F

FABRIC DRESSING

(see ‘New Clothing’)

FAECES

(Human)

On carpet/upholstery

Remove excess by lifting with a plastic comb or by blotting with paper towel.
Scribble with a cake of bathroom soap run under cold water.
Wipe with a damp cloth.
Massage with a couple of drops of dishwashing liquid on your fingertips until the liquid feels like jelly.
Wipe with a damp cloth until the dishwashing liquid is removed.
Absorb moisture by covering the area with paper towel. Place a book on top of the paper towel to assist with absorption.

On cotton/fabric

Remove excess under the tap using cold water.
Scribble with a cake of bathroom soap run under cold water.
Massage with a couple of drops of dishwashing liquid on your fingertips until the liquid feels like jelly.
Rinse using cold water.
Alternatively, mix ½ lid of Vanish NapiSan Oxi Action in a 9-litre bucket of cold water and soak for 20 minutes. Don’t use on wool, silk or leather.
In both cases, wash according to the fabric. Dry in sunshine.

FAKE TAN

On carpet/upholstery

Sprinkle with talcum power and rub with paper towel.
Massage with equal parts lavender oil and dishwashing liquid on your fingertips until the liquid feels like jelly.
Wipe with a cold damp cloth.
Absorb moisture by covering the area with paper towel. Place a book on top of the paper towel to assist with absorption. Repeat, if needed.

On cotton/fabric

Sprinkle with talcum power and rub with paper towel.
Massage with equal parts lavender oil and dishwashing liquid on your fingertips until the liquid feels like jelly.
Rinse using cold water.
Wash according to the fabric. Dry on the clothesline or clothes airer.

FANTA

(see ‘Soft Drink’)

FAT

(see ‘Cooking Oil’)

FAUX FUR

To clean

For a dry clean, place 1 cup of unprocessed wheat bran in a large bowl. Add drops of white vinegar one at a time, stirring as you go, until the mixture resembles breadcrumbs. It shouldn’t be wet.
Place in the toe of pantyhose, tie off tightly and rub over the faux fur. Brush with a hairbrush to fluff it up.
For a wet clean, add 1 teaspoon of cheap shampoo to a 9-litre bucket of blood-heat (body temperature) water.
Soak for 20 minutes.
Rinse on the spin cycle of the washing machine.
Dry flat in the shade. Never put faux fur in a dryer.
Brush with a hairbrush to fluff it up.

FELT TIP PEN

(see ‘Pen’)

FIG

On carpet/upholstery

Remove excess by lifting with a plastic comb or by blotting with paper towel.
Blot with white vinegar on a cloth.
If stubborn, wipe with 2 drops of glycerine on a cloth, then wipe with white vinegar on a cloth.
In all cases, absorb moisture by covering the area with paper towel. Place a book on top of the paper towel to assist with absorption.

On cotton/fabric

Remove excess by lifting with a plastic comb.
Apply 2 drops of glycerine to the stain.
Leave for 90 minutes.
Wash according to the fabric. Dry in sunshine.

FISH

(see ‘Seafood’)

FISH SAUCE

This is high in protein and oil.

On carpet/upholstery

Remove excess by blotting with paper towel.
To remove protein, scrub with a cake of bathroom soap and cold water on a toothbrush.
To remove oil, massage with a couple of drops of dishwashing liquid on your fingertips until the liquid feels like jelly.
In all cases, wipe with a damp cloth.
Absorb moisture by covering the area with paper towel. Place a book on top of the paper towel to assist with absorption.

On cotton/fabric

Remove excess under the tap using cold water.
Massage with a couple of drops of dishwashing liquid on your fingertips until the liquid feels like jelly.
Rinse using cold water.
Wash according to the fabric. Dry on the clothesline or clothes airer.

FLEAS

To deter

Mix 4 teaspoons of dried mint or 8 teaspoons of freshly chopped mint with 1 litre of boiling water in a spray pack. Let the mixture sit for 15 minutes.
Lightly spray over the affected area.
For carpet and upholstery, vacuum.

FLOORS

To clean carpet

Mix 2 tablespoons of bicarb, 2 tablespoons of white vinegar, 2 tablespoons of methylated spirits, 2 teaspoons of glycerine, 2 teaspoons of eucalyptus oil and 1 litre of water in a spray pack.
Lightly spray the mixture over the carpet.
Leave for 2o minutes, then vacuum.
Alternatively, sprinkle a little bicarb on the carpet, then vacuum.
Stains should be spot cleaned. Consult the appropriate stain and solution.

To clean concrete (polished)

Sprinkle with a little bicarb. Spray with white vinegar in a spray pack.
While fizzing, scrub with a broom.
Wipe with an old T-shirt wrapped around a broom. Allow to dry.
Apply carnauba wax with a polishing machine (available from hire companies or vacuum cleaner shops). Don’t use beeswax because it’s too soft.

To clean cork/timber

For instructions on how to work out the timber sealant, see page 416.
For cork and timber sealed in polyurethane, clean with 1 cup of white vinegar in a 9-litre bucket of blood-heat (body temperature) water. Add 2 drops of lavender oil for a fresh scent.
For cork and timber floors sealed in tung oil, varnish or wax, clean with 1 cup of cold black tea in a 9-litre bucket of blood-heat water. Tea raises the tannin levels in cork and timber, helping retain their colour and quality.
For unsealed timber, mix strong black tea (4–5 tea bags in 4 cups of boiling water) with 1 drop of oil of cloves in a 9-litre bucket of hot water. Wipe with a broom or cloth.

