Chapter 11

It began raining partway through the gig that night. Ginny knew because she stepped outside for some air during the interval. The change in the weather seemed to signify a shift in something else too, intensifying the feeling of discontent that had been niggling at her from the start of the tour. The afternoon spent with Ash wandering the streets of Antwerp had brought that into sharp focus. Relationships needed grounding in normality. They couldn’t be all fluff and no substance for ever. She needed some commitment, even if it was only him admitting to the band that they were dating.

The atmosphere at the Antwerp venue didn’t help to quell her dissatisfaction. Normally she loved watching Ash and the guys on stage, but tonight the drums were too loud, there was too much pushing and shoving, and the crowd of women the venue crew had let backstage were a bunch of vicious cows with about as much class as dogs in handbags. Nor did she think she was the only person out of sorts. Elspeth had serious talent, in that she could make her presence felt even when surrounded by the testosterone-fuelled nightmare that was the rest of Black Halo, but tonight she looked bruised, as if, were someone to poke her too hard, she’d shatter, and what she really wanted was to sleep curled up in a real bed with a warm body beside her.

Ginny was totally on board with that. A mug of cocoa and her favourite winter socks sounded kind of heavenly right now. Enough with the smorgasbord of gore and glitter and the loud, sweaty audience, barely civilised by a thick coating of gothic gloss.

Matters worsened when she was unable to get through to Ash’s dressing room and had to wait along with a guy-hungry rabble. Cave Troll, whom she could normally charm with a wink and a flash of her stocking-tops, was off duty, apparently getting some much-needed shut-eye in preparation for an overnight drive north into Holland.

Her feeling of discontent only deepened when she watched her best friend Dani run over to meet Xane as he came off stage, and he swept her up into his arms and kissed her as if his life depended on it. She and Ash ought to have been enjoying this adventure together, supporting one another in the same way. Damn Ash and his insistence on secrecy. Could he not see that the open display of affection that Xane and Dani shared was what she wanted, not a diamond set into a piece of jewellery no one would ever see?

She was sorely tempted to say to hell with his rules, storm the barricade and go and snog him senseless for the whole room to see, but she didn’t; she patiently waited.

Fuck! She was turning into everything she’d promised herself she’d never be.

‘Move over, fat arse.’

Ginny had the breath knocked out of her as an overzealous and extremely rude fan shoved an elbow into her midriff in order to secure a space at the barrier.

’Scuse me! Fat arse? Was she kidding? Ginny was whippet-thin and always had been. Her attacker was easily double her weight. In fact her enormous boobs, squeezed into a sequinned crop-top, probably weighed as much as Ginny in her entirety.

She jabbed Ginny again to give herself more space. ‘Piss off, skankadilla.’

‘Piss off yourself. Who the hell do you think you are?’

The woman preened, twirling a lock of bottle-blonde hair around her finger. ‘The woman who’s warming Ash Gore’s bed tonight, that’s who.’ She abruptly jammed her hands on her hips and puffed out her ample chest. ‘He loves coming between my pillows, while he eats me out with his luscious tongue.’ She made an obscene gesture with her own.

Bile rose up Ginny’s throat. This was just the sort of bitch who’d been using Ash for years, and hadn’t the brains to see that he didn’t give a fuck about her. She didn’t know if the woman was telling the truth or not. Nearly every woman she’d met backstage at a Black Halo gig claimed to have been eaten by Ash Gore. Normally, Ginny didn’t think too hard about it. In this particular case, she really hoped it was a lie.

‘Yeah, he called me earlier and arranged it all.’

‘Ash did?’ she croaked incredulously. ‘You’re not even his type.’

‘Fuck you,’ the woman bawled into her face. ‘And I suppose you think you are.’

As a matter of fact, she knew she was.

‘Skank, you’re not even wearing the right clothes. Everyone knows he insists on fishnets.’

Dammit! When had that got out? That was her dynamite. By chance, she’d not worn them this evening, choosing to stick with bare legs and knee-high boots instead.

‘And let’s face it,’ the woman continued, ‘you’ve nothing up top to tempt him with.’ Along with her posse of mean girl mates who’d sidled up behind her, she stared pityingly at Ginny’s near-flat chest, before a snide smile ate up her face.

Actually, Ash had never had a problem with the size of her boobs, and Ginny knew perfectly well he found her sexy – hopefully a darn sight sexier than some mouthy little trollop – but the comment still irritated the fuck out of her. When Ash turned, seemingly drawn by the sounds of commotion, and strolled towards them, Ginny hoped he intended to correct the little bitch’s assumptions.

‘Evening, ladies, what seems to be the problem?’ Ash arrived at the barrier along with Rock Giant, Willows and Spook. Immediately, the fan-girls were all sweetness and light.

Damn, Ash looked hot tonight, in his butter-soft leathers and black Cuban-heeled boots, with his shirt unfastened except for the bottom two buttons. He held a towel in his hands that he was rubbing over his sweat-dampened hair.

