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Knox
I take Sarah-Jane back to the hotel room after what you could only describe as a major public fuck up. This shit will hit the news, that’s for sure. What a way to destroy her happiness. Out of all the hotels in New York, he had to be at this one! Doesn’t really surprise me, it’s stunning here. It’s what having money can get you, so why wouldn’t he bring his woman here? When we reach the room, she is still seething. I don’t blame her. Walking in, she drops her bag down on the floor and stalks off to the bedroom and throws her body down onto the bed. It sucks her in with a whoosh of covers and pillows. I laugh silently as she throws her arm up over her face. “Like what the hell was that,” she spits out, anger lacing her tone as a smile reaches my lips. I love it.
Straddling her, my weight pushes her deeper down into the bed and blankets. “You’re so freaking cute when you’re angry, Angel.”
Peeking up at me from under her eyelashes, she hits me with a, “Shut up. No, I’m not.”
Still laughing, I fall to her side, pulling her with me so her head is resting on my chest. Her legs snake out over my hips and crotch. The light movement of her legs grazing over me sets my dick on fire, wanting to pump into her again and again and never stop. “It will be ok. Just come here and rest a little. We have a while before we have to leave anyway, so sleep Angel. I’ll keep the monsters at bay. I won’t let him hurt you or us.” I pull her deeper into my embrace and try to take the hurt and pain away for her. “You have wanted to do this for so long and tonight we will, if you’re up for it, of course?” I say into her hair as I breathe her in, apples and rain, such a sweet smell, so intoxicating.
“Yes, of course. There’s no place I’d rather be than with you. Do I get a hint, baby?”
“Nah, Angel, you don’t!” She looks up at me, searching my eyes for clues. “Not going to happen, baby.” Pouting she gives in for now at least. I know she won’t let it rest for long so I enjoy this moment.
I sit with my back against the head of our four-poster bed, holding her tightly in my arms. “We don’t need words. We just need each other.”
She mumbles, “I love you,” against my shirt, her breath so warm as it kisses my skin.
“Ditto, Angel.”
She falls asleep on my chest not long after. I brush the hair back off her face and watch her sleep. I can’t believe that I get to do this forever; to just stare at her, watch her and love her. I’m so defenceless when it comes to her, weak but alive. She does things to me that no one could ever understand. I love the way her chest rises with each soft breath, the way the sun catches the streaks in her hair, the way the sun shimmers off her skin, and the way the moon lights up the wonder in her eyes. She has an aura around her that seems magical.
I get lost in her, thinking of tonight and the surprise I have planned; a movie in the park on rugs with a picnic, just like the ones Brad used to take her to. I can see just how much she misses him when she tells me about what it was like having him in her life and the things they used to get up to. I can’t ever begin to imagine the intense pain she carries because of losing him. I do know though, that if I lost Kash, I would be so fucked up! I’ll do whatever I can to keep the grey skies of that pain and loss out of her eyes and keep the sun shining around her. She is mine now and I’ll carry her.
There is a knock at the door. I slide her beautiful sleeping form from me, careful not to wake her as I go to answer it. It’ll be the hotel staff. I had asked the kitchen to do up a picnic basket of Sarah-Jane’s favourite food for tonight. I tip the young lady who has dropped it off and flick her a smile. I’m so happy; life’s good. I go to rouse sleeping beauty. We get ready and head out to the park; it’s a nice walk from the hotel. She won’t let up, wanting to know where we are going and what we are doing. “We’re having a picnic,” She rolls her eyes as I repeat the same thing I’ve said every time she’s asked in the last little while. God, I sort of love it when she rolls her eyes at me. It does things to me. She makes it hard to control my dick. That thing has a mind of his own at the moment. He has had a taste of her now and wants more, so much more. And we get to have this lady and her eye rolling forever. I smile at the thought of it as we walk along holding hands, the dove charm resting against the side of my hand.
