Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.
GALATIANS 1:10
I have discovered that no is often one of the most difficult words to say, but one of the most important if I want to ensure my spiritual fitness. In my own life, this has been a great challenge for many different reasons.
Apart from the fact that by nature I love to be involved in everything, in the early days of my Christian walk, I was still wounded and broken because of the abuse I experienced in my past. I had lived with rejection, abandonment, guilt, shame, and unforgiveness. In an attempt to feel loved, valued, and accepted, I never wanted to disappoint anyone, craving the approval of man at times above the approval of God.
So I accepted every ministry invitation, regardless of the toll this took on my body and my relationships. What’s more, I felt I had to personally help every person who had been wounded or broken, so I accepted an unhealthy amount of counseling appointments. Obviously this was not a sustainable way of life or ministry, as you can’t please all of the people all of the time. I ended each day feeling depleted, emptied out, exhausted. Everything I was doing was good and helpful to people, but clearly there was a problem.
This pattern of constant activity and striving continued until I accepted personal responsibility for my choices and embarked on the difficult journey of dealing with my own brokenness. I knew that instead of being a wounded healer, I needed to establish healthy boundaries and learn to say no to others (and myself) so I could say yes to God.
MOMENT OF REFLECTION
How good are you at saying no?
How would saying no make a difference in your life?