To Ginny’s horror, instead of offering her a smile, his ice-blue gaze immediately settled on the trollop’s abundant décolletage. In fact, both Rock Giant’s and Iain Willows’s eyes zoomed in on it too, while Spook perfected his uninterested-elf pose. Ginny reckoned he was thinking about warm socks and cocoa too.

‘Nothing at all, we were just enjoying a bit of lively conversation,’ the girl told him, stretching out over the barrier to reach him.

‘Sounded extremely lively.’

‘Well, we’re all excited to be here.’ Her friends backed her up with murmurs of appreciation.

‘I bet you girls are up for a party?’

‘I am, if it’s taking place in your pants,’ someone behind Ginny quipped. Ash shrugged the remark off, but not the wandering hands that pawed at his chest and ass.

Ginny experienced an overwhelming urge to sever several limbs, more so when those hands started pawing at fastenings and rubbing over areas she considered her personal property.

‘Sign my ass,’ the girl asked. She turned in order to entice the guys by wiggling her derrière. She was wearing a minuscule skirt and a lurid pink thong. Rock Giant generously obliged, leaning over the barrier to reach. ‘What about the rest of you?’

Spook made a perfunctory mark. Ash signed the hereto unblemished cheek – making Ginny’s jaw ache, she had to grit her teeth so hard – which left only a smidgen of room for Iain’s moniker.

‘How about a kiss too?’

If Ash put his mouth anywhere near that bitch’s ass, she was going to give him a fucking earful, and to hell with who heard it.

‘It might smudge the ink,’ he remarked, giving a playful wink. ‘Guys,’ he called to the security posse, ‘why don’t you let these ladies in so we can all have a drink and get comfortable?’

Security moved the barrier, and someone put on some background noise.

Spook caught her arm as she made to follow the group over to a square of sofas with a table at the centre. ‘Let him be a minute, Ginny. He’s just doing what’s expected of him. Why not go and wait down the hall? He won’t be long. We’ll arrange a diversion, so he can slip away.’

‘Maybe, but I’m tired of sneaking around. What’s wrong with me staying here?’

‘Everything if you don’t want shit getting out. Dani and Xane are still about – they’ve only nipped out for a moment. If she sees you there are going to be heaps of questions asked.’

‘Then I’ll make sure she doesn’t see me.’

‘Hey, Spook! Stop hogging the pretty lady and bring her over here,’ Iain shouted, waving both hands at them, because obviously six man-hungry ladies weren’t enough to keep him entertained. To be fair, they were mostly huddled up against Ash and Rock Giant, apart from one girl who stared mournfully at Spook.

‘Fuck!’ Spook hissed, with his back to the table. ‘This is on your head, Ginny.’

‘If he’s only going to be a minute, how bad can it get?’

Pretty darn terrible was the honest answer, starting with Iain’s insistence on wedging her into a corner of a sofa next to him, well away from Ash and his fawning girlies. The girl who’d called her ‘fat arse’ was virtually on Ash’s knee, and Iain made it pretty obvious that he wanted Ginny in a similar position.

Ginny was used to handling men, but Iain was the sort of creepy manipulative prick she normally reserved a knee in the balls for. That was a little hard to pull off while seated, although, if he suggested any more places where he’d like to put his tongue, she’d find a way. ‘You sure we haven’t met before?’ he asked, leaning into her and running a hand through the long strands of her hair. ‘You seem awful familiar. Did we sleep together?’

In his dreams, maybe.

‘I think you have me mixed up with someone else.’

‘No, not over having met you. There aren’t many girls I’ve met with eyes that colour – hmm, sweet honey gold,’ he mused.

‘Whisky,’ Ash remarked, showing that despite appearances he was aware that she was present. ‘They’re like a fine malt.’

‘Aged,’ remarked the bitch.

‘I bet you’ve a kick like a fine malt too.’ Iain flicked back his red-streaked hair to see her better. He then settled his hand on her knee.

From the corner of her eye, Ginny watched Ash stir uncomfortably. The girl on his knee noticed it too, because she was suddenly straddled across his lap, with her hands on his face, demanding eye contact. You don’t need her, her body language said. I’ve got what you need right here. She clasped Ash’s hands, raised them to her breasts, clamped his palms right over her fat nipples and held them there.

‘I have met you,’ Iain said. His gaze flicked back and forth between her and Ash, or maybe that was her gaze. ‘You were backstage on the opening night. You turned me down for this klutz.’ He shot a look at Ash, who was glaring at her as if he were about to fire laser beams from his pupils. Then, smiling, Iain leaned in closer to Ginny. ‘I know a way to ensure you’re in his bed again tonight.’

Thank God, he was simply assuming she was here for a repeat performance, and hadn’t remembered that he’d also run into her in Paris, making a late-night exit from the tour bus.

