E I G H T E E N
Our Divine Core
After working on the hara line and on intentionality with many people and seeing the big changes in their lives, with their life purpose opening up and fulfillment coming to them, I asked, “Who is it that is being fulfilled? Who is it that has this life purpose? Who is it that has all this intentionality? “ After all, our intentionality isn’t who we are. Clearly our personality isn’t who we are. It is only a signature expressing a bit of who we really are. Our physical body certainly isn’t who we are. Then who are we? Where are we? From where does all this life stem? Who am I?
I reasoned that there must be another deeper dimension beneath the haric level, a dimension that is the foundation for the haric level: the dimension of the knower. Heyoan was quick to respond to my curiosity:
Beneath the haric dimension lies the dimension of your deeper core. The core is the eternal “I am what is, was, and ever will be.” Here is the origin of your creative force. Your core is the internal source of the divine. With HSP, it looks like a star, a core star. This light is a signature of the eternal essence of each person. It exists outside of time, space, physical incarnation, and even the concept of the soul. It seems to be the source of life itself. It is the unique individual God within each of us. It is the source from which all incarnation stems, and yet it remains in complete peace and serenity. Where the core light emerges, it brings health. Where it is blocked, disease occurs.
So I was off on another adventure looking for the core, finding it, and learning to experience and work with it. Working with the core star has been extremely rewarding. In all healings that I give now, I work with all three levels at once. So travel with me now, as we enter into the world of your essence, the most holy of holies within you. I’m sure you will enjoy it.
The Core Star: The Eternal Source of Your Essence
Using HSP, I was able to locate the core star within the body. It is literally in the center of the body. I realize that the essence of the core is everywhere, but focusing on this central location in the body helps one contact it. The core star is located about one and one-half inches above the navel on the center line of the body. It looks like a brilliant light of many colors. (See Figure 18-1 in the color insert.) This light can expand infinitely. It has a very familiar feeling of unhindered self within it. It is the you that you have been throughout this life. It is the you that you were before this particular life. It is the you that will continue to be after this particular life. It is the you that exists beyond time and space. This essence of self is different for every person. It is your unique essence. That is the individuated divine within you.
What may be confusing about the core essence is that it also exists in the divine unitive principle, or God. That is, it is both the individuated God within us and the universal God at the same time. It is this paradox that sometimes is not easy for us to understand. How can I be me and God at the same time? God is so vast. God is beyond human understanding. How could I call myself God when I know that God is much more than me? The only way to answer that question is through the experience of the core star. Through bringing conscious awareness to the core star, sensing it, and then discovering that this essence is the same as the self, we can resolve this human paradox.
Once you can experience your core essence, you will be able to find it everywhere. You will find it everywhere in your body. You will find it everywhere in your auric field. You will find it everywhere in your haric level. You will find it everywhere in your life. You will find it stretched out to the far reaches of the universe. You will find it everywhere you look for it.
Your core essence expresses itself to certain degrees everywhere. The places in your intention, your life energy fields, in your physical body, and in your life where it is most fully expressed are the places where you are healthy and happy. The places where it is expressed the least are the places where you are least happy, in discomfort, or have problems. It is as simple as that. Therefore, we have come around to the beginning of this book, where disease is described as a signal that we have in some specific way become disconnected from our core essence. We have disconnected from our inner divinity. We have forgotten who we are. Using HSP, we can “see” this as disconnection from the core.
Disconnection from the Core
In the core star level, dysfunction is almost always related to people being disconnected from their core in some way. It isn’t that there is something wrong in the core itself; it is that something is wrong in the connection between the core and the other levels of their existence. In some way, the core essence is not being transmitted all the way through into the physical world. It could be caused by a dysfunction in the auric or haric level that does not allow the core essence through. Or the core star may be shrouded with dark clouds of energy or even encased in a very dense, resilient substance. The pulsations and light from the core star are not allowed to emerge.
People severely disconnected from their cores have no connection to their creativity. They do not experience themselves as having an inner divinity. They cannot experience themselves as a unique center of light in the universe. These people have forgotten who they are and have a great deal of trouble connecting to the higher self or even knowing that they have a higher power within them.
Healing with the Core Essence
It is clear, because of the importance of the core star level, that all healings should include some work to upwell the core essence into all the levels above it. Any parts of the haric level, the auric field, and the physical body that have been worked on in any healing should be flooded with the core essence before closing a healing. This is true because anywhere the physical body, the auric field, or the haric level has been distorted, the core essence is also prevented from coming forth in its full brilliance.
