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Chapter Twelve

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MILO:

BREAKFAST WASN’T AS BAD as he thought it would be. He knew Leo watched, despite claiming to give them space. Everyone else—the Xeno Sapiens and humans alike—all took him and Cassie in stride, despite the fact she was rarely from his side and gripped his hand tight enough to make a grown man wince. But they were also careful—aware they were never truly alone with a sentient computer personality with access to the entire building. After breakfast he couldn’t wait to get outside to where the sunlight shone—and to where he knew Leo had no eyes. But he refused to make it obvious. He sure the hell didn’t want to always run from a computer presence in the modern world where it was unavoidable. He just had to ease in gently, so he took her out into the main hub where waiting benches were placed around the large, circular room. In this main section, there was a glass ceiling that enabled natural light. Huge trees had been planted in terrariums in the room and it felt peaceful and natural even though they weren’t actually outside.

“Was it weird?” he asked, pulling her onto a bench.

“It was weird. And he wasn’t even present, which means it’s totally our own issues. Not his.”

“But our issues were created by him,” he growled. He hated when she defended Leo, afraid she felt for Landon instead.

“Yes, they were,” she agreed, surprising him. Maybe she wasn’t always jumping to defend him like he assumed. He tried to change the subject.

“These benches are made by the twins, Jett and Brax. I’ll take you out into the woods where they have a gazebo made entirely of wood.”

She didn’t let the subject go. “It’s time for us to take those emotions back, Milo. Let’s forget Dr. FrankenLeo’s creation ever existed. Let’s focus on where we might be if he’d never interrupted.”

“If we’d be a couple right now?”

She nodded shyly. “Yes. You know I was attracted to you when I met you.”

“Are you still?”

“Yes. I showered with you this morning. I slept in your bed last night.”

“We slept as friends and you didn’t participate in a morning orgasm, cupcake.”

“It was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen,” she admitted.

“Then what stopped you?”

“Honestly—I worried that you might think I was just replacing my feelings for Landon by using you.”

“Fuck, Cassie. If you need to do that, do it. Use me if it makes you feel better.”

“I can’t use you! What kind of a person does that make me?”

“A person who is going to know I love her and I want to do anything that makes her happy. I felt it the first time I saw you enter the main hut of Xenia. I knew from studying the information on the bride program that you wouldn’t feel it as swiftly but I thought you were beginning to the first day.”

Her heart pounded. Did he say the L word? Or did he mean he would love her in the future? She wasn’t sure, so she tried to keep it casual. “I wasn’t sure what it was. I thought it was going to be more of a wallop—but while I was drunk, I second-guessed myself. What if I was so desperate for the feelings to hit, I was telling myself I felt them? And then when Landon came along—there was the push that set everything else aside.”

“Except that push wasn’t natural. That push was concentrated using my own pheromones.”

“It made me think I had created the feelings for you. I cut them down immediately because I didn’t want to lead you on. To hurt you. And I didn’t want to be disloyal to Landon, who we now know didn’t even exist.”

“Thank you,” he said.

“For what?”

“Your honesty. It clears so much up. I know without a doubt you were meant to be mine but I can wait patiently while you nurture those feelings.”

“We’ll always be truthful and honest with each other.”

“Yes, we will,” he agreed.

“Right here—right now, with all this beautiful nature around us, I’d love to have our first real kiss.”

He groaned. “You’re killing me, Cassie. Good or bad, I promise to always be honest, too.”

She searched his eyes and ran her hands up his abs. Damn, her touch felt amazing. She didn’t stop until her open palms rested on his chest. Slowly, Milo leaned down, his lips aligned near hers, but hesitated right before he touched her. He gave her the option of backing out in case this was too soon. Hell, real person or not, her love for Landon had been. One more second, and he pressed his lips gently to hers.

They held just like that for a couple moments, mostly because he fought against groaning. Despite his morning orgasm, he was just as turned on as when he’d woken up with her silky thighs open to him as her legs twisted with his. This was it, he finally had her. Him, not Landon. She parted her lips for him and let him brush his tongue inside her mouth. She was delicious and felt right, like his. He promised honesty, but he couldn’t say so, not after she thought Landon had been the one. Not yet, anyway. She needed time to adapt. But he’d always known she was his. He concentrated on taking his time and kissing her thoroughly. He didn’t want her to push him away with his wanton urges, but he sure as hell didn’t want the kiss to end, either. So he was patient and giving.

