Brooklyn, NY. September 4, 2016.
“What’s the book that changed your life?” It’s a question that comes up a lot among people who identify as being “on the path” (or OTP, as my friend Elyssa puts it). Who has been the teacher, they want to know, and what have been the words of wisdom that have most inspired you to keep seeking?
Well, I can never just name one. When I first met the Pisces he was reading The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho, the story of a young shepherd boy who learns to follow his intuition and read the Universal omens in his quest for worldly treasure. Which, obviously, I took as a sign that here was a pile of man-shaped treasure right in front of me (especially since my family name was even Shepheard back then!).
Eat, Pray, Love, which I read as I was first starting my job at Style magazine, was another inspiration to march to the beat of my own drum, and I’ve quoted from Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic and Brené Brown’s Daring Greatly, among other texts that have had a lasting impact on my worldview, in these pages. But honestly? The real answer to that question for me now is that this book changed my life.
Not that I’m, like, so in love with my own pearls of wisdom. Although there IS everything I’ve been saying—which I hope you’ve got loud and clear by now—about our own inner Voice always being our best teacher. Rather, it’s been doing my research, actively walking my own talk, and living in real-life-human time the experiences I’ve shared with you here, that’s caused the shift. It’s one thing to read a book that moves you to tears (while nabbing a few killer quotes to post on Instagram), but physically living the lessons is what brings it all to life. And during the eighteen months it’s taken to produce this book, this has led me to forge such a deep and unshakable connection to my truth, to my path, that life has become unrecognizable. In a good way!
At the age of forty, I feel physically healthier than ever. I have (mainly) regular periods, and I have been known to declare that my digestion is, for the most part, “flawless.” The daily anxiety I used to feel about meeting deadlines, let alone A-list celebrities, is a thing of the past. When I splurge on designer clothes these days, they’re usually secondhand (sustainable fashion at its finest!). And the thought of getting “out of it” with drugs or alcohol feels like a sad substitute for tuning in to my own carefully curated and lovingly tended reality. I know, I know, #smug. But also #sorrynotsorry.
And anyway, that’s just the fluff.
In the intro I might have said some stuff about, I don’t know, world peace. And I kind of embarrassed myself by including such a beauty queen cliché. But what I really meant was that, already, I could see how following my path into the numinous was making me kinder, more compassionate, more giving, and less self-absorbed. How seeking to truly know, accept, and forgive myself (how to unconditionally love myself), was making me waaaay less obsessed with accumulating stuff to make me feel good—and waaaay more connected to the fact that what feels really GREAT is helping others, creating really cool shit, and in some way contributing to the greater good.
Since then (yes, in the past eighteen months), I’ve gone from thinking of The Numinous as a cool girls’ astrology site to seeing it as a platform for spreading this message as far and wide as I can (as well as a cool girls’ astrology site). Based on my own journey with alcohol, I’ve started an event series for the “sober curious” called Club SÖDA NYC, which is designed to remove some of the stigma around choosing a more sober life, and to remind people just how high we can get on our own supply. I’ve launched Moon Club, a monthly mentoring program to inspire a new generation of seekers to become “spiritual activists” in their communities. And at the time of writing this, I’m organizing an initiative for World Peace Day titled #TuneInPeaceOut—based on the idea that the first step toward creating more peace in our communities (our world, why not!) is to seek peace within ourselves.
So this is the direction my life is going as a result of writing (and reading, many times over) this book. What has revealed itself as my wider path. Which is not, by any means, to suggest that you put it down and immediately start preaching peace, altruism, and sobriety (but also do, since that would serve my mission nicely, thank you!).
But what I hope you will feel inspired to do is begin, in earnest, a thorough investigation into your truth, and your path. The path of your ultimate health, happiness, fulfillment, and empowerment. And as a result, the path of your dharma. Not to mention have a bunch of fun, make some heartfelt new friendships, and enjoy endless adventures while you’re at it.
How? Begin by getting to know your birth chart, with the help of any of the brilliant astrologers whose work is featured on The Numinous. Book a session with an intuitive or tarot reader who resonates with you (again, my recommendations are on the site, and everybody does Skype readings these days if you’re not in the U.S.). Of course, do the yoga, the meditation, and the green juice (yada yada), but THEN pay attention to the wider changes you will very likely find yourself feeling called to implement as a result.
I often describe the practices and healing modalities I cover on The Numinous as “the missing piece in the wellness puzzle”—because, guess what? In my experience, when you clean up your diet and begin to take better care of the physical, you will automatically be asked (by the Universe, Source, your higher Self, etc.) to pay more attention to your mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. And to make any necessary adjustments to your priorities accordingly.
Eddie Stern, my philosopher friend whom you met in the chapter on yoga, recently wrote a piece for The Numinous about the Hindu concepts of sakala, the reality we experience “with form,” and nishkala, the reality that is “without form.” In other words, our outer, quantifiable, world (body, possessions, money, social media, even the Universe) and our inner, unquantifiable, realms (knowledge, love, compassion, dreams, hopes, and potential). The Material and the Mystical. The here and now and . . . the numinous.
“In yoga,” he wrote, “knowing who we are is the solution to all misery. For when we don’t know who we are, we are limited by the external things we measure ourselves against (sakala). We measure, we compare, and we are miserable in doing so, because we always come up short. Yoga teaches that when we truly know who we are, we are immeasurable, pure consciousness (nishkala).”
In other words, it is in seeking to know the unknowable, to connect to the truth of our numinous nature, where our unlimited potential, and our true freedom, lies. And if I could wish anything for you, me, and (why not?) for all humanity, it’s for us to be free.