To give a healing, first the healer uses HSP to appraise the condition of the physical, auric, haric, and core levels. The healer gives healing on each of the levels, beginning with either the aura or the hara, whichever is appropriate for the client. After this work is completed, the healer uncovers and then upwells the client’s core star into each of the levels above it. The core essence is first upwelled into the haric level, then into the auric, and then into the physical body. The healer expands the client’s core star so that the individual essence of the client fills his or her intention on the haric level, personality in the auric field, and every cell in the physical body. Then the healer expands the core light from the body out as far as is comfortable for the client. It may be a few feet, or it may extend to the far reaches of the universe in this way.
A good example of such a healing took place during a sophomore class around December 1989, when a student from the West Coast came in on crutches with her left leg in a brace. I’ll call her Sarah. She said she had been in a snow-skiing accident and had badly torn the anterior cruciate ligament in her left knee. A brief HSP appraisal showed me that she had torn ligaments inside the knee that needed to be repaired. I could also see that her hara had become misaligned and that the deeper issue was her relationship to her budding healership. I asked her if I could use her knee as a teaching tool for the class and worked on her in front of the class.
I began the healing by interviewing all the students who had worked on her before I was able to and discussed what the results of each healing were. I then proceeded to repair more of the auric field, do a hara healing, and then to upwell the core essence into the cells of her body. As a result of her healings, she did not need surgery, and her leg healed very well. I interviewed her two years later, in December 1991, to follow up on the effect of the healings she received. Here are some excerpts from what Sarah told me:
When it first happened, I was in Yosemite. I was way up on this mountain. It was the first time I was on snow skis. I was in a class. We had been skiing all day and had slowly worked our way up higher and higher on the mountain. When I fell, I felt my knee pop out. My class kept going down the mountain. Then they stopped. I knew I shouldn’t get up, but I didn’t want them to come up and get me, so I got up and slowly skied down the mountain. I turned in my rental skis hobbling and aching.
I stayed in my cabin that night. It was the most miserable night of my life. I was really sick. The next morning I went to the hospital. Driving back down the mountain I was throwing up. I was green. They gave me something for the pain. They said, “This is very serious. You need to see an orthopedist right away.” They immobilized my leg.
I went to see an orthopedist. My knee was swollen so badly that he couldn’t do the fancy X-ray they can do. But from his poking and prodding and trying to get some range of motion out of it, he said it looked very serious. Everything pointed to the fact that I would probably need surgery in about ten days. He said, “This is serious.” He said that I would need to come back in five days, but I said I wanted to go back to the East Coast to healing class in two days.
He looked at me and said, “You’re insane. You must really want to go. I’m not going to tell you not to go, but you are going to be pretty miserable being on planes. But I’ll leave it up to you. Sounds nuts to me.
It turns out that the trip was fine. The airlines just gave me wheelchairs, and there were three seats in my row, so I was pretty comfortable. Of course, I was with Tony, a classmate, and she took care of my luggage.
Tony worked on me once before I went east, right after I saw the orthopedist. And that’s when I actually saw, using HSP, that she connected two threadlike strands in my auric field. The cruciate is a cross. That’s what cruciate means in Latin. It’s a cross hinge on the inside of the knee. She connected two of the threads that were just kind of hanging out there. They looked, using HSP I learned in class, like white, snakish-looking threads. And she put those back in. That was actually pretty painful when she put that back together. I was really sweating when she got in there.
Then I came back to class and I had three different classmates work on it. Somebody just ran level one energy into it, which I felt starved for. It was the first time I really understood what is meant by physical energy. Then Martin did a little bit of work on it. Each day someone worked on me, my knee got a little better. But I was still in a lot of pain, and there was no way I could put weight on it.
Then you put me up onstage and used my knee as a teaching tool. You invited each person who had worked on me to come up and talk about what they had seen using HSP and what they did. And then you had me give feedback about how that was for me. Then I remember you started doing the hara work, because we hadn’t known anything about that. You were standing at my feet and conversing with the class, and I remember the incredible sensations that were moving up my legs. I was thinking, “I don’t know what this is, but whoa, something is going on here!”
A tremendous amount of sensation was running up my legs and through my whole body, and I was really feeling very affected by that. And then you said, “Oh, yes. What I’m doing now is working with hara.” I remember lying there on that table with such a powerful sensation going on in my body, and I kind of went out. You did a core star closing after you did the core star, which was new. We’d never seen that before, and I didn’t really know what you were doing.
I was out for a long time after you worked on me. I stayed on the stage probably for an hour or two just lying flat. And I remember getting up and being able to walk on my knee after that. I wasn’t bearing full weight. I was just doing a little bit of a limp, and I had walked about halfway across the floor. And you said to me, “Don’t do that yet! Get your crutches and give it a little bit of time to solidify.”