He thought his heart would stop when she moaned softly. Each time he stroked his tongue against hers, she relaxed a little more against him, and their bodies melded together. He could feel her chest move against his as she breathed.  Only then did it dawn on him that her magnificent breasts were mashed against his chest.

Holy hell.

She’d pressed herself close enough to him that there was nothing but the thumping of their hearts through their clothing.

Cassie kissed him once, twice, nipped his lip, and then stunned him when she slipped her arms around his neck and tightened her lock.

His heart pounded in his chest. Could she feel it against hers? Did she feel the same way? Or did she compare his kiss to Landon’s?

That thought alone was enough to make him freeze.

She pulled away.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, her eyes somewhat dazed.

“I—uh, well, I just—” He couldn’t seem to spit it out.

“Truth and honesty between us, remember?” she asked softly.

He took a deep breath. “I wondered if you compared the kiss to you and Landon.”

She looked horrified. “No! Milo, no. I didn’t. She dropped her arms. “God, this is so awkward.”

He sank his forehead to hers. “Let’s just work through it, Cass. Those were your words.”

She was so close he could smell the sweetness of her breath. Honey. “Okay,” she said. “Think of our first day when we met. How we clicked, even though I was tipsy as hell.”

“Drunk as a skunk,” he agreed. “And I wanted you so bad. But I didn’t want you to know because if you made a move on me, I wouldn’t be able to turn you down. And it felt like I was taking advantage of you being drunk.”

“I wanted you, too,” she whispered.

“Yeah?”

“So bad. I used being drunk as an excuse to touch you.”

“Yes.” He felt his lips turn up at the corners. “My veins.”

“Veiny biceps, veiny...everything. I wanted to touch everything.”

The breathless catch in her voice let him know exactly what “everything” she referred to. Just the thought of her thinking of the veins that lined his cock had him hardening again. Somehow their mouths melded together again and their tongues were back to where they left off. Stroking. Teasing. Giving each other mindless pleasure.

He regretted asking to check their compatibility while they were out in the open like this. Because with the way they sparked, the compatibility testing might have landed them in his bed. But they weren’t anywhere near it.

He pulled away after a series of small, pecking kisses. “I think it’s safe to say the compatibility is still there.”

“Definitely it’s still there,” an overhead voice said. “I’m grateful to see the serum that picked up my enhanced pheromones didn’t ruin Cassie for you.”

Milo froze. “Leo, get the hell out of here.”

The computer voice sounded hurt. “But I’m helping you two.”

“Don’t help.” Milo’s voice was clipped. “Why do you think we locked you from our apartment? We would never have needed your help if you had never interfered. We don’t need more interference to make it right.”

“I am sorry. I am. I will give you privacy if that is what you wish. I just thought we had made a breakthrough.”

“And to make sure,” Milo snapped, standing up and pulling Cassie to her feet. “We’re going outside.”

He bundled her to the outside through an outer hall. He was aware of Leo’s silence as they walked down the hallway without a word between them, but couldn’t help but wonder if he watched and was quiet just to give them the illusion of privacy. If the damn computer even understood that privacy meant not just interfering and making his presence known but leaving the room entirely. And was that even possible for his autonomous presence to do? A small part of him worried that Leo tried but was against his own abilities. It angered him that he worried over the backstabbing traitor.

When they were on the steps of the front entrance, he said, “He ruined our first kiss. I should have known we couldn’t trust him.”

To his surprise, Cassie slipped her hand into his. “He didn’t ruin it, Milo,” she said softly. “Nothing could have ruined that. As far as first kisses go, I’m still tingling.”

He stopped and turned to her. He wanted to cling to the idea that Leo ruined everything, but it was harder to find the reasoning. “He interfered again.”

“He’s feeling human emotion and he’s not used to it. Those feelings he wanted to turn off by returning to the computer status have snuck in without him realizing. He wants so desperately to make things better for us.”

“I’m afraid he might tempt you again somehow,” he admitted.

