Grace
I'm so nervous I almost feel sick. I know that we have the routine practised down to a fine art, for all of Zara's faults, I know she's good at getting us into shape, but it does nothing to allay my nerves.
Maybe it's even making them worse.
It's probably just because there's so much that can go wrong. Between falling, being in the wrong place, and stumbling out of bounds, there are so many things that could result in us losing points. And I certainly don't want to be the reason that happens. Though I doubt anyone does either.
I pace up and down, trying to get rid of some of the energy.
"You should do your hair before Zara comes at you," Krissi says from her position on the bench.
I sigh and flop down next to her. "I know. Pass me my bag?"
She hands it over and I search through the pocket for my hair bobble. "Eurgh, where is it?" I murmur.
"You okay?" Krissi asks.
I let out a frustrated sigh. "I don't know where my bobble is."
"Oh, I've got a spare one." She reaches for her bag.
"No, you don't understand," I mutter. "It can't be any bobble, it has to be this one."
"Ah. You're superstitious," she says without even missing a beat.
"Aren't you?" I ask.
She shrugs. "I used to have a lucky scrunchie," she admits.
"What happened?"
"It snapped right before a performance a couple of years back."
"You're going to tell me the performance went fine, aren't you?" I guess.
She frowns. "Actually, no, I fell and sprained my ankle."
"Krissi! How is that useful right now?" I try not to let the panic build up inside me. I know I'm being irrational, but I can't help it.
"It'll be okay."
"I don't want to sprain my ankle." Or go through any of the other consequences like that.
"And you won't. You can fly, remember? If you start to fall, you can just get your wings out."
"I don't just get my wings out for anyone," I mutter. "It's intimate."
She raises an eyebrow.
"Okay, I guess it's not. But it also is? It's hard to explain." But I don't like the idea of just anyone seeing my wings.
Someone clears their throat and I look up, surprised to find Henry standing in front of us.
"I think this is yours." He holds out a blue hair bobble with white spots on it.
"Yes!" I jump to my feet and take it from him, my fingers brushing against his and making them tingle in response.
It's just the nerves. I'm sure that's all it is.
"Your lucky scrunchie?" he asks.
"How did you know?"
"Don't laugh," he responds.
"I can't promise anything."
His eyes soften as he smiles. "I have lucky shoelaces." He gestures down.
A smile tugs at the corner of my lips, but I don't laugh. I should have promised him after all. "They just look like normal ones to me."
"Yeah, but they're not."
"What's special about them?" I fiddle with my bobble, knowing that I need to put my hair up, but not wanting to end the conversation with Henry.
"I wore them during my first-ever cheer tryouts," he responds. "After I got accepted into the team, I promised myself I'd wear them every time I competed."
"That's sweet."
"What about yours?" He taps it.
"My dad gave it to me the first time I competed," I respond. "I guess that makes it special."
"Did you win?"
I nod. "It doesn't always work, though."
"Maybe because someone else didn't wear their lucky talisman?" he suggests.
"I think you're onto something there," I respond.
"I should go finish warming up. See you out there." He gives me a little wave, which I return almost awkwardly.
I turn back to Krissi who looks at me with a disbelieving expression on her face.
"What?" I scrape my hair back while I wait for her to respond, quickly tying it up.
"Just trying to work out exactly what that was." She waves in the direction Henry disappeared in.
"That was nothing. Will you pass me the hairspray?"
She digs into my bag and pulls it out, handing it to me. "That wasn't nothing."
I sigh. "It was. We were just sitting next to each other on the bus."
"Yes, let's talk about that." My best friend gives me a look that suggests she doesn't believe a word I'm saying right now. "What was that about?"
"You're asking that a lot," I murmur.
"Because you're being cagey."
I close my eyes so I can spray my hair, but also to stop me from rolling them. She's reading far too much into this when it's really nothing. I touch my hair, hating the crunch the hairspray causes. I should really get some better stuff that doesn't leave my hair feeling like this, but I never get around to it.
I open my eyes to find Krissi still sitting and looking at me as if she expects me to give her an explanation.
"All right, fine. I sat with him on the bus because we needed to lay down some ground rules for today," I say.
She raises an eyebrow.
"In our pixie dust war."
"Ah, how could I forget."
I grimace.
"I still don't fully understand what a pixie dust war even is."
I sit down next to her and stretch out my legs. "It's just a thing pixies do sometimes. They'll come up with pixie curses and throw them at each other until someone admits defeat."
"How long do they normally last?"
I shrug. "An afternoon."
"And how long has this one lasted?" she asks.
"I don't know, a few weeks."
Krissi snorts. "Yeah, sure. It's nothing."
"It is nothing. He annoys me."
"Does he, though?" The way she asks it makes it sound as if she doesn't think it's true.
I look over to where Henry is warming up with Fabio and Asher. "I guess?"
She shrugs. "Seems to me like you're having fun."
"It is fun," I admit, looking at my hands. "I like being able to use my magic, it feels good."
"And Henry?" she prompts.
"Just happens to be another pixie."
"I don't even slightly believe you," she responds. "I've had no idea what's been going on with the two of you the past few weeks, but you've been acting like you're dating."
"What? No, we haven't."
An incredulous look crosses her face. "That's just how it looks from the outside. You've both been pulling each other aside and having whispered conversations. And you've been blowing stuff at him, which I'm guessing is pixie dust?"
I nod. "That's just how I distribute it."
"Okay, sure. But then you've been staring at each other and seeking each other out. From the outside, it looks like you and Henry are totally into each other."
"But we're not," I counter.
"Sure, maybe not." Krissi shrugs. "But also maybe something to think about."
"It's nothing," I murmur, looking back over at the other pixie.
Am I deluding myself? It has been a lot of fun to be in the pixie dust war with him, and some of that is to do with the fact that we've been finding the same things amusing. But that doesn't mean anything.
Nor does the fact that I know I can trust him. Not just because of all the times he's caught me after a trick, but because he's right about the unspoken rules we've been working to. I hadn't really considered that they were there until he mentioned them, but now he has, I can see how we've both been behaving.
I'm just not sure what to do with any of that information.