After you worked on me, I felt very good. I didn’t need my brace after that. But it wasn’t just my knee—my whole body felt very good. I felt very solid in ways that I hadn’t before. A pretty major shift happened for me from that time. A lot of things happened. I was always a skeptic about this work, and I had been questioning my place and the reality of this work. Then to have such a major injury that looked like I was going into surgery and to have the work be so effective and so incredibly helpful meant a lot for me. It really did heal my knee. It’s as if I had to let myself know from a real basic level, in spite of myself, what this work really could do. It felt like a whole shift happened for me in that I got very solid in my work. It helped me connect to this work. A lot got very clear and focused for me.
When I went back to the orthopedist, he was surprised and amazed at my healed knee. He watched my knee for a couple of weeks. I really went back for him. I was swimming to strengthen the knee. I worked on my own knee on level one of the aura a lot, mostly charging level one of my knee.
The deeper meaning? I had had a lot of left-side injuries. It was very connected to the woman side of me. I needed to be able to step out of the world and receive. I did a lot of work on my feminine principle. I had lots of dreams about my little girl inside. I needed to surrender and receive. It was about going home to that place inside, to that place of balance, that true place inside of me that I call true life. It was also about standing on my own and believing in myself and believing that I have something to offer. Shortly after it happened, my healership began to unfold. Doing this work is a way that I get to keep coming home, because to work with people, I have to go to that place. For me, the challenge is how can I do that for myself!
Opening Corridors to Your Core
Spend a few moments now bringing your conscious awareness to the physical location associated with the core star in the center of your body, about one and one-half inches above your navel. In a short time you will feel calm, relaxed, full of light, and powerful, and your sense of self will be enhanced. Opening HSP to the core star level is a wonderful experience. First you may see your own core star, in all its unique brilliance. Then, if you look at a room full of people, what you see is a room full of stars—each one different, each brilliant and exquisite. It is as if the stars sing to each other through the space filled with core light that is known as the Almighty. (See Figure 18-2 in the color insert.)
If you give a few minutes a day (only five will have an effect) to focusing your attention on this central core of your being, your life will change. You will begin a conscious path of change in your life that will take you to places you have always wanted to be able to go but couldn’t get to. You may experience great spiritual heights of wonderment. You will also release issues that you have avoided facing, sometimes for your whole life. They will come to the foreground of your life to be experienced and healed. You will begin to create the things you have always wanted but have not yet created in your life.
Opening the internal corridor to our core will allow the love, truth, and courage within us to come forth. This is the essential process in healing. By opening this internal corridor, healing energy automatically upwells through all four dimensions of our creative energy and flows forth to be given in healing to the self or to another person. Healing energy automatically flows from anyone who opens his or her internal corridor between the outer personality and the core star. It is easy to feel this healing energy when you are in the presence of such a person. You feel calm, relaxed, safe, and full.
You have already automatically made the connection from your personality to your core through your higher self. Most people are rather shy about the true nature of being in their higher self. It feels a bit like being unveiled. It is like being undefended. So spend some time getting to know your higher self. Which parts of you are already clear, pure, and loving? When you become more aware of what those parts are, you can allow them to express themselves more. You will become more used to expressing your love and caring for others without being so shy.
Our core star is our divine source. Opening the internal corridor to our divine source also automatically connects us to the external divine source of love and energy all around us, to what I call universal divinity. It is by accepting the divine within us, which is the individualized, localized God within, that we are brought to know universal God. Another way to say it is, opening the internal corridor to God creates an external boulevard to God. Or in reverse, it is by surrendering to God, or to the divine above us, below us, and all around us, that we are brought to the divine within us, or the God within. One is not possible without the other.
Everything that we do originates from the core star, as does every positive intention. Pleasure is its motivating force, and it creates only joy and fulfillment.
Here is the creative path that our core essence takes as it expands into the world of manifestation. As our creative force upwells from this core star, it brings great pleasure with it. As the core essence emerges into the hara dimension on its way to our physical world, it upwells into the center of the three points along the hara line. If all three points are in alignment, we have aligned our intent with the best in us, and we have synchronized with divine intent. In other words, God’s will and our will are one. When we then allow the core essence to upwell into this divine intent, we also express our individual essence through our intent or our purpose. We express individual divine purpose.
As the core essence upwells into the auric level, it upwells into the centers of the chakras and expands to permeate the whole auric field with the essence of who we are. Then we express our divine essence with our personality.
When the core essence upwells into the physical level, it upwells in the nucleus of each cell, in the DNA. It expands throughout the whole body until divine light shines so brilliantly that it literally shines through our skin, and we are radiant. Then we express our divine essence through our physical bodies. It is a beautiful sight to see. Our essence fills the room, and all who are present can experience and delight in it.
Here is a meditation channeled from Heyoan to bring forth your essence through each level of your being.