“No. Not now that I know the truth. The only one that tempts me is you.”

She pulled his head down to her for another kiss, a tender, sweet one. Just like that, his mood lifted again. Then she reminded him, “Leo was your best friend.”

He snorted. “A computer as a best friend.” It sounded pathetic and in the past he would have defended that Leo was more than just a computer. He was artificial intelligence. He had grown into a person, despite not being embodied.

“Yes. A computer that didn’t know right from wrong.”

“He almost ruined us.”

“And I’m not saying I forgive him. It’s a little bit easier for me to pretend that Leo isn’t Landon and I’m mad at Landon. But you need to forgive yourself for being his friend. You resent that friendship. And it’s okay to like him. You need to forgive him to forgive yourself. Hell, who knows? Someday you might want him to be best man at our wedding.”

He sucked in a gulp of air. All he heard was wedding. “Do you think we might marry the human way, then?”

“I thought it might be nice,” she said shyly. “If we decided to be a couple instead of just signing a contract to raise our child together. What do you think?”

“I would love it.” He swept her up in his arms then, loving her giggles as he twirled her around. There was so much to do. He’d have to get into the spare office and research with Leo all about human weddings.

Leo.

Fuck.

Leo was not his friend. Leo was a fucking computer that couldn’t be trusted.

For the first time, a spark of sadness covered the flare of anger that normally hit at the thought of his ex-best friend.

He couldn’t ask Leo for help researching. He could ask him to stay out of the office and hope Leo honored his wishes. But damn if he didn’t miss having Leo there. Like he had been when they’d researched flying—and various types of animal wings—and even machines that flew. How he shared the excitement he could barely contain at the thought of the Bride Program. For the first time, he realized he had missed him. Maybe Cassie was right. He needed to work through his emotional mess.

“When I was at home—during the memorial, I asked Steele and Renegade to remove the house computer from my quarters. I should have consulted you.”

“I think that’s understandable,” she said.

“It made things harder for you. We can’t replicate anything.”

“So we’ll figure out how to boil water for tea. We figured out to allow him access while we’re gone to get laundry done.”

“But I should have consulted you. It’s your home, too.”

“Everyone is acting like I lost the love of my life. And yes, I guess I did. But you lost your best friend, Milo. We have to work through that, too.”

“I don’t like the idea that even if he gives us his word, he might be watching us.”

“That’s something we’re going to have to get over. It won’t be easy, but someday we’ll get there together.”

She squeezed his hand in hers.

“Together,” he echoed, a small smile spreading over his face. That was the key. He and Cassie could do it together.

And for the first time, he realized how lonely Leo must be. To lose his best friend, to try to deny the emotions that invaded his programming, and to not have a mate to navigate this new puzzle with.

For the first time, he could see past the anger enough to imagine forgiveness.

One day. Definitely not today.

For today he was content on taking a walk with his future mate, holding her hand as they strolled through the city. Because damn if Cassie hadn’t agreed they would be a couple.

“What are you thinking about?” she asked after they’d been walking a while.

“What a blessing my life is going to be. I thought it was over when you picked Landon. And then I thought it was over when I killed him. But just one morning together and you have me looking forward to beginning again. Not just because I’ll have a beautiful mate and children. You got me past enough of my anger to think that one day I can forgive Leo. You made me realize that all of that pent up rage is hurt because I lost my best friend. And I’m disappointed in myself because—hell, I could be a murderer. I’d have been tossed in prison right now if we lived outside those Xenia gates. I’m angry at Leo, but mostly I’m angry at myself.”

“I’m angry at myself, too, Milo. I know I was tricked by pheromones, but imagine how I feel—that I was so blissfully accepting of fake feelings that I almost bypassed my chance at what I’ve always wanted. I just needed to trust my own instincts instead of depending so much on that serum. And I know you want me to forgive myself, but I want you to forgive yourself, too. So here’s my promise to you, Milo. I understand you and accept you. Everything. Mistakes and emotions—ugly and beautiful, good and bad. I accept that we won’t always agree, but we can be honest with each other and explain why or why not. I accept that we might have more problems and it might take us a while, but we’ll fix them and move on. And most of all, I’ll be with you when you’re ready to deal with your issues with Leo and I’ll be honest about my issues with him.” Her voice had to choke past an emotional lump in her throat because she could see the rawness on his face as he thought about his friend. “I’ll be with you through thick and thin, Milo.”