We walk around the corner to where the park is. Central Park is the most beautiful place and she has always wanted to go there. It was by pure chance that I found the small part of this park offering an outdoor movie night this weekend, so I had snapped it up, knowing that it would top off the whole weekend and set in stone the perfect setting of our new life together. Noting the awe in her eyes as she finally sees what we are doing and where we are going is amazing. It’s all set up; people milling around, fairy lights strung from the trees, draping down into curtains that you can walk though. The big outdoor screen for the movie, big bean bags and a popcorn stand, an ice cream van, a drink stand and a neat, little coffee truck.
A small gasp slips from her lips and her hand squeezes around mine. She pinches the inside of my arm that she is holding. “Ouch, Angel,” I say. She looks at me with tears in her eyes.
“Really? You really found this for us?” she gasps at me, shock lacing her voice mixed with amazement.
“Well, you, yes. For you, Angel,” I say to her as we just stand there. She looks around mesmerized by the setting. She is speechless. I pull her along to find a place for us to sit. I find a good spot under a nice tree, lit up in tiny little fairy lights; it’s on a small rise so we have a great view of the movie and the people down around us. I throw out the rug and we sit down together. Placing a kiss on her hand, “You ok?” I ask, suddenly worried.
“Yes. Yes, I am more than ok. I can’t believe that you did all this and I didn’t even know about it! You are truly amazing. I need to pinch myself to make sure this isn’t a dream.” She says, shaking her head.
“Oh Angel, believe me, I’m the one who needs to pinch themselves. Everything I do with you is a dream. I think that, at any minute, I’ll wake up and you’ll be gone; that this will all disappear!” She launches herself at me and lays the most soul crushing kiss on my lips. My dick instantly stands to attention. I tisk it down under my breath. I feel a laugh bubble out of her tiny body. “Something funny, eh?” I ask, raising my eyebrow at her.
“You tutting at yourself is cute. It’s not your dick’s fault it likes me so much!” She winks at me and places her hand down on to the bulging form in my jeans. I suck in a deep breath. This woman makes it so hard to think straight. She starts running her fingers up and down the thickness and glides her nails up and down my back, which I suddenly realize she has gotten under my shirt without me even noticing. I bring my hands up to her face, hold her there and just look into her eyes.
“I want to make all your dreams come true, Angel. I want to give you the forever you deserve.” I lay a tender kiss on her forehead, then her nose before lingering there for a few seconds until I give in and devour her mouth, just as the movie starts. I scoot her around and place her between my legs with her back resting on my chest. She leans back so that her head sits on my collarbone.
I love the way she smells of apples and rain; it’s intoxicating. I wrap her up in my arms and burn this moment into my memory. We are watching old school movies, her favourite: Dirty Dancing. I can’t help but chuckle and smile as she sits there reciting it word for word, singing along to all the songs. As the air picks up around us, I pull her deeper into my hold and wrap her in the blanket, breathing her in. This lady has hold of my soul, my heart, my cock, my senses and now, my hopes and dreams. I will do all I can to love her the right way and give her all she has ever dreamt of. Fighting is the way to be able to provide her with a life fit for a queen. She is mine as long as I’m here and breathing and she’s standing by me, she will not want for anything. I can’t wait to marry her, wake up with her, go to sleep with her and watch her carry, not only my heart, hopes, dreams and secrets, but my children too, strong and beautiful just like her.
After the movie, we pack up and take the walk back to the hotel, taking our time and just enjoying being together laughing, joking and playfully teasing each other. Stopping over by the duck pond, we stand there. I’m watching her as she feeds the ducks what’s left of the French stick I had packed into the basket. “I can’t wait to get you back to the hotel room,” I say into her hair as I lean down and wrap my arm around her waist.
I pinch her ass, which looks delicious in her tight jeans tonight. She giggles in response, “Mmm, I can’t wait either,” she mumbles as I kiss her cheek, slowly bringing my lips down to graze over her neck, nipping at it as I go. Feeling the tiny goosebumps break out over her skin, I pull my phone from my jeans wanting to capture this and her forever. I snap a few shots of us both and then take just a few of her being silly, feeding the ducks, jumping on the park benches and hiding behind the trees. She truly is delightful. Picking up the basket, I pull her in under my arm and kiss her head.