CORE STAR MEDITATION
Channeled from Heyoan
Step One: Hara Alignment
Bring your awareness to the tan tien, an inch and a half below your belly button on the midline of your body. Feel the power there. Feel the heat there. Feel how it is the same as the heat in the molten core of the earth. It is a harmonic of the sound the core of the earth makes. Stay focused there until it is very hot.
Bring your awareness to an area in the upper chest, about two and one-half inches below the hollow in your throat. Here, on the haric level, the soul seat in the chest is like the diffuse light around a candle. The soul’s longing, the song of the soul, resides here. It is not the heart chakra. When you connect with it, sometimes it feels like a ball being blown up inside your chest. It has a very clear, spherical appearance. It carries the soul’s longing.
Feel the laser line now that goes from the soul seat in your chest, down through the tan tien in your pelvis, and into the center of the earth. Feel the strength and silence in the room as our individual and our group purposes become synchronous.
Bring your awareness to the point above your head. Straighten your spine. Don’t let your head hang. Imagine a fine thread through the very top of your head. If you don’t feel it, pick up a hair right at the very top of your head, pull up as if there were a string on which your head is hanging. With your mind’s eye, reach up to that very tiny opening, about a quarter of an inch in diameter, two and a half to three feet above your head. You will hear a very high-pitched sound if your auditory perception is open. When you are able to place that laser line through that hole, you will actually hear it as a pop. It kind of pops through. It’s not easy to find that high point. It’s like a little vortex. When you find it, it’s like going through into a totally different reality, way above you. If you pop through, you will find yourself within the godhead, or undifferentiated “is”-ness. In order to get that line through, you have to completely align your physical body.
Feel that very tiny laser beam half the size of your little finger, going all the way through you from the godhead to the molten core of the earth. Feel the soul’s song in your chest and the creative force in your tan tien. Feel that at the same time you feel the line all the way down to the molten core of the earth. Feel that power. That’s the alignment for your task. This is the bridge. This is you and the bridge between heaven and earth.
Feel the synchronicity of the purpose now in the room. That same line going down right through the middle of the room is the hara line of the group. Feel the connection from your tan tien to the tan tien of the group—that’s in the center of the room.
It is upon this level that your task and the task of the greater group of which you are a member synchronize. It is on this level that the task of this group will synchronize with that of the greater community around. That will then synchronize with that of the state, the country, the continent, and the earth. This is the way to connect to the power and truth of a system within a system within a greater system. It is the key to holographic universal alignment. There is no need to struggle or to worry that your task is difficult. It need not be. For when you align yourselves on these levels—the core star, the aura, the hara, and the physical body—then you are in synchronicity with the world around you as well as yourselves.
Move your awareness now to the core star, an inch and a half above your belly button. Here resides the essence of who you are beyond time, beyond space, beyond longing and desire. At this place you simply are. There is no need. There is no pain. You simply are creator. When you as creator move forth from the core star of your essence to create, you first bring creative energy into the level of the hara, your divine task. From the haric level, you bring energy to the auric level, creating your personality, template for the physical. From the auric level you bring energy into the physical, to create life in form in the physical body.
The creative force moves from the one (core star) through trinity (represented by the point above your head, the point within your chest, and the point within your tan tien on the haric level) through the level of seven (the seven layers of the auric field) and into the multiplicity of form in the three-dimensional world. When you have completed one plan of creation, you will then move forth more of your essence into the trinity, through which shines your purpose.
So allow your essence now to exude itself strongly and steadily from your core star, through your haric level and into your auric field. Allow that essence to flow through each layer of the field. Each layer of the field represents a state of being, a level of being in humanness. Bring the essence of your being through each of those levels of human being. Then bring it through to the physical, to crystallize in your body, through every cell of your body. It will create health, joy, and pleasure in your physical life and your life’s work. Your body, your personality, and your life are all expressions of your divine essence.
And so the one has become the trinity has become the seven, and as you open the seals of the seven, you will know God within the human being. Look now within each cell of your body. You will find in the nucleus of each cell a configuration very similar to your core star—a point of light radiating forth the essence of your being within every cell of your physical body. Healing, then, is simply helping your self connect with the truth of your being. It is nothing more than that.
Where there is pain or illness, anger or fear, where there is suspicion or greed, where there is forgetting, remember your core star. Allow the light within your core star to emerge. Remember the light within every cell of your body. Remember your body. Bring the members of your body together within the light of your body, your altar in form. That light is the light of your core star, your essence, the God within.
Your task did not come from pain; it came from the desire to create. It came from the flow of love out of the center of your being, which in its creative movement out from the core became disconnected and forgot who it is. It is only a matter of reconnecting with the memory of who you are. Your life task is to remember that original creative urge and to complete your creation so that another will well up from the source within you.