Milo was breathing hard, his chest heaving with every breath as he fought to contain his emotion. He swallowed a few times. He ripped his gaze away from hers and focused on the outer streaks of vibrant colors that criss-crossed the skies. Other humans said the skies once had rainbows after the rains. Now the entire sky was one giant, painted canvas. A magical rainbow of heavy stroked, contrasting color. “I promise to give you a life to cherish. I’ll make sure you’re safe and happy. I’ll give you as many blue babies as you want. I’ll make sure no one ever comes between us again because our future family depends on it.” Milo’s wings spread out—still taped so rather ungracefully—at the same time his arms came out to pull her to him. Slowly his sore wings fluttered around them both, wrapping her in a cocoon of his love.  Milo swallowed hard. “I love you already. I always have. You don’t need to love me yet because I know you still have emotions swirling around in you. I just want to be honest enough for you to know how I feel.”

“I’ll be honest, too. I care for you so much, Milo. Is it love? I’m not sure because I don’t trust myself to know. Not anymore. I thought I loved Landon and I don’t want to blame or resent Leo any more than I already do. It’s going to take some time to understand what is real love and what isn’t. But what I do know is it makes me so very happy to be with you. It makes me happy to see you smile. It makes me happy when you touch me. It makes me happy that we’re so comfortable around each other. You just make me happy.”

“Because we’re mates,” he said, his voice deep. “You may not trust yourself to feel it yet, but I do. It’ll take time for you and I’ll be here the whole time.”

Under the protective cover of his wings, he dropped his head, rubbing his jaw against her hair, giving her time to decide. He felt like cheering when her hands tentatively snaked up his back. And then she lifted her face, turning her lips toward him for a kiss. With a groan, he took the temptation of her sweet lips. He kissed her, ravenous with desire even though he’d come in his own hand just this morning. She moaned softly and he kissed her again. And again. Eventually she placed his hand under her shirt on her stomach, right under her bra, then to her hip and back up. He smiled against her lips, knowing what she needed, as he kissed her.

“You regret not letting me make you come this morning?” he whispered, loving the adorable way her cheeks pinked.

“Yes,” she said shyly, knowing they’d promised to be truthful. “I was nervous at first. Wondering if you would think I was replacing Landon. But it’s you that I want to feel touching me. I promise.”

“How much touching do you want?”

“I’m ready for a little,” she whispered.

“I’ll be here for you, Cassie. I’ll feel you up, make you come. I’ll get you addicted to me. I know you aren’t ready for heavy emotion yet, but I’m yours whenever you want it.” Right there, out in the open but hidden from view by his wings, he cupped her sex, and she gasped at the intimate contact that felt so right between them. He kissed her with a wicked smile on his lips because all was fair in love and war. If he had to tempt his temptress, so be it. “You got needs, Cassie baby? I’ll take care of you whenever you like.” He pulled his hand from between her legs and cupped her cheeks with both hands, framing her face tenderly. “Your body’s fine, with or without the serum. I love that it wants me, so stop listening to your head. Your head knows your heart was shattered, and that’s why you don’t trust yourself. It wasn’t all Leo, it was me, too. I hurt you when I hurt Landon. So I got work to do on that before I push you for your love. Forgiveness and trust because when it comes down to it, your heart was shattered because I killed who you thought was your one true love. You understand I’m willing to do anything to make you whole?”

Stunned, she nodded and flattened her palms on his chest. She spread her fingers and licked her lips as if she wanted to speak.

“What is it, baby?” he gritted.

“I think,” she said on a breath, her beautiful brown eyes large and full of love for him she didn’t know she had, “I’d like to have a do-over of this morning. I really wish I would have helped you come. And I wish I would have taken you up on your offer.”

“Then, Cassie Richter, let me take care of the future mother of my child. My children. My brood of future wild-haired, winged girls.”

In one smooth move he lifted her against him, her legs around his hips and his wings fluttering back to lie still.

Then he began walking to their apartment, nuzzling her neck as she laughed.

Not once did he even think about Leo.