“Let’s go, Angel,” I say as she pushes her hand into my back pocket and we walk out through the park towards the hotel. We turn back around the corner and take the path down to the lake that we need to walk around to get back to the hotel. Whispering into her ear just what I have instore for her when we get to our room, her body stills and tightens as her breath catches in her chest. I sense her unease and hope it isn’t from my crude comment. But then I notice her stare.
I look up to where her eyes are fixed and standing there, blocking our path, forming a sick circle around us, is Clarke and Dan, along with team jock! FOR FUCK’S SAKE, what do these cocks want? I pull Sarah-Jane close to me; she looks at me with nervous eyes. “It’s ok,” I whisper. “I got you, Angel.” I can feel her shaking under my fingers.
“You both look like a picture of sick happiness now, don’t you?” Dan says stepping closer to me as I pull my angel deeper into my hold, rubbing small circles over her back.
“What do you want boys? We’re just minding our own business, so if you don’t mind...” I say as I step forward. Stepping in closer on us it feels sick as they invade our space. “What is this? Back off, will you?” I spit out as I push out with my free hand.
“Ah, not so fast there, Knox. We told you that you would pay and tonight we seek payment.” He sneers out at me like he really thinks that this will be going down here in front of her without my boys.
I shake my head. This can’t be happening. “Well boys, so sorry to disappoint you all, but that won’t be happening now or in your near future, so if you just want to back the fuck up, and get out of our way, I wanna get my girl back to the hotel and to bed. It’s been a long day, and to be fucking honest, I ain’t in the mood for you dicks tonight! Come on, Angel, let’s go.” As I turn to go back where we came from I feel a hand on my shoulder as the jock squad on this side step forward. I spin round and say, “Don’t even think about it, Dan, I mean it. I really don’t wanna do this.” Looking into his eyes, anger starting to bounce off me mixed with the sparks of pure fuckin’ annoyance.
“Too fucking late,” Clarke spits out, “We wanna, we gonna, you ain’t got your boys now, do you?” he says as he steps up behind Dan. Fuck, here we go. I knew shit would happen.
“You put my jaw in wire for three goddamn months! So yeah, we’re going to do this now! I lost out on the whole fuckin’ football season and a scholarship to college because of you and them fucking fists of yours, you fuckin’ asshole!” Dan seethes out at me as I close my eyes. Great, this is all I need right now. Slipping my hand into my pocket, I try hard to hit speed dial on my phone to ring Jamie. I’m going to need him. I have a feeling this is going to be bad for all of us. I lift the pitch of my voice by an octave to emphasize the need for help. Hopefully it has worked and he can understand what’s going on.
“Hey, that’s all on you, friend. You should never have tried to fuck with her and I wouldn’t have had to do what I did. But you see, you pricks think being jocks gives you the right to do whatever the hell you want. Well, you’re wrong; you can’t. So, I stopped it and I wish I had got there sooner. And you know what? I don’t regret what I did. I’d do it again in a fucking heartbeat, count your lucky fucking stars that’s all you got!” I say through gritted teeth. This is starting to really piss me off.
“You fuckin’ took Tammy away; wasn’t this little bitch enough for you, huh?” Clarke says flicking Sarah-Jane between the eyes with his finger.
My blood boils as I pull her behind me and step right into his line of sight, “You fuckin’ touch her again and I’ll kill you! Oh, and mate? You lost her all on your own, buddy, when you jumped on the ‘Dan, let’s fuck the girls up’ bandwagon. We heard all your bleeding-heart pleas to Tammy already, friend. You’re fucking lucky that Tammy calmed Jamie down or he would have fucked you up, just like your little buddy over there! For a second time,” I laugh out. This is getting old, fast.
“Well you know what? Jamie and your little pack aren’t here now, and well, we are going to... Ah, what do you call it? Oh, yeah, we are going to ‘FUCK YOU UP!’”
Before I can reply, the air is smashed out of me from a punch to my gut. I curl over and breathe in deep to try and regain myself. I hear Sarah-Jane scream and catch a glimpse of her out the corner of my eye, coming to me before a hand flies up and grabs her by her hair, pulling back. A bloodcurdling scream fills the air. I fly up and launch towards her and the son of a cunt that has his slimy hands on her. “Let her go, you son of a bitch!” I snap out at him. “Now! Or it’ll be the last thing that your hands touch, EVER!”
