wouldn't be much point talking about him because they wouldn't know who I was talking about.”
Jane smiled on the outside, but on the inside she wished Matt had never given her the ridiculous task of finding him a wife.
“Oh this food is delicious,” Abigail commented once more.
The girls were trying to be on their best behavior. It was just a simple meal of bologna and cabbage rolls.
“It's all just simple food,” Sadie commented, saying exactly what Jane was thinking.
“What brings you here, Jane?” Abigail asked.
Jane coughed. She couldn't tell them why she was there. “I thought it was time to visit old friends. As I just said, I haven't been back since I left years ago. It was time.”
“And do you have a boyfriend or anything?” asked Marcy.
Jane stared at Marcy. It was the kind of question she thought Abigail might ask.
“Kind of,” Jane said offering an embarrassed laugh to cover the awkwardness gnawing at her tummy.
“A ‘kind of’ boyfriend? That sounds interesting.”
“Not really. It's a developing relationship. I've known him for quite some time.” Jane shrugged her shoulders. “We'll just have to see what happens.”
“Tell us about him please,” asked Abigail.
“I think Jane wants to keep that to herself,” Sadie said.
“Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to pry. I'm just interested in that kind of thing. I'm interested how couples get together. It seems a complete mystery to me.”
“That's because you're still young,” Sadie told her.
Marcy smiled. “Well, when you find out let me know, will you? I’m still waiting for someone to fall in love with me.”
“Maybe someone already has fallen in love with you, Marcy, and you just don’t know it yet,” Abigail suggested.
“Maybe. I'll just be like Jane, I'll just wait and see.”
“Good idea.”
Jane didn't like where the conversation was going. She had to steer it away from love. “And what do you do for work, Marcy?”
“I work two days a week at my cousin’s cafe.”
“And I make candles that my cousin sells at the cafe,” said Abigail.
“It’s a mutual cousin,” explained Marcy, “since Abigail and I are cousins, too.”
“Oh, I love making candles,” said Jane. “I haven't done that for so long. I love putting the different fragrances and the oils in the melted wax before dipping the candles.”
“I'm making some tomorrow. Why don’t you come to my place and we can make some that you can take home with you?”
“Oh, I couldn't do that.”
“Why couldn't you?”
“I just couldn't.”
“Why don't you, Jane? I don't think you have anything planned with Matt tomorrow, do you?” asked Sadie.
She had been hoping to see Matt tomorrow, but now it didn't look like it was going to happen. And she would get to know Abigail a bit better and that was the purpose of her being there. “Sure, I'd love it. That's very kind of you, denke.”
“I can't wait. It’ll be fun.”
Over dinner, Jane was slowly changing her mind. Marcy didn’t seem any more mature than Abigail.
The conversation shifted back to Matt.
“So you've been spending a fair bit of time with Matt while you’ve been here, have you?” Marcy asked.
“Little bits and pieces.”
“They were best friends growing up,” Sadie told them. “They were always together. Two peas in a pod they were, except one being male and one being female. They were with each other every day until they were young teenagers.”
“What happened then?” asked Marcy.
Sadie ignored the question, and continued, “You see, they only lived half a mile away. Jane was always at my haus or he was at hers. If either of the two of them went missing, we always knew where they could be found.”
Jane had to smile. “Most of my childhood memories were the ones at your old place, out in the fields or on the rocks near the river. We had such fun.”
“Sounds like you were very close,” said Marcy.
“It wonders me you didn't marry him,” Abigail added.
“They might have,” said Sadie. “Only the elders suggested they were too close when they were in their early teens. They thought it was unhealthy that they were spending so much time with one another.”
“Oh, that's sad. And so unnecessary sounding.” Abigail put her fingertips to her mouth. “Oh, I didn't mean to sound like I was speaking out against the oversight.”
“Nee,” Marcy said. “It just sounded like you were stating your opinion, am I right?” Marcy stared at Jane and Sadie.
“That's what it sounded like to me,” Sadie agreed, while Jane nodded.
“So, Jane, who became your best friend to replace Matt, all those years ago?”
“Jessica. Jessica who is now married to one of Matt’s brothers.”
“She’s now my dochder-in-law.”
“Jah, we know Jessica.”
Abigail said, “I didn't know she was a good friend of yours, Jane. I remember you in the community when I was a young girl, but then you must've left.”
“That's right.” Jane was starting to feel very much every one of her thirty-one years.
“I remember when you left. Everyone was a little startled, but they said you moved back to where your family was originally from.”
“That's right. My extended family are back there, but my two siblings who are older than me both left the community soon after our parents died.”
“Oh dear! I'm sorry to hear that,” said Abigail.
“Yeah, me too,” added Marcy. “How did your parents die?”
“I can't remember,” said Abigail, “but I recall it was sudden and they died one soon after the other.”
“Ach, I’m sure Jane—”
“It’s okay, Sadie. I don’t mind talking about it. My vadder went first from pneumonia, and six months later my mother from an aneurysm. I think it was her way of being with him. They were always together, always holding hands when they sat together. We used to giggle about that when we were younger. We saw no other married couple doing that. They only did it inside the haus though.”
“Jane’s bruder and schweschder soon left the community because they said Gott didn’t save their parents from dying young. They were stripped of their faith,” Sadie told them.
“I can understand them thinking that way, but they have to know that God might have wanted them home early.”
“I don’t think words like that gave them much comfort.” Jane said. “They had one good talk with the bishop and the elders, but that didn't stop them from leaving. I haven't heard from them since.” Jane felt tears stinging behind her eyes. In a way it hurt more than her parents dying because her parents didn't have a choice in leaving her. Her brother and sister had the opportunity of making a choice and they had both just turned their backs on her and the community. Jane cleared her throat and willed the tears not to fall. On this visit, she was getting good at hiding her emotions.
That night after everyone had left and Jane was in bed, she couldn’t stop crying as painful memories surfaced. She’d been left alone in their house when her brother and sister left the community. She was only seventeen, and they were nineteen and twenty. She’d gone from having a family of five, to being utterly alone in six short months. The pain and isolation she’d felt back then was like nothing else.