TIPS

To repair a dent in timber, place a wet, hot tea bag over the indentation and leave until the timber has expanded. If the floorboards are squeaking from rubbing together, sprinkle talcum powder over the timber and jump up and down or stomp on them to make sure the talcum powder gets into the cracks in the boards. It’s a great task for the kids. Reapply as needed.

To clean limestone/marble

This flooring is porous and alkaline-based so don’t use white vinegar. Instead, clean with pH neutral soap.
Grate 1 teaspoon of bathroom soap into a 9-litre bucket of blood-heat (body temperature) water and stir well.
Wipe the mixture over the surface with a cloth or old T-shirt wrapped around a broom.
Allow to dry.
To seal, coat with a thin layer of good-quality liquid marble flooring wax or wipe with skim milk.

To clean tiles

Sprinkle with a little bicarb. Spray with a little white vinegar.
While fizzing, sweep with a broom.
To finish, wipe with a damp cloth.
To clean grout, scrub with a plastic (not metal) scourer.

TIP

Remove tile marks with a pencil eraser.

FLUORESCENT PEN

On carpet/upholstery (not leather)

Slightly dampen the stain with water and sprinkle with uniodised salt.
Put ice cubes in a zip-lock bag and place on top until the ice melts.
Remove and blot the stain with a damp cloth.
Scribble with a cake of bathroom soap and wipe with a damp cloth.
Absorb moisture by covering the area with paper towel. Place a book on top of the paper towel to assist with absorption.

On cotton/fabric

Add 1 kg of uniodised salt to a 9-litre bucket of water.
Dip the garment in the salt solution.
Remove and put inside a plastic bag.
Place the bag in the freezer and leave overnight.
Remove from the plastic bag.
Wash according to the fabric. Dry on the clothesline or clothes airer.

On leather

Rub with white spirits on a cotton bud. Wipe in even, parallel strokes over the entire panel of leather.
Sprinkle with talcum powder.
When dry, brush the talcum powder off with your hand. Repeat if necessary.
Wipe with leather conditioner. Make your own – see Household formulas.

FLY SPRAY

On cotton/fabric

Mix dishwashing liquid and blood-heat (body temperature) water to generate suds.
Scrub with only the suds on a toothbrush.
Rinse in blood-heat water.
Wash according to the fabric. Dry on the clothesline or clothes airer.

On wallpaper

Gently rub with 2 drops of tea tree oil on a slice of brown bread.

On walls

If it’s an oil-based spray, scrub with 2 drops of dishwashing liquid on pantyhose.
Wipe with a damp cloth.
For orange stains, expose to ultraviolet light until the colour fades.

FLYSCREEN

To clean

Protect wooden doors by hanging an old sheet over them. This will prevent the timber from being splattered as you clean.
Close the window or door.
Dampen the screen with water on a cloth. Clean from the outside to the inside.
Wipe with black tea on a cloth. Clean the safety grilles as well.
Cover a soft broom head with pantyhose and sweep over the screen.

FOOD COLOURING

On carpet/upholstery

Remove excess by blotting with paper towel.
Place white vinegar on a cloth and wring tightly so it’s damp but not wet. Blot over the mark.
To remove dye, expose to sunlight or ultraviolet light. (If using ultraviolet light, protect areas around the stain with cardboard.) Check every 2 hours.
Absorb moisture by covering the area with paper towel. Place a book on top of the paper towel to assist with absorption.

On cotton/fabric

Remove excess under the tap using blood-heat (body temperature) water.
Blot with or soak in white vinegar.
Wash according to the fabric. Dry in sunshine.

FRENCH FRIES

(see ‘Potato Chips’)

FRUIT FLY

To eradicate

Use a small glass jar with a lid (a metal lid works best but plastic lids are fine). Make sure the glass is clean.
Punch holes in the lid every 2 mm using scissors.
Half-fill the jar with 1 tablespoon of Vegemite and ½ cup of vinegar (any variety).
The fruit fly will be attracted to the mixture and fly into the jar.

FRUIT JUICE

Note: Apple, grape, lime, orange and pineapple juice need to be treated differently – see the relevant entry.

On carpet/upholstery

Remove excess by blotting with paper towel.
Place white vinegar on a cloth and wring tightly so it’s damp but not wet. Blot over the mark.
Absorb moisture by covering the area with paper towel. Place a book on top of the paper towel to assist with absorption.

On cotton/fabric

Remove excess under the tap using cold water.
Blot with or soak in white vinegar. Alternatively, soak with ½ lid of Vanish NapiSan Oxi Action in a 9-litre bucket of water for 30 minutes. Don’t use on wool, silk or leather.
Wash according to the fabric. Dry on the clothesline or clothes airer.

On stone

Remove excess by blotting with paper towel.
Scrub with dishwashing liquid on a toothbrush.
Wipe with a damp cloth.
If stubborn, mix plaster of Paris and water to the consistency of peanut butter.
To each cup of mixture, add 1 teaspoon of dishwashing liquid.
Spread 5 mm to 1 cm thick over the stain.
Allow to dry completely. If it feels cold on the back of your hand, it’s not dry.
When dry, brush away.

FUR

To clean

Place the item in a large pillowcase and add 1 kg of unprocessed wheat bran.
Secure the top of the pillowcase and shake vigorously for about 3 minutes.
Open the pillowcase and lightly shake the item as you remove it, so the bran remains in the pillowcase.

FURNITURE BEETLE

To eradicate

Mix 4 teaspoons of dried mint or 8 teaspoons of freshly chopped mint with 1 litre of boiling water in a spray pack. Let it sit for 15 minutes.
Spray over the area and leave for 24 hours.