Then I’m floored by a sucker punch. “What the fuck!” I come at Dan with my fists balled hard. “I’LL KILL YOU DAN! Back up and let her GO!”
“Not going to happen Knox. Grab him, boys.” He orders. I spin and whirl on them, fists flying as dirt from the ground is kicked up. Sarah-Jane’s sobs and pleas are all I can hear. When they pull me up, I see three of them holding me at bay and Dan and Clarke are on either side of my girl.
“Get away from her,” I bellow. There’s a guy to her back, one hand around her waist and the other holding a fistful of her long hair. I twist, kick, spit and fight to free myself from these little pissbags. “Can’t fight me one on one eh, Dan? Gotta bring the jock squad to help you, do you?”
Sarah-Jane is shaking and I can see the fear in her eyes. ‘Angel,’ I mouth to her. “It’s ok. I got this.”
She shakes her head at me, “Please,” she says to them. “Just let us go, just leave us be.”
“Oh, look boys, she doesn’t want to play today, do you darling? You little cocktease. You’ll get what you and your little friend Tammy have been gagging for since you got here. And sweetheart? I’m the one who’s going to give it to you. Tonight, after we fuck your boyfriend up, we’re going to make him watch as we all take a ride on that sweet little ass!” Dan slaps her face. The crack echoes out around us, fuelling my rage and kicking her anger into overdrive.
She twists violently and rips herself free. She kicks the cock-bag right in the nuts. You go, Angel! I can’t help but feel proud of her. “Run!” I demand. “Run!” I rip myself free from the jocks holding me, swing a punch to one of their jaws and then another to the nose of the guy coming at me and another to the fucker on my right. The cracks of my fist meeting their bone fill the air around us. I see Dan then. He’s going after Sarah-Jane.
He gets to her before I can as Clarke rounded on me. As I fly out at them, he and his friends grab me. Dan drags my girl back by her hair, tisking as he goes, “Silly, silly girl,” he is saying condescendingly.
Her eyes are bugging out of her head as he runs his hand down her front to her waist. He rests it there on her hip and grazes his teeth down her neck. “Please, please, please don’t,” she whimpers. My blood is boiling. I need to get to her, to help her and fuck this fuck-face up once and for all!
He comes around to just in front of me whilst Clarke and another guy hold Angel tight in place. The other three are on me. “What you going to do now, Knox? Your girl sure smells good. I wonder if she tastes as good. What you think boys? Should we have a taste of the delightful Miss Briggs?” he asks as his eyes burn into mine.
“You fuckin’ dare Dan, and I will hunt you down and torture you and kill you, fucking slowly! Your beef is with me, not her, so let’s just you and I settle this once and for all. You and I and our fists. Winner walks away with the girl. Loser? Well he stays a fuckbag. What do you say, son?” I bargain, looking him dead in the eye, not blinking or backing down at all. It’s a long shot, but worth playing to get him and these guys away from her.
“Knox, no!” she cries. “He’s not worth it, he can’t hurt me any more than they could by hurting you!” she says, pain and sadness lacing her sweet voice.
“Angel, it’s ok, I can take them.” I flick her a wink and a grin. ‘I got this, babe!” I say, looking into her eyes, trying with all I have to quell the panic in them. Just like that I hear him yell out.
“Take him, boys!”
“Wait, what? Get your fucking hands off me!” I yell as they rip at me, wrapping their arms around my body trying to hold me there still in one place. The scum bags! A crack to the jaw and a thud to my gut. I hunch over, my eyes watering and gut clenching with pain. I can hear my Angel sobbing. I take in a deep breath, square my shoulders and pull myself up and charge at Dan. I’ll kill him when I get my hands on him. “Come here,” I yell as he steps back.
