Hi, my name is Andy (moan).
Q Who am I?
A Andy (I just told you that!).
This is my friend Terry (groan).
We live in a tree (moan, groan).
Q What did the rock say when it rolled into the tree?
A Nothing—rocks don’t talk.
Well, when I say ‘tree’, I mean treehouse. And when I say ‘treehouse’, I don’t just mean any old treehouse—I mean a 104-storey treehouse! (It used to be a 91-storey treehouse, but we’ve added another 13 storeys.)
Q Which side of a tree has the most leaves?
A The outside.
So what are you waiting for?
Come on up!
Q How did the idiot get hurt raking leaves?
A He fell out of the tree.
It’s got a stupid-hat level,
Q Where does Dracula keep his money?
A In a blood bank.
a money-making machine (that also makes honey),
a never-ending staircase,
Q How do shells get around in the ocean?
A Taxi-crabs.
a Two-Dollar Shop (there’s nothing over two dollars),
a Two-Million-Dollar Shop (there’s nothing under two million dollars),
Q Why did the boy fall off his bike?
A Because his mother threw a fridge at him.
a refrigerator-throwing range (with a refrigerator-vending machine so we never run out of refrigerators),
a bunfighting level (with a bun-vending machine so we never run out of buns),
Q How can you say ‘rabbit’ without using the letter R?
A Bunny.
Mount Everest,
Q What was the tallest mountain in the world before Mount Everest was discovered?
A Mount Everest, of course.
a burp bank,
a tangled-up level (where everything is really, REALLY tangled up),
Q What do snakes do after a fight?
A They hiss and make up.
a deep-thoughts thinking room,
Q What is pink and can think?
A A brain.
a mighty fortress reinforced with extra-strong fortress reinforcer,
and a beautiful sunny meadow full of buttercups, butterflies and bluebirds.
Q Where do butterflies sleep?
A On cater-pillows.
As well as being our home (moan), the treehouse is also where we make books together. I write the words and Terry draws the pictures.
Q Why did the fly fall off the wall?
A Because it had a piano tied to its leg.
As you can see (groan), we’ve been doing this for quite a while now.
There are, of course, a lot of distractions in a 104-storey treehouse (moan)...
Q What’s grey?
A A melted penguin.
but somehow we always get our book written in the end (groan).
Q Why did the boy throw his clock out the window?
A Because he wanted to see time fly.