Let the essence of who you are that rests within your core star shine forth through all levels of your being. Allow that original creative urge there to lead you through your life.
The Core Star and the Creative Pulse of Life
Recently, in a lecture on creativity, Heyoan described the phases of the creative process in relationship to the four dimensions of our being. He said that the creative pulse arises out of our core and upwells through all the levels above into the material world, as you just experienced in the meditation. Heyoan said that the creative pulse then manifests fully in our lives as our life creations. For example, we paint a painting, write a book, build a house, make a scientific discovery, or create an organization. When we are finished, we celebrate. We have great feelings of accomplishment and say we have done it!
But Heyoan says it is here, at the apparent height of our creativity, that we must be careful about how we view our accomplishment. He says that our work of art or discovery is not the final product of our creative process. He reminds us that the purpose of life in the duality of the physical plane is to hold up a mirror to ourselves so that we might recognize our divine individuality. Our final product of art or scientific discovery or organization is really our most highly polished mirror. It is the point of highest discernment that says, “Look, see yourself reflected here in this accomplishment.” It is really only the midpoint of the creative process.
The creative process or pulse of life has four phases. First is the stillness of the empty void deep within the core star. This is a point of stasis. Then comes the expansion out of the core, as the essence of who you are expresses itself through the levels of intention (haric level), personality (auric level), and into the physical world. At the height of physical expression, when we look into our highly polished mirror, we go into the next phase. It is the stasis at the end of our expansion into individualism. Here we pause for self-observation. Then soon afterward, the creative pulse of life moves back inward from the physical world into the auric, down into the haric level, and then back into the core. It is here, deep within the core, that we reach the fourth and final stage of the creative pulse of life. We again move into stasis deep in the core.
So what really is our final product of creation? Once we have had a good look in our highly polished mirror of self-discernment, we bring our creations back through the level of personality, through intentionality, and into the deeper self. As the creative force jumps back down through each dimension, each phase brings our learning with it. That learning moves from the physical world, to the psycho-noetic world of feeling-thoughts, into the noetic world of pure ideas, down into the world of intentionality, and deep into our essence. Our final creation then is the distilled essence of our core.
This creative process is continually occurring. We continually create more individual core essence. We are always somewhere on this creative wave in every part of our lives. I would guess we are probably on every part of the pulse all the time but in different areas of our life experience.
We are surrounded and interpenetrated by a pulsating universal wave of creation. We are of it, we are it, it is us. It flows through us, and we flow through it. There is no end and no beginning. We create it as it creates us. There is no initiator. There is only the creative wave of life that is constantly unfolding and enfolding. In its unfolding time is created. In its enfolding time is dissolved. It is what David Bohm, the renowned physicist, calls the “implicate order.”
The creative wave begins with enfolded stasis, then it unfolds up and outward from the core star through the dimensions above into the physically manifest world and expands outward to the far reaches of the universe. The expansion slows, stops, and rests in stasis. It has woven the golden threads of new creation through all that there is, through all the manifest world. Here it communes with all that it has merged with. In this merger, love is created. Love remains. And then it begins the long journey of contraction. It enfolds upon itself. It returns through the four dimensions of our creative energies back into our core star, bringing all that it has learned and created back into the individual self.
Most of us do not give enough time for the stasis part of our creative wave. There are two phases in the stasis part of the creative wave: the part before expansion, when we are contracted and merged within our deepest self, and the part after expansion, when we are expanded and merged with another.
In the first, we need quiet time alone to integrate who we are with what we have created in the past. We need to be alone to meet ourselves, to be with ourselves without doing anything. This time of centering is a time of gathering power without doing anything.
For the second type of stasis, we need time to be with others in quiet, nonverbal ways, so that we can experience the wonder of the other. We can do this in many ways, such as by being in one-on-one dyads of silent interaction or in large group meditation, simply being together without having to do anything.
Most of us really like the expansive part of the creative wave. We enjoy the tremendous amount of outward-going energy, and we feel great about ourselves. We enjoy going out into the world on an adventure to learn. We think it is exciting to go to workshops, to take classes, or to paint a picture. We feel high as we look into the creative mirror that reflects ourselves as we enter into the state of expanded stasis that follows an expansion. We want to stay there forever, and we resist a change from this state.
We resist coming back down and inward. But it is important for us to remember that we need to give equal time and attention to the contraction phase of the creative pulse and the silent void of the phase of deep inner stasis that follows contraction. Many of us do not like contraction. Many of us get upset after a large expansive project and go into depression when it is finished. This is because many of us do not understand the natural contraction of the creative process, do not know how to honor and savor it to its fullest.
The phase of the creative principle in which we are enfolding or contracting back into the self is the one we resist the most because negative feelings about ourselves are usually evoked in this stage. Let me explain why.