I leap forward and grab him. I lay a few punches into his face and feel his jaw crack again. He’s giving as good as I’m giving him and I like that. I’m feeding it. The blood, the fear, the smell of the fight, it seeps into me, It’s like a drug. I can’t see right. My heart’s beating so fast I can hear the thud, thud in my ears. 1, 2, 3 thud 1, 2, 3 thud 1, 2, 3 smack, punch, kick... I’m going to inflict a world of pain on this son of a bitch! I feel a crack to the side of my head and stumble. I shake it off, leaping forward again, I get speared by one of the jock squad to the side of my body. We both go down hard. “Fuck!” My ribs! Damn! Dan is over by Sarah-Jane and Clarke is still holding her. She is crying and shaking. Fuck them, I have got to stop this now! “Get the fuck off her now, Clarke! You Dan, you’re dead, friend!” I jump up fists, knuckles white, sweat is forming and pure anger and rage are radiating off me.
He spins on me and slams into me. We tussle and turn, punch and claw. Sarah-Jane is screaming at us, begging us to, “Stop! Just stop!” I hear the plea and sadness in her voice; my heart’s breaking. I don’t want this to be happening; I don’t want her to see this, to see me lose my shit. I need to end it and take her home. I whirl at Dan and smack him square in his nose. I feel it break. He stumbles back, brings his hand up to the blood and looks at me, disgust in his eyes.
“Yeah jock, I just broke your fucking nose. How does that feel?” I spit out at him. Stalking forward, I’m taking him out with this one. I ball my fist and come at him with a haymaker; he sees me coming. My fist, with all my force and body weight, smacks right into the side of my baby girl’s head with an earth-shattering crack, as Clarke pushes her into my line of fire. I couldn’t hold back, I couldn’t stop or button off with the force of the hit. She falls to the ground in a heap of pure beauty, her hair fans out over her face as she falls. She hits the ground hard; her sweet head bouncing up off the ground and back down again so hard that it comes up slightly again before settling in the dirt. Falling hard to my knees beside her, I look up at them as I brush her hair away from her face. “You fuckin’ bastard!” I growl at him. “She’d better be ok!” Looking down, I see a trail of bright, crimson blood trickle from her nose, down her lip.
“Angel?” I plead, “Angel!” I scoop her up in my arms. Her body is so limp, an angry purple mark starts to spread out over the side of her face and temple, flowing down her neck. Shit, this is not good, this is bad, really fucking bad. The swelling is taking on a whole new life of its own. I run my hands over her face looking for anything, searching for any sign of her, of life. I look up at them all. “Get help!” I demand. “And believe me, she better be breathing!”
I look back down at her silent form and try to find a pulse. “Angel, Angel? God, someone help me!” Why?! What the hell? Panic sets in. I don’t know what to do, I just hold her and rock. “You’re ok. Breathe. Just breathe, Angel. Open your eyes. Come back. It’s ok. It’s over now. You’re ok. We are ok. Wake up, Angel. Please wake up. Don’t do this to me. Don’t do this to me. Don’t do this to me. I love you. Angel, please wake up.” I’m at a complete loss. “Jamie, Jamie I need you!” I cry out as I hear the sirens sounding out around us and look up as the jock squad run for it.
The ambulance officers fall down around us pushing me out the way, asking a million questions all at the same time. I’m lost, my head is spinning, all I know is I need them to fix her, to wake her up and make this better. They put her head into a neck brace, strapping it up so tight I have to ask if she can still breathe. They assure me that she can and to move back while they work on her, getting her ready to transport before rolling her onto her side and placing a board under her back. I cringe at the sight of it and her tiny body being taken from me. Holding her hand, not wanting to let her go, I walk beside her as they take her to the back of the waiting ambulance. A feeling of disgust washes over me as we enter the cold brightly lit ambo. Riding with her to the hospital; the ambulance journey takes what feels like an eternity. I never once let go of her hand.
When we get there, I can’t go past the trauma room doors. They tell me I’m not family. “But she’s my fiancée! Don’t you see? I need to be with her! She needs me, I need her...” I beg them but they just wheel her away. A lady reaches out for my arm. Ripping it free, I pace and panic, grabbing my phone from my pocket I dial Jamie. It rings and rings but he never picks up. His chirpy voice comes over in a voicemail message. I shout into the phone, “Where were you? Why didn’t you come? I fuckin’ hurt her! They made me snap!” I push it back into my pocket. I just stand there looking through the doors watching, waiting for anything, anyone, a sign, something! God, what’s going on? Is she ok? God, what have I done to my sweet Angel? I’ve hurt her beyond belief. She didn’t want me to do this. She didn’t want me to fight. I hear a voice behind me, it’s Sarah-Jane’s Mom, June. I turn to face her, tears, shame and anger washing over my face.
