Hydra’s breath hit me like a hammer. I’m immortal. It couldn’t kill me. But it made me horribly sick to my stomach.

“Dive!” I managed to call to Hercules and Cee.

They dove under the swampy waters. I drew a deep godly breath and blew Hydra’s poisoned greeting far away. By the time Hercules and Cee popped up again, the air was breathable.

“Don’t talk,” I told Hydra. “Listen.”

Hydra’s big mouth slowly closed. She tilted her head, ready to hear what I had to say.

“I was just visiting your mother in her cave,” I said. “She sends you her love.”

Hydra’s big mouth curved up in a smile.

“Hercules doesn’t really want to fight you,” I said.

“Do, too,” Hercules muttered under his breath.

“But he must do XII labors.” I quickly explained how Hera and King Eurystheus were out to get Hercules. “Your mother would like you to help Hercules, Hydra. If you’re willing to help him, nod.”

Hydra eagerly nodded all of her heads.

“Good,” I said. “Then you must go to Mycenae with Hercules and Cee. You must let them present you to King Eury.”

Hydra’s heads started nodding again.

“I’m sure the king won’t want to keep you around,” I said. “So after he checks you off the list, you’ll be free to come back here. Or go wherever you please.” I frowned. “Except for your, uh, little breath problem.”

Hydra hung her heads in shame.

“Hydra?” said Cee. “Is it true that you’ve been terrifying the neighborhood? And poisoning every mortal man, woman, or beast who comes near the swamp?”

Hydra shrugged her little blob-like shoulders.

“You didn’t mean to?” asked Cee.

Hydra shook her head vehemently.

“It was an accident, right?” Hercules asked. He knew all about accidents.

Hydra nodded. She seemed grateful that, at last, these two seemed to understand.

Now Hydra reached up with a surprisingly elegant pair of hands. She felt around on her head stalks. During the battle, multiple heads had sprouted on some of them. Now she began plucking off the extras. When picked, each one shriveled up, and she tossed what was left of it into the swamp. When she finished her weeding, she was her old nine-headed self again. All nine mouths smiled at us.

I thought Echidna would be pleased with the way this was turning out.

I walked with Hercules, Cee, and Hydra to the edge of the swamp. Hydra waded out of the water. She had extremely short legs. Her feet were big wide flippers. Walking to Mycenae with her was going to take a l-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-ng time.

“I can carry you,” Hercules told Hydra. He reached out for her, but she bent her knees and sprang up, landing on top of his head. She gripped it with her flipper feet.

“Awesome,” said Hercules. “Hop on!” he told Cee, and the lion took his usual place around our hero’s neck.

“Have a good trip!” I called after the odd-looking trio as they set off down the road.

I dashed down to the Underworld for a few days, but I was back in time to see Hercules and company stride through the gates of Mycenae. I wore my helmet, though. This was Hercules’s big moment. I didn’t want the crowd to be distracted by the presence of a god.

The citizens of Mycenae gathered around Hercules. They stared at the big, muscular hero wearing a lion around his shoulders and the world’s oddest head ornament. They ran toward the palace shouting, “Hercules is coming! Hercules is coming!”

By the time Hercules had reached the palace, a huge crowd had gathered.

“Eury!” Hercules called. He never could bring himself to call his cousin King Eury. “I’m back!”

There was no answer.

“Eury!” called Hercules. “I’ve brought Hydra.”

“Hooray! Hooray!” shouted the crowd.

“Put it down on the stoop,” came a disembodied voice.

“Eury?” Hercules looked around. “Are you inside that big bronze pot?”

“What if I am?” Eury’s voice wafted up out of the opening. “A king has to protect himself so he can rule,” he added. “I’m doing this for the good of my people.”

Hercules broke into a grin. “Come out and get your Hydra.”

A small slotted panel slid open about mid-pot. Eury’s eyes peered out at us. “I see it,” he said. “I’ll check it off the list.”

“Two down!” said Hercules. He reached up and slapped hands with Hydra. “Thanks, buddy!”

Hydra nodded. Then she jumped off Hercules’s back. She waddled over to the big bronze pot. Hydra came only halfway to the top of the pot. But as she stood there, her neck stalks began to extend up, up, up.

The crowd hushed. Everyone watched in amazement as Hydra’s neck stalks kept on growing.

“What’s happening out there?” called Eury. “Guards? This is your king speaking to you, guards. Tell me what’s happening!”

Hydra’s neck stalks reached the rim of the pot. Still they grew.

“Guards!” called Eury. “Guards? Can you hear me? Calling all guards! Get me out of here, or I’ll fire the lot of you!”

Now Hydra bent her neck stems, and with all nine heads she peered over the rim of the pot to see the king in hiding.

“Guards! Obey me, now!” Eury called. “It’s dark in here. “And I’m getting a cramp in my leg. Get over here, on the double. It’s—”

That must have been when King Eury looked up. He let out an ichor-curdling scream:

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

And then we all heard a CLUNK as King Eury fainted dead away inside his big bronze pot.