In the phase of expansion, a great deal of energy moves through our bodies and energy system. This powerful energy begins to bring light to our dark, stagnated energy blocks, which brings life and conscious awareness back into them. As a result, they loosen and begin to move. Then we experience the energy-consciousness in them as part of the healing or enlightening process. To say it more simply, in the expansion phase we are high on our new knowledge and our new creations. But with this new knowledge we also see our faults more clearly. It’s okay as long as we focus on the mirror of our new creations, but as we contract our focus turns inward. We see faults that we perhaps have not noticed before. The problem is that we begin to judge and reject ourselves for what we can now see and feel. These judgments increase our negative feelings about ourselves, and we just don’t want to feel them.
Therefore, we do not want to be present on the wave as it retreats back into ourselves through the second level of our field, where our feelings about ourselves exist. So we resist the contraction. We try to stop the enfolding pulse of the wave, or we jump off it, and we interrupt the creative process. To do this, we disconnect from what we have created. We either throw it away by devaluing it, or we give it away by saying that we did it for someone else. Eventually, we even begin to believe that we did the creation for someone else, not for ourselves. It is as if we believe it is wrong to create something for our own pleasure, as if it wouldn’t benefit others. This causes more pain.
The reason why many of us avoid creating is because we do not know how to complete the creative process by bringing what we created back to ourselves to honor ourselves for what we have accomplished. The process of honoring and acknowledging ourselves is the process of looking into the reflective mirror of manifestation so that we can recognize the individual divine within us. It is a very important phase of the creative process. We need to learn how to experience a contraction in a positive way.
Heyoan says:
Contracting is the coming in to the self, drawing yourself within to the wisdom that has been there forever. After an experience, such as a great success or even a healing, in about three days’ time, perhaps sooner, you will most automatically contract. This contraction need not be a negative experience. It is one where you go within the self to recognize the self and later to find the next land, the next inner horizon, the next secret sacred room within the self. It is from this inner place that you will find a new life. If you give yourself the time and the faith after each of your expansions to move inside, to sit in silence with the self and to rerecognize who you are from a new level, then the expansion emerges most automatically. If you allow the natural flow of the contraction that brings you inward and view it from the aspect of a positive experience, you will not need to create negative experiences in your outer life that force you to go within.
Thus, by scheduling time for yourself after an expansion to go within, you will find an automatic positive flow inward. There you reach a point of silence; of sitting in the black velvet void within you that is teeming with undifferentiated life waiting to be born into manifestation. You will find this void deep within your core star. Out of that life comes a reemergence of the phoenix. It is the new self that manifests with an additional aspect of your core essence that has never been added to the self before.
We do not always allow the creative pulse to move through us unobstructively because we are afraid to experience it. It brings life experience and change. We are afraid of both. We block it because we still believe that life experience can be dangerous. We go into defense and move out of the moment of the now.
Recently Heyoan gave a lecture about our choice for defense and how that choice creates healing cycles in our lives. He titled it “Whom Do You Serve? “
WHOM DO YOU SERVE?
Channeled from Heyoan
Center yourselves, and run through the alignment of your field: by connecting down into the earth, aligning with your life task or the hara line; by moving through each chakra and clearing it; by bringing your awareness up through all the levels of the field; and by walking yourself step by step into the core of your being. Ask yourself, “Whom do I serve? Why have I come to earth? Not only my short minute-to-minute purpose, but also my longer-term one.”
From the perspective of the space/time continuum, you are creating in an apparently linear, moment-to-moment fashion. These creations follow the line of your intent. Each of your actions, each of your choices reflects whom you have chosen to serve. When you are present in the unfolding moment, you remain connected to your core energies and your core purpose. Thus your creative energies flow forth from your core unobstructed. You create pleasure and joy in your life. You serve the divine within you, your core.
When you are not present, as in defense, you are not directly connecting with the creative energies that move forth from your core star. You are not directly serving your creative core. If you choose to “protect yourself” by going into defense, then you are serving the illusion that you need a defense. Your defense takes you out of the unfolding moment. It tries to freeze time to control events to stop or prevent something from happening. The intent to stop the creative flow is called negative intent. It is the intent to forget.
We do not say this to you in a reprimanding way. Part of your life task is to learn to let go of your defense and learn to stay centered within yourself. Once you do go into your defense and create from there, since you are always creating no matter where you are, you then create lessons for yourself to learn. These lessons will, in time, automatically take you back to the core of your being. Such lessons can be seen as healing cycles.
You exist in a fail-safe system of healing or learning cycles. It is a system that you have devised. When you blame the system, you move another step away from your core purpose or divine intent. Another circle is created. The secondary circle, of course, is another healing cycle. And in your creations, you create healing cycles that can be considered to be either of primary or secondary order.