“Knox, what’s happened?” She asks me, her voice frantic and panicked. Pulling her hand out of her gloves to my face; the grazes, blood, cuts. I feel bruises forming already on my tight tear-stained skin.
“Huh? What? Um I... um I...” Shit, why can’t I find my words? “I don’t know, I just don’t know. I can’t think. I, um, we were, out; I took her out. We were walking back to the hotel. The jocks they, well, they started it. I had to finish it! They wouldn’t let her go, they were hurting her, taunting me.” I fall down to the ground, dropping my head in my hands as all the memories come flooding back to me, the taunts and cheap blows hit me as the tears fall and anger washes over me. My body gives up its hard exterior and I fall into the dark. Rocking back and forward, I just shake.
“Mrs. Briggs,” comes a voice from behind us. It’s a doctor, I think.
“Yes?” June responds. I don’t once look up. I just listen and rock.
“I’m Doctor Roe and I’ve been treating your daughter, Sarah-Jane. And this is?” I think she may be pointing at me.
“Oh, um, this is Knox. He is Sarah-Jane’s fiancé. He was with her tonight.” June tells the doctor, worry laced in her voice.
“Hi Knox,” she says to me kindly, stepping into the light in front of me. I can see the tips of her shoes, shiny and bright. My eyes land on her ever so sombre looking face. Once she sees me, the real me, the me I knew was in there deep somewhere, the judgement in her eyes shines through as she sees the blood and bruises. She holds out her hand to me.
Pulling myself up from the floor, I look at her hand and shake it, “Um, hi.” I say to her, walking over and sitting down on one of the cold plastic seats.
“You should be checked out too,” she says as she walks over with me and raises her gloved hand to my face, turning it towards the light.
Shaking her off, “I’m FINE!” I snap at her, “Where’s my Angel? Can I see her?”
“Can we see her? Is she ok? Where is she? I got a phone call saying my daughter had been hurt, and I needed to come in, ASAP.” June asks as she sits down next to me.
“I just want to let you know what’s going on at the moment. She’s having a few tests done and a scan of her brain, she has received extreme trauma to her head and neck. We won’t know the full extent of it until we get the results back. I’m very sorry, it’s not looking very good. I have to be honest with you here, Mrs. Briggs, and you too, Knox, you need to be prepared for an outcome you may not have envisioned coming in here tonight. There is coffee, tea etc. in the room just over there; feel free to help yourself and I’ll see you both again shortly. I will come and get you when she is up in the ICU and settled.” She takes June’s hand and gives it a slight squeeze. Like that makes any of this ok. Then with a swish of her white coat, she is gone.
I just sit there and stare at the double doors. Somewhere through them is my Angel, alone and I’m here doing nothing. I come out of my trance to June’s voice. “Are you talking to me?” I ask as I try to focus.
“What’s happened, Knox? What’s going on?” she’s panicking, tears staining her cheeks and she’s a shade of ghost white. Shit what have I done? I explain it all to her, right from the start to the horrible end. Tears are rolling down her face as I look up into her pain-laced eyes. “I’m so, so, so, so sorry. I don’t blame you if you hate me and don’t want me here,” I say to her, anxiously hoping that she won’t tell me to leave. She picks up my hand and pulls me into her arms.
“Knox, this is what sounds like a tragic accident and Sarah-Jane is strong and young. We will be ok, she won’t leave us. She won’t leave you. She will fight, you’ll see!” she is shaking, not meeting my eyes. I know she doesn’t believe what she is saying and neither do I. She’s fighting herself to not break and hate me right now. I sit and watch the hands of the clock go round, hour by hour, minute by minute, tick by painful tick, tock by achy tock. Why is this taking so fucking long? She has to be ok, she just has to be. We are meant to be; her and me.