Iain slid his hand further up her thigh, prompting Ginny to snap her own hand down on top of it.

‘Aw, come on babe, I can tell you’re the sort who likes to live a little bit wild. You should know Ash and I go way back. Why don’t you let the both of us show you a good time?’

‘Maybe because I’m not desperate and I don’t fancy you.’

‘You know you’re not going to get to him any other way. The guy’s got his hands real full right now. The only way he’s going to get free is if a friend steps in to offer some aid right now.’

‘Ash,’ Spook said on cue. ‘Time to wrap it up. We’ve a long drive ahead.’

Ginny knew for a fact they weren’t departing yet. The roadies were still loading equipment, and Ash had specifically told her they weren’t leaving until around 2 a.m. He’d planned for them to spend several hours together in his dressing room with the door bolted.

‘Sorry,’ Ash apologised, trying to rise at the same time as persuading the girl to move off his lap. ‘Looks as if our time’s up.’

‘I could join you,’ the girl said, still clinging on tight. ‘I ain’t got nothing on tomorrow, or the day after that.’ She was in his face, holding his jaw and turning it so that she ensured she had his complete attention. ‘I bet I know some really fun ways to make the journey pass quickly.’

‘That sounds very tempting, but –’

‘Shhh!’ The girl silenced him with her fingers. ‘You don’t want to make me cry now, do you?’

‘Of course not.’ He’d just about managed to stand now, but he was utterly failing to get her to take her hands off his bum. ‘I don’t like to make any woman cry.’

‘Then don’t say goodbye, say –’

She whispered the last part too quietly for Ginny to hear it, but the gist was obvious enough, as was the fact that Ash wasn’t saying no. ‘Fuck!’ she swore, suddenly on her feet as the queen bitch savaged his face with her poisonous kisses. She’d tear the little troll’s head off.

Ginny reached out, only for Iain to rear up behind her and snag her arm. ‘You won’t get him that way, I promise you that. Last-chance offer,’ he crooned into her ear, while he rubbed his fly against her rear.

The last thing she needed while she was watching her boyfriend being ugly-kissed by a tramp was to have a fuckwit poking her in the arse. ‘Back the fuck off,’ she snapped at him, causing everyone in the vicinity to gape at her. ‘Keep your fucking hands off me.’ Well, everyone except the person who really ought to have been paying attention, because he was too busy having his face sucked. ‘And fuck you too, Ash Gore.’

That at least did the trick. Ash pushed the girl to one side, so he could look at her. Frown lines furrowed his brow, and a pulse throbbed in his temple, but he had nothing for her. No apology, no explanation, just stone-cold silence.

‘Mate, you’re welcome to this one,’ Iain drawled. ‘She’s wacko.’

‘Ash, don’t let her spoil our fun,’ the trollop crooned. She stroked his arm as if he were hers and didn’t need to be bothered with some strange flaky lady.

Ash took a step forward, which only made her cling on harder.

Ginny held her arms rigidly by her sides, her fists clenched. A couple of words, some acknowledgement, that’s all he needed to do and he could fix things. They could forget about it and move on.

‘Don’t be jealous, babe.’ He spoke to her as if she were a stranger, while he held his hand out to her, as if he expected her to take it and croon like the rest of the harem he’d gathered. Was this the reason why he wanted to keep her at a distance, not to ensure their privacy but so he could still hang with the girls post-show, knowing she was safely out of the way?

Ginny stumbled backwards in her heels away from all of them. ‘Chill out, sweetheart. I’ll be with you shortly.’

She shook her head. No. No. He would not be with her shortly. But she didn’t open her mouth, because any attempt to speak would result in a scene that would go down in rock history. It wouldn’t be pretty. There’d probably be casualties.

He came closer. ‘Why don’t you go with Spook? He’ll show you the dressing room.’ Sure, his blue eyes were pleading, but she wasn’t biting.

‘Why don’t you go screw yourself?’

Ginny back stepped several more paces, then turned and stormed towards the nearest exit. She was not going to stand here and be treated like dirt, because she knew what happened when you took that sort of shit: you ended up being trodden into the carpet. She hit the bar on the fire exit, pushing it open and no doubt tripping a host of alarms, only to smack straight into one of the roadies. The blond one with the gravity-defying shorts that Dani had mentioned a couple of times when they’d spoken on the phone.

‘Hey.’ He put his hands on her shoulders to steady her. ‘Where’s the fire?’

‘Under Ash Gore’s arse if I have to speak to him again.’

‘Oh, OK then.’ He released her and stepped back a pace. ‘I won’t hold you up then, since he’s coming.’

Ginny didn’t wait to let Ash catch up but kept on walking. At the front of the arena she’d be able to catch a cab. Then it was just a matter of grabbing her bags and getting on the first available flight or ferry. A nice slow cruise across the North Sea sounded ideal right about now.