In your moment-to-moment, back-and-forth movement between positive clear intent and negative intent, you create first joy and then more healing cycles, through which you will go in your healing process. One supports the other. The more joy and pleasure in your life, the greater the foundation upon which you will rest as you go through cycles of learning and healing. The more learning you achieve, the more faith you have in your healing cycles. The more you accomplish in your life, the greater the pleasure and joy you can create. Thus your moment-to-moment process of creating your experience of life always brings you ultimately more to pleasure and joy!
I am here today to tell you that your healing cycles need not be so painful. The natural process of creation includes the expansive, contracting, and static principles. Many of the problems that you have come from not understanding the creative process and how to assist yourself as you go through it. The new cycles of lessons that lie before you will be easier if you stay with the truth of the self; that is, the truth of who you are in the moment, what you are capable of doing in that moment, and what is right for you to do in that moment.
Beneath your inability to stay with yourself in each moment lies a distrust. But you resist contraction, assuming that it is going to be painful.
Consider the possibility that a contraction is defined as going inside or enfolding to bring all of the treasures from the world that you have touched while you were in your expanded state to your inner self. In contraction, you bring those gifts down and place them on your inner altar for self-acknowledgment of what you have accomplished.
Contraction is sitting in those gifts, sitting in those learnings and bringing them to the inner child. It is laying them on the altar of the inner child that was wounded long ago and saying, “Here, look what I brought you from the outer world.” Just as an adult, a mother or father, brings gifts to a child, a contraction brings gifts to the inner child. One of the great traditions in this culture is that when parents go on a trip, they bring a gift home to the child. That gift is not only for their own physical child but for their inner child. Many times their child inside enjoys that gift as much as the physical child and indeed sometimes more, as you have undoubtedly experienced. So bring these gifts to the inner self.
If you are in a contractive phase because you have just had a powerful expansive life experience or deep learning, then allow yourself to be taught from the contraction. If you are experiencing pain, then allow that to be the teacher. Do not hide, do not force yourself into a defense that will cause you to hide. If you must do a job, then do it from that place. If you are a teacher, then teach from that place. If you hide, your work will not express your essence. It will not be full. By allowing yourself to be undefended while you work, you will move to a state of pleasure.
Now what I am asking you to do is indeed very difficult. I am, in a sense, asking you not to do what you have always done to make yourself feel safe when you do not feel safe. I understand this and say it with full compassion. We are here for you, with you. We move with you at the boundary of your creative wave. And as you may have experienced during a healing session, when your healer is with you moment to moment at the boundary of your creative wave, the pain is not so great. It simply becomes a wave of life that is expressing itself.
So when I ask, “Whom do you serve?” consider that who you serve is the God or Goddess within you. That the source you are serving is the core star, the expression of the true individuality of God. And that if you question what to do next, or where to go or what to say, then move to the center of your being. If you encounter the inner wounded child, as you move to your core star, take it up into your arms and take it with you.
Allow that core star to expand within. If that means that you need a few moments before you speak to answer a question or follow through with an activity, then take the time because that is how you can be in your truth no matter what is going on on the outer level [in the outer world]. Simply say, “I need time right now. I need to catch up with myself and find the edge of my wave. When I find it, then I can commune with you. But before so, I am not even in communion with myself. How can I commune with you?”
When you are in the moment, being with yourself, with your wave, you are most perfect and most synchronized with the world. If you wonder why certain days flow effortlessly, it is because you are in synchronicity with your creative expanding, resting, contracting, resting creative wave. And of course, when you are with yourself, you are with the universe, with all that there is, with the divine that is manifest in the physical as well as the spiritual. That is your most natural form. That is who you are. That is who we are. For we are a part of you, as you are a part of us.
As you descended into the plane of the earth that carries both joy and sorrow, you forgot these truths I have spoken. You split into duality, leaving your guide in the spirit world. We the guides can be considered to be that which you will become and that which you already are. Yet you are more. So if you hold your personal guide in high esteem, realize that he or she is you. The portion of you that is incarnated carries a bit more forgetting than that which is manifested within the guide. That is the only difference between us. And we are always here to remind you and to bring you into synchronicity. That is the nature of what this work is about. It is a gift that you bring to the earth and the gift that we bring to you.
So as you move through your healing process, walk with yourself. We walk next to you, close to you, within you. Move through the creative way that is you. You will be most delighted with what the creative force within you has for you.
Self-Healing by Being on the Pulse of the Creative Wave
Healing and remaining healthy means becoming consciously aware of and staying on our creative wave. It means being present in the unfolding moment. It means being who we are in each moment of time. We can consciously follow the life pulse as it moves up through our four dimensions of creative energy. We can be with it in each moment as it moves through our auric field, level by level.
To bring this chapter to a close, I would like to share with you a meditation that Heyoan gave toward the end of the 1989–90 training program. It is a meditation to keep your conscious awareness firmly placed upon your creative wave as it moves through you. It brings you to the center of yourself, which is alive, creative, and free. In it, you become the pulse of life.
THE UNFOLDING SELF
Channeled from Heyoan
Listen to the internal music that plays who you are. Feel the light welling up within you, within every cell of your body. Connect down into the ground and connect with your purpose in being here. What is the task that is set before you in this very moment? What have you come for, and what is there to learn in this very moment of your unfolding? Rather than thinking of what must be next, bring yourself to the unfolding moment within you and sit sweetly within every cell of your body—not who you wish to be, but who you are in this moment.
As you move through your expansion, then stasis/communion, and then pull down into the self in contraction, ride the wave all the way in. You will find a layer of pain, but simply ride through it to the child. As you take the child in hand, go deeper to the core of your being, to your individuality, and move deep inside this core into the great void within the self. Experience this great void, for it represents your potential. Within this void all of life is pulsing, vibrating, full, yet unborn. Here is great peace. Sit in grace within this inner void. This void is not empty, although it may appear that way from the personality level. The more one enters into this void within the self, the more life one finds. Simply surrender to the safety and to the grace of this inner center, letting go of all attachments.
When there is movement out of seemingly nothing, simply ride the expansion of the pulse of life that comes outward, filling the space with manifest life, filling the space with understanding. As you go upward and outward, you will feel this life pulse moving through the levels of your auric field. There will be a level where the mind begins again. If you continue through, you will move onward and outward through all the levels of your field and all the personal experience within each level. You are experiencing life manifesting. You are experiencing the creative process. This expansion continues outward indefinitely. Allow your conscious awareness to ride this pulse as far out as it is able. Know that this pulse goes to the far reaches of the universe. It is only your images that limit you. Bring your conscious awareness to this process. As you expand, reach in a 360-degree sphere outward as far as you will go. Expand, reaching through the infinite universe. There, there will be communion with all that is outside or apparently outside. This is where fusion takes place. Sit in it. Then once again, as your creative wave enfolds, simply follow it back in.
This expansion and contraction takes place every moment. It is a multifold expansion/stasis and contraction/stasis pulse. There are fast pulses and slow pulses. There are pulses of which you will never be able to be aware with the conscious mind, for they are inconceivable.
And so as you travel inward again, once again you will move through the levels of the field. As what you nave learned is brought back through all the levels of your field and thus your personality, the new gifts bring light into your individuality. As that light comes in through your field, those portions of your being that are stagnated within your negative image are enlightened. When the light first touches the forgetting, many times you experience pain. For it evokes memories. It evokes energy and consciousness that have not been clear. In the beginning of the process, as you go in through the emotional levels of the field, you will feel your emotional pain. Do not stop the movement. Continue to bring the light in and lace it through all of these disappointments; through the fears, through the sadness, through the grief, through the mourning that you have experienced in your life.
If you continue on the inward pulse down, bringing light and the understanding that you are one with all that there is, you become one with the pain. You are one with the individuals that are involved in this pain. And thus, in the fusion of the duality that apparently exists between you and those involved in a painful incident in your life, love is born. For what is touched with light will create love. For communion creates love. As you go deeper through the pain and the fear, the very process of this communion creates love. It is brought down into the inner child and placed at the feet of the child, and that love touches the original wound of the child and it is healed. It continues down into the core star, the essence of who you are. Once again you sit in the void, having brought more light to the inner light. Simply sit in the mother in grace. With this grace, you are in communion with the great mother, and again love is born.
Later the movement outward begins. The child having been nourished to fullness now moves away as its inner cup runneth over. Having been born out of love, it moves into its own, feels its individual self and its body. It likes and loves what it feels. It has more love for itself. It understands itself and thus has its value. Being valuable, it feels its love for others and continues outward. This love for others evokes their love. The child receives the love and validation back from others. Loving validation brings courage as the child’s conscious awareness expands through divine will. It feels its wholeness and its divinity and enters into spiritual ecstasy. Entering spiritual ecstasy, the child is brought through to perceive the perfect pattern and the knowledge of the divine mind. It moves outward through the far reaches of the universe, out to that which has been called the father, once again approaching fusion. Your inner self moves through the manifest universe, creating more life as you go, bringing the gifts that the individual self has manifested to the universe.
This is the creative process. It dissolves dualism. Thus, you create your world around you: through the expansion, stasis, and communion with the universe around you; and the contraction, stasis, and communion with your interior individuality. It is you